Skin on Skin (9 page)

“W
hy didn’t you show up last night?”

Tony’s voice in her ear sent a hot pulse through her core.
That’s why.
Lauren straightened and turned, taking the paper cup he offered. She took a sip of the hot latte, sweetened with half a sugar packet, exactly the way she liked it. Her heart squeezed and she wondered how on earth she was going to maintain her distance from a man who not only made her come so hard she saw stars, but also brought her coffee fixed perfectly to her taste. Which brought her right back to why she hadn’t, as had been her habit over the past several months, gone over to Tony’s to watch whatever major sporting event was being televised. “I had some stuff to do,” she said lamely, looking away from his dark, penetrating gaze. Truth was, she’d known damn well that if she’d gone over to Tony’s she wouldn’t have made it past kickoff before throwing him down on the couch and tearing his pants off. So she’d stayed home and watched the game on her crappy twenty-two-inch screen, eating stale tortilla chips for dinner, unwilling to leave the house for fear that if she got behind the wheel, her body would overrule her brain and drive her right over to Tony’s.

But it was so hard to stay away from him when every cell in her body cried out for just one more taste, one more touch. Every time he looked at her, it took every ounce of willpower not to open her mouth and beg him to take her to bed, to confess that she’d settle for anything he wanted to give, even if it was a few quick fucks between friends.

If she did that, she knew, she’d only end up hurt, her heart bruised and maybe broken, hating herself for being stupid enough to want more than he was capable of giving. So for now she needed to maintain a little distance and hope this awkwardness would pass.

To her dismay, as the week went on, it only got worse. Every time she looked at Tony, her brain overflowed with images of him naked, over her, under her, behind her. Of his dark head buried between her thighs as he licked his tongue up inside her. Her body responded accordingly, making it nearly impossible for her to have a normal conversation with him.

Worse, with every day her irritation and hurt grew as he proved himself more than able to go right back to being friends. Clearly the fact that they’d had sex multiple times in a twenty-four-hour period didn’t even register as a blip on his radar, much less wreak any sort of emotional havoc.

Still, he wasn’t indifferent to her efforts to avoid him. Whereas before they’d taken it as a given that she would show up at his house several nights a week, every day he’d been sure to issue explicit invitations. All of which she’d turned down with one lame excuse or another.

Friday was no different. “Let’s go for a run tomorrow,” he said, catching her as she was climbing into her truck. His hand rested on her thigh, burning through the fabric of her heavy-duty canvas work pants.

Oh, I can think of a better way to exercise.
She licked her lips and did her best to banish the lusty images from her head. “I don’t—”

He jumped in before she could refuse. “This might be the last weekend we can run all the way up to Horseshoe Lake before it snows. We haven’t gone in ages.”

A vehement “Yes” was on the tip of her tongue. She loved running the trails with Tony, always enjoying their banter as he challenged her with a quick pace. Yet she didn’t think she was up to the torture of watching his hard, muscled body move fluidly up the mountain, knowing that she had no business touching him, no business imagining him naked. “I can’t,” she said softly. “I made plans with Karen.”

His full lips tightened, his nostrils flaring at his irritated inhalation. “This isn’t fair, Lauren. Last weekend, we agreed when we got home, everything would go back to normal. What we’ve been doing this week, this isn’t normal. I’m doing my part.”

Tears stung her eyes, and she swallowed hard. “I’m trying,” she said, her voice tight. “But I,” her voice trailed off as his fingers pressed into the flesh of her thigh. Unable to focus with even that small contact, she jerked away.

Tony drew his hand back as though burned, then threw his hands up in impatience. “Fuck this,” he said angrily. “I’m tired of pussyfooting around this, getting blown off by you every time I turn around. Why don’t you give me a call when you get over it?”

Call me when you get over it.
Tony’s words echoed in Lauren’s brain all day Saturday as she ached to call him and take him up on his invitation for a run. It was a beautiful, crystal-clear fall day, the kind where the rugged mountains stood out in stark relief against the near painfully bright blue of the sky. Yet she resisted, as every time their conversation replayed in her brain, a stabbing sensation throbbed in her chest.

He wanted her to get over it, because obviously he had. So instead of joining Tony for a run, she spent all day doing anything and everything in an effort to distract herself. First she went on a ten-mile run on her own, then scrubbed her apartment from top to bottom. By the time she collapsed onto the couch in front of
Saturday Night Live,
her entire kitchen was organized and alphabetized.

