Tahn (18 page)
Suddenly he could not contain himself. Tears blurred his vision, and he was shaking even more fiercely. He knew he could not stay in the saddle. So he tumbled down to his knees and wept beneath the open sky.
“Lord God!” he cried. “Would you forgive me? Could you indeed?”
He could not have stood to his feet then if he’d tried. The pain of his soul seemed to be floating away with the water beside him. He had never cried this way. He had never felt such a release of the torment inside him. It was not the blood of a thousand dark nights that God chose to see, but the blood of his Son, breaking the hold of hell forever.
“Will you have me, Jesus?” he stammered. “Have you such a mercy? I don’t deserve it, Lord God! I thought I could never know what your love is like. You’ve a right to hate me, I know that! Would you give me your mercy? I don’t understand, Lord, but I want it more than life. Forgive me! Please forgive me! I have been the servant of Samis and Satan, but Lord, let me be your servant instead. I shall be indebted forever for such a Master—such a mercy!”
He could not continue for a moment, the tears so overwhelmed him. And when he finally could speak again, it was with a peace he had never known. “Help me, Lord,” he said. “I want to be in your hands to use now. You could have turned me away. But I thank you, God! I never thought I would be loved. I never thought you would give me a moment’s mercy. Lord, I thank you! You have freed me from the terror that held me. I know it, as surely as I live!”
He lay on his face, and suddenly he was laughing the spontaneous laugh of a soul set free. There would be no more nightmares. There would be no more hopeless dread. There could be peace.
He was on his feet before he knew it, leaping and shouting. He had never known this kind of joyous excitement, not even as a child. He jumped about on the rocks, leaped over a bush, and then stood laughing with his arms extended and his face toward the sky. Such a weight was lifted! Who knew how light a man could feel?
He stood there for the longest time, drinking in the first joy he’d ever known. When he finally looked around him, the world looked new and somehow crystal clear.
I will never be the same,
he realized.
Nothing will ever be the same.
Smoke stood patiently, watching him.
“Thank you, Lord!” Tahn cried out.
I need to tell them,
he thought immediately.
I need to tell Vari what has happened to me.
“Smoke,” he said. “They will not know what to say. Who could have thought Tahn Dorn could ever be happy like this?”
He bent to drink from the stream. Such beautiful, Godgiven water. He dunked his head into it and came up shaking the wetness from his long hair. “Smoke,” he said. “God is good. Can you believe it? He has saved me! Do you understand?”
He drank again, but this time, he began to feel an odd tingling in his spine. Something was wrong; he knew it. It was as though a voice was suddenly shouting inside of him, “Get out of here!” He stood and looked at the hill beyond him.
There, standing tall in the moonlight, was a black-garbed dark angel, sword in hand.
“Come on, Smoke,” Tahn said and mounted quickly. He knew he’d been seen. But thanks be to God that the Lady and the children weren’t with him.
Knowing he’d be followed, he rode into the cover of trees, away from the direction of the cave.
The man won’t be alone,
Tahn was thinking.
And I can’t lead them to the others. God be with the little ones! God protect them and provide for them, because now there can be no going home.
I
t worried Netta that Tahn was not back before the children woke. That was almost a routine for him. After breakfast, she led the children in prayer and began another lesson. But she was distracted by her worry. And she wasn’t the only one.
“Do you think the Dorn was upset with us last night?” Stuva asked.
“No,” Netta answered. “He had to think. Sometimes that’s very important.”
“What did he have to think about?” Temas asked.
“About God, dear child. And his love for us.”
“Are you sure?” Stuva asked skeptically. “He didn’t look too happy with all your Jesus talk.”
“It’s kind of hard to tell,” Doogan told him.
“I don’t understand him,” little Rane admitted. “I can’t tell if he’s mad or not.”
“He’s just the Dorn, that’s all,” Briant explained.
“Don’t worry about it,” Vari told them. “He’ll be back with a bagful of something soon enough. Let’s get done and go fishing.”
But Tahn didn’t come back. When fish were caught and the day was old, still he didn’t come. Netta got the children to sleep that night with no answer to Temas’s timid question. “When is Teacher coming home?”
In the wilderness to the northwest, Samis camped with a group of his men. He had hired a tracker, but Tahn was slippery. He stayed ahead of them and out of sight.
If it is possible,
Samis thought,
I have taught him too well. But he has a fatal flaw that did not come from me.
“It’s just a matter of time,” said a tall mercenary at his master’s side. “He will have to rest, and then we will cut him down with our swords.”
