The Choosing (26 page)

M
EREN
’
S
still asleep when Jerath enters his bedroom and quietly closes the door behind him. The color has returned to Meren’s cheeks now and he looks so much healthier already, but he still has a long way to go.

Jerath sits down on the edge of the bed and looks at his mate. He runs his hand through the bright blond hair that frames Meren’s face and smiles when Meren frowns in his sleep. He uses his fingers to trace the shape of Meren’s eyebrows, his nose, and the slight bow of his full lips. Meren stirs and opens his eyes, and Jerath grins at him before he leans down for a kiss.

“I didn’t expect to see you just yet. I thought you were going to see Serim?” Meren smiles back and reaches out, slotting his fingers with Jerath’s on top of the covers.

“I did see her… Mahli too.” Jerath pauses and takes a deep breath. This is it. This is the point that will shape the rest of his life, and he’s so full of nervous excitement he can hardly get the words out. “Meren, the rest of the shifters… they’re getting ready to leave. It’s time to go home.”

The smile disappears from Meren’s face and he looks up at Jerath with wide eyes. “Are you going with them?” he asks, voice so soft Jerath has to lean forward to hear it.

“Yes, I have to.”

Hurt flashes in Meren’s eyes. He pulls his hand back and tucks it away under the covers. “I see.” Pain and desperation flares across the bond, making Jerath flinch. He carefully grips Meren’s shoulders and holds him in place.

“No, Meren, I don’t think you do. I ne—”

“I understand, Jerath.” Meren sighs and closes his eyes in resignation. “You need to go home, to your family and friends. We knew this was going to happen… I just… I thought….” He scrubs a hand over his face before meeting Jerath’s gaze, and this time he smiles softly and the bond is flooded with warmth and longing. “Letting you go will be the hardest thing I’ve ever done, Jerath. But I understand why you need to leave.”

Meren’s eyes shine in the late afternoon light, and Jerath shakes his head as he struggles to find the right words. This is not how it’s supposed to go. He’s doing it wrong, not explaining himself well at all, and he needs to sort this mess out before things get any worse.

“I’m coming back, Meren.”

“What do you mean?”

Jerath feels the spark of hope in Meren’s chest and he smiles big and wide. “If it’s okay, if you want me… I’m coming back here”—he slides his hands up to cup Meren’s face—“to be with you.”

Meren stares at him for a moment or two before the words finally sink in, and then he reaches up and drags Jerath down until they’re kissing. Harsh, desperate kisses full of relief and joy, and Jerath is overwhelmed by the surge of emotion that flows over him.

“Fuck! Jerath.” Meren’s eyes are bright and his smile is huge when he eventually pulls back and lets them both breathe. “Are you trying to kill me?” he asks, but he’s laughing and Jerath has never seen him so happy. “I thought you were leaving for good, and that I’d never see you again.
Fuck!
”

He kisses Jerath again, but he’s smiling too much to do it properly. Jerath laughs and gently pushes him back onto the pillows. “So, does this mean you’re okay with the idea?”

Meren rolls his eyes, but holds Jerath’s hand again. “Of course I’m okay with it.” He strokes Jerath’s skin with the pad of his thumb. “So much more than okay.”

They sit in silence, drinking each other in with the new realization that this is for keeps. Jerath struggles to wrap his head around the idea that he has a mate now, and he can live his life without hiding a part of himself because others see it as unacceptable. It’s a heady feeling and almost too good to be true, but there are still some things he needs to take care of.

Meren seems to read his thoughts. “What about your mother? And your friends?” He looks worried again and Jerath’s quick to put him at ease.

“They’ll understand, Meren. I love my mother, and Serim, and Mahli very much, but I….” Jerath hesitates. They’ve never said the words before. It’s all happened so quickly between them that Jerath hasn’t dared to trust his feelings. But the magic of the bond is true, and he feels the love flowing between them both. He swallows down his fear and meets Meren’s eyes.

“I love you.” Jerath’s heart swells at the sight of Meren’s wide smile. “I want to be with you, and as much as I’ll miss my mother and my friends… I can’t live without
you
.”

“Come here.” Meren licks over his bottom lip and tugs on Jerath’s hand. He can’t sit up without help yet, so Jerath stretches out beside him on the bed.

Meren slips a hand around Jerath’s neck and into his hair. He drags him closer until their lips are almost touching but not quite. “I love you too.”