By Sunday afternoon she couldn’t take it any more. Used to spending the better part of her free time with Tony, she found she missed him desperately. After nearly a week of barely speaking to him, she ached to simply sit on the couch next to him as they watched TV. She took a deep breath, bolstering her resolve. If Tony wanted her to get over it, to go back to the easy friendship they’d shared, she would do it. She’d known better all along than to expect anything more, and had even made it clear to Tony that this was exactly what she wanted.

Toughen up,
she told herself. Time to put her money where her mouth was, and put their wild weekend firmly behind her. Hadn’t she spent the past seven plus months ignoring her wild attraction to Tony? Surely she could do it again.

But now you know exactly how he looks naked, how he tastes, how his cock feels moving hard inside you…

Ruthlessly silencing the mischievous voice, Lauren quickly showered and dressed. The Oakland Raiders game was on in forty-five minutes, giving her just enough time to pick up a peace offering of pizza and beer to take over to Tony.

T
he Raiders had just kicked off to the Broncos when a knock sounded at the door. He quickly hit pause on his DVR, his heart picking up a few beats. It could only be Lauren, ready to make peace and watch the game. His stomach clenched at the implication. If she was over here, it meant she was able to move on from what had happened last weekend, and ready to settle back into their old, familiar friendship. But Tony had had a lot of time to think over the past few days. A lot of time to miss her. And in missing her, he realized his feelings had progressed far beyond friendship a long time ago. If he wasn’t in love with her, he was damn close.

Now he just had to convince her to give them a chance.

He took a deep breath and self-consciously smoothed his hair, wondering when he’d become such a coward. But his stomach was in knots and his hand actually shook a little as he went to answer the door, steeling himself to confess to Lauren the true depth of his feelings.

“Hi Tony.”

Disappointment flooded his chest as he recognized the woman standing on his doorstep. “Erin?”

Her green eyes raked him up and down, her dimples flashing as she grinned. “Can I come in?”

Without waiting for an answer, she pushed by him into the entryway. “Nice place,” she said on a low whistle, sauntering down the hall to the kitchen, hips deliberately swaying in her tight jeans.

Objectively, Tony had to admit Erin was attractive, even beautiful. She had a great little body, showcased nicely by a black turtleneck and dark washed jeans that appeared to have been shrink wrapped on her. Her dark brown hair hung in a silky fall almost to her waist, and she had pretty green eyes and a full red mouth that he knew she knew how to use. When he’d met her several months ago in a little bar in Tahoe City, she’d sparked his interest and he’d taken her up on her invitation back to her hotel room.

Now, as she leaned back against the breakfast bar and stuck her chest out in a not-so-subtle invitation, he felt nothing but the desire to get her to leave so he could go over to Lauren’s and get this whole mess straightened out.

He tucked his hands in the back pockets of his jeans, searching for a polite way to ask her to leave.

Oblivious, she reached out and grasped the fabric of his black T-shirt and used it to tug him toward her. “How did you find my house?” he asked.

“Looked it up in the phone book,” she said, in a sing-songy voice that someone down the line must have told her was cute.

His brow furrowed. “But I’m not listed.” And as far as he remembered, they hadn’t even exchanged last names. A stab of regret hit him hard. No wonder Lauren saw him as nothing but a male slut.

As though reading his mind, Erin laughed and said, “Okay, you got me. That night, when you went to the bathroom, I looked through your wallet.” She bit her lip and raised her eyebrows, “Clever of me, wasn’t it?”

Or creepy, depending on how you look at it.

“Anyway,” she continued, walking her fingers up his chest and moving close enough that their thighs brushed, “I came up to visit my parents and thought I’d look you up. We had so much fun last time, I figured, why not?”

Tony leaned as far back as he could, as her arms settled around his waist. “That’s really nice Erin, but—”

Before he got another word out, she grabbed the neckline of his shirt and yanked his head down to hers. He thought he might have tasted blood as her lips mashed his against his teeth, her tongue snaking around for entry. Somehow she turned them so his back was up against the breakfast bar, effectively boxing him in. Vaguely he heard the sound of a door slamming, and he put his hands on her hips to shove her away.

Lauren felt as though a giant fist had just nailed her right in the chest. Her breath froze in her lungs as she stupidly stared at the scene in front of her. At Tony, leaning against the breakfast bar that separated his dining room from his kitchen, kissing another woman. His hands were on her narrow hips, her arms were wrapped around his neck as she strained on tiptoe to reach his mouth.

