The Cobbler's Kids (32 page)

After several sleepless nights in his digs he convinced himself that he should move to Scotland Road. It would be no harder to conceal his true feelings than it was now, when they were working side by side in the shop, he assured himself.

As it was, he reasoned, once Eddy had left he would worry himself to distraction if he had to come back to New Brighton each night, knowing that he was leaving Vera there on her own.

At the last minute, however, he had second thoughts and determined that as soon as he arrived at the shop the next day he would tell Eddy that he couldn’t do it. He wouldn’t give him the true reason, that it was because of the way he felt about Vera. He’d find some excuse or the other. After all, he told himself, he was under no obligation to take on the responsibility for Michael Quinn so why should he let himself be conned into doing it simply so that Eddy could start a new life in Malta?

But when he arrived at the shop, Vera seemed so delighted that he was ready to move in that he changed his mind again immediately. Since she was in his thoughts night and day, how could he have ever, even for one minute, contemplated disappointing her, he asked himself.

He would never forget the look of happiness on her face as they talked over their living arrangements. He could see that she’d planned everything in great detail and he began to speculate that perhaps she did care about him more than he thought.

He wouldn’t build up his hopes, but he could dream. If there was even the slimmest chance that his friendship with Vera might develop into a full-blown relationship he’d do everything in his power to help it along.

Benny accepted the new arrangement without comment or showing any real interest. It was July and his examination results weren’t due for a while. He was hoping for high marks, but worrying in case he didn’t do as well as he anticipated.

Eddy and Vera had discussed between themselves what the next step ought to be for Benny. But when they tried to talk to him about his future he was evasive and uncomfortable. He insisted that he still had no idea what he wanted to do with his life.

‘Well, a lot depends on what your exam results are like, doesn’t it?’ Eddy challenged him.

‘To some extent it does,’ Benny admitted, avoiding Eddy’s penetrating stare. ‘The better my marks then the more openings there will be.’

‘What sort of openings?’ Eddy probed. ‘You keep saying that you haven’t a clue what you want to do! Surely you must have some idea about how you want to earn a living?’

‘Yes, I have, but I don’t think it’s possible, so there’s really no point in talking about it,’ Benny muttered.

‘What sort of stupid answer is that?’ Eddy said irritably.

‘If there’s something you really want to do, Benny, then why don’t you tell us what it is?’ Vera urged. ‘You never know, we may be able to help you.’

‘Look, Benny, I’m leaving Liverpool in a couple of days’ time,’ Eddy told him, ‘and I’d like to see your future settled. If you have something in mind that you want to do then, like Vee said, let’s hear it.’

Benny looked uncomfortable and fiddled with the pen he was holding.

‘Come on, spit it out,’ Eddy said impatiently.

‘Well, if you really want to know I’d like to stay on and take my Higher School Certificate. Then, if I get good marks, I’d like to go to university.’

‘Bloody hell!’ Eddy ran his hand over the top of his head. ‘You don’t want much, do you, kiddo?’

‘Well, you did ask,’ Benny defended, his face turning beetroot red.

‘I know I did, but this wasn’t the sort of answer I was expecting to get. Whew! Have you thought it through, whacker?’

‘Of course I have! I’ve thought of nothing else for months.’

‘Did you know about this?’ Eddy asked looking at Vera.

She shook her head. ‘This is the first I’ve heard about it. Benny has been studying very hard, though,’ she added as an afterthought.

‘Studying is one thing, keeping him in food and clothes and putting a roof over his head until he gets through that lot is another.’

‘He has a home, here.’

‘Yes, but there’s more involved than just having somewhere to live. He’ll need food, clothes, money in his pocket and heaven knows what else. I could go on forever. If he stays at school and gets his Higher School Certificate and goes to university, well, all that’s going to take another five years at least. Bloody hell! It doesn’t bear thinking about! No,’ Eddy shook his head. ‘It’s out of the question.’

‘Does it have to be?’ Vera argued, ‘We agreed he already has a roof over his head, and as long as the shop is providing us with a living there’s enough money to put food on the table. He can take that for granted.’

‘What about clothes? The trousers and jacket he’s got on at the moment are at half-mast! The collar on his shirt is fraying and it’s so damn tight that it’s almost choking him.’

