The Boy with the Hidden Name (31 page)

Ben’s mother says lightly, “On your end, as well. Don’t

forget, she escaped your prison before she escaped mine.”

My mother ignores her. “But Benedict turned out not to

be the key. It was your father. Your love for your father would

drive you here, and it would keep you here, willingly. And

thus, we would have you, your power, your strength, here in

Avalon, keeping us safe forever.”

But
this
is
all
unnecessary
, I think. They would be safe forever because we don’t know where the other fay is. Because

Ben’s mother hid the other fay from us. Wasn’t that part of

their original plan?

But I don’t say that, because I don’t want to say anything.

“So, in the end,” my mother continues, “we won. Here

you are, alone on Avalon.” My mother’s eyes turn hard upon

me. She is not smiling now. She is the most terrifying I have

ever seen her. “Centuries ago, William Blaxton founded

Parsymeon as a refuge for those who refuse to submit to the

272

BoywiththeHiddenName_INT.indd 272

6/9/14 1:15 PM

The Boy wiTh The hidden name

will of the Courts. Today, Parsymeon falls. Today, we ensure

the harmonious ruling of the Courts, forever.”

My mother and Ben’s mother clink their wineglasses

together. It is a sound like a chiming jingle bell. I sit in dread.

“What is it?” my mother snaps, surprising me, and I realize

she is talking to a small creature who has come bounding up

to us.

“It’s an Urisk!” I exclaim, unable to help myself.

“I am the only Urisk,” he tells me mournfully. “There are

no other Urisks in existence.”

“Yes, yes,” my mother interrupts impatiently. “What have

you come in for?”

The Urisk hesitates, bouncing on the soles of his feet, and

then he leans up and whispers in my mother’s ear.

Her entire expression changes. She lights up. “
Really?
” she drawls. “Well, that is excellent news.” She smiles at the Urisk, and then she says lightly, “Urisk.”

The Urisk gives a little cry and disintegrates on the spot

into dandelion fluff that drifts away through the room.

And the awful thing is that I see it, and it’s horrifying, but

I also feel the burst of power that comes from it, warm, like

sinking into a hot bath. There is a piece of me I can feel

that would bask in that, that understands why the Seelies do

such things, because if I reached out and let myself grab it, it would feel heavenly.

My mother and Ben’s mother both breathe deep and smile,

satisfied, drinking in the little burst of power.

273

BoywiththeHiddenName_INT.indd 273

6/9/14 1:15 PM

Skylar DorSet

“Why did you do that?” I manage to choke out.

My mother looks at me, her hard eyes glittering. “Why

not?” Then she gets to her feet. “Shall we go for a stroll?”

274

BoywiththeHiddenName_INT.indd 274

6/9/14 1:15 PM

w e leave the castle, because I don’t know what else to

do, and anyway I want to get out of that room with

its leftover naming power making me feel itchy. We walk down

steps roughly carved into the cliff until we come to an expanse

of beautiful white sand beach. The waves curl and lick over

the sand, coaxing it into ripples under the weight of the water.

The beach stretches around us in either direction, as far as I

can see, uninterrupted except for a bundle of something a few

hundred feet away from us, noteworthy as the only blemish on

the postcard nature of the scene. I know I should be focused

on it, but I can’t; I am mostly focused on the fact that I have

ruined everything.
Me
. After spending all of this time trying to set the prophecy into motion, I have been the one to destroy it.

My mother strides confidently over the sand to this bundle,

followed by Ben’s mother. I struggle to keep up with them,

keeping my hand firmly in my father’s. Now that I’ve found

him, now that I have effectively given up everything else for

him, I’m not going to let anything take him away from me.

The bundle takes on a shape. It’s a person, I can see that now.

A person sprawled on his or her side, the waves still sliding at BoywiththeHiddenName_INT.indd 275

6/9/14 1:15 PM

Skylar DorSet

their legs. A man, I realize, as we get closer. A man with a tumble of dark, thick curls…I draw to a slow halt, my feet dragging in

the sand, as I stare at the form in the sand. His face is turned away, but I would know him anywhere, of course I would.

