Read Questing Sucks (Book 1) Online

Authors: Kevin Weinberg

Tags: #Fantasy

Questing Sucks (Book 1) (23 page)

BOOK: Questing Sucks (Book 1)
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Orellia looked bewildered, a strand of her red hair falling from her face and dangling before her eyes. She blew it out of the way. “Keep going.”

Shina really didn’t want to remember such a ridiculous story. A tale of extreme stupidity, yet, her Mistress had commanded her.

“It started like this,” she began. “Sehn had spent too long in the sun one day, and got a very small sunburn. It’s very common in Elvar during the summer, but Sehn did not see it that way. To him, he believed that the sun had done it on purpose, and was challenging Sehn to a war or something. That’s right, my brother declared war on the sun. He spent the next four months planning on…it’s so ridiculous, please don’t make me keep going.”

Orellia smiled, and spoke with an encouraging voice. “It is fine, Shina. Please, continue.”

Shina shrugged, and finished the story. “Well, my brother made plans to blow up the sun. He would yell at it at night, asking it to come closer and fight him, screaming and saying things like ‘you dare give the Great Sehn a sunburn’ and other nonsense. Well, most of us in Elvar thought nothing of it. He had a history of doing things like this, but this time ended up differently.”

She shuddered as she remembered, and continued to speak. “Sehn actually managed to build a bomb, using Dwarven technology. To this day I don’t know how he figured it out, but he did. It was a large, round thing, made up of different stuff none of us in Elvar knew anything about. You see, Mistress, Sehn is so arrogant that in his mind he actually believed he could throw something hard enough that it would travel to the sun. All he ended up doing, was creating a massive explosion in Oakley, exploding ten homes, and luckily only breaking his legs. No one was home at the time, which was a blessing of Goddess Helena. The wood, and charcoal, and all the other stuff spilled into the water supply, and no one was able to drink from it for two weeks. So, now do you see why Sehn is better off left alone?”

Orellia remained silent for a moment, her chin resting on her thumbs, deep in thought. “I still think we can tame him, though if what you’re saying is true, I’m not looking forward to it. Pack your bags, Shina, we’re leaving at once. If your brother is as stubborn as you say, perhaps your presence will make his return easier.”

I doubt it,
she wanted to say, but chose to submit and drop the argument. Shina walked over to the window in the corner of the Seeing Chamber, and looked out of it. Even after four years, she’d never get used to the breathtaking locale of the Order. Floating miles above the ground, on over seventy separate buildings, the Order was the most wondrous place in the world. They traveled from building to building by gryphon, large winged beasts with a playful and friendly demeanor. Shina had fallen in love with the creatures when she’d first arrived.

Every free moment Shina had, she always made time to look out of a window, no matter where in the Order she was. Every building had a view of at least a few dozen others, and a spectacular view of the clouds they lived amongst. On clear days, she could sometimes see down to the surface, an ever-changing sight as the Order’s hovering city was constantly moving. Today, they were hovering over a beautiful blue ocean.

I don’t wanna leave,
she thought bitterly.
I don’t wanna go back to the surface and
hafta
deal with my dumb brother!

Shina did not like speaking with either Elven or Human formality, but when addressing her Mistress, she always spoke in complete and Human-formal sentences. Seeing her friend Kellar approach from behind, she dropped her mask of professionalism and let out a delighted gasp.

“Kellar, you’re back from the hunt early!” she said with cheer. “What’cha doing?”

“Hey, Shina,” he said. The tall Human boy was muscular, with two golden rings symbolizing the passing of his twelfth birthday, a long-going tradition of his Drashian culture. He was strong, but around Shina he was always gentle. He had dark brown hair, short trimmed and always kept neat and combed. He was wearing a black robe, and his dreamy blue eyes made her heart warm.

Do Humans like Elven girls?
Shina wondered. She had a secret crush on the boy, but was petrified to say anything to him. For one, he was among the most powerful Mages in their age group, immensely popular around the Order. Secondly, Shina knew she had no chance with such a cool, gorgeous hunk, even if he did like Elven girls. After all, with his level of popularity, he could have any girl in the Order. Why would he be interested in boring old Shina?

“Did you capture the Dwarves?” Shina asked, trying to keep her voice smooth and even.

“Yep, you bet,” Kellar said. “They tried to run, but I stopped them in their tracks.” Kellar was amazing. Only twelve years of age, and already he was sent on solo missions, capturing new Mages all on his own.

“I hear you’re going after two more. This is your first hunt, right? I’m proud of you, Shina.”

He just said he’s proud of me!
She thought with an anxious jolt in her stomach.

Shina was so happy, that she didn’t even realize the lightning crackling from her legs and feet. Everyone knew she got “sparky” when she was being emotional, and she looked on with embarrassment as Kellar took notice. Some people blushed—Shina merely sent a million volts in every direction.

“Something bothering you?” he asked.

“I-it’s nothing!” she shot back.

“Well, I’ve got some good news, Shina. I’m coming with you and Mistress Orellia. She told me she couldn’t find anyone else to be your third, and I like getting out. We’ll have fun!”

Shina wondered how it was possible for a boy to have such dreamy eyes, but she shook the thought from her head. She realized she was only a moment from drooling, and then she’d really look like a fool in front of her friend.

I get to be on a hunt with Kellar!
She thought.

