Seventeen Days (17 page)

He turned me down and broke my heart all in one little sentence. Yes, we’re dating but we won’t be having sex?
What kind of relationship is this? How can he say we’re dating but we’re never going to get physical? Does he not want me? Am I not attractive enough? Am I too young for him? What the fuck is it?

Leaning against the bathroom door, I thought I heard him say he loved me, but I have to be hearing things. If he loved me, wouldn’t he want to be all-in with me, even if I am leaving? He should want it all… I do. Maybe I need to tell him I want him to be in my life no matter what happens. Let him know I
want
a future with him. 

Well, I guess I better get myself up from the floor and get dressed. I do have a father to meet, after all. I’ve spent too much time wallowing in my own pity on the bathroom floor as it is. Deciding to leave my hair damp and pull it up, I’m ready within five minutes. Which turns out to be great timing. As I’m exiting the bathroom, Harrison is opening the door to room service. 

Sitting down at the table in front of one of the plates, I open the lid and dive in. After the first bite, I answer his earlier question, letting him know I’m okay with meeting Julian tonight. We need to talk about the elephant in the room, but we can do it later. I’ll tell him how much I want him and hopefully things will be good between us. We’ve had more tension today than I can ever recall having with anyone. I’m not sure if it’s a good thing or not. I’m questioning everything lately. 

“Um. Where are we meeting Julian? His apartment?” 

Tossing his napkin on his empty plate, he answers, “No, I guess he asked to meet us at a nearby cafe. Your aunt left the name in the message, I’ve written it down. Hopefully we can walk to it and not have to take the car.” 

“We don’t have to take the car even if we can’t walk to the cafe. We can use the train system or grab a cab out front. So you don’t have to drive. You’ve got to be running on fumes by now. It’s been a long day for both of us not to mention the jet lag.” 

The bed appears mighty tempting and I slept on the flight over, but I could fall into the pillows now and not wake up till morning. 

“If we need a taxi, I’ll spring for it. Savannah handed me her credit card before we left, so we’re good to go.”

She told me to use it whenever I need to and to pay for my half of the hotel. I haven’t brought it up to Harrison yet, but I doubt he’ll let me do that. This hotel is a pretty posh and can’t be cheap. Not to mention the room service cost. And the fee from the parking garage. I’m going to owe him my pay from whatever job I find when I get wherever I land for the next year. He may have said this is a gift, but I can’t accept it all. It’s too much. 

“You won’t be using that at all, Red. She’s not paying for any part of this trip. Trust me, I have it covered. Don’t think twice about using it. You can leave it in the room for all I care. It’s useless.” 

I guess I’ll have to be sneaky and pay for things before he can. If we grab a cab, I’ll slip the cabbie the credit card before we leave. That way they can run it once we get where we’re going and Harrison won’t be able to do a damn thing about it. 

“We’ll see, Harrison. We’ll see. What’s the name of the cafe? Maybe the concierge knows where it is.” Yeah, I said concierge. Told you this place was posh. It’s a place undoubtly Sienna and her snooty ass would stay. 

“I’ve already called down to him, and he has directions waiting for us at his desk for when we leave.” 

He’s on top of things while I’m silently losing my mind. 

“I’m going to go brush my teeth and I’ll be set to go.” My breath has got to be horrendous; the red onions on my burger were strong. 

“Sounds good. I’ll need to brush mine too and I’ll be ready.” 

I’m minutes away from meeting my father. Minutes. Not hours. Not days. Not months. Mere minutes away from something that has been eighteen years in the making. If I stay focused on that fact, I’ll probably make myself have another panic attack. One of those was enough for a lifetime, so I think I’ll pass on having another. 

Grabbing my toothbrush, I close myself in the bathroom. If I close myself off from his concerned gaze,
maybe
I can stop a panic attack from happening.

