The Complete Groupie Trilogy (93 page)

He scooted the chair closer and took her hand in his. He didn’t want to hurt her. He just wanted to do the best he could for both his kids. “That’s not my intention,” he promised. “I want to find a compromise for all of us.”

“Really?” she asked with the hopefulness of a child.

He nodded. “Of course. It’s a mess and I helped make the mess. All I can do now is do my best to clean it up.”

Her chin trembled. “I know it’d be easier if I just disappeared. Then you could be happy.”

“I could never be happy at someone else’s expense, Holly. That’s not who I am anymore.” She didn’t look convinced. “But at the same time, I know I can’t make everyone happy. I have to do what is right for me. I’m in love with Andy. I have been for a long, long time. And despite all the pain I put her through, she loves me, too. This is my future. It’s not changing. I can give you money. I can set you up and give you a certain amount of security. But I can’t give you my heart, Holly. It’s not mine to give.”

Tears rolled down her face. It was clearly not the news she wanted to hear. She took a deep breath. “I wish I could tell you to take your money and shove it,” she said. “But you’re right. I have nothing. And that’s not fair to our baby.”

“That’s why I’m here.”

She nodded. “If you really mean what you say, if you really want to compromise and work together for the future of our baby, then I think I know a way you can do that. Without marrying me,” she added.

“I’m all ears,” he said.

“Put Julian back in your band,” she said softly. “Give him the career he deserves. You know he has what it takes to take Dreaming in Blue to the next level.”

“Holly…” he began, but she cut him off.

“What better way could there be to show me you’re not going to just discard me once the baby’s born? This way you prove that we’re in it together, that our future is guaranteed – even if it’s only as co-parents and not a couple.”

“I can’t just say yes to that, Holly. I can’t forget that you and Julian came here deliberately to con me out of money. How can I trust him with my band?”

“The only reason we conned for money was because we had nothing. We came from nothing, Vanni. You know that. And you know what that’s like.” He said nothing so she went on. “You also know what it’s like to make stupid mistakes when you think you have no chance to get what you really want.”

“That’s a great sob story, Hol, but the gaping hole is that he was willing to go along with conning me even after he became a legitimate member of the band.”

She lowered her head. “That was my fault. By the time I thought I got pregnant, I didn’t want your money anymore. I wanted you.”

His eyes leveled on her face. “And did you tell that to the guy in Denver, too?”

Her breath caught. It was the first time he brought up her past, letting her know just how much he’d uncovered about her. “That was different,” she said. “I didn’t love him. I thought once he married me, he’d give Julian the chance at his own career. I know I’ve made mistakes, Vanni, but I swear to you it was for the right reasons.”

“There’s a right reason to use people?” he wanted to know.

“You tell me,” she said. “You slept with me on Thanksgiving because you knew you couldn’t have Andy. You were using me then.”

“I had the help of some little blue pills,” he pointed out.

“That was Leo. He wanted to see us get together because he was tired of seeing Andy dick you around.” She touched his hand. “But did you really need them to make love to me, Vanni?”

He withdrew his hand. She was right. Despite his excuses of being inebriated and unknowingly drugged, he had slept with her because he wanted to.

He had used her, and that was what put them into this mess.

“Fine,” he said. “I’ll think about it. Nothing will be done with the band until after the show anyway.”

“He could work with Yael, like they were doing while you were in rehab last year,” she pointed out. “Just put him to work, Vanni. It’ll help everything.”

“I’ll think about it,” he reiterated, though he really didn’t think Andy or Graham would go for the idea.

The nurse came back in to administer a new IV. Holly looked so frail as she lay there, it was hard to believe she was casting such a huge threat over his future. He sighed again as he glanced down at his phone. “I have to get home,” he told her. “I’ll let you know about Julian,” he promised as he left the room.

The minute he passed through the doorframe he felt a weight lift from his shoulders. It was like taking off an extra coat. Dealing with Holly was a challenge that kept him emotionally drained from being on guard.

He hated himself for walking right into her trap. He knew better than that. But they knew just when to hit, when his downward spiral made him easy pickings for the vultures to swoop in. For whatever reasons, he had made poor choices. Now, no matter how hard it was, no matter how complicated, he had to try and make it right. Otherwise he was the selfish asshole everyone tried to say that he was.

PING still loitered on the street and sidewalks around his beach house as he pulled into the drive. He kept his head down and ignored their barrage of questions as he disappeared inside the front door. Andy was in the kitchen preparing a snack. She gave him a wry smile. “I guess our cover is effectively blown,” she commented. “How did Holly take it?”

He grinned as he headed into the kitchen and turned her into his arms. “How did you know?”

She leaned in, conspiratorially. “I’m a girl. Besides, I think I know how she operates after everything she put us through last year. No doubt she is watching your every move like a hawk. Watching a press conference regarding your new, highly-paid show would be at the top of her to-do list.”

“You are a wise woman,” he said as he planted a kiss on her upturned nose. “Too bad I didn’t take your advice a year ago.”

“You still haven’t answered my question,” she pointed out. “How did she take the news?”

“Aside from a screaming conniption and calling security to throw me out of her room, pretty well.”

Andy shook her head. “Predictable.”

“She’s scared, babe. She seems to think a court would favor us for custody since we have money and a family and security.”

“I can’t say I haven’t thought about it,” Andy confessed. She wasn’t mad at the baby, she was mad at Holly, and for very good reason. If they could prove Holly unfit, then they could manage their blended family without as much unnecessary drama and expense. They owed Vanni’s child – not the conniving woman trying to use him or her as a bartering tool.

