Secrets After Dark (21 page)

I take one last look at her before I head off. I’ll ask Mark. He’ll know best. I resolve to go and see him very soon.

At a quarter to eight, I arrive at Randolph Gardens. It’s been so long since I’ve been back to the boudoir, and I want to go and absorb the atmosphere before Dominic and I meet there again. In the lobby of the old apartment building I remember to turn left, rather than right, which was the way I used to go when I was living in Celia’s apartment. The little lift takes me up to the seventh floor and as it ascends I remember the times I approached this floor, nervous of what awaited me in the boudoir but also deeply excited and certain that it would be an unforgettable experience. It always was. I’ve missed it.

And here I am again,
I think to myself, a burst of happiness exploding inside me.
I’m going to be with Dominic. I feel as though this is our real reunion.

I let myself in. The little flat feels deserted and unloved, and I walk through its rooms, now dusty and a little chilly. It’s crazy to leave this place empty, but I don’t want to live here on my own, it would be too lonely. I thought Dominic and I would use it as our hideaway, but then he left and it’s been empty ever since, waiting for him to come back.
Just like me.

I go to the bedroom last of all. After Dominic left, I cleaned the room and made it all neat and ready again, just in case he should come back unexpectedly. If I’d known then how long I would have to wait, I would have wept. But that’s all over now.

The bed is the same, with its rigid posts and iron rail, so useful for tethering cuffs and silken ties. Opposite is the cabinet that contains some of the implements Dominic enjoyed using on me so much, along with ropes and blindfolds. I shiver lightly as I remember some of the erotic journeys he took me on. Over in the corner of the bedroom is the white leather seat, long and narrow and sloping upwards, with places to fasten hands or feet so that the body is exposed for the kiss of the cane or the whip. In the cupboard across the room is a variety of underwear, in both slippery silk and leather, and the collars I wore to signify my obedience. I go over to the cupboard and open it. There, on the shelf, is the collar I wore on the first night: an innocuous-looking bit of PVC with a pattern of holes punched into it and a bow at the front. I touch it, feeling the urge to pick it up and put it on. Dominic used to give me instructions on how to be dressed – or rather, undressed – and how to wait for him. My longing for him now makes me want to do the same again, to show him my love and need. I want him to see me ready and waiting, eager to do what he desires.

I can take anything if it means we can be together.

I remember the flogging in the dungeon of The Asylum. That was too much for me, I admit that. But I took almost as much in this room and even though some of what Dominic desired to do to me went further along the road than I really wanted, I never regretted how he made me feel. I know I want to feel that way again.

The sound of a key in the front door startles me and I quickly shut the cupboard. As I move, I realise I’m already aroused by the memory of what happened between us and the anticipation of pleasure yet to come. ‘Dominic, is that you?’

‘Of course,’ he says with a smile as I come out into the hall to meet him. ‘I hope you weren’t expecting anyone else.’

I laugh, but inside there’s a sudden pang of guilt. I push it away for now. I want to enjoy this moment without worrying.
After all, if he wasn’t in the passageway with me, there’s no way he can know what happened there.

Dominic stands before me, handsome in a dark suit, a lime-green silk tie providing a note of colour, and he opens his arms to me. His eyes are meltingly brown and his beautiful mouth is curved in a tender smile. ‘Come here, Beth. I’ve waited so long for this moment. The two of us, alone, in our old place.’

I’m overcome with joy and throw myself into his arms, pressing my face against his reassuring chest and relishing the feeling of his arms wrapping tightly around me. ‘I’ve waited so long!’ Emotion rushes up inside me. Dominic has been so far away and hard to reach, my texts and emails seemed to fall into a black hole. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t summon him back. But now, at last, he’s returned to me. My lip is trembling as I pull myself close against him, my arms around his broad back. The smell of him, warm and male and delicious, so beautifully familiar, makes my chest contract and I realise that tears are welling up. One immediately overflows and trickles down my cheek. I sniff.

‘Beth?’ He pulls back and gazes down at me. With one thumb, he wipes away the errant tear. ‘Beth, honey, what’s wrong?’

