As I lifted the lid from the small crimson box and saw what lay inside, my knees buckled and I fell onto the sofa behind me. My heart dropped into my stomach and the pillar of strength I had been trying to erect came crashing down on top of me. Tears flowed freely and I wept into my hands as they fell into the box on my lap.
“Oh, Claire, I’m sorry! You don’t like it. I shouldn’t have, I’m sorry,” Robin fumbled in her unvampire-like manner and quickly tried to snatch the box from me.
With unnatural speed, my hand flew to her arm and I squeezed her cold wrist. “No Robin. It’s perfect.” I looked back into the box and gazed at two familiar faces framed inside a tiny, gold locket. A picture of my mom and a picture of Liz smiled back at me.
“I can guess how much you miss them. I thought you’d like to have something to remember your human life. We believe… well my parents and I, believe that even after you change, that life can never be washed away. You’ll carry your humanity with you for all eternity.” Not wanting to burst into another fit of tears, I leapt into Robin’s unsuspecting arms. Her cold embrace seemed to calm the fire of emotion flickered to life inside me.
Almost breathlessly, Robin released me and smiled at my obviously flushed and snotty face. “I had better get going before you start me crying! You should probably clean yourself up before the queen gets here.”
I grabbed a tissue from a nearby table and started to wipe the tears from my face. As I pulled the tissue away, I saw the black smears of my mascara and realized I must look a mess.
Robin winked at me with her boundless dark eyes as she started to exit my room. “Hey, Claire.”
“Yeah?”
“We’re all going to watch a movie later… The new Johnny Sky flick. If you’re up to it, you’re welcome to join us.”
I wondered whom she meant by everyone. I was certain Ana would not want me hanging out in the same room with her; but not being there would give her too much satisfaction. The thought of making her night that much less enjoyable was suddenly very tempting.
“I’d like that,” I said as I smiled through my subsiding tears. Robin displayed her angelic smile and swiftly left after shutting the door with such speed, I thought it would surely slam loudly, but I barely heard the latch click.
I stood in the room for a long moment, breathing deeply and holding the locket tightly in my fist next to my heart. I was grateful to finally have another moment alone, even though it made me feel terribly isolated.
Emotional exhaustion started to kick in so I made my way to the bed and saw Louie patiently waiting for me. He meowed at my approach and lazily rolled over, begging to be petted. His presence was at once comforting and I curled up next to him, listening to his steady, deep purr as I scratched his head.
“Oh, Louie, I’m glad you’re here with me. You won’t be scared of me after I change, will you?” He meowed at me in response and turned his head so I could scratch under his chin.
We lay in bed for a while and I saw that someone had set up a small sleeping area for Louie. He had crystal feeding dishes and a fluffy cat bed. I made a mental note to find out the responsible party and scolded myself for being so negligent.
I dragged myself out of bed and finally found the courage to look in the mirror. Dark tracks of tears ran down my red face. I knew I couldn’t meet with the queen looking like this, so I quickly did my best to clean myself up. I dug out my favorite sweats and camisole from my bags, relishing the familiar comfort they provided. After changing, I tied my auburn hair into a messy bun and washed my face thoroughly, with the coldest water I could stand.
I stared at myself in the mirror for a while, trying to decide what I would look like after the change. Would I still look like myself? Or would I not even recognize my reflection? My light eyes would be lost to the infinite darkness that all vampires shared.
Thinking of that made me recall something I heard a protestor say once during a news report. The man’s name was Tony something and he was well known for his abhorrence of vampire rule. He always argued that the eyes were the windows to the soul, and since vampires’ eyes were empty pools of pitch, it was proof they had no souls.
“Am I going to lose my soul?” I whispered to myself. I wasn’t sure if I believed it, but it was a scary thought. I sifted through the collective memories of my recent experiences with vampires and concluded it held no weight. There was no way Robin and her family, even Dmitry couldn’t have souls… Was there?
I didn’t want to spend any more time on such thoughts. It would only make the transformation that much scarier. Dwelling on things that I couldn’t change wouldn’t help me at all. What I could do, however, was undergo the change and fulfill Nicolae and Evilyn’s legacy.
Feeling relieved after having slightly organized some of the worries on my mind, I curled up on the sofa in my sitting room with Louie. I flipped on the television while I waited for Evilyn to arrive. I purposefully avoided any news programs and settled on a campy sitcom.
I was starting to drift off to sleep when the sound of my bedroom door opening startled me. The queen, regal and poised as always, took two gliding steps into the room.
“May I come in, Claire?” she asked sounding very proper.
“Of course,” I said as I quickly sat up and tried to fully awaken myself. Louie ran under the bed angrily after I scooted onto him to make room for Evilyn on the couch.
She took a seat beside me and seemed to relax her posture a bit more than usual when I smiled at her. “Tomorrow night will be a big night for you.”
I didn’t answer for a moment. We just sat silently, watching the program on the television, ignoring the slight feeling of awkwardness that hung between us. The queen spoke suddenly as if no time had passed. “I remember the night before I was turned. Although I of course didn’t know ahead of time that I would be changed. Now when I look back on it, however, I remember it as a very happy night in my human life.”
I wanted to ask her what it was like, but I felt that was probably a very personal moment for her. I wasn’t comfortable enough with her to feel free to ask her whatever I pleased. With no allowance for my mental deliberations, the queen continued.
“I would like tonight to be very special for you. Although of course, we will be celebrating shortly after you are formally adopted into our family, we want your last night as a human to be a night you cherish and remember fondly. It is important to Nicolae and me that we make this as uncomplicated a transition as possible.”
“I think I am handling it alright. Well, as well as I possibly can, I think,” I said with a feeble smile. My weak attempt at confidence did not fool Evilyn’s keen perception.
