Authors: Jo Ann Ferguson
Finally the uneasy day was drawing to a close. Earlier Brody had given her a letter which had arrived in the mail packet. He had been smiling, so she had known immediately it was a special missive. When she had seen the handwriting and the postmark, she had nearly cried with joy. It was from Hart and was the first time she had heard from home since she had come to Foxbridge Cloister. She had sent several letters, but it was likely that none of them arrived in Connecticut. The transatlantic mail was notoriously slow.
Rebecca took her letter and went to her room to read it before she went to sleep. It had been a long day as she had tried to learn the multitude of duties she still had to master.
There had been good news when the gray-haired Dr. Withers had pronounced Nicholas able to get out of bed for good tomorrow. He had been up, but had been advised to take his recovery slowly. She had seen the signs of continuing improvement, but was happy when the doctor seconded her opinion.
In the past week, she and the doctor had become good friends to the point where she had been able to convince him to call her Rebecca instead of Lady Foxbridge. When he had hinted that he would be most honored to be the physician at the birth of the heir to Foxbridge Cloister, she had simply smiled. Lately, there had been a great deal of interest in this nonexistent child who, if a boy, would one day inherit his father's title.
Sitting on her bed, she unbuttoned her shoes. As eager as she was to read that note, she was more tired. She would get ready for bed, then read it before blowing out the candle. Quickly she rushed through her normal routine after she had redressed in one of the lovely nightgowns Mademoiselle Pacquette had made for her. She brushed the tangles from her hair before tying it back with a single ribbon so it cascaded down her back in a rich, chocolate river.
Her face was bright with happiness as she broke the wax on the seal at the back of the letter. Unfolding it, she began to read Hart's splendid handwriting. Her smile faded as she saw this note did not contain news from home, but had been written shortly after she had left with Nicholas and was the confirmation of what she had fought so long to believe was untrue. Now that it no longer mattered, she was forced to see the reality she had denied so vehemently.
Dear Rebecca
,
I am writing this letter to tell you what you should have known long ago. First, let me say I am sorry. What I did was wrong and more cruel to you than any childish prank I teased you with when we were young. At the time, I thought you would not be unhappy with the situation. I had no idea that you loved Nicholas, or I would never have done what I did. Instead I would have faced my own problems in my own way. The sacrifice I asked of you was too great.
Now I can explain that my support for your marriage to Keith Bennett was not entirely voluntary. During the war years when the harvests were lean, I borrowed money from him so we could eat. When he demanded payment, I did not have enough set aside to pay him back. I asked for more time. In another season, there would have been more than enough to settle my debts and for us to survive on until the next harvest.
He offered me an alternative. He wanted you. Forgive me, sister, but I agreed to the plan for him to court you. I know you had great affection for him, but he was not a kind man. The image he presented at our house was not the real Keith Bennett. I know he told you he could not marry you until he had built you a home. The truth was that I insisted on the time in case of a windfall.
That is the other thing I must beg your forgiveness for, Rebecca. I found your marriage lines and letters from Nicholas one day when I was searching the house to find any money I could use to pay off Bennett. At that time, I thought your husband had married you only in order to have someone to leave his estate to when he died. That was why, when Nicholas showed up at your wedding, I did not protest once I knew who he was. I knew beforehand of that childhood marriage of yours.
Forgive me, Rebecca. By this time, I hope you are happy with Nicholas and have forgotten a man who wed Shirley Fitch two weeks after you left. Her father has the money Bennett craves. Although how he knew to do it I will never guess, the money Nicholas left has gotten Bennett off my and Aunt Dena's back, so all is well with us. Tell him he has our gratitude for what he did to help us when he had no reason to do so, other than his marriage to you.
Write soon and tell us about your life as a fine lady. There is a great deal of curiosity here about your new life. We hope you are happy with your husband, although we miss you. Aunt Dena sends her love and told me to tell you that she wonders when she will become a great-aunt of the heir of an English lord.