The happiness didn’t last; she remembered who it was they were hunting. A dark look crossed her face.

Sehn is going to embarrass the hell out of me! I can’t let the two meet. That will kill me inside.

“Are you sure you want to go? I mean, you just came back from a hunt. Maybe you should rest a bit, ya know?”

“Hmm?” Kellar said. “Do you not want me to come along, Shina?”

Gyah!
Shina screamed in her mind.
I totally just made it look bad for myself.

“Of course I want you to go!”

“Well, then you better get packing. We’re leaving in an hour.”

Shina gulped, and worked up all the courage she could muster. “Do you think…we should ride on the same gryphon? I only ask because I know yours is too tired to make another journey, and I think mine would be better than having to get used to a strange animal.”

Shina had to struggle for everything she was worth not send out a billion jolts while she waited for his reply. Luckily, he answered in an instant. “Sounds cool, I’m off to pack. See ya!”

Shina almost feinted. She’d be riding on the same gryphon as Kellar!

Sehn,
she thought with a dark anger.
You better not embarrass me.

 

 


How the fuck did this happen?”
Sehn shouted, hanging upside down with his foot stuck in the bark of a tree.

“You did this to yourself,” Saerina answered. “You got angry when Nero said that possums are the best at hanging upside down from trees, and you once again made yourself look like a fool.”

“Fuck possums!” Sehn yelled. “They’re the ones that had the nerve to challenge Sehn to a tree-hanging war!”

Patrick rode up alongside Saerina, and yelled at Sehn. “Dammit Sehn, why is it every time I travel with you, you always end up getting into fights with the wilderness? Just for once, I’d like to go through a forest without you ending up hanging upside down from a tree!”

Sehn grumbled to himself, and ignored the foolish peasants. He knew he’d beaten those stupid Possums. They’d go and tell their stupid Possum friends what happens when you challenge the Great Sehn!

 

 
Chapter 24: Confrontation

 

 

For what seemed like the thousandth time, Sehn was bitten by yet another insect, something that would result in an itchy red bump that'd last a few days. At first he was dealing with the situation, content to randomly light trees on fire as they passed along the narrowing section of forest, but Saerina started up again about the whole ‘respecting magic’ nonsense.

Princess Saerina had been riding alongside Nero for the entire day, and Sehn didn’t want to let the boy out of his sight—not that he cared about him or anything, he just didn’t want Saerina to steal his disciple. Still, Sehn had to admit that he didn’t trust the princess, and he didn’t want her anywhere around Nero. Cah’lia seemed to mostly agree, looking at Sehn with approval every time he put himself between the two.

Early that morning, Sehn did one of those things that he did sometimes, that ‘thinking’ thing. It’s not that Sehn didn’t like to think—he sometimes did—but he especially didn’t like to reflect on the past. What was done, was done, yet as Sehn continued to travel toward the treasure, things didn’t seem to be adding up.

For one, why did the princess insist on bringing Nero along? At first, Sehn was sure it was just an attempt to steal away his greatest disciple instead of finding her own, but now he was beginning to realize there was more to it. Nero had used magic, something that Sehn felt both proud and frightened of. Oddly, Sehn wasn’t frightened because he feared the boy would become more powerful than him and take his place, he was frightened because he worried that Nero might hurt himself, or…

I am not!
I am only upset about Nero having magic, because now I have competition. That’s the only reason. It is!

They were riding much slower than usual. Now that they were in the middle of the forest, the terrain had become very difficult to ride over, and one misstep could trip the horse and possibly even kill the rider.

Saerina had not taken her eyes off of the two since early that morning, when Nero had casted his first spell.

“Boys,” she said. Her words were directed to them, yet she kept her eyes straight ahead of her while she rode, both addressing and ignoring them at the same time. It was discomforting to say the least.

“How would you two like to learn a new spell?”

Sehn and Nero answered at the same time.

“Absolutely not!” Sehn spat.

“Yes, please!” Nero begged.

Sehn glared at Nero. “Disciple, I command you to refuse her request at once!”

Cah’lia, overhearing the conversation from where she was riding a few feet ahead of them, rushed over to join the three. “And I, as your sister, command you as well.”

Sehn gave Cah’lia a disapproving glance, and Cah’lia sighed. “But only as a secondary command, which weighs less than Sehn’s primary command, happy?”

Sehn nodded. “That is sufficient, Cah’lia, and I thank you for correcting yourself. As a reward, I will only ask you to remove one kidney instead of two, for having attempted to overshadow my command with your own.”

Cah’lia ignored him, and continued to stare at Saerina, who seemed content to keep her eyes forward, and look none of them in the eyes.

“It’s not a dangerous spell,” she said. “It’s one that can harm no one.”

“Well then I’m
definitely
not interested in it,” Sehn grunted.

Saerina stopped riding for a moment, ordering her horse to a halt. Cah’lia and Nero followed in suit, with Sehn riding past them. How dare he be expected to stop just because someone else did? When he realized they weren’t going to follow him, he shouted a curse, and swung his horse around to rejoin the three of them.

“I know you’re our princess,” Cah’lia said. “And I know that you stand leagues above us as a noble and respected ruler. But I’ve been thinking lately. Nero is my brother, and even if I have to raise a hand to our own nobility, I’ll do it if I must, if it means protecting him. Gods help me, but I will.”