“I can’t let G go down for a crime he didn’t commit. You don’t know him like I do,” Mickey says, stating the obvious. “No matter what others may think of him he’s been good to me.”
“Mickey, do you want to go to jail, too? Seriously Mickey, think about what you’re about to do before you do it for a change,” I say. “This isn’t a joke nor is it the time to prove how ride or die you are for your ex boo.”
I look past Mickey and down at my goddaughter who’s sound asleep in her stroller at the bottom of the porch steps. Why wouldn’t she sleep well when I’m around—Nickey Shantae knows I’ve got her back even when her mama acts like a damned fool.
“Why the hell shouldn’t I have G’s back?” Mickey says, defensively. “He had me and Nickey when she was first born and still does, unlike your punk ass friend Nigel, who swore to be there for us no matter what.”
“Mickey, I know your upset with Nigel but this is not the way to go.”
“In case you haven’t noticed, I’m Nickey’s Mama, not you,” Mickey says. “I make the decisions for her, starting with who will take care of us.”
This girl’s tripping harder than I thought if she thinks G’s a good choice for baby-daddy number three.
“Mickey, you can’t be serious,” I say, trying not to get too loud. “He’s in jail. Granted, he’s not guilty of this crime but he did kill Tre while attempting to kill Nigel.” I know Mickey doesn’t want to hear it again, but let’s not forget the facts.
“You know that was an accident,” Mickey says, spitting she’s so mad. “He didn’t mean to kill his own boy, Jayd. And it was Tre who stepped in the line of fire, not the other way around.”
“Mickey, do you hear yourself talking? Are you saying that it’s your actual baby-daddy’s fault for protecting Nigel from your crazy ex-boyfriend? That’s some bull Mickey, and you have to know it,” I yell, damn the white clothing. This trick must be told. “Not to mention the fact that G wrote you cryptic, sick letters about being the whore of Babylon. A few weeks ago you were asking me to concoct a potion to get him off your ass and now you’re anxious to give it back to him. What the hell, Mickey?”
“What the hell is that I’m not going back to my mama’s house, Jayd; I can’t. G’s family has been letting me stay with them. As soon as he’s out we’re going to find a place together,” she says, finally confessing her true intentions. “He said we could live in the same complex as his relatives. That way Nickey will grow up around her cousins.”
“What cousins, Mickey? Nickey’s aunties and cousin live across the street from me, or have you forgotten about Tre’s sisters, Brandy and Lydia?” I ask, pointing to my left. “You can’t just switch the baby-daddies any time you feel like it. Nigel Esop is Nickey Shantae Esop’s legal father and is invested in her well-being.”
Mickey starts to cry and so does Nickey. I walk down the steps and pick up my godbaby.
“And so am I. Why do you think I’m breaking my back trying to make sure we have a place of our own and a man around who’ll take care of us? Me being a single mama was never a part of the deal.”
“Mickey, you can have all of those things but you have to do it the right way,” I say, rocking the baby back to sleep. “What about Nickey? She’s already attached to her daddy.”
“She’ll be attached to whoever I tell her to be attached to. I keep telling you I’m Nickey’s mother, not you.”
“Well then start acting like it by making wise decisions instead of letting your selfish emotions rule your movements. For real, Mickey. Grow the hell up.”
“You know what, Jayd? You’re the one who needs to grow the hell up. You’ve never had sex yet you’re running around here telling everyone what to do with their babies and lovers,” she says, stepping onto the front porch steps. “You don’t know what the hell you’re talking about. Shut up with all of that fantasy bull, Jayd, get a man and have a little baby of your own since you want to be somebody’s mama so bad. Then you can tell me what to do with my own.”
Mickey picks up Nickey’s diaper bag and reaches for a sleeping Nickey who’s safe and sound in my arms. I hate to give her up but Mickey’s right. I’m not Nickey’s mama no matter how much I care. Mickey can be such a bitch sometimes. This is when I would normally call Nellie to reason with her girl but I can’t even do that because Nellie’s on one herself.