It’s just a whisper of words, but Jerath feels them all the way down to his bones. He edges that bit closer and captures Meren’s lips in a soft, lazy kiss. There’s no need to hurry now, so Jerath takes his time to lick into Meren’s mouth and savor every moment. They lie there on the bed, wrapped up in each other, and trade gentle touches until the sun starts to set.

T
HE
morning light filters in through the windows in Meren’s room, signaling the start of the day. Jerath watches Meren sleep, all tucked up under the thick fur blankets. He looks so peaceful and Jerath doesn’t want to wake him, but his people are waiting for him. It’s time for them all to leave and return to Eladir.

Jerath rests his hand on Meren’s shoulder, leans down and kisses his forehead. “Meren.” He gives him a gentle shake. “Meren.”

Meren wakes up slowly, smiling as he focuses on Jerath. “Hey, you’re up early.”

“Yeah.”

Meren’s smile falters and fades as he takes in Jerath’s expression. “Is it time, already?”

Jerath nods. “They’re waiting for me.”

The silence sits heavily between them. Neither one wants to be the first to say good-bye. It makes Jerath huff out a laugh and he reaches out to grasp Meren’s hand. “I won’t be gone long.”

“Long enough.” Meren sighs and squeezes Jerath’s hand. “How will it react, being so far away from each other?” He rubs both their hands across his chest. “The bond, I mean.”

“You’ll feel an ache in your heart that’ll get deeper the longer I’m gone, and it won’t stop until I return.” Jerath smiles softly and raises their hands so he can kiss Meren’s fingers. “But I will return, Meren.” He’s not sure how long it’ll take to get to Eladir from Chastil—he and Serim didn’t take the direct route here. They have to cross the vast grasslands before reaching the edge of the forest of Arradil, but Jerath is determined to be back with Meren as soon as he possibly can.

There’s a knock on the door, and Serim pokes her head in. “Are you ready, Jerath?”

She grins at Meren and comes in to hug him good-bye. “Thank you, Meren. For everything.”

She leans down and whispers something in Meren’s ear, making him laugh, and Jerath makes a mental note to ask her about that later.

Serim disappears back out the door with a pointed look at Jerath.

“I have to go.”

Meren pulls him down toward the bed and buries his face in the crook of Jerath’s neck. “Be careful, Jerath,” he whispers. “I’ll miss you.” He draws back to look Jerath in the eye. “But don’t come back until you’ve done everything you need to. I know how hard this is going to be for you, and everyone else.”

Jerath curls his hand around the back of Meren’s neck and kisses him hard. He pours everything into it—all the love and hope and desperation he’s feeling—and prays it’ll be enough to last them both. “Love you.”

“I love you too. Now go, before they march in here looking for you.”

Jerath already feels the ache in his chest as he turns and walks out the door.

E
VERYONE
’
S
waiting in the camp. Jerath sees Serim talking to Malek and Torek, and he walks over to join them.

“Finally!” Torek claps him on the back. “I thought we might have to send someone in to get you.”

“Sorry.” Jerath blushes a little and glares at Serim when she laughs.

Torek grins at him and excuses himself to go get everyone ready to leave.

“Torek and nine of my men will escort you home.” Malek gestures behind him and Jerath sees the men and wagons loaded up with supplies. A few of the men are busy saying good-bye to their women. There are tight hugs and kisses, and Jerath knows just how they feel.

Serim slips her hand into Jerath’s and he smiles, thankful for her silent support. “We can’t thank you enough for all your help,” Jerath says, offering his hand for Malek to shake.

Malek grips it firmly in both of his and nods. “Our two villages will always help each other, Jerath.” He glances over his shoulder in the direction of Meren’s house. “Even more so now.”

The men are all ready to leave and Malek ushers Serim and Jerath over toward Torek. “I understand you’ll be coming back to stay with us, Jerath?”

“Yes.”

“I look forward to officially welcoming you into the family, then.” Malek claps him on the back and says his farewells to Torek and the others before standing to watch as they start their journey to Eladir.

T
HEY
’
VE
been walking for several hours when Kyr sidles alongside Jerath and falls into step with him and Serim. Ghaneth and Caleb are walking a little in front of them and off to the side, telling Torek all about life as a shifter. Caleb watches Kyr approach Jerath with a curious look, but doesn’t pause in his conversation.

Jerath has managed to avoid Kyr since the rescue, but now it’s only the shifters and a handful of Malek’s men, it’s harder to stay out of his way.

