The Complete Groupie Trilogy (13 page)

She begged me to go as a personal assistant, and Jasper seemed perfectly willing to pawn off those duties to an underling who took maybe four figures less than anyone else in New York.

It was still four figures more than I would have been making anywhere else, and traveling to Vegas meant I could score some travel articles as well. I didn’t get out there nearly enough, and it was a resource that had always been good to me.

Over the past few months Vanni and I had fallen into a comfortable relationship. He called me at least once every week with updates on what gigs they booked and where he was scheduled to appear, but he kept the conversation light and friendly with no sexual overtones in respect of t
he decision I made in New York.

He didn’t talk about Lourdes unless asked. However with her being cast in a major action film thanks to her appearance in the video I got the not-so-distinct pleasure of chatting with her on a regular basis as well.

She sold the love story way more than Vanni seemed willing to, but it stung a lot less knowing that it was all malarkey. She seemed to sense the casual dismissal on my part for all her flowery details, even though I usually printed her comments verbatim on the website and in her press releases. This kept our relationship cordial but cool.

I had no illusions about my relationship with her. I knew I was just one more customer to sell her story to, and she was no doubt comforted by the fact I was not a threat to her reputation or her relationship.

I wasn’t especially excited that she’d be in Vegas with the band, doing a convention of some sort for lingerie models. Nor, honestly, was I looking forward to spending time with Jasper and Athena for that matter, who were going to be there for Athena’s debut at one of the casinos.

But the money was good, the possibilities for more were endless and I got to hang out with my friends in the band. Truthfully that was what they felt like now. They were no longer some guys in a band I’d listen to, they were friends I could email or
text or even call on the phone.

Felix especially had become my email and chat buddy, who could be counted upon to send me funny photos and news articles at least once a week with no other purpose than to make me laugh.

Iain was more standoffish, allowing Alana to manage most of our friendship. I felt it was shrewd on his part to avoid any kind of misunderstanding between two female friends. He’d obviously been burned before, and respected Alana too much to add any kind of weird competitive overtones to the relationship.

Yael was standoffish as well, but there were nights when he’d call in the middle of the night when he was working through lyrics and wanted my input as a writer. We’d soon get off on other topics, such as politics, and stay on the phone until dawn.

So my association with DIB was no longer based solely on Vanni. As such as I was so deeply entrenched in their lives and invested in their successes that I really had no choice but to fly to Vegas in the hot desert heat and play Girl Friday for an entire weekend.

I’d be lying if I said that my stomach wasn’t in a knot thinking of spending time with Vanni, especially now that the rules had been established. He hadn’t necessarily stopped wanting me as much as he wanted to protect me from getting hurt.

This endeared him to me even when I knew that I should keep my focus on the fact we couldn’t be together. I couldn’t afford to entertain any slight possibility he may still think about it even a little.

Still, when I heard “my” song, which was now playing everywhere, it was hard not to romanticize him to some degree. His voice was smooth like silk as it flowed between each note, like fingers flowing through my hair and sending all those delicious little tingles down each and every inch of my skin. That alone would have been enough to fall in love with it. But for me it was more intimate. It was a secret love letter that only I knew the real story behind, because I was the true recipient. It was a secret only we shared – and that
made it all the more priceless.

The closer it came to our weekend in Vegas I could only imagine what seeing him sing that song to me was going to do to my resolve to stay uninvolved.

I wished that Jacob could have gone but he had to hold down the fort while Jasper was away. He was more than an assistant, and I often chided he needed to ask for a raise. He countered and said I needed to ask for money, period.

It was Jacob I could bounce my feelings off of whenever I had a weak moment, remembering how goo
d it was when I was with Vanni.

He’d remind me that it was really good until it wasn’t, and it was the “wasn’t” part that made it a bad idea.

But he was a red-blooded male with a throng of admirers that filled his social calendar on a weekly and monthly basis. He understood the temptation to give in to wild abandon, and often joked I should just sleep with Vanni and get it over with. “Solve the mystery. Get the monkey off your back. Then you can move on to someone else. I hear Bon Jovi is coming to town next week.”

It was just encouraging enough that I very nearly almost purchased another corset for the trip. It was Vegas, I reasoned. It was the perfect city to slut it up. It didn’t have to me
an I was trying to tempt Vanni.

Instead I bought comfy pajamas, something I could lounge around in during the five minutes alone I’d get in my hotel each and every night I was there.

If I’m sleeping alone, I might as well be comfortable.

But my additional duties did warrant some additions to the wardrobe, and even though Iris wasn’t there to pick out my clothes like the doting mother hen she was, I think I did all right. The most aggravating part was it required yet another suitcase, one I would have to check.

I also had to rent a car for several of the duties that I had, so that meant it was an entire hour from the time the plane landed until I was able to leave the airport. With Vegas traffic it took even longer to get to the hotel that was only three miles from the airport. By the time I turned the car over to the valet I was looking forward to the free liquor perk of Las Vegas casinos.

There were flowers to greet me, two vases this time, one from Jasper and one from Vanni, whose message was a cryptic, “
Looking forward to seeing you, V
.” There was also a big box on my bed with a big blue bow. Curious, I tore into the shimmery wrapping paper and within the tissue I found at least three outfits tucked inside. The card read, “Didn’t think I’d let you down just because I couldn’t be there, did you? Have fun! Give our boys a big hug from me. Iris.”

I laughed as I inspected the goodies. One was a semi-formal dress she no doubt chose for the after-party. I had brought along the blue and black ensemble from the last adventure, which would have made her keel over from a stroke. She probably suspected I would dare to recycle and this wa
s what prompted her generosity.