‘Nothing.’ I smile up at him, even though tears are flowing fast now. ‘I’m just so glad to see you, that’s all.’

His eyes soften. They’re unbelievably beautiful, framed with dark lashes, a deep brown that turns darker at moments of great emotion: I’ve seen them black with anger and black with lust. ‘I’m happy to see you too.’ He runs his thumb down my cheek as if scooping up tears with it. ‘But don’t cry. Tonight is happy, isn’t it?’

I nod, blinking away the last of my tears. ‘I think seeing you like this was just a bit much for me. I’m happy, really, I promise!’

‘Good.’ He bends his head down to mine and I feel the soft warmth of his lips as they brush my mouth. Oh, that kiss... I close my eyes and tip my head back to receive it properly, but instead I feel his thumb brushing over my lips. ‘Not yet,’ he murmurs. ‘Let’s eat first. You can be my dessert... and I’ll be yours.’

‘That sounds delicious,’ I whisper. Then I’m suddenly crestfallen. ‘But I didn’t bring any food! I forgot completely.’ My appetite was entirely lost in the excitement of seeing Dominic.

‘Don’t worry,’ he replies, and smiles. ‘I did.’

It’s a simple supper but perfect for us: Dominic has brought lamb steaks, already marinated in rosemary and garlic, some vegetables and a bottle of good red wine. ‘Quick and very easy,’ he says as he heats the grill. ‘See what you can find in the cupboards.’

The apartment hasn’t been properly lived in but I manage to assemble plates and cutlery and some mugs to drink the wine out of. An old screw bottle opener, located at the back of a drawer, gets the cork out, and I pour the wine. A delicious aroma of grilling lamb fills the kitchen and I realise I’m starving. When Dominic puts the plate in front of me ten minutes later, I’m very ready to eat.

‘How was your day?’ I ask as I fall on the food.

‘Not too bad considering how long I’ve been out of town. Just a few glitches and headaches but mostly good progress on the big deal. Another week or so and we’ll be completing, if all goes according to plan. And then...’ He looks up at me and smiles. ‘Watch out, Dubrovski!’

‘What do you mean?’

‘I’ll be resigning and setting up my own company to manage my money and start investing. I know exactly what I want to do and how to do it. So far Andrei’s been profiting from my expertise while I’ve learned all I need to know from him, but now I’m going to take control and do it my way.’

‘What a surprise,’ I say teasingly. ‘Taking control? Doing it your way? That doesn’t sound like the Dominic I know and love.’

He looks a little bashful, then says, ‘I’m no good as an employee. It takes all my willpower not to tell Dubrovski to go and jump in a lake when I don’t agree with what he wants to do. I’ll be better as my own boss, that’s for sure.’

I observe him as we eat. I know he’s right. It’s obvious that Dominic wants and needs to run his own ship. It must have been a huge test of his character to submit to Andrei’s wishes and do his job someone else’s way. But how will Andrei feel about his one-time employee becoming a rival? He’s a man used to being top dog. Surely he won’t ever see his protégé as a serious contender. I think suddenly of an old wolf being taken on by a fitter, younger male in the pack, one who was once a trusted lieutenant but who has now sensed weakness in the leader and is prepared to risk a battle to the death.
But Andrei’s not there yet. He’s not old and he’s far from weak. And I’ll bet he’s prepared to crush anyone who wants to take what he considers his.

‘How about you?’ Dominic says, oblivious to my thoughts. ‘Good day?’

‘Strange day.’ I glance up at him as I say, ‘Anna was in the apartment today. She obviously spent the night.’ I watch him carefully for any change in his expression –
even though I’m sure he’s not involved with her, I can’t help worrying just a little
– but he doesn’t react. ‘It looks as though she and Andrei are together again.’

‘For now,’ he says with a shrug. ‘I don’t know how they really feel about each other, but they enjoy sleeping together, so best of luck to them.’

‘It’s not right though, is it? An employer sleeping with someone who works for him?’

‘If it were anyone else but Anna, I might be concerned. She definitely knows how to look after herself. In fact, if anyone ought to look out, it’s Andrei.’ Dominic gives me a broad smile. ‘Believe me, Anna’s tough.’