Every nerve in her body told her to flee the scene before they realized she was there, but her feet were rooted to the floor. How could he do this? How could he be with someone so soon? She must have made some sound because Tony’s head snapped up. His dark brown eyes closed guiltily as he met her stunned gaze, and he gently pushed the other woman away.

She carefully set down the large pizza box and the six-pack of beer on the kitchen table. “I’m really sorry,” she mumbled, making a feeble attempt at a smile. “I didn’t realize you had plans and thought I’d come over to watch the game.” Tears seared the back of her eyes, and she turned and hurried to the door before she made an even bigger ass of herself by crying over a guy who changed bed partners like he changed his underwear.

“Lauren, wait!” he shouted as she flew out the front door and made a beeline for her jeep.

Ice coursed through her veins, making her hands shake as she tried to shove the key into the lock. Before she could get into the truck, Tony grabbed her by the arm and spun her around. Taking a deep breath, she hung on to the last fragile threads of her composure and shook him off.

“Lauren, this isn’t what you think. I didn’t even invite her over.”

She fought to keep her expression nonchalant. “Don’t worry Tony, it’s not my business what you do, or who you sleep with, as long as it isn’t me.”

She turned away and somehow managed to open the door of the truck. He wrapped one big hand around her biceps, his touch burning through the thin fabric of her shirt. “Please, don’t leave.”

She looked over his shoulder, meeting the beautiful, petite brunette’s inquisitive green gaze, and did her best to muster up a sarcastic smile. “I don’t know what your other girlfriends are into, but in my world, three’s a crowd.”

Pulling away, she slammed the door of the jeep and drove away in a haze. She made it to the end of Tony’s road and turned the corner before the sick humiliation overwhelmed her. Her stomach knotted painfully as she thought of how carefully she’d dressed, how she’d actually taken the time to put on makeup and style her hair, even as she’d tried to tell herself it didn’t matter if Tony found her attractive.

What kind of an idiot was she, thinking she could go back to being his friend after what they’d shared? Thinking she could handle the sight of him with another woman when even the mere thought made her want to vomit? She thought she could deal with it, thought she’d be ready for it. But she hadn’t thought it would be so soon, and didn’t think it would hurt so much. Idiot. What did she expect? She was in love with a man who was going to be with other women. Of course it hurt.

All these months, she’d been able to suppress her true feelings, convince herself that she was only infatuated. Not in love. In the last week the dam had broken, and she realized with cold, stunning clarity, that there was no way in hell she could go on acting like her feelings went no further than friendship. And today proved beyond a doubt that he didn’t feel the same.

Her cell phone rang obnoxiously, and a fresh wave of tears spilled as she recognized Tony’s number. She turned it off, knowing there was no explanation he could offer that would make her feel better. Knowing she didn’t deserve an explanation at all, and had gotten exactly what she deserved for pushing the boundaries of friendship yet again.

Scrubbing her eyes with the heels of her hands, she started up the truck. Clearly, she couldn’t keep working with Donovan Brothers, or even living in the tiny town of Donner Lake, for that matter. Her heart pinched at the prospect of not seeing or talking to Tony anymore. But seeing him every day, forced to work beside him, would eat away at her bit by bit. It was wimpy, it was cowardly, but she saw no option but to leave. Even though she knew this sharp, devastating pain would fade with time, she wasn’t enough of a masochist to put herself through it.

Swallowing back a sob, she turned into Mike Donovan’s driveway.

Tony slammed the heel of his hand into his steering wheel as he saw the empty parking space in front of Lauren’s apartment building. Even though her jeep was gone, he tried calling her apartment. No answer, as expected. He called her cell for what seemed the fiftieth time, only to be dumped immediately into voice mail.

Goddamn her! For the first time in his sorry life, he was in love, and the woman wouldn’t even take his calls. How was he supposed to convince her she’d misread the situation if she wouldn’t even take his calls?

He waited in front of her house for a full hour. Unwilling to give up, he drove down all two blocks of the town’s Main Street, hoping for a glimpse of her truck. Screw her, he thought. Damned if he was going to spend all night driving around looking for her. He would see her tomorrow at work anyway, and by God, he was going to get her alone and make her listen. Make her understand that he loved her, and no matter what she thought she saw, there was no one for him but her.

The next morning, he barely got out of the truck before he found himself body slammed, hard, up against the truck. The door handle dug into his kidney and his breath whooshed out as 230 pounds of powerfully built older brother smashed into him.