Observing myself in the mirror, I see a scared little girl. Not a grown woman. But a little girl who’s scared shitless. My eyes appear like I haven’t slept in days, they’re so bloodshot and dry. Eye drops, I need fucking eye drops. And a Xanax. Too bad I don’t have access to one—a Xanax would go over big right about now. It’d calm my nerves for sure. I should’ve grabbed the bottle Sienna keeps in her bathroom before I was shipped to Alabama. 

Harrison appears behind me in the mirror. I didn’t hear him open the door. Catching my gaze in the mirror, he smiles. A girl could spend a lifetime falling into his smile. 

“We should get going, babe. We don’t want to be late.” Massaging my shoulders, he continues, “You can do this. You’re strong and feisty. Not to mention sexy, beautiful, and my personal favorite … ravishing. How could he not be excited to meet you?” 

Not able to form the words, I merely nod at him. He gently moves me over from in front of the sink and brushes his teeth. That gives me a moment and I’m able to actually speak. “Let’s get this over with.” 

The cafe ended up being around the corner. Literally. It’s around a quarter to eleven when we arrive, and I don’t see anyone fitting Julian’s description here yet. Which settles my nerves a bit. 

I’m curious to know all about him. If Harrison hadn’t booked a flight so fast, I may have been able to find out more about him. Explored him online. Googled him and shit. You can find out so much about a person online that you normally wouldn’t from knowing them. Like if they pay their taxes on time, or if they’re wanted for a crime. For shits and giggles you should Google yourself sometime, you’d be surprised what all pops up. 

I made the mistake of Googling myself after my birthday. My arrest record shows up along with my mugshot. Not the greatest moment of my life. The mugshot is littered in with pictures of me at certain events and clubs. Sienna must be tickled pink about my mugshot is online. At least I was smiling in it and seemed to be happy. 

After double checking all the tables both inside and out, I’m certain he’s not here yet. Everyone is with someone; no one is sitting by their self waiting for another to arrive. 

“How about we grab a table outside? There’s less people and it’s a beautiful night outside. It’s not too cool.” The less people around to witness my awkward meeting in my book, the better. It’s bad enough Harrison will be here. 

“That sounds great. I really hope I don’t blurt out anything ridiculous if things get weird. You know how I love to make a situation worse.” Like ask him if he actually knew it was my mother and not his wife. 

“You’ll be fine. Remember I’m right here right next to you if you need me. Let me be your rock to steady you.” 

Leaning into him, I do that, I trust him to be my rock. His arm reaches around behind me and his hand lands on my shoulder. His strength is what I needed. A waiter makes his way over to take our order; he’s speaking French, and to my surprise, Harrison orders back
in French
. Color me shocked, I didn’t know he spoke French. 

“I find it incredibly sexy to know, you speak French. Did you take it in high school or college?” 

“Mom was fluent, and she taught me. I’ve known the language since maybe around the time I was in the first grade. I was the only kid in my class who could give responses in French if I didn’t know the answer and wanted the teacher to not know what I was saying.” 

As he's answering, a gentleman approaches our table. He’s incredibly handsome. I know instantly he’s my father. He’s tall, probably close to six feet, if not taller. And his dark hair is showing tiny glimpses of gray. His eyes are an intense emerald green, and I know then he’s who I inherited my eye color from. 

“Morgana?” 

“Yes, but it’s I prefer to be called Morgan. You must be Julian.” I don’t stand to greet him. Instead, I lean harder into Harrison. 

“Morgan … Okay. I knew it was you by the hair. You’re the spitting image of your mother and Savannah. May I have a seat?”

“Um, yes, please do. This is my boyfriend, Harrison Montgomery.” It felt better to call him my boyfriend rather than my friend. He doesn’t correct me but instead lifts his hand that isn’t on me, and reaches to shake Julian’s. 

“Julian McKenzie. Nice of you to join us. I’ve heard a bit about you when Savannah called. Have you two ordered anything?” 

This is, to put it mildly, strange. He’s acting as if we’ve already met and this is like any other day.
Must be his way of coping
. 

Not able to answer him myself, Harrison does. “We’ve only now finished dinner at our hotel, but I ordered us a bottle of wine for the table. If you want anything else, you’ll have to let the waiter know.” 

