“Yes, I know that, Reese. I was there, remember? Answer my fucking question. What happened to the baby, Reese? Did you have an abortion? Did you give the baby up for adoption? What the fuck happened?”
“I would never hurt our baby, Walker. I loved him from the minute I found out that I was pregnant.”
“You loved him so much, but yet you didn’t tell me. How could you keep this from me? And my father knew this entire time, but I was kept in the dark about my baby? Wait a minute. You said…
him
.”
My head was fucking spinning right now. I had a son, my first son, and I never knew he existed. I turned back to Reese and begged her to go on with her story.
“I need to know everything, Reese. Please tell me what happened next.”
“I can’t, Walker. Please, it’s too painful, and I’m exhausted.”
“Exhausted? Really? How about all the nights that I went without sleep after you left? You leaving nearly destroyed me. You had to know that it would.”
“Of course I knew! I begged your father not to do this to us, but he wouldn’t listen. When I left you that note, I had no time to really even think about my words, and that bastard of a lawyer actually checked what I had written to you. Your father read it too, and he almost laughed at me. But he gave his nod of approval, and then his lawyer handed it back to me. I was praying you would read between the lines and figure out that I would never have done this on my own. But you never came for me, and every day that passed, I was more lost than ever.”
“It was the same for me, Reese. The unknown was the hardest to come to terms with. I did search for you. I hired private detectives, but all the leads came up empty. It was as if you just disappeared off the grid, never to be heard from again. Now after all this time wondering what the hell happened to you…you materialize right in front of me. Please tell me the rest, I need to know everything.”
She continued, “When I left New York, I had no idea where to go. I couldn’t go back home to Georgia. I was too ashamed, and I knew if I told Nana and Granddaddy, they would have wanted to go up against your father, and I just couldn’t risk that. If anything were to happen to them and their land, I would have never forgiven myself.”
“You had to know that Pottersville would be my first place to search for you. I took the first flight out, Reese, and when I got there, Lila was heartbroken. She said that you called her and told her to tell me not to look for you. Why? How could you ask her something like that? It broke her heart.”
“That was another choice that I had no control of, Walker. Your father watched my every move. He knew you would search for me and he thought I would go home, but I went to California instead. I spent the next three months in a small one bedroom apartment. I owned nothing but the clothes on my back and the picture I took from your nightstand. It was my saving grace every time I looked at it. Every single day and night, I prayed on it for you to find me. I never wanted to leave you, Walker, not in a million years. I’m so sorry.”
“Reese, I’m having a difficult time wrapping my head around this. How could you be in California and not seek me out? You knew that’s where I was moving. We were in the same city, and our paths never crossed? What the hell? Why didn’t you try to contact me? You mean to tell me that my father had you on what, twenty four/seven surveillance? Come on, Reese, if his goal was to eradicate you from my life, then why track your every move? You were gone already.”
“Yes, I was, and he wanted me to stay gone. I was still a liability Walker, don’t you get it? I was pregnant with your child, and although he forced me out and held my grandparents over my head, he knew I was still going to try to reach you. All I wanted was to tell you the truth, but every time I tried, he stopped me. Right before I flew back to New York, I saw you on the grounds of Reed Global. You were walking the path to the entrance with your father. I saw you stop and look around. Did you feel me there Walker?”
“Oh my god. Yes! The gravitational pull I was feeling was strong, and I instantly felt you. Why didn’t I see you then?”
“Before I could call out to you, I was grabbed from behind. He covered my mouth and held me until your father joined us.”
“Who was it, Reese?”
“Your father’s bodyguard, Ralston.”
“Motherfucker! Did he hurt you?”
“Not physically, but mentally the two of them kicked me over and over again, until I was completely shattered, kind of like what I’m feeling now.”
“I’m so sorry, baby, I’m so sorry. I know this hurts you to relive this, but I need to know everything. Please go on.”
