Jason started the car and pushed the button to roll up the window, nearly trapping Tim’s nose in the process. Then he drove carefully down the drive, keeping his speed at an absolute minimum. Only when he reached the main road did he grin, push the gas pedal down hard, and gun his way toward Austin.
* * * * *
By the time Jason returned, Ben was already back. Not too surprising since Jason had been gone for hours. After the job interview, he drove around Austin, trying to get a feel for the city. Parts of it could have been Houston. The same chain restaurants, the same major retailers, but downtown Austin was something completely different, full of weird little shops and diners he was eager to check out. He browsed a few stores, but without any money to spend, he tired of this and settled for people-watching in a park.
Now he was home again and standing in the living room, but Jason’s lips would remain sealed until Tim came back inside.
“He’s out front checking on the car, isn’t he?” Ben asked from one of the cozy corner chairs. He shook his head and smiled. “So how’d it go? You can tell me that much at least.”
“Nope!”
Ben made a pouty face before flipping through a few more pages of the magazine he was reading. Jason noticed it was the gay one. “I’m looking for Tim,” Ben explained. “He did some modeling years ago, and occasionally he’ll pop up in an ad for an escort service or something. Gets upset every time it happens, but it’s not like he’s nude.”
Jason moved behind the chair to look over his shoulder until Tim came back inside.
Once he did, Tim exhaled as if disaster had been narrowly avoided and nodded. “She’s okay.”
“Thank goodness for that!” Ben said sarcastically. “Now then, tell us—”
“I got the job!” Jason blurted out.
“Already?” Tim asked. “Don’t they usually call you back later?”
“They were desperate,” Jason said. “I start tomorrow. The really good news is that I’m working at a pet store and get an employee discount. I can use it to help you save money until I start paying rent.”
“Congrats, man!” Tim said.
“Yeah, congratulations,” Ben said, “but you don’t need to worry about rent.”
“Of course I do,” Jason said, plopping down in the chair next to his and throwing a leg over one arm. “I’m not here to mooch.”
“No,” Ben said, “but you
are
here to get back on your feet, and that includes planning your future.”
“Uh-oh,” Tim said, heading for the kitchen. “Benjamin’s on the warpath! Better give in, kiddo, because he always knows what’s best for everyone.”
Ben grinned shamelessly. “The reason I don’t want you paying rent or bills is so you can save money. Have you thought of going to college?”
“Oh. Actually I dropped out of high school.”
“That’s okay,” Ben said. “Did you get your GED?”
Jason nodded.
“Well, there you go. Nothing’s holding you back. What do you want to be when you grow up?”
“You mean like a real profession?” Jason said. “No idea. I’ve never known.”
“Perfect!” Ben said, sounding satisfied. “College is
made
for people who don’t know what they want to do.”
Jason grimaced. “I really don’t think college is for me.”
“Okay,” Ben said. “Just think about it a little, that’s all I’m asking. Now, my other big idea is right here.”
Ben opened the newspaper and pointed to an ad. Jason took the paper and read it.
Lonely, lost, and looking for fun? Gay youth meeting, every Sunday at All Souls Unitarian Church.
Jason looked up. “Gay youth? I’m eighteen.”
“Which sounds awfully young to old people like me,” Ben said. “I called the number and asked about that. The meetings are for anyone under twenty-one.”
“Oh.”
“Might be a way of meeting that dream guy. Unless you saw someone adorable and gay stocking the dog food aisle today.”
Jason smiled. “I did just happen to scope out my coworkers, and they’re mostly women.”
“So what do you think?” Ben pressed. “Just imagine a whole room full of young gay people also looking to fall in love. You’ll probably get mobbed when you show up.”
“Can you go with me?” Jason asked.
“I’m a little older than twenty-one!”
“How much older?” Jason asked with a grin.
Ben squirmed in his seat. “I’m still in my twenties.”
Tim chose that moment to return. “Keep saying that while you still can, Benjamin. The months are counting down!”
Ben slumped in his chair. “Thirty,” he sighed. “It’s all down hill from there.”
“Not when you’ve got me getting old with you,” Tim said, swooping in to kiss Ben on the neck.
From the floor, Chinchilla grumbled and met Jason’s eye. Yup, time for them to make themselves scarce again!