“No, it’s fine. I’m not at all hungry. Wine is perfect.” 

Suddenly finding my voice, I blurt, “Did you ever try to contact me in the last eighteen years?” Might as well get this show on the road. If he’s shocked by my question, he doesn’t show it. 

“Yes. Several times. Sienna has never made it easy. She’s blocked every attempt I’ve made over the years. We almost met when you were here last—when you were arrested.”  

Excuse me, did I hear him correctly? 

“Um, wait a minute, what?” If his goal was to shock me, he’s succeeded. 

“When you were in Paris a few weeks ago. Our paths crossed. I didn’t know you were in town, but I had been planning on calling Sienna. I wanted to meet you now that you’re eighteen and was attempting to arrange it. Instead,
she
contacted me. She informed me, you had been arrested and if I ever wanted to meet you, I should post your bail. So naturally, I did. Immediately, I contacted my lawyer and your bail was posted within a few hours. Your mother had nothing to do with that, other than calling me. She told me you were of age now and she was washing her hands of you.” 

How many times in one week can a person’s mind be blown? I swear the people in my life are out to get me this summer. 

Harrison doesn’t say anything but squeezes my shoulder again. It’s his way of telling me to remember to breathe.

“You posted my bail? Why didn’t we meet then?” I don’t question the part about Sienna washing her hands of me; I’ve known it for a while now. It’s practically old news to me. 

“Would you have been open to us meeting? No, I’m certain you wouldn’t have. I can tell by your reactions tonight; you were hesitant to meet me. And yes, knowing that I still want to get to know you. I hope to spend as much time as possible with you while you’re in town, and in the future.” 

Do I want to know him?
Yeah, I do. We need to make up for lost time.
 

“Once I get over the shock of knowing you posted my bail, I’d say you have a good chance of getting to know me.” And I mean it. My life was empty before Aunt Savannah basically shoved her way in. She went as far as to force Harrison on me. Our friendship bloomed from equal dislike of the other. We’ve only grown closer in the few days since. If I’m truly honest with myself, I never disliked him. 

Downing my entire glass of wine, I feel much better. 

“Pour me another glass will you, please?” Turning to meet my father’s gaze, I continue, “We can spend the day together tomorrow, if you like. Harrison will be with us, and it’s not up for debate. We’ll see how things progress before making plans for after. Meet us in our hotel lobby at 10 AM, which is also not up for debate. We can wing it on what to do for the day from there.” 

I’m not sure how much more time I can spend with him tonight. It’s all a bit much for me. Glancing at my glass, I see Harrison didn’t refill it half way. Shrugging, I grab it and drain my glass again. “Let’s go, Harrison. I’m exhausted. We can all get to know each other more tomorrow after we’ve had some rest.”

Without waiting for him to reply, I get up and walk away from the table. Not bothering to say goodbye to Julian. It’s probably not the politest thing to have done, but I need more time to process my thoughts. Thinking that Harrison would leave the bill for Julian to pick up, I thought he’d join me immediately. Nope. Turning around, I see him still sitting there at the table motioning for the waiter to come grab the bill. Not wanting to wait for him and since we’re only around the corner from our hotel, I keep on walking. I’ll wait from him in the lobby. 

All I want is for this day to be over. It’s been one snowball after another. And I’ve yet to tell Harrison of my intentions when it comes to him.
Fuck me
. All I want to do is go to sleep for a solid eight hours. Preferably a dreamless sleep. 

A few minutes later, Harrison comes running into the hotel. I’m sitting in a chair near the front desk, watching him. He doesn’t see me and continues on to the elevator. He knows I don’t have a room key, but he must think I’m waiting outside our room door.

“Wait for me.” 

As the elevator doors open, he turns and sees me. “I wasn’t sure if you came straight back here. Never leave without me again, Red. No matter how badly you need to get away. You’ve scared me enough today to last a lifetime. I swear you’ve taken a year off my life from worrying about you.”