‘It’s the end of term,’ Vera pointed out, ‘I thought he would be leaving school in a couple of weeks so I’ve put off buying him new clothes until I know what he intends to do next. There was no point in buying him a smart suit if he was going to be a labourer down on the docks, now was there?’ she stated tartly.

‘Docker, him?’ Eddy gave a short sharp laugh. ‘He’s got brains for something better than that, even if he can’t stay on at school.’

‘Then I’ll kit him out with whatever he needs. I’ve already told you, Eddy, we’re not on the breadline. We can manage comfortably as long as we’ve got the money coming in from the shop, remember.’

‘And is it?’

‘Of course it is. Jack is a first-class repairer: we’re doing more business now than we’ve ever done.’

‘You are at the moment, but what happens if Jack packs the job in, or asks for a rise, or is off ill?’

‘You’ve made pretty sure that Jack won’t leave. That was why you helped him decorate those two attic rooms, wasn’t it?’ Vera smiled.

‘No, I did that so that I knew there was someone here on call should you ever need help with the old man. It was to put my own mind at rest, knowing that I was going to be living so far away from you in future.’

Vera looked at him in bewilderment. ‘Shall we leave this discussion for the moment, give ourselves time to think over all the implications?’

‘Yes, if that’s what you want to do,’ Eddy agreed.

‘So that’s it, is it?’ Benny asked, his voice raw with disappointment.

‘No, not at all. We do need to think about it, though,’ Vera told him in a mild, firm voice.

Later, when they were on their own, Eddy said, ‘Why not see if we can persuade Benny to give up this hair-brained scheme …’

‘No.’ Vera reached out and laid a hand on his arm. ‘Let’s give him a chance, Eddy. You are doing what you want with your life so why not let him have the same opportunity?’

‘Do you know what you are saying?’ he blustered. ‘Do you realise what a rod you would be making for your own back?’

‘That might be so, but I’m sure I am doing what Mam would have done if she was alive. Doing this for Benny will be a tribute to her memory.’

Eddy’s face softened. ‘It’s a wonderful thought, Vee, but don’t forget you’ll have to do it all on your own. I won’t have any money to spare to be able to help you in any way. In a couple of months’ time I’ll have a kid of my own to support.’

‘I know that, Eddy, but there’s no need for you to worry about Benny.’

‘I’m afraid I do. I won’t be here to share any of the burden with you.’

‘That doesn’t matter. We’ll manage, Eddy! We’ve done so all these years while you’ve been hoarding every penny you earned so that you could marry Rita Farthing and get a place of your own.’

‘Yes, but Benny was only a young kid then. He didn’t need all that much, but now …’

‘I understand what you’re saying,’ Vera told him quietly, ‘and I do know exactly what I am taking on. But I want to see Benny do well more than anything else in the world.’

‘Isn’t sacrificing your own life to take care of Dad enough for you, Vee?’ he said, his gaze sharp and direct. ‘Isn’t it time that you had a life of your own? Time you found yourself a soul mate, married and had kids of your own to look after?’

‘Benny is as close to me as any child of my own could ever be,’ she told him firmly. ‘My mind’s made up, Eddy, so it is pointless saying any more. I’ve not said one word against what you are planning to do with your life so don’t criticise me.’

‘I can’t help feeling that you aren’t fully aware of what you are taking on,’ he persisted ruefully.

‘Look Eddy, I’ve wished you well in your new life, so can’t you do the same for me?’

He stared at her long and hard as if intent on persuading her to change her mind. When she returned his gaze unwaveringly, he pulled her towards him and hugged her. ‘Our Benny’s a lucky little bugger,’ he told her emphatically. ‘I only hope he appreciates all you are giving up to do this for him.’

‘I’m positive he will understand,’ Vera told him confidently.

Eddy still looked uncertain. ‘You’re quite sure that you’ll be all right?’ he asked. ‘What with this and Dad, you’re taking on an awful lot.’

‘I’ll be fine, Eddy. Remember, from now on I’ll have Jack here to help me if I need him.’

On the day when Eddy finally said goodbye to them all, Jack added his own reassurance.

