"Preposterous," stammered Nigel, looking at Ruth for support.
"Then you head back to Sol, and rig it so Ruthie's baby is the perfect host for you. Not some short-lived vehicle that gets rejected after a couple of years, but a long-term place to live. But to do that, you need to alter the child when it's born, with a sample of your
original
DNA." Johnny pointed accusingly at the shreds of hair Nigel held in his hand, torn from the scalp of Kulta, his original body.
Ruthie stared in disbelief at the man who was her husband, who had been her husband.
"Oh you'd be safe now, Ruthie," said Johnny. "You'd be safe for another fifteen years, maybe. Until there's a terrible accident that leaves Mr and Mrs Less dead, though your teenager will somehow survive. And the biggest crime boss around gets a new start, with old money, and a touch of class."
"Rubbish," said Nigel.
"So let me look in your head," said Johnny. "Will I see the scar tissue where your brain meets Nigel's spine?"
"Stay away from me!"
"Tuka's gone, Alnitak," said Johnny. "There's nobody to sew you into your new body. Not now, and not in fifteen years when you need him. You're finished."
Nigel/Alnitak snatched up the Gronk. The furry creature squealed and thrashed as the man squeezed it close to his chest, pressing a white ceramic pistol to its head.
"Stay back," he yelled. "Stay back or the Gronk gets it."
"You'll never get away," said Johnny. "The police are already coming. You have no wheels, no money, no minions. This is the end of the line."
"Mister Johnny," pleaded the Gronk in a small voice. "Help."
But Johnny kept his gun trained on Nigel. He sniffed, thoughtfully. "It's only a Gronk," he said. "I can get another one."
The Gronk squealed in panic, its four arms thrashing against its captor.
"You're bluffing," said Nigel. "I've seen how much you care for this creature."
Johnny snorted in amusement. "We get through a couple of Gronks a year. They're disposable."
Nigel/Alnitak looked into Johnny's white eyes for any sign of a lie. But he saw nothing.
"Okay," said Johnny. "Maybe I'm lying."
Nigel tilted his head in confusion.
"The Gronk's like family to me. And family's very important," said Johnny. "For as long as you were family, I was ready to do anything for you. But now, you're not."
Nigel squeezed the Gronk close to his chest, pointing his gun instead at Johnny. "You won't shoot me through your alien friend," he said.
"I won't have to," said Johnny. "Look behind you."
"I'm not falling for that one," said Nigel.
"Good," said Ruth, as she stabbed a scalpel into his neck.
Nigel/Alnitak spun in surprise, dropping the Gronk as the hand that had held it reached for the knife in his neck. It was only a flesh wound, he would be fine, except that he was thinking about that, and not about the Strontium Dog that was punching him in the face.
Nigel was thrown back against the bed.
"Back," said Wulf. "I'll shoot him," but Johnny was on top of his quarry, bending his arms behind him, slapping on the cuffs.
"No way," he said. "We keep him alive. At least until we search the tanks at Tammerfors Hospital."
Ruth sat on the edge of the bed, clutching her heavy stomach. Looking at the hand that had stabbed Nigel in the neck, she waited to wake up from the weirdest dream ever.
"What for?" she breathed.
"Your husband's brain might still be there," said Johnny. "And this," he pointed at the angry body tied up on the floor, "is something he might want back."
Ruth winced.
"It's okay, sis," said Johnny, reaching out to her. "Everything's gonna be all right."
Ruth winced again, clutching at her stomach.
"No," she said. "Get a doctor. It's starting."
"Ah," said Johnny. "I'll just-"
"Now!" yelled Ruth.
BOUNDLESS
"Do you have to go?" Ruth asked.
Johnny nodded.
"I'm handing him in to the Doghouse myself," he said. "We need to keep Nigel's body safe in case his brain is still out there."
Ruth stared down at the child in her arms. "I think Marci would appreciate seeing her Dad," she said. "And I would, too," she said, trying hard not to break down.
"I'll see what I can do," said Johnny. "But Alnitak is going to be answering questions for a few months yet. Wulf and I will head back to Tammerfors as soon as we get your money for you."
"My money?"
Johnny smiled. "There is a big bounty on Alnitak, and Tuka. Plenty to keep you covered here on Mars."
"Johnny," said Ruth, with a smile, "I'm a rich woman."
"As Ruth Kreelman Less, you are," said Johnny. "Let's see you stay as Ruth Webster for a while. Try not to go anywhere near the relatives."
She nodded, understanding. "I'll lay low," she said.
"Look after Marci," said Johnny.
"As if I wouldn't," she smiled. "Thanks, Johnny."
"You look out for me," said Johnny. "I'll look out for you."
Ruthie kissed him on the cheek. "Take care," she said, and turned away. She was through her tears, waving behind her as she headed back towards the maternity ward. Johnny watched her go, and then headed for the taxis.
The space station spun slowly, but it still made people feel woozy. Johnny already felt half drunk when he walked into the half-empty bar at the Wheel of Fortune. There were no new bounty announcements for another ten minutes, so he took a seat by a window screen that showed Earth up close and fished out the paper photo. It had to be paper because it was something he wanted to stare at a lot.
There she was, Marci Diana. Marci Diana Less... No, he guessed it was Marci Diana Webster for as long as the alias held. She was just a little mite, but she had fighting spirit, like her mother, Ruth. And like her uncle, Johnny. The jury was still out on what her genes were like, but she was loved all the same.
Johnny looked away from the paper photo at the screen, squinting at the image it presented for just a moment. Earth spread out below him, all blues and greens, and after seeing so many strangely coloured worlds it seemed almost mundane. Johnny tucked the picture of his newborn niece into his pocket and stared down at the world that had spawned him.
Stormclouds boiled across the face of Terra, and Johnny gave up trying to focus on the elusive video image. The only way he was going to see Earth clearly again was if he went there himself, and that wasn't going to happen any time soon. It was time to go.
The bulk of a giant Viking was momentarily outlined in the door.
"Wulf," waved Johnny. "Over here."
It was time for the new bounties. Time to head out of the Sol system again. Time for work.
About the Author
Jonathan Clements is the writer of the Strontium Dog audio dramas
Down to Earth
and
Fire From Heaven
, starring Simon Pegg as Johnny Alpha, released on CD by Big Finish and online by the BBC. His other scripts include the Judge Dredd adventures
Trapped on Titan, Pre-Emptive Revenge
, and
Solo
. He is a regular contributor to the Judge Dredd Megazine, and the author of many books including
Pirate King, Confucius
, and
A Brief History of the Vikings
.
His website is www.muramasaindustries.com.