I remain
Your loving brother,
Hart
The slip of paper fell from her nerveless fingers to her lap as she stared at the wall. Her first thought was that everything Nicholas had told her was true. He had told her of the deal between Hart and Keith, but she had refused to believe him. Keith had tried to ruin her life by having her believe that he loved her enough to come to England and take her back to America as his wife. He nearly had succeeded. Only Nicholas' kindness and patience had saved her from ignoring the love which had come into her life when she was too young to look for it.
From her collar, she drew the key to the connecting door. It was time for that door to be thrown open, and to put this folly of a separate life into the past where it belonged. Her life was entwined with Nicholas's life, as it had been from the moment she had discovered him in the barn.
She was surprised how her hands shook as she slipped the key into the lock. It was not fear as it would have been when she first arrived. She quivered with the anticipation of a loving life with her husband. She gasped as the door opened before she could turn the doorknob.
On the other side of the doorway, dressed in his long lounging coat over his breeches, stood Nicholas. He smiled at her expression of astonishment. “You have no idea of the number of nights I have lain awake waiting for the sound of that key turning uselessly in the latch. The door has never been locked, Rebecca. That key does nothing. If there was a key to this door, it disappeared years ago.”
“It has never been locked?” Undisguised shock muted her voice.
“No, my love. The only thing that has been locked away has been your heart. Are you offering it to me tonight?”
She stepped forward to put her fingers against his chest bared by his open jacket. “Do you want my badly patched, foolish heart, Nicholas? Can you love a woman as silly as I have been?”
“Darling, I have loved you for nearly five years. First as a sweet child, then as the lovely woman you are now.” He drew her into his room and closed the door behind her. “Tell me again that you love me, too, Rebecca. I never can hear those words from your lips often enough.”
“Nicholas, I love you. I cannot help it, although I have been trying to fight it because I felt obligated to Keith. This changed that.” She handed him the letter.
After he read it, he asked, “Are you coming to me for love or from loneliness?”
“For love. You know I love you. I am so glad I told you days ago, so you would not think that you are a second choice for me.” She grinned, impishly. “Don't you know you have always been the first one with me? My first patient, my first husband and,” she said, as her voice softened to the texture of warm butter melting in the sunshine, “now I want you to be my first lover. Love me, please, Nicholas. I am tired of being your wife in name only.”
“My lady, your wish is mine. Although I shan't be able to hold you as easily as I would want, tonight you will become
my
Lady Foxbridge.”
Taking her hand in his, he led her to his bed that dwarfed hers. When they stood next to it, he kissed her in the way she could not forget. Her arms slipped around his waist as he held her close to him.
“Where does it hurt too bad for me to touch you?” she breathed into his hair as he tantalized her skin with his lightning-quick kisses.
“I would like to say nowhere, but that isn't true.” He gazed down into her eyes. “My left shoulder and upper arm. Anywhere else will be wonderful, darling.”
When he leaned her back onto the bed, her hands drew him down to rest over her on the cool sheets. His fingers slowly untied the ribbon holding her hair in its maidenly style. After tonight, sweet Rebecca would be a maiden no longer.
He was smiling broadly as he kissed her once again. What he had waited for during long months was about to come true. His fingers slipped along the slender line of her body before settling gently on the sweet softness of her breast. When she gave a breathy sound of pleasure, his tongue took possession of her mouth.
Beneath him, she was learning every bit of his male body as he pressed her to the mattress. Her eyes closed as she savored the sensations buffeting her body. All of her centered on the touch of his fingers and the caresses of his mouth. Remembering the wistful yearning in his voice when he told of how she could touch him almost anywhere, she slipped her hands beneath the looseness of his jacket to touch the smooth skin of his back. As he began to explore the bare skin above the neckline of her nightgown, she answered his passion with the heat of her own.
When he stood, she looked up at him in sudden concern. “What is wrong?”