“No,” Samis maintained. “You will not catch him that way. Even if you do get close enough.”
The slender soldier scowled, insulted by his leader’s assessment. “You know I am a match for him, Lord,” he said. “More than a match.”
“You deceive yourself,” Samis told him. “We need only the proper bait.”
“What bait will draw the Dorn?”
Samis did not take long in explaining. “He likes children,” he said. “We will give him one. Go get me a child. I don’t care where and I don’t care its age, so long as it can scream like a demon.”
The following night, Tahn and Smoke reached Pearl Mountain east of Tamask. He knew he was still being followed. And that someone was tracking very well.
“I’m glad you’re with me in this, Lord,” he said. “I don’t know why my life continues, but I know now that it’s not mine to take.”
He stopped beside a stream. “We’ll have to rest, Smoke,” he said and silently dismounted.
He thought of Stuva, Temas, and the others. He knew that with God’s help, surely Vari and the lady would do well for the little ones. He could trust for that. But he was sorry he could not share it. “God, I pray for Netta Trilett to find a husband like herself,” he said, “strong in faith and kindness. For Vari, the life he has dreamed of, to marry a girl and raise strong children off the bounty of the land. For Temas, Lord, the mother she longs for. And for the boys, the chance to become men of honor and honest means. For all of them, God, I pray a life of safety.”
He drank of the cool stream. “Let the wrath of Samis be spent in his pursuit of me,” he prayed, “that he forget the children. Lord, let him never murder another soul!” He looked down at his own hands and shook his head in dismay. “Help me, God! Help me, that I not spill blood again.”
Smoke had wandered off in his grazing, and Tahn sought out a secluded spot in the bushes to try to get some sleep.
It is strange,
he thought.
Now that there is peace in dying, I don’t wish to. I would rather that you make a way, Lord, that I can go back to them.
In the morning, he crawled to the stream to drink again. He was hungry, but he was so used to the feeling that it was easy to ignore. He had never slept so well in all his life, and he felt strangely happy despite the precarious circumstances.
He was about to leave when a scream suddenly broke across the quiet valley. Tahn stood and whistled softly. “Smoke,” he said. “You be ready, boy.”
He mounted quickly and began to ride away from the sound, but it came again, followed immediately by another scream, louder.
“That sounds like a child,” he said with a sigh. He knew such screams from his years with Samis. Somewhere not far away there would be a terrified child, perhaps hurt. Someone should take pity and respond to those cries.
Another scream rose in the distance behind him. He knew he was still being hunted. The mercenaries on his trail might even be the cause of those screams. It would not be unlike them. But even so, he should help.
“Have a mercy for the little one, Lord,” he said and turned his horse toward the sound.
Marc Toddin prided himself on being the best at what he did, and he didn’t mind being paid well to help catch a killer. He rather enjoyed it. But this with a child, this was different.
He went to broach the subject with Samis, but before he could say a word, the older man said, “We will not need your services any further, Toddin. You may as well go home.”
“But what about the girl?” he asked.
“That is not your concern,” Samis told him, his eyes narrowing.
Toddin looked long at him and knew better than to say anything more. He had been told the man was an expert with a sword.
But Toddin was not a man to ride off and leave a girl’s screams behind him. He had three daughters. What sort of a person would kidnap a girl? Even for such a purpose? It made the hunter worse than the hunted.
He left Samis and went to his horse. One of the young mercenaries was standing nearby. “On your way?” he asked.
“Yes,” Toddin told him reluctantly. “Samis tells me you won’t be needing a tracker anymore.”
“I hope he’s right,” the soldier said. “He thinks the Dorn will just come to us now. I’m not so sure. Seems foolish to me.”
Toddin had been considering the same thing. Much as he’d like to, he didn’t know how to get the girl away from the armed men. Why would a killer like Tahn Dorn take such a chance?
“When you are all finished with your sport,” Toddin asked, “what will you do with the girl?”
“I hope we take her with us,” the young man replied. “It’s been a while since we had a girl up there.”
Toddin frowned, but he mounted his horse without a word lest he betray his anger. He didn’t know what could be done, but he couldn’t just trot off and forget about it. Who were these men who had no more care than this for an innocent child? And why would a killer care if someone screamed? He’d been deceived. If Samis could be so sure his prey would come to them for the sake of the girl, then he hunted a man far better than himself. Angry inside, Toddin rode quickly away. He could do nothing against so many men. He left the mercenary camp behind him, but he knew he wouldn’t be able to turn his horse for home.