Authors: Phyllis Halldorson
By this time Shane was sprinting down the hall, closing
the gap between them. Karen turned and ran back toward the nursery. She
had to protect her child! She'd fight with every bit of her strength to
keep him away from her daughter!
Unfortunately, what little strength she had was used up
before she'd gone more than a few steps and the walls began to spin as
the pounding in her ears became a roar, and if it hadn't been for the
strong arms that picked her up and held her against the familiar chest
she would have fallen.
As Shane carried her down the corridor she pounded him
with her fists and screamed, "No! No! I won't let you take my baby! You
can't have her! She's mine!"
Shane must have known which room was hers because he
quickly turned into it as two nurses ran toward them, attracted by
Karen's frantic behavior. They were both yelling at Shane and he turned
and glared at them as he said, "I'm Shane McKittrick and Karen is my
wife. I'm not going to hurt her; I just want to talk to her. Now if you
will please leave I promise we'll call you if we need you."
They looked at Karen, who by this time was completely
exhausted and lay quietly in Shane's arms. He looked grim but when he
spoke again it was a soft appeal.
"Please. We've had a misunderstanding that has to be
straightened out. We need a few minutes alone to talk."
The well-known McKittrick charm worked and the nurses
smiled as they turned and walked out of the room, shutting the door
behind them.
Shane sat down in the big armchair and cradled her on his
lap. She knew she was beaten. She's used up all her reserves and she
couldn't fight him anymore. Her tears came in great wrenching sobs as
he rocked her back and forth in his arms. His lips caressed her hair
and he was murmuring something to her but she couldn't hear above her
wailing.
She was curled up on his lap crying as if her heart would
break and his voice was torn with emotion as he said, "Karen, darling,
don't cry so hard. You're killing me by inches, do you know that?"
Karen swallowed a sob and looked up at him through pools
of tears. He'd aged in the week since she'd last seen him. But how was
that possible? He looked older, tired, his face gray and lined. His
hair, always immaculately styled, was disheveled and the torment in his
eyes matched the torment she saw in her own whenever she looked in a
mirror. He'd suffered as much as she had. She'd known he'd be enraged
over her leaving but she hadn't realized, that he'd be this concerned
about the baby. Any hope she'd had that he might relent and let her
raise the child was dashed. He obviously didn't trust her to care for
it properly or he wouldn't have suffered so when he thought she'd taken
it from him. Well, this was one time she wasn't going to give in to him.
She buried her face in his shoulder and shuddered as she
said, "Shane, I'll fight you with every weapon I can find. I'll be a
good mother; I'll never allow Audrey to raise my daughter."
He stroked her hair. "Of course you won't. Neither would
I. Nobody's going to raise our daughter but her parents—you
and me, Karen."
She raised her head, startled. "But Audrey said—"
Shane's face hardened. "I know what Audrey said and I
probably would have killed her for it if I hadn't been so desperate to
find you."
"What!" Karen shrieked.
He pulled her close and guided her head back to his
shoulder. "I'd gone into Carmel on business that morning and when I got
home and found your note I went nearly out of my mind. I didn't know
what you were talking about but I knew Audrey must have said something
awful to drive you away like that and I went looking for her." He
shivered. "It will be a cold day in hell before she forgets that
encounter! I didn't take long to get the truth out of her and when she
finished telling me…"
Karen sat up again, her eyes wide. "Shane?"
The look on his face softened and he rubbed the tears from
her eyes with his thumb. "My precious darling, don't you know even yet
how much I love you?"
She gasped. "L-love me?"
"Adore you, worship you. There isn't a word strong enough
for the way I feel about you, Karen. I've loved you ever since I first saw you but I've
fought it every step of the way. I was Shane McKittrick, the
invincible. No woman was ever going to mean anything to me. I would
never be hurt by a woman the way my father was!"
For the first time he smiled. "Then you came along and
walked right into my heart and I didn't have a chance. I tried every
way I knew to dislodge you. I stayed away from you, spent most of my
time in San Francisco, and missed you so much I couldn't stand it. I
tried to send you away and wound up in the hospital with a broken head
and a need for you that was frightening. I moved you out of my bed and
then paced the floor in agony every night."
His voice broke and he gathered her to him as his seeking
mouth covered hers. Karen was lightheaded with joy and confusion. Had
he really said he loved her? He'd never said that
before—ever. His actions often told her that his feelings for
her were deeper than he would admit, but he'd never told her that he
loved her—not even in their most intimate moments.
She wound her arms around his neck and held him as their
kiss plumbed the depth of their love. Shane groaned and buried his face
in the soft hollow of her neck beneath her ear as he whispered, "Don't
ever leave me again, little one! Don't even go shopping or for a walk
without telling me where you're going and when you'll be back. I
couldn't survive another week like this one. Hell would have been a
vacation compared to what I've been through!"
She held his head against her and stroked her fingers
through his hair as she murmured, "I'm sorry, darling, but Audrey was
so convincing, and Shane, I did see her in your arms that night."