“Great fucking job, Tony!” Mike shouted, punctuating it with a shove that nearly unbalanced him. “Just couldn’t keep your fucking dick in your pants, could you?”

Tony shook his head, tried to regain his equilibrium. “What are you talking about?” As though he didn’t know.

“Well, thanks to some ‘personal issues,’ involving you, Lauren quit last night. She says she’ll stay until I can find someone to fill in, but with about a month to go before we’re severely limited by weather, I’m stuck trying to find a new carpenter.”

“Shit.”

“Yeah, shit. Worse, Lauren’s my friend, my wife’s friend, and I have to watch her get fucked over by my oversexed little brother.”

“It’s not like that.”

“You mean you didn’t have sex with Lauren last weekend and she didn’t find you at your house last night with someone else?” Mike thumped him in the chest.

“It wasn’t what it looked like,” Tony said with an angry shove back. “Look this is between me and Lauren. This isn’t any of your business.”

Mike grabbed his arm in a vice grip. “Not my business? I’d say it’s my business if your overactive libido costs me a key employee. And I’d say it’s my business when my good friend shows up at my door crying, telling me she can’t work with you anymore. Lauren’s not like your other women, Tony. You can’t just fuck around with her and dump her when you get bored.”

“I love her,” Tony yelled, slightly gratified as Mike’s jaw dropped in obvious shock. Come to think of it, Tony himself was a little surprised to hear himself say it out loud. But it felt good. Surprisingly right. So he said it again, this time more quietly. “I love her.”

Mike relaxed his grip on Tony’s arm. “Are you sure?” he asked, staring at Tony as though he expected a little green man to jump out and reveal he’d taken control of Tony’s brain.

Tony smiled. “I’m sure. Now if I can just convince her…”

“She’s at home. I told her to take the day off.”

Tony’s stomach clenched at that. She must have been really upset for a hard-ass like Mike to offer the day off.

Five minutes later, Tony pulled into Lauren’s parking lot and sprinted up the stairs to her door. He rapped hard on the door, tapping his booted foot impatiently as he waited for her to answer. The door opened slowly, revealing Lauren in tantalizing bits. Her hair was still wet from her shower, making dark spots on the shoulders of her robe. Her face, scrubbed clean of makeup, bore little evidence that she’d been crying. But when he looked more closely he could see her eyes were slightly puffy. If he had anything to do with it, she’d never again shed a single tear because of him.

“Can I come in?”

She nodded and stepped aside. Moving into her apartment’s tiny kitchen, she grabbed a cup of coffee from the counter and stirred in a spoonful of sugar. “So I guess you talked to Mike,” she said quietly.

“Lauren, please don’t quit, not because of me.”

“If you came to talk me out of quitting—”

“That’s not why I’m here. I came to talk to you about what happened last night.”

She held up a hand to silence him, and the sleeve of her robe slid back to reveal the smooth, tan skin of her forearm. “I already told you, you don’t owe me an explanation. It’s not your fault I couldn’t keep my feelings out of it.” She stared at the ugly blue and green flecked linoleum, refusing to meet his gaze.

He moved closer, unable to stop himself from reaching out and stroking the baby-soft skin of her inner arm. She jumped at his touch and tried to pull away, but Tony reached out with his other hand and tipped her face up to his. Her tongue stole out nervously over her plump, soft mouth, an invitation he couldn’t resist. His lips closed over hers in a soft, searching kiss. Her lips parted, a soft moan escaping her throat before she shoved him away.

“Please don’t do this,” she said shakily. “Please don’t make this any harder than it is.” She tried to move around him, but Tony backed her against the counter, settling his hands on either side of her hips.

“Listen to me, please,” he said. “I want more than a casual affair with you, Lauren. I want to be with you—”

“Ha!” She flung her head back, eyes shining with tears and anger. “You want to be with me? Is that why you had what’s her name over last night? You want to ‘be’ with her one night and me the next? No thanks!” She shoved hard at his shoulders, but he held firm.

“I didn’t invite her over,” he practically shouted. “Why can’t you believe me? Yes, I knew her before, yes, I slept with her, but I never thought I’d see her again and I didn’t invite her to my house.”

She snorted and folded her arms. “I’m supposed to believe that?”

He leaned in so close his forehead nearly rested against hers and he could feel the press of her breasts against his chest. “When have I ever lied to you? Yes, I’ve been with lots of women. Yes, I was a complete and total horndog for most of my adult life, but I’ve never lied to a woman just to get her into bed, and I don’t say things I don’t mean.”