“Jayd, ride with your uncle Bryan to the beach. Our truck’s full,” Netta yells from the backyard.
It’s time to go. Why the hell did Mickey have to drop this in my lap today of all days? I’ll talk to Nigel as soon as I can before he does something rash in response to Mickey’s latest stunt. The rest of the afternoon belongs to Pam.
*
I step closer to the river’s shore, washing my feet in the cool water. Accidentally puncturing my big toe on a buried fishhook in the sand, the blood trickles into the water.
“Damn it,” I say under my breath, rubbing the sore toe. I take the hook and line out of the freshwater and rinse my toe.
“Jayd, is that you?” I hear a voice ask. I look into the dark water and see no one.
“Jayd, I’m down here,” the voice calls again.
I walk into the water knowing it doesn’t go that deep because I’ve been in this river many times before. Almost to the center, I follow the voice confidently until the sandy bed beneath me drops and I go under.
“Open your eyes!” Queen Califia screams into my head. “Your sight will light the way.”
I follow her directions, able to see underwater. I’m still afraid and rightfully so: The woman’s voice is directly behind me and very familiar.
“Jayd, I knew you’d rescue me, you and your Mama,” the red-bellied fish says.
I can tell by the way she’s looking at me that it’s Pam’s spirit. The fish looks frail and confused, much like Pam as I remember her. She smiles sinisterly, her eyes growing vacant and I realize that like Lexi, Pam’s taken a turn for the worst. I try to swim away but the Piranha follows, growing swifter by the second. I’m not of much of a swimmer and the hungry sea life easily catches up to me and snaps at my bare heels.
“Back up, Jaws!” I scream, kicking the fish as hard as I can but it’s no use. The water is her territory, not mine. She’s using her home court advantage for all it’s worth.
“You should know better than to bite the hand that feeds you,” Mama says from above, reaching her hands through the water and saving me. When my grandmother pulls me up, Pam’s new host body follows, catapulting from the water.
“I need your blood to survive!” Pam screams, attempting to take a bite out of my ass but Mama’s not having it.
“I hate to hurt you chile, but you’re not yourself anymore. Please forgive me, Lord.”
Mama takes a large staff and stares at it with all her might. The staff begins to glow, causing it to become energized with Mama’s powers. She raises the stick above her head and lunges it into the water, electrocuting the fish.
“Jayd, are you okay?” my grandmother asks.
“Yes, I think so,” I say, checking my limbs to make sure.
“You have to be careful what you cast out into the water and with the bait you use. You’re liable to attract the wrong thing,” Mama says as Pam’s lifeless fish body rises to the top.
The water beneath it begins to bubble as hundreds of tiny fish surround Pam. Esmeralda appears on the other side of the river and casts a net, pulling them all toward her.
“Pam!” I scream, sitting straight up in Daddy’s Cadillac. The sun is shining brightly through the windshield, momentarily blinding me. I must’ve dozed off on the way to the Marina.
“What’s up with you?” Bryan asks, focusing on the funeral procession we’re a part of. “You’re acting like a crackhead—no disrespect intended.”
“Shut up, Bryan,” I say as I attempt to get my bearings. “I have proof that Esmeralda’s behind this debauchery, but it’s not the kind of proof I can take to the cops,” I say, only half-awake. My head’s spinning causing me to feel a bit drowsy. Maybe there’s a coffee vendor on the boardwalk. I need a quick jolt.
“Why are you whispering, Jayd? This ain’t
Law and Order
,” Bryan says, still joking about my situation.
“Bryan, I’m serious,” I say, pinching his arm. “I know how Esmeralda killed Pam and how she’s taking over using one follower at a time. All I need is a few fish nets and we’ve got her.” Wait, that didn’t sound right. I think I’m confusing my dream with reality, but he doesn’t need to know that.
“Why are you telling me this stuff? This is Mama’s territory not mine,” Bryan says, covering his nose as if to say my breath stinks. My uncle can be such a pest some times.
I need to get a message to Mama without tipping Esmeralda and her brood off, but how? Daddy’s entire congregation and a few other neighbors came to see Pam’s ashes off, and for the free food afterwards no doubt. We made enough to feed the entire neighborhood twice over not to mention what the church folks will serve at the repast.