Shane shuddered and held her tighter. "Oh, Karen, if you'd
only come in that room a minute earlier or a minute later none of this
would have happened. I wasn't making love to Audrey; she tripped and
started to fall and I caught her. You must have come in during the
second or so it took to steady her. If you'd only said
something—shouted at me, anything—I could have
explained. As it was, I didn't even know you'd been there until I
forced it out of Audrey."
Karen winced. "She said you wanted to marry her but that
she couldn't have children—that it was her idea to advertise
for a woman to give you a child."
Shane took her face in his hands and looked deep into her
green eyes. "Karen, I swear to you I never had any intention of
marrying Audrey. I never intended to marry anyone until you came along
and started tormenting me without even meaning to. Audrey was simply a
diversion, as many other women have been. I'm thirty-two years old,
sweetheart, and I'm not a monk."
"What I told you about the newspaper ad was true. Mark and
I were the only ones who knew about it. Audrey learned about it from
Mrs. Whitney, who had been listening at keyholes and told her."
"Mrs. Whitney!" Karen screeched in disbelief. "But she's
always been the perfect housekeeper! Why would she do a thing like
that?"
Shane's mouth twisted with disgust. "Because Audrey was
paying her to discourage beautiful women from taking an interest in me.
Audrey had apparently decided that she wanted to be Mrs. Shane
McKittrick, and what Audrey wants Audrey usually gets. I finally found
out that's why Mrs. Whitney put you in the servants' quarters when you
first came. She knew she'd better keep you out of my way if she didn't
want me distracted. Then I found out about it and threatened to fire
her and she's hated you ever since. She was only too happy to take
revenge that way."
Karen shivered. "How awful!"
Shane shrugged. "I had to restrain myself to keep from
throwing her out bodily. I gave her an hour to pack and leave and told
her that if she made any more trouble I'd see to it that she never
worked anywhere again. As for Audrey, someone said she's gone to
Europe." His voice was grim. "If she's smart she'll stay there!"
Without warning the door opened and a nurse appeared with
a small pink bundle in her arms. She grinned and said, "I have a little
one here who's been screaming for her dinner. You'd better help her,
Mama, before Miss McKittrick starves to death."
Karen wiggled off Shane's lap and took off her robe, then
climbed onto the bed. The nurse raised it to a sitting position and
handed Karen the fussing bundle. The nurse left and Karen motioned
Shane to sit on the side of the bed. His eyes took in all the details
of the dark-haired little girl and Karen smiled as she said, "What do
you think of your daughter?"
He put out a finger and touched her almost reverently.
"Does she have a name?"
"Of course," Karen answered. "Since we were going to call
the baby Shane Alexander, Jr., if it was a boy, I named her Shanna
Alexandria. It was the closest I could get."
Shane said nothing but continued to watch the nursing
child. His expression was unreadable and Karen felt uneasy. There was
one question she had to ask.
"Shane, are you terribly disappointed that she wasn't a
boy?"
Shane looked up, surprised. "Why on earth should I be
disappointed. She's a beautiful baby. Someday she may be almost as
special as her mother." He took Karen's hand and kissed it, then held
it to his cheek.
Her fingers caressed his face as she murmured, "But you
wanted a son—an heir, to carry on the business."
He grinned. "Mrs. McKittrick, what makes you think a woman
can't head a business just as efficiently as a man?"
Karen laughed and leaned over to kiss him, unwittingly
dislodging the baby's dinner. Shanna screamed in protest and Shane
rolled his eyes heavenward in mock horror.
"My stars, woman, quit messing around and feed the poor
child! It's easy to see that she has an appetite like her mother's."
When Shanna was finally satisfied and fell asleep, the
nurse came and carried her back to her crib. Shane adjusted the bed so
Karen was lying flat, then took off his shoes and lay down beside her.
He took her in his arms and held her full-length against him as he
said, "We got in all kinds of trouble in the hospital in Santa Cruz for
lying on the bed together, but I can't be in the same room with you and
not hold you."
His lips caressed her face and when he spoke again there
was a throb in his voice. "Can you ever forgive me for driving you
away, making you go through the experience of giving birth to our child
alone before I would admit that I love you and want you with me always?
I've been such a blind, self-centered fool! I went through hell to
protect myself from something I know now would never have happened. I
wouldn't grow up and admit that my mother was the exception, not the
rule."
He drew her closer and his lips trailed kisses down the
side of her neck as he murmured, "Oh, Karen, I love you so!"
She snuggled against him and stroked his nape and back,
letting her body tell him of her love. He kissed her gently but with a
suppressed hunger and said, "I told you once that I wasn't sure I could
live without you. Well, my darling, now I know for sure that I can't.
Karen, will you come home with me and be my wife, for as long as we
both shall live?"
Karen could only nod, her throat too choked with emotion
to speak. But she knew Shane could see the joy shining from her face.
Those were the words she'd waited so long to hear! She turned to him,
her eyes glowing with the love they shared.