Anxious with fear, I drop my father’s hand and dash over

the sand, past Ben’s mother and my mother, dropping to my

knees in the sand beside Ben and pushing him over onto his

back. He is very still, his pale skin tinged with blue, his eye-

lashes stark against his cheekbones.

“Ben,” I say desperately, my mind a panicked maelstrom of

Benedict
Le
Fay
will
betray
you. And then he will die
.

He doesn’t respond.

His jacket is sodden, sticking to his skin with wetness. I tug

clumsily at the zipper, finally forcing it down, and struggle to pull it off of him. He is heavy and limp and reacts not at all

to the poking and prodding and shoving I am doing.

“Ben,” I say again. “Benedict.” I look in dismay at the

soaked shirts he’s still wearing and curl my hand into his.

“Come on, Ben.” I lean my forehead down onto his shoulder.

“Come on,” I whisper.

Ben does not move. He does not breathe.

“Ben,” I beg, and I tell myself that the sound I make is not

a sob.

“Look at that,” I hear my mother drawl behind me. “True

devotion. That’s what that is.”

“I don’t understand,” I say, and I lift my head and shout

at her. “What happened to him? What did you do to him?”

276

BoywiththeHiddenName_INT.indd 276

6/9/14 1:15 PM

The Boy wiTh The hidden name

“
I
didn’t do anything to him. He swam to you, my dear.”

This doesn’t make any sense. “What do you mean? He

knows how to swim?”

“No,” she answers. “Obviously not.”

“Then why did he do it?” I know the answer even before I

ask the question: he did it for me.

My mother must reach the same conclusion— that I already

know the answer— because she doesn’t bother to reply to me.

She walks over and drops a blanket unceremoniously next to

me. I look at it, blinking through my tears, wondering where

it came from. “Dry him off.”

“But— ”

“Get him dry, Selkie. He’ll be fine. And then I can name him.

It’s no fun naming a half- dead faerie. You get barely any charge out of it at all.” She walks away through the sand to the castle.

I look at Ben’s mother, who gazes inscrutably at Ben’s body

on the sand and then turns and follows my mother. I look at

my father for a moment, and then I swipe at my tears and

concentrate on getting Ben dry.

After a bit of struggle, I eventually get Ben out of his soaked

shirts. My father sits in the sand near me, watching and biting

his thumb nail nervously. I can tell that he is concerned for

me, but that he doesn’t understand why or what I am doing.

I consider taking off Ben’s jeans. I had ideas about the first

time I would take off Ben’s jeans. These ideas did not go like

this. I fret about it, and then I decide that I have to save him and I have to get him dry to do it, and the jeans aren’t helping.

277

BoywiththeHiddenName_INT.indd 277

6/9/14 1:15 PM

Skylar DorSet

So I take off his jeans.

Not as easy as it sounds, since the jeans are wet and difficult

to work with. Ben remains unresponsive, but I manage to

get them over his bare feet and toss them aside. I steadfastly

do not gape at the sight of Ben in his underwear, because

now is not the time for such things. Although I look enough

to know that he’s wearing underwear, which is a relief. I

wasn’t sure if faeries believed in such things, and I can barely take the intimacy of seeing Ben’s bare feet, never mind Ben

completely naked.

I spread the blanket over him and rub at him briskly.

When I’ve gotten Ben as dry as I think I can get him, I flip

the blanket over so that the driest side is touching him, and I

lie down next to him and curl my hand into his. And I wait.

She said he wasn’t dead. I have to trust that he’s not dead.

But he stays still and cold next to me, while the sun dips into

the ocean stretched beside us and the stars come out over-

head. Dusk glows around us, and I stare at the rhythm of the

waves as they push and pull at the shore, half mesmerized by

it. I think about the battle in Boston, and whether they’ve

already lost it, and whether everyone has been named.