“Let’s go everyone,” Daddy says, helping Mama out of Netta’s truck. It’s cute to see them ride together, even if I know Mama doesn’t like to sit in the middle. We’re all parked along the metered parking area in the quiet seaside neighborhood.
There’s a perfect opening and rock path leading out onto the water. I look at Mama follow her husband and best friend to join the crowd. Once near the water, the fifty-plus participants gather in a circle and light their candles to join in a silent prayer. I catch Mama’s eyes and focus on telling her what I need for her to know. My head becomes cool and without knowing how, my mom’s sight takes over but I hesitate before entering Mama’s head.
“
Didn’t you learn anything from your vision quest last night
?” my mom says into my mind.
“Let your mind go free and focus on your intention. The sight will come; I promise.”
“
Easy for you to say
,” I think back, staring at my grandmother holding my grandfather’s hand. One good thing that’s come out of this tragedy is that my grandparents seem closer than ever before.
“
Jayd, focus. You can tell Mama everything she needs to know without speaking a word. Simply think about it
,” my mom says, checking out and letting me do my thing. Esmeralda and her brood stand on the far side of the large circle. She looks younger with every passing day, a side effect of borrowing people’s souls I suppose.
“
Mama, it’s Esmeralda. She’s using the same potion she used on Mickey after she first had the baby
,” I say. That’s when Mama and Netta were on their summer adventure down south. Mickey was acting all kinds of crazy, kind of like the bull she served up a little while ago.
“Esmeralda switched the souls of her followers with the souls of her evil animal farm. If we can somehow get our hands on her creatures we should be able to free her victims
.”
“
At last, a solution
,” Mama thinks back.
“If that’s what it takes then that’s what we’ll have to do
.
”
I can tell she’s a bit taken aback that I figured out how to use my mom’s powers at will, but it feels natural just like it did when they first came to me last year. I didn’t know how to handle it then but now it’s like riding a bike, and it feels good.
“
It’s not as easy as it seems. Esmeralda’s already made a connection with her prey through the chosen animals
,” I mentally impart. She has enough animals living on her property that the city should reclassify it as a zoo.
“
I know it’s like finding a needle in a haystack but we have to find those pets and win their minds back over to our side
,” Mama says, like she’s a pet whisperer.
“
And what if we can’t win them back? Esmeralda’s already turned Lexi against us once and she’s the most loyal dog ever
,” I say, shuddering at the memory. Lexi’s still depressed about hurting Mama, poor thing.
“Then we’ll have to take more drastic measures.”
Mama’s eyes shine brightly in the candlelight adding to their intense hue.
“We’ll deal with Esmeralda later. She won’t see us coming and that’s just how I want it.”
By the tone in her mental voice I’d say Mama’s ready to go wild on Esmeralda’s ass, but in this moment she needs to concentrate her energy on the task at-hand. We return our focus to the ceremony where Daddy’s wrapping up the end of his prayer. Mama and Netta will lead us in song before Mama has the last word.
“Sister Pam’s spirit is finally free to rest in peace,” Mama prays over the golden urn. “May God grant her serenity and mercy on the next leg of her journey.”
Daddy releases her ashes into the ocean, which causes trained church members to wail and gangsters to pour out a little liquor. Mama, Netta and I praise Pam’s energy as the gray dust spreads across the blue water before disappearing into the waves. We will vindicate her life, even in death.
EPILOGUE
Now that Pam’s been laid to rest things should calm down around the neighborhood, which will make it easier for Mama and I to do our jobs. Sometimes the neighborhood watch focuses on the wrong people. We need peace and quiet to catch the criminals on our list and no witnesses if we can help it.
“Do you need a ride home?” Keenan asks as we join the procession away from the water. I still can’t believe he came to the service. We barely spoke the entire time but he’s proven himself to be a good friend and possible boyfriend material. Jeremy and I have so much to work out I can’t even imagine jumping into anything new, but this brotha makes it a tempting idea.