Tough... clever... successful... beautiful... sexy... what more could a man want?

Don’t think like that, I tell myself strictly. After all, I know it only leads to jealousy and misunderstandings. I think of my own possible misunderstanding. I’ve been replaying the events in the catacombs all day but my memory is always the same: a passionate encounter with Dominic, followed by a complete blank. It’s only the details I’ve learned since that have bred this awful suspicion into me, and Anna’s words this morning made me doubt even more the version I believe in.
I have to ask him. I don’t know if I’ll be able to give myself properly to him if I’m afraid that I’ve been unfaithful.
Once again, I see the trap I’m in: I can’t ask him without also letting him know what I’ve done.
I’ll have to ask him subtly.

‘Did you enjoy dancing with Anna at the party?’ I ask casually.

At once he fixes me with a stare and his smile fades just a little. ‘Don’t start that again, Beth. I think I made myself perfectly clear on that point. You’ve got nothing to worry about.’

‘I know, I know,’ I say hastily. ‘I didn’t mean that. I just meant – we had more fun when we were together, didn’t we?’

‘Of course we did.’ His expression relaxes again. ‘You know that. Just being near you was great, and all the more because it was so unexpected. You looked so beautiful – you were the most stunning woman at the party.’

I smile, touched and happy at his compliment. ‘I wanted to look my best for you – you were the whole reason I was there. That’s why being alone together meant so much.’

‘I know,’ he says softly, his eyes liquid. ‘It was amazing to touch you like that... to feel you again. I’ve been so hungry for you. Honestly, Beth, sometimes when I’ve been in some tin shack in the depths of Siberia with only a handful of miners for company and a stove for warmth, I’ve imagined you with me, your beautiful ripe body, your gorgeous curves, and it’s what’s kept me going. Knowing you were waiting for me, just like you promised, and knowing I would one get day get to hold you again, like I did at that party.’

‘I’ve longed for you too,’ I say huskily. ‘I wanted us to make love again... that’s why it was so, so sweet when we did. I couldn’t resist you, it didn’t matter where we were.’

‘It was incredible for me too,’ he replies.

Relief floods over me.
That’s what I needed to know. It was Dominic in the tunnel, not Andrei. Oh thank God! I’m free of that awful, horrible guilt.

‘What’s so funny?’ he says, amused. ‘You’re smiling fit to burst!’

‘Nothing, nothing – I’m just so happy!’ I leap up and go around the table to throw my arms about him. I give him an enormous hug. ‘I can’t believe we’re together again, and everything’s all right.’

‘Hmmm – how about we come back to this dinner later?’ Dominic takes one of my hands and presses it to his lips, biting it lightly with his teeth, and adds, ‘Only, I’ve just thought of something I’d enjoy far, far more...’

We start to kiss properly, exploring deep into one another’s mouths. It’s so addictively pleasurable that we can hardly pull apart long enough to stumble out into the hall and from there into the boudoir but somehow we manage it, discarding our clothes along the way until we’re in the bedroom. I’m wearing only my underwear now, and Dominic kisses me hard as he unclasps my bra and releases my breasts, giving a low murmur of appreciation as the rosy pink nipples, already protruding, are revealed. He runs a hand over the soft mounds, cupping them. ‘You’re so gorgeous... I’ve dreamed about these beauties, about tasting them and sucking them...’ He drops his head and pulls one of my nipples into his mouth, tugging gently. Then he releases it, smiling a lazy smile. ‘And tasting you here too...’ He hooks a finger under my silk knickers and brushes it light across me. I shiver as he leaves a burning trail over my skin. Within a moment, the knickers lie in a shiny black puddle on the floor and I’m completely revealed to him. What he sees evidently pleases him, from the sight of his boxer shorts. I slip my hand into the opening and wrap my fingers around his erection, and he moans softly.

Suddenly he picks me up and lifts me onto the bed, lying me on my back. I watch as he slides his boxers down and takes them off. I can’t take my eyes off his enormous erection. I haven’t seen it for so long – our encounters since he left have been in darkness so I’ve only felt it. Now the sight of it makes me throb and ache with need, but I try to control it. We have all the time we want tonight.