Vanni, however, was surprised by her reaction. “Andy.”

She shrugged. “Tell me it wouldn’t be easier this way. As long as she’s in the picture, she’s going to play you like a marionette. You know that, right?”

“That’s not the point.”

“What is the point, Vanni?”

“A child needs his mother,” he said, as if he couldn’t believe he had to spell it out.

“Even if the mother is a virtual sociopath?” She could tell Vanni immediately shut down with her scathing comment. He was riding to Holly’s rescue again, even if he didn’t know it. “See what I mean? She’s gotten to you already.”

He watched as she stalked across the kitchen and banged through cabinets to complete the snack she no longer felt like eating. “You’re a mom now, Andy. Don’t you have any sympathy for her at all?”

Her eyes leveled on him. “No.”

He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. He understood her concerns, but to take away another woman’s child simply because it would make their life a little more convenient? It was inconceivable. He
was aghast as he stared at her.

“I’ll tell you who I do have sympathy for,” she said. “These two babies. They didn’t ask to be born into these situations and it’s up to us to protect them.”

“That’s what I’m trying to do,” he insisted.

“No, you’re trying to make everyone happy. As usual. When are you going to realize that’s impossible? Think about it. As long as she has access to her child, she has access to you. Like right now – she’ll text you and you’ll drop everything to run to the hospital just to make sure she’s okay.”

“She needs me, Andy. And she’s carrying my child. What the hell am I supposed to do?”

“I just want to know how far you are willing to go. What’s it going to take to make her happy? Because we both know that is the priority you’re chasing right now.”

“That’s bullshit and you know it. You’re the one with my ring on your finger.”

“For now.”

He grew more annoyed with her. “You’re right, Andy. You busted me. I want to marry the both of you. Let’s move to Utah and have our own commune.”

“Stop being facetious.”

“Stop being paranoid,” he shot back. “I told Holly tonight that my future is with you. That I’m in love with you. She knows she has no chance with me.”

Andy chortled in disgust. “Then what does she want? Because she wants something, that much I know.”

“I told you. She wants a little bit of security. She’s had to fight for everything she’s ever had –”

“Stolen,” Andy corrected, but he went on.

“Whatever. But I’m not going to use her like some brood mare and kick her back out into the streets once she serves no further purpose. If we were all solely judged by the sins of our past I’d be locked up in a jail cell right now after what happened with Baylee. All that matters to her right now is the wellbeing of her baby. She’s not strong like you, babe. She can’t do this on her own.” He took a deep breath. “That’s why I’m thinking about putting Julian back in the band.”

It was Andy’s turn to be aghast. “What?”

“Think about it. Julian is taking care of her. If I invest in his future, she won’t feel so threatened and want to come between us.”

“How can you even think about trusting either of them after what they did to you last year? These are not good people, Vanni. I’m bewildered why you keep trying to treat them as though they just made a few mistakes. They deliberately tried to con you out of your money. You were a target. You
are
a target.”

He shrugged. He couldn’t deny what she was saying. But he also had very limited choices how to handle it. “Keep your friends close and your enemies closer,” he offered.

She said nothing as she threw the towel over the plate of fruit and veggies she had been preparing when he had come in. She stalked from the kitchen.

“Aren’t you going to eat?” he asked her departing back.

“I’m not hungry,” she shot back before she climbed the stairs toward the loft. He sighed as he banged his head softly against the kitchen cabinet.

Neither Vanni nor Andy resurrected the argument that evening, though its shadow loomed large over them as they stewed silently. Things were tense between them right up to the following morning, when they met with the real estate agent Kelly had found for them. They had four houses on their list, but even looking at the nice properties available to them didn’t
do much to lift their spirits.

Finally liberated from the secretive bubble they had lived in for the past few months, they were able to go out to dinner and actually be seen in public. Everyone wanted to see the ring on her finger, which she really wanted to flash by giving them all the bird. Instead she kept her head down and they ignored the paparazzi like the buzzing mosquitos they were as they tried to carry on as normally as possible.

They spent their evening at a high-scale shopping center, where she was finally able to purchase her first maternity shirt and some odds and ends for their little Bean. They picked out a receiving blanket and some one-piece sleepers, along with a sling she could use to carry the baby close to her heart.

It was the only thing to break the ice between them.

They danced around the Holly/Julian topic, and Vanni overcompensated by spoiling her rotten. Whatever she wanted, he made sure she got. He even turned off his phone so that he wouldn’t be at Holly’s beck and call.

The next day they were scheduled to see five more houses. He wanted to stay toward the beach, but away from Malibu, so they looked at secured estates in Rancho Palos Verdes, just south of where they currently resided. It was on the second house of the day where both Andy and Vanni fell in love with a sprawling Mediterranean-style home that covered more than 6000 square feet, just blocks away from the ocean. The master bedroom was located
on the second floor, with a private deck with panoramic views of the Pacific. It had five bedrooms, a den and a private office, along with a gourmet kitchen with separate quarters for any staff they might need.

It was warm and welcoming while still being private and secure. Immediately Vanni and Andy knew they had found the house they were looking for. Their mood brightened considerably. By Monday they had made an offer, and by Friday they began paperwork to own the magnificent mansion that was cozy enough to be called home.

They even daydreamed about an intimate wedding in the enormous back yard, which came complete with a gazebo and lagoon pool. All this kept Andy busy as she prepared to move into and decorate the new home, prepare for a wedding and for the arrival of their child. There were only a few months left to accomplish it all, so she leaned heavily on Kelly to help keep her organized, particularly as part of the creative staff on
Fierce
.