He laughed at the tremor of mixed desire and fear in her voice. “Nothing can be wrong now, my love.” He moved to the window and pulled open the drapes. “I just want the moonlight to brighten your loveliness. Such beauty should never be enjoyed in darkness.”
Her eyes widened as he threw his jacket onto the nearest chair and unbuttoned his breeches. In the silhouette against the glow from the window, she saw the strong line of his male body which soon would be part of hers and bring her a love she could not imagine. Kneeling on the bed, she lifted her nightgown over her head and dropped it to the floor. She could feel no maidenly shyness when she wanted to feel his skin against hers.
Holding out her arms to him, she watched as he crossed the floor to her. He ran his hand along the supple smoothness of her skin. As if his touch was a pebble and she was an untouched pond, the stroke of his fingers sent ever-increasing ripples of rapture along her body. As he had before, he kissed her with feather-soft kisses along her face. The yearning to be held to his hard body overwhelmed her until she thought she would beg him to love her.
Suddenly, with a sigh of longing, he pushed her back into the mattress as his mouth captured hers and asked for her love wordlessly. The new, luscious sensation of his naked body pressed to hers caused an explosion of unrecognizable feelings through her. So heady were the delights that she was not aware of her own voice speaking of the love she had for him.
He felt her body quivering beneath his and knew she was being conquered by the love she had tried to refute for too long. Once she surrendered to it, she could not control her own emotions which were erupting outward to help him share in her joy. When he felt her slender hands seek to discover him, he learned that the fire he had seen burning in her eyes was a reflection of the conflagration blazing deep within her.
“Teach me,” she whispered. “You said before that you would teach me to love you.”
“The best way to learn is by doing what brings pleasure to you and to me, sweetheart.” He gasped as her fingers touched him enticingly. “You know best already.”
He stopped her from speaking by lowering his mouth to the round surface of her breast. As his tongue climbed its gentle slopes, he felt her reaction in his mouth and against him as her body began to move with the rhythm that invited him to join her in the paradise of their love. He was in no hurry. He wanted to sample each treat she had for him.
His fingers swept along the firm surface of her legs which had been visible to him too seldom. No part of her was hidden by heavy clothes and her loyalty to a man who did not love her. As his hands moved upward to caress her, she gasped in unrestrained passion.
“I love you so much,” she breathed into his ear which was close to her mouth as he continued to explore the flavors of her skin.
“I love you.” He smiled as he felt her body grow warm with the unconstrained flame brightening her face with ecstasy.
Moving carefully so not to injure his shoulder and not to give her anything but joy, he raised his body over hers to bring them together. Lost in his own world of rapture, he did not notice as her hands wrapped around his neck to bring him deeper into her ardent body which ached for his love. His mouth took hers to feel the heat of her breaths deep in his throat.
Together they sought the fulfillment of the love born so long ago. She felt him move against her and set loose all conscious thoughts as she submerged herself into a warm ocean of bliss. Each wave of wondrous sensation lifted her higher into ecstasy until she reached beyond the silver-lined clouds to the sun. In its heated depths, she exploded into a million pieces of stardust, sparkling in the reflected light of their love.
When Rebecca opened her eyes, the silvery shimmer of the pale moon lit her life. She felt Nicholas' lips against her neck where her pulse was wildly reacting to the love which had taken them past the bounds of her imagination. Closing her eyes, she savored the feelings. “I didn't know,” she whispered.
He gazed down into her face surrounded by her messed hair, which was a living shadow against the pillowcases. Lightly, he kissed her. “You didn't know what, sweetheart?”
She ran her fingers along his face that was partially obscured by a day's growth of black whiskers. “I didn't know it would feel like this.”
“Neither did I!” He laughed as he saw the expression of disbelief on her face. “It is the truth, Rebecca. There have been others in my past, but I did not love them as I love you. Without this love we share in our hearts, there cannot be the thrill to share with our bodies. Will you sleep here with me tonight, sweetheart?”