Ben takes a sudden, deep, shuddering breath beside me and

then rolls over away from me, choking and sputtering. I sit

up in alarm, watching, uncertain what I can do to help, and

eventually he catches his breath and rolls back toward me.

He looks exhausted and unwell, half in twilight shadow, and

I can’t even tell what color his eyes are as they gaze up at me.

278

BoywiththeHiddenName_INT.indd 278

6/9/14 1:15 PM

The Boy wiTh The hidden name

“Selkie Stewart,” he says thickly, as if his tongue is swollen.

“Did that help?” I ask anxiously. “Use my middle name. I’ll

give you both of them.”

He shakes his head against the sand. “It helped.” His voice

does sound clearer. “I’m naked,” he remarks.

I probably blush. “Not quite.”

“Were you taking advantage of me? Because I wanted to be

conscious for that.”

“Shut up,” I tell him. “My father’s here.”

“Your father?” He shifts his head a bit, looking beyond me

to where my father sits in the sand. “Good. Your father. I’m

glad you found him. Is he okay?”

“Yes. He seems to be.”

He looks back at me. “Tell me how you are.”

“I’ve ruined everything,” I blurt out to him. “I’m a fay on

Avalon, and that will fulfill the warring prophecy, the one

that your mother mentioned, about how the Seelie Court

power will be cemented forever— ”

“That’s why I’m here: to help you stop that.”

I shake my head. “It’s too late.”

“Why do you think that? When I left, we were still in the

middle of the battle.”

“But we’ve been here for hours,” I tell him. “It’s nighttime

now. The battle must be over and— ”

“You’re keeping the wrong time,” Ben interrupts me calmly.

“You can still save the battle.”

“How?”

279

BoywiththeHiddenName_INT.indd 279

6/9/14 1:15 PM

Skylar DorSet

“Leave.” Ben says it like it’s so simple.

I blink at him, annoyed now. “
How?
”

“You can leave anytime you like. You’re a Seelie. Seelies can

come and go from Avalon as they please.”

“What about Dad? And you?”

“How do you think they’re going to get you to fulfill their

prophecy and stay?”

I pause, thinking things over, thinking of how I was lured

here in the first place, thinking of my fatal flaw of
loving
too
much
. I look out at the ocean. I think of all the lives I ruined because I wanted to save just one. I wonder how selfish I can

be. I look at Ben. “How do I leave?”

“I have no idea. That’s Seelie knowledge.”

That’s no help at all. I shake my head and tangle my fingers

into my hair. “Your mother’s here,” I tell him.

“I figured. She’s been playing the long game, my mother.

Your mother too.”

“What are we going to do?”

“I have no idea. I don’t really have a plan. Then again, I

usually don’t. I thought it was a faerie trait, but this entire

situation is making me reconsider.”

“My mother said that Parsymeon would fall today.”

“Well, she would, wouldn’t she?” Ben’s gaze has shifted

beyond me again, and I look over my shoulder. Beyond my

father, a figure is approaching. An Urisk.

He hops up to us and peers down at Ben. “Can you walk?”

he asks, a little rudely.

280

BoywiththeHiddenName_INT.indd 280

6/9/14 1:15 PM

The Boy wiTh The hidden name

“Why?” retorts Ben.

“If you can walk, your presence is requested.”

“I bet it is,” mutters Ben and sits up with what I can see is

obvious effort. He even winces a bit.

“We don’t have to go,” I tell him.

“Yes, we do.”

“We could…make a run for it.”

“I can’t run anywhere right now. And, anyway, there’s

nowhere to go. This is an island, and the Seelies control every

inch of it.
You
can go.”

“But I don’t know how to yet.” I look back at the ocean and

wonder if I really should just start swimming. I wonder if the

reason I haven’t tried it is because I really can’t bear to leave Ben and my father behind.

Ben stands up slowly, weaving a bit on his feet, keeping the

blanket wrapped around him. “We’ll go then. I want to see

how this ends, finally.”

“Ben…” My protest is halfhearted. I know, in a way, that

he’s right. All of this time on the beach, this stolen time with him, is just delaying the inevitable.