Iris was a public relations queen. She knew all about protecting image.

This dress was almost a flaming blood orange color, with a yellow and white water color print and sprinkling of sparkly rhinestones. It had spaghetti straps and a sweetheart neckline, which dove modestly between the girls. It momentarily made me regret not buying the corset, because that was the best way to enhance that neckline and give it its proper due.

The next item i
n the box: a white lace corset.

I wondered if she would have sent that little present to me if she knew exactly how much trouble I could get into wearing it? It looked almost bridal – she really would die from shock if I ended up at some drive thru chapel in a drunken stupor. The thought made me giggle.

There were two casual but hip ensembles complete with accessories and jewelry, and even a case of makeup since she knew I would never bring any of my own.

I checked my watch. I had at least an hour before I had to meet the guys downstairs for a sound check in the theater where their concert was scheduled, then accompany them (i.e. chauffeur them) to the radio station for thei
r interview, promoting the gig.

I figured I had just enough time to transform myself into the proper PR stand-in that would make Iris proud. I hopped in the shower and twenty minutes later I stood before the mirror in black leggings and a cold shoulder top that was deep blue and made of lightweight, breathable material. It had slits at the top of each sleeve and an elastic band at the bottom, with silver studs around the neckline.  I looked like I belonged with the band, or at the very least in Las Vegas. I mentally sent Iris mental thanks for the confidence boost.

As soon as I gave my name at the box office I was issued a pass and escorted backstage. I could hear the band warming up for practice and my heart did a happy little jig against my ribcage. I saw Vanni before I saw anyone else, but a man who stood 6’3 and had long dark hair down his back was a little hard to miss.

Felix saw me first and hopped down off the stage to run and give me a big hug. The others were quick to follow, although Vanni hung back to say hello to me last. I got a brief, full-body hug but nothing that would ever make the others suspect that anything had ever passed between us.

For some reason I found that especially painful, as if I couldn’t share a part of myself with my new friends. But he had an image to uphold and I had made my choices accordingly. It was hard to be mad at him for very long, especially when he bestowed upon me that smirk.

The afternoon was filled with all sorts of activity, and fortunately a significa
nt shortage of lingerie models.

She had her own thing to do in Vegas and didn’t need to play devoted girlfriend, and I could tell Vanni was able to let his hair down – figuratively speaking – in her absence. We spent about an hour at the radio station and then we were off to an early lunch at a sushi bar located in the hotel. I wasn’t especially keen on the idea, even though I loved seafood. I just generally pre
ferred my meat products cooked.

The guys, particularly Yael and Felix, schooled me in good sushi so I was able to find several rolls that I fell in love with in the first bite. I was such a sushi novice I had no idea some of them were cooked, and those quickly became my “training wheels” for other sorts of sushi. It was also a very filling meal considering, and the guys and I spent most of the next hour chatting and catching up.

Vanni was still rather distant, but cordial, through the interaction. It was extremely hard to read how he felt about my being there at all.

Was it over? Had his feelings disappeared the minute I turned him down?

Jacob didn’t seem to think so when we had spoken about the trip just days before. He felt that Vanni would always go after those things, and people, he couldn’t have. “Never sleep with him,” he advised, “and he’ll love you forever.”

I wasn’t so sure about that, given he barely even looked at me, and when he did it was with this unreadable expression that I immediately sensed was disguising some sort of discomfort or problem.

Everyone disbanded around 5:00 p.m., to go change and prepare for the concert.

I knew that the semi-formal dress was the one I had to wear for the occasion, but with how peculiar Vanni was acting my enthusiasm to glam it up and be extra sexy had waned. Still, it’s all about image. So I changed and put on my own mask as I headed downstairs for the show.

The V.I.P. spots were reserved in the balcony, which meant I couldn’t get a front-row seat. I sat with the other executives and high rollers, but Jasper, Athena and Lourdes were all M.I.A. Instead I chatted with one of the other band’s managers and the champagne flowed while the four acts performed.

DIB was third in the lineup, and I could tell immediately how successful they were becoming when the first note of “Make it Happen” brought the fans on the floor below to their feet. I sat quietly and observed how the girls in the front row responded when he sang, “Inside Out” and “Baby, Say My Name.” Unlike the New York venue these fans wanted intimate access, and were throwing flowers, clothing and even a few hotel keys on stage.

They closed with “Wanting Her,” and played the corresponding video behind the band. Vanni jumped down off the stage and walked right up to every girl in the front row, singing each line directly to them. Some he even touched their faces, or held their hands.

I swallowed the huge lump in my throat.
This is his brand
, I reminded myself.
It’s still my song
. I knew that everything he did was carefully orchestrated to broaden his fan base and increase album and concert sales. How many of those girls were going to run straight to the box office to buy a ticket for the following night, just because he made them feel like there was a connection tonight?

I quietly exited the balcony area after they left the stage, and headed back downstairs to the club that hosted the huge after-party celebrating the first night of the concert series. At first I didn’t see any of the guys, and I felt a little awkward standing there by myself looking like a lost rabbit.

“I hate these things,” I heard a male voice say from behind. I turned to see the manager I sat next to during the first couple of acts. His name was Graham something-or-another, and he had flown in from L.A. to support the opening act.

Regardless of how little we had chatted, he was at least a familiar face and I didn’t feel like I stuck out like a sore thumb. I made a face. “Me too,” I said. “Someone needs to tell famous people not everything is cause for celebration.”