* * * * *
“So what do you think?”
This was a big question to answer, which is probably why Emma remained uncharacteristically silent on the other end of the phone, allowing Jason to come up with a response.
“Ben is awesome, obviously. The house is great, although I wish it was closer to Austin. Let’s see… Samson is cute, and I’m in love with Chinchilla. So, yeah. I’m happy.”
“Hm,” Emma replied.
“Hm?” Jason echoed.
“You didn’t mention Tim,” Emma said. “No breakthroughs there?”
“Tim is…” Jason paced his bedroom, trying to find the right word and came up with one that summed him up completely. “Complicated.”
Emma laughed as if she understood, but then asked, “How so?”
“He’s super-hot, so I get uncomfortable when I’m around him. I mean, I don’t want to hook up with him or anything, but still. Half the time he seems self-centered, the other half it’s like he lives solely for Ben. That’s it, actually. Even when Tim is nice, I get the feeling that he only wants to be alone with Ben.”
“That’s because you’ve invaded their love nest,” Emma said knowingly. “Why do you think they live in the middle of nowhere? They have this weird thing about being alone together. Tim tried to explain it once. I don’t get it, but I still envy them.”
“Yeah,” Jason said. “Makes me eager to get my own place so I’m not bothering them anymore.”
“No way!” Emma said this with such enthusiasm that Jason had to pull the phone away from his ear. “They
need
you there. They can’t live their whole lives in solitude. Whenever I come to stay, they always say how much life I bring to the house. Ok, so maybe they don’t actually say that, but I can tell it’s good for them. Ben doesn’t look happy when you’re around?”
Jason switched the phone to his other ear. “I guess so. I think he likes me, so hopefully.”
“I know he does,” Emma said with her usual self-assuredness. “Tim just takes a while to warm up to new ideas. He used to look at me like I had three heads.”
Jason laughed. “We’ll see. I won’t be moving out any time soon, even with the new job. Hey, speaking of which, Ben found an ad for a gay youth group. He thinks I should go.”
“Do it!” Emma said instantly.
“I don’t know,” Jason said. “I hate that first-day-of-school feeling where everyone else is already friends with each other.”
“Want me to go with you?”
“Yeah,” Jason said without hesitation. “Too bad you’re so far away.”
“When is it?”
“This coming Sunday.”
“Wow.” Emma sighed. “A gay youth meeting… I so want to go! Maybe I can get Mom to drop me off on Saturday for a sleepover. Especially if Uncle Ben or Tim will drive me back the next day.”
Jason sat up. “I could drive you back after the meeting. If they’ll let me borrow a car.”
“They will!” Emma said. “I’m totally sure! Hold on.”
The phone on the other end rustled and went still. Jason strained to hear what was happening, tried to picture Michelle’s home and what she was doing when not walking around with a manila folder in her hand, trying to save kids. He was wondering if he should hang up and let Emma call him back when he heard her voice in the distance.
“Yes!” A few seconds later and her voice was louder in the receiver. “They said yes! Sleepover!”
Jason felt he was too old for sleepovers, and probably too old to be friends with a fourteen-year-old, but he smiled anyway because he was happy Emma was coming to visit.
They stood in a parking lot, eyeing the church in front of them. Jason’s stomach was full of so many butterflies that if he burped, multicolored wings would probably come flying out. He glanced over at Emma, whose eyebrows were raised like the building wasn’t good enough for her. He resisted the urge to grab her hand, but only just.
Emma glanced over at him. “Nervous?”
“Yeah,” he admitted.
Emma nodded. “Me too.”
“Really? But you seem so—”
“Calm and collected? I’m an overweight junior high student who hasn’t done anything more than kiss another girl on the cheek. I’ve never met another lesbian in my life, as far as I know, and I have absolutely no idea what to expect. The confidence thing? That’s called attitude and it’s my armor.”
“Well, it works,” Jason said. “You’ll have to give me lessons later.” He looked back at the church. “Should we go in? What’s the worst that can happen, right?”
“They can point and call us names, crippling our self-esteem and ensuring we’ll never try anything like this again. Then we’ll die single and alone, the echo of their cruel laughter still ringing in our ears.”