“I know we are asking a lot of you, Claire, and there are no words I can ever say to express the gratitude we share for the sacrifice you are making. In a way, you are our savior. Our symbol of strength, loyalty, tradition and honor. If you had chosen not to be with us, our world, and that of the humans, would fall to ruin. You may not realize it, but you and I have more in common than you think. Unlike the younger vampires, who were given adequate time to incorporate the change into their lives, you and I have both been thrust into it, with little or no warning.” Evilyn rested her hand on mine, squeezing it gently.
“I guess I never thought of it that way. Even if it doesn’t show, I really am happy about my decision. I imagine it will take a good long while for me to fully grasp my new life, but I am already looking forward to it.”
“I am glad to hear you say that. You are displaying such strength and courage and I am very proud of you. Now, how did your discussion with Edgar go earlier this evening? I trust you learned what you needed to?”
“A lot, actually. He was a very good teacher,” I said. My cheeks blushed in slight embarrassment as I recalled how Edgar nervously explained the changes I could expect my body to go through.
Evilyn sensed my embarrassment and smiled kindly as a sweet laugh escaped her. It was a beautiful, soft whisper of a sound and it made me want to hear her laugh more just to hear its loveliness. “Oh, Claire, you do remind me of myself when I was young. I assure you Edgar is as good a teacher as any, although it is customary to have a female vampire instruct you with the transformation. I am here now to answer any questions you may have.”
She waited expectantly and I could barely catalog the multitude of questions in my mind fast enough. “Edgar said I would immediately recognize changes in my body, but he did not go into very much detail. Do female vampires go through different changes than the males?”
“Every single vampire undergoes a slightly different transformation as everyone’s abilities vary in strength and weakness. It all depends on your disposition before the change takes place. For instance, some become faster, some will be better at charming, and some can sense others’ emotions more astutely. Like young Robin Willow, she is extremely attuned to others’ emotions. I haven’t seen anyone quite like her in a long time.”
“Where do you think my strength lies?” I had wondered this myself. I feared that I was worrying less about my actually becoming a vampire and more about whether or not I would be as great a vampire as they all hoped and seemed to think I would.
The queen stroked my head as a mom would a small child and smiled warmly at me, her porcelain fangs sparkling behind her ruby lips. “You will be excellent at many endeavors.” I sighed and silently prayed that she was right.
“Now, Claire, what can we do to make this an amazing night for you?” Evilyn asked excitedly. I couldn’t help but feel slightly infected with her enthusiasm.
“Honestly, I think I would like to just hang out with Robin and Dmitry and watch a movie. I don’t need anything special. Besides, we are having a big coronation ball, right?” I probably sounded silly, but I truly did love to dance; and I didn’t dare ask what I really wanted, which was to see Liz and my human mom.
“Anything you wish, my dear. You will be the most beautiful vampire princess there ever was at a coronation ball. There have been many young vampire men already discussing your unparalleled beauty,” the queen said as she winked at me, her dark eyes sparkling.
My jaw dropped in response and I wasn’t sure what to say. I tried to think of all the different vampires I knew of in our region. There were so many lords and ladies, dukes and duchesses, that I always found it hard to keep track. They each had their own “children” and their families slowly grew in size over time. I did vaguely recall Liz commenting on the brutal hotness of a vampire duke’s son in the southern part of our region.
I saw the queen smiling at me as she, no doubt, could feel my heart fluttering with emotion. “Don’t you worry, there will be plenty of time to think about men later. You will have many new duties to keep you busy. There is still much you need to learn, and once you are turned, you may begin.”
What Evilyn said raised a question and I couldn’t help but ask, “Are there things I can’t learn until I
am
turned?”
She nodded at me and her expression resumed to the emotionless vampire mask. “Very perceptive, Claire, perhaps you are more gifted than you realize. Yes, there are some traditions that must be fulfilled, but such secrets can be discussed only with vampires, no matter what the circumstances.”
She rose then and walked toward a large vase near the entrance of my room. She sniffed the flowers and relished their fragrance before addressing me again. “Go now and enjoy your night. I don’t want to keep you any longer. Please rest your mind tonight, so that you may enter your new life with a clear head.”
With that, Evilyn exited my room. I felt a little miffed at her departure. She completely evaded my question and almost seemed eager to leave after I asked it. My anger quickly deflated, however, as I thought I might have offended her. She was very attuned to emotions; maybe she felt my fear when she answered me.
Not wanting to let myself get sucked into my thoughts again, I gave Louie a hug before I exited my room in search of Robin and Dmitry. They were my only hope of having a relaxed evening in what were essentially my last hours as a human.
It took some wrong turns, but I eventually found the media room and everyone was waiting for my arrival. Even Luka and Ana, who both openly sneered at my entrance.
“No one said the stray was coming,” Ana spat.
“Didn’t think I needed to.” Dmitry flashed a wicked grin at me and grabbed the remote to get the movie started.
I hopped on the couch next to Robin and she lifted the blanket so I could snuggle in beside her. Dmitry soon plopped down beside me and his presence made my skin tingle again, even though we were barely touching. I started to get nervous that he might be trying his charming trick on me again, but then I realized we had to be looking at each other to do that and he was intently fixated on the preview trailers.
Even with Luka and Ana present, the night was enjoyable. At times, however, I felt I could almost feel the heat of Ana’s hateful stare trying desperately to make me spontaneously combust. The heat disappeared instantly when she and Luka quickly slipped out, obviously not caring to spend any more time in the same room with me. They blatantly groped each other as they exited. The rest of us sleepily made our way out of the media room after several more movies, as dawn seemed to be quickly approaching. I was shocked that I lasted two more flicks after Bruno sent in a steaming plate of lasagna for me.