‘I’m as comfortable as a pig in clover. I’ve got a cushy flat and a good cook to feed me three meals a day. There’s nothing at all for you to concern yourself about, Eddy. Rest assured I’ll keep an eye on things here. I’ll be on hand should Vera need any help, night or day, so you have nothing at all to worry about.’

‘Thanks, whacker! It means a hell of a lot to me!’ Eddy told him, slapping him heartily on the shoulder.

For the first couple of weeks after Jack Winter moved into the attic rooms over Quinn’s, he and Vera were walking on eggshells.

Both of them were scared of saying or doing anything that might embarrass or offend the other. Then, as time passed, the old comfortable familiarity that had been established after Jack came there to work reasserted itself.

It seemed perfectly natural to take their meals together in Vera’s living room. When he was well enough, Michael Quinn sat down at the table with them. Benny sometimes joined them, but even though his exams were over he still spent a great deal of his time in his bedroom.

At first Jack had worried that this was because he was there, but Vera assured him it wasn’t.

‘Benny has always preferred his own company. He likes to sit and read rather than talk to people.’

‘Doesn’t he ever go out with lads of his own age?’

‘He has one or two friends, but they don’t live around here.’

Jack pulled a face. ‘No, not many Scottie Road types go to grammar school, or want to go on to university. Do you think he’ll ever get there, Vee, or is it all pie in the sky?’

‘We’ll have to wait and see,’ Vera said quietly. ‘I think he will,’ she added confidently.

When the School Certificate results came through, they were all amazed at how well Benny had done. He had top marks in all of the seven subjects he’d taken.

‘The headmaster asked if I wanted to sit for my Highers,’ Benny told them.

‘I hope you told him that you intended to do so,’ Vera said quickly.

Benny’s face brightened. ‘You really mean that I can stay on?’

‘You know you can. We discussed all this with Eddy when he was here.’

‘I know, but I thought you might have realised how much was involved and changed your mind.’

‘When I say something, I mean it,’ Vera confirmed quietly.

Michael Quinn received the news with a shrug of his shoulders. ‘Whose going to run the shop, then, if Benny is staying at school?’

‘Jack will, of course, the same as he’s been doing for a long time.’

‘Jack?’ He looked puzzled.

‘Jack Winter. He lives here now, up in the attic rooms.’

‘I don’t think I’ve ever met him.’ He gave her a crafty stare. ‘Is he one of ours or is he one of the enemy,’ he hissed.

‘He’s the best friend and worker you’ve ever had,’ Vera told him.

‘Then why have I never seen him around or had a chance to talk to him?’

Vera didn’t bother explaining. Sometimes she felt saddened by her father’s oblivion of all that was happening around him. She knew that at one time she would have felt exasperated or quite angry, but not any longer. Jack had managed to persuade her that the best thing to do was either to ignore these lapses of memory on her dad’s part, or simply laugh about them.

More and more she wondered just how she would cope without Jack’s support. His caring nature and his ability to remain calm no matter what happened, gave her the strength to cope with all the many day-to-day problems with her father.

There was no doubt in either of their minds that her father was sinking into a world of his own. His attacks were now happening less, but he seemed to be retreating further and further back into his past.

Sometimes he asked constantly for Annie and looked for her in every room in the house, even in the shop. When he couldn’t find her he railed against both Vera and Jack. He claimed that they were deliberately trying to stop him from seeing her.

‘Don’t tell him that she’s dead,’ Jack advised, ‘that might only upset him more.’

‘So what can I do to stop him from looking for her?’

‘Tell him that she has gone away for a few days and that she will be back soon.’

Vera did as he said and she found that Jack was right. Not only did this console her dad, but it actually seemed to please him and make him more cheerful.

‘I’m marrying Annie as soon as she gets back,’ he kept telling Vera, and there was a happy, contented look on his face.

Everything seemed to be going so smoothly that Vera could hardly believe her good fortune.

Benny returned to grammar school in September and again spent all his time closeted in his bedroom, studying. He never discussed what he was working on with either her or Jack. Vera assumed this was because he knew they probably wouldn’t understand what he was talking about.

The shop was doing well and she and Jack had developed a system that worked smoothly.

At Jack’s suggestion, the two of them started going out to the pictures once a week.