“I tried to stand up to your father, and I told him that I told my family everything, and we were willing to fight him. I threatened him with empty promises thinking it might work, but all it did was anger him more, and then I collapsed. I was on my knees again, begging him to please stop this crusade of hating me and let me go to you. I wanted to tell you so badly about our baby and beg you to forgive me, but again, Phillip wouldn’t listen. He said you moved on without me, and I was to take my bastard child and go away and never ever to return again. What could I do, Walker? He won, and I let him.”
Reese continued, “Shortly after my confrontation with your father, I managed to return to New York, and it was Freddy who convinced me to try to find and talk to you. I was willing to do anything to see you. I was going to beg for forgiveness and ask you to take me back. If we found our way back to each other, then I would have told you everything about what your father did to me. My agent, Marsha, if you remember her, booked me into the hotel under a false name. I was going to rest a bit before calling you. I wasn’t feeling well on the plane, and I just got sicker once I checked in to my room. It was early morning, and I tried to eat some breakfast, and while going through the papers, there you were on Page Six of the newspaper. You were hand in hand with Elizabeth, looking so happy, and she clearly looked like the happiest woman in the world. She finally got her man, but it didn’t matter. I had your child, and nothing was going to stop me this time.”
She went on, “I thought I was strong enough to leave to find you, but after seeing what I saw, the pain in my stomach intensified, and it literally brought me to my knees. Something was horribly wrong, and I was afraid I was losing the baby. I called for help, and when I woke up, I was in a New York City hospital. I’m so sorry, Walker. The baby didn’t make it. I was just beginning my second trimester of pregnancy and was told that our baby may have had abnormalities that contributed to the miscarriage, but I never believed that.”
“So I’m clear on all of this, Reese. My father blackmailed you with something from your past. He knew you were pregnant with my child and purposely kept it from me. He fabricated lies on top of lies to make you leave me, and then when you finally decide to return to me, you lose our baby. Is that all of it? Or do you want to rip my heart out even more? …And a Page Six picture, Reese? A stupid fucking publicity photo made you so physically sick that you lost our baby over it?”
“Walker, don’t you dare turn this around on me! It wasn’t just seeing the picture. How about me finding out I’m pregnant, and I’m scared to death and all alone. I barely had time to process what was happening, and then your father and his lawyer and bodyguard bullied me out of your life, and then put me through more months of stress and heartache. That’s what contributed to losing our son, Walker. I never stood a chance against your father, and he knew it all along. You were just as much his puppet as I was. Only the difference is that he played you behind the scenes, without you ever knowing anything.”
I had always known my father to be a bastard, but I never knew what he was truly capable of, until hearing Reese’s story. It was my story, too, and I was just another pawn in his chess game of controlling my life. As much as it pained me to hear this, I couldn’t lash out at her. This was not her fault.
“Reese, can I please hold you?” I asked.
She didn’t hesitate this time and threw herself into my arms. I needed to feel her body against mine.
My sad, broken girl. Hell, I was broken too!
Whispering into my chest, Reese was crying, and I could barely hear her struggling voice.
“I’m so sorry, Walker. You can blame your father for all of this, and for a long time I did, but the blame also falls onto me. I should have been stronger and not be afraid. If I stayed and waited for you, I could have told you everything, but I ran like a coward and risked my health. If I could go back in time to change the course I was foolishly led on, I would do it, but it’s too late for us now.”
“The hell it is, Reese. Don’t you see that this was meant to be? Even after all of these years, we are here and we can begin again. I love you, and I never stopped wanting you.”
“Walker, how can you say that? You married Elizabeth, and you had a child with her. A son who is now falling in love with my daughter? How can you possibly see us together after everything I have told you? What about Elizabeth? Where does she fit into you wanting to be with me?”
“Elizabeth suffered a stroke while in labor with our son. She was placed on a machine while our son was delivered by a caesarian. She never regained consciousness and was ruled brain dead. As her husband, I had to make the decision to respect her wishes and remove her from life support. I brought my son home two days later, and we buried his mother. The building that I built for your husband to perform miracles in that is my shrine to her. The building is dedicated in her honor, and it’s what brought our kids together.”