“Very encouraging,” Jason said. “So glad I brought you along. And you’re wrong, because we won’t die single and alone. We made a promise, remember?”
This time he did take Emma’s hand and led her forward. Once in the church, they wandered down halls, reading signs on doors to find the correct room. When they found one with the door open, Jason took one look inside and knew it was the right place. The age tipped him off more than anything else, since everyone seemed so normal.
Sure there were a number of girls with shorter hair, and a few of the guys seemed dressed more for a nightclub than church, but for the most part, it could have been any random classroom. To Jason’s relief, he saw plenty of guys his age, if not a little older. Quite a few had turned to stare, eyes moving to the hand he was holding. Emma shook free first, striding into the room. All Jason could do was follow.
The room was drab with brown paneling and carpet that matched. Judging from the children’s drawings on the walls, this space was probably used for daycare or Sunday school or something similar. Unless part of the meeting would involve coloring pictures.
Chairs and a few couches lined the room, except for the far end where a table was set with refreshments. Emma led him to this, eying the display but not taking anything.
“It’s like an AA meeting in here,” she mumbled.
A skinny guy standing not far away overheard, and in a loud lispy voice said, “You’ve got that right, honey, but it’s not booze we’re addicted to!”
There were a few laughs, but Jason tensed up. This wasn’t what he wanted. He dreamed of meeting another guy in some romantic fashion. Not sitting in a circle and making jokes full of sexual innuendo. He turned to leave, hoping Emma would follow, and found his way blocked by an older man. His hair was thinning, and he wore outdated glasses and an unseasonal flannel shirt. One slightly hairy hand was extended outward.
“You must be new. I’m Keith, the group leader.”
Jason took his hand unwillingly, the skin of his palm soft. He watched as Emma shook hands with him too.
“We were just about to get started. If you two want to grab a drink first and—”
“We’re ready!” Emma said, grabbing Jason’s arm and leading him toward some chairs. Once he was seated he understood why. Directly across from them sat a group of girls, one of whom was so handsome that even Jason did a double-take. She had a tight lean body, her hair was gelled into spikes, and she sported a number of facial piercings. Emma kept looking in her direction, which meant he was stuck here. One meeting. He supposed he could suffer that much for her.
Keith took a seat next to this girl. “Today we’re going to talk about relationships,” he said, shaking his head at the catcalls this summoned. “But first, let’s do a round of introductions. Now, now!” he added after half the room groaned. “Some new faces are here today, and I could also use a reminder of who’s who. Tell us your name and one thing about yourself.”
As much as Jason was dreading his turn, this did give him an opportunity to check everyone out. A few guys were too young for him. Most of the others weren’t his type or were already paired up and holding hands. The lesbians didn’t interest him, of course, but Emma kept elbowing him every time she saw someone she liked.
“My name is Kelly,” said an articulate voice. The speaker was beautiful in a way that transcended gender. Skin as dark as freshly brewed coffee, eyes almond in both shape and color, amazing cheekbones, and perfectly pouty lips. Despite being undeniably pretty, he was also masculine enough to get Jason’s attention. “And I’m very disappointed Lisa didn’t bring brownies this time, since I skipped breakfast.”
“Sorry!” a mousy girl next to Jason replied.
Kelly smiled. “It’s okay.”
Jason nudged Emma in the ribs.
“I’m William,” said a quiet voice, which was odd considering how big the guy was. He was a good head taller than Kelly and a complete contrast to him. Handsome rather than beautiful, and skin so creamy and pale it looked like milk. Blond hair was swept to one side, his green eyes twinkling as he made a joke. “And I’m glad there aren’t any brownies since I ate way too much this morning.” The goofy smile was insecure and quickly forced away, even though the lips quivered a moment longer in amusement. Jason’s eyes darted down to a muscular body stuffed into tight clothes, but almost instantly returned to that face. He knew him. Or at least he felt he did, even though he honestly couldn’t say from where, or if he’d ever seen him before. That didn’t make sense, not logically, but Jason’s pulse picked up anyway.
William
. Even the name sounded right. Jason felt like he should stand up, should draw attention to himself so William could confirm this feeling of familiarity. “Oh, hey!” he’d surely say. “I know you! I’ve always known you!”