“So….” Kyr looks over at him and smirks. “I see your fangs came in after all, and now you can shift.” Jerath’s hackles rise as Kyr casts a sly glance over at Serim and Ghaneth. “Wonder how that happened?”

Serim glares at Kyr and slips her hand into Jerath’s. “I’m not ashamed, Kyr, nor do I regret it.” Kyr cocks an eyebrow, as though he doesn’t believe her. “I love Jerath, and I am honored to have helped him through his Choosing.”

“What about Ghaneth?” Kyr waves his hand in Ghaneth’s direction. “I’m sure he’s not very happy about the whole thing.”

Kyr is obviously still smarting from being rejected by Serim. It’s common knowledge that Ghaneth has asked her to be his partner for his Choosing ceremony, and that she’s accepted. Jerath explained everything that happened between him and Serim, and Ghaneth understands. The fact that Jerath is now bonded to Meren probably helps.

“I can speak for myself, Kyr.” Ghaneth steps back a little, tugging Serim under his arm, and Jerath grins at the scowl on Kyr’s face. “I have no problem with it.”

Torek turns back to look at them and raises an eyebrow at Jerath. He nods in Kyr’s direction and Jerath just shrugs, not sure he can even explain why Kyr acts the way he does. Torek and Caleb slow their pace so that they fall in line next to Jerath and force Kyr out to the side. Kyr grumbles under his breath, but grudgingly moves over.

“Meren seems to be doing much better now,” Torek says. He nudges Jerath with his shoulder and Jerath grins back at him. He misses Meren already, the ache in his chest a constant reminder of the distance between them, but it’s good to have Torek along for the journey. Someone he can to talk to about Meren.

“Yes, the healers say he should be fully recovered in less than two weeks from now.” Jerath can’t wait. He hates seeing Meren in pain and unable to move around properly.

“I imagine having his mate with him will help with that.” Torek smiles and reaches out and grips Jerath’s shoulder. “I’m glad the two of you worked things out. You’re good for him, Jerath.” Someone shouts Torek’s name from up ahead, so he makes his apologies and leaves to go see what the problem is.

Jerath is still smiling to himself when Kyr calls his name. Serim has just asked Caleb a question, and Caleb shoots Jerath a look of apology as he ducks around him to talk to her, leaving Jerath next to Kyr. There’s no ignoring him now, so Jerath sighs and turns to face him. “What?”

“It’s true, then?” He edges closer, and Jerath sees the smirk on his lips. “I thought it was just a rumor, but you really have mated with a man. I always knew there was something wrong with you.”

Jerath tenses, his hands clenching into fists at his side. But Kyr is on a roll.

“Clearly Serim wasn’t enough to keep you interested in gi—” It’s as far as he gets before Jerath has heard enough. He draws back his fist and drives it home, connecting perfectly with the side of Kyr’s jaw and knocking him on his ass.

Jerath leans over him and hisses through clenched teeth, barely keeping his anger in check. “There’s nothing wrong with
me
, Kyr. Meren is my mate, and I love him.” He stands up straight and tries to calm down. “And what Serim and I shared was a sacred and beautiful rite in the eyes of the Goddess. Do you really dare speak of it like that?”

Kyr is about to open his mouth, but Ghaneth and Caleb are there, gently pushing Jerath over toward Serim. “We’ve got this.” Caleb grins and ushers Jerath away, while he and Ghaneth haul Kyr up and manhandle him a few feet away. Jerath sees them both whispering to him for several minutes before letting him go and walking back over to him and Serim.

“What did you say to him?” Jerath looks between the two of them as they smirk at each other.

“We just explained to him that if he wasn’t careful, we’d make sure none of the girls in Eladir or either of the other villages would agree to be his partner for the Choosing. And no one wants the elders to have to choose for them.”

Serim laughs and mutters something about pitying the poor girl who ends up getting that dubious honor, because in the end someone will have to do it, whether Kyr is Unchosen or not. Jerath just smiles his thanks and rubs at his sore knuckles.

Kyr has nothing more to say after that and falls into a sullen silence. Jerath had hoped this whole experience might have changed him for the better. When they first got back to Meren’s village, Kyr had been quiet and kept to himself, but the closer they get to Eladir, the more the old Kyr seems to surface. Jerath isn’t the least bit surprised none of the girls present will agree to be Kyr’s partner for the Choosing.