“I’m so sorry, Walker. I never knew that she died, I feel three shades of foolish for not knowing that.”
“How could you know, Reese? I was living out in California and about to begin my new role as a widower and father. I was twenty two years old. I thought I would have Elizabeth with me to help raise Jackson, and then the unthinkable happened. My father handed me over the business, and it was mine to run. Sadly, I confess, it’s all I know. I have raised Jackson on my own and became the mogul my father always wanted me to be.”
“Walker, I know I don’t have the right to ask, but what made you stop looking for me?”
“You have every right Reese, but the truth is, after you called me and I begged you to come back to me, I was just done. I lost all hope on ever finding you. Freddy cut me off, and anyone that knew us had no clue to your whereabouts. Like I said, Reese, you just disappeared.”
“Um…Walker, I never called you.”
“Yes, you did, Reese. I received several calls from you, but you never answered me back, you just stayed on the line and listened to me pour my heart out, until it shattered even more.”
“I swear that wasn’t me. It had to be your father trying to throw you off. If you were so close to finding me, and then you got a mystery call allegedly from me, then he had to know you may eventually reach your breaking point and give up. Clearly, you did. I’m sorry, I don’t mean to say it with such vehemence in my tone, but it hurts like hell, maybe even more so now.”
“Reese, I never believed that you left me on your own. I didn’t want to, something always felt wrong about it, but I never could prove my father’s involvement in it. He always admitted to not liking you, and he never tried to hide it. So that was his way of manipulating me out in the open. Yes, I married Elizabeth, but Reese, you were always in my heart. After you left, it was Elizabeth who saved me. I drank myself into anything that would numb my pain, and then she was there to pick up the pieces of my life. I don’t know how I would have survived if it wasn’t for Elizabeth. I know this hurts you to hear that, but it’s the truth and why hide anything now.”
“Walker, do you think she knew what your father was up to?”
“I can’t believe she willingly had anything to do with our break-up. You didn’t know Elizabeth like I did. We grew up together, and she was not like the rest of the rich, high society girls that were in our circle. She was kind, and very beautiful inside and out. She helped me return to the land of the living and saved me from self-destructing. Elizabeth knew who my heart belonged to. I never kept my feelings from her, but she didn’t care and loved me anyway. I never deserved her, but she always told me that I did and we could start our own happiness on our terms. After I graduated, we became lovers, and I guess you can call it dating. I wasn’t ever with anyone else. Our families were thrilled, and I was on my way to taking over the throne at Reed Global.”
“We married shortly after Elizabeth discovered she was pregnant with Jackson. As much as I loved you, Reese, I married her, because I was about to become a father. I stepped up and tried my best to be a husband for her. We lived happily until she died.”
Reese and I had been in this car for hours now. We still had so much to talk about, but I knew we each needed to get back to our kids. My cell phone beeped a while ago, and it was Jackson telling me that he was on his way home. I was still holding Reese, as she had her arms wrapped around my waist. I gently kissed the top of her head and inhaled her beautiful scent. She always smelled like exotic berries mixed with vanilla. I always laughed at her crazy mixtures of products. She used to combine several scents to get the perfect one for her hair. I playfully teased her about her career choices. She should have been a chemist instead of a model or teacher.
I could have stayed in that car forever with her, but our time together was coming to an end, at least for now.
“Jackson and Riley are on their way back from the Village. Check your phone. I’m sure Riley texted you as well.”
“Can we stay like this for a few more minutes?” she whispered to me.
“You can stay…forever.” She looked up at me and let her tears fall, but she pulled away before I could wipe them off her cheeks.
“Forever.” If only…
Hearing Walker repeat the same words to me now like he did back then gave me a glimmer of hope. The fantasy was always better than the reality. I could easily get caught up in believing we could be together again, but how? I was married to Samuel. I had built an entire life around my husband, our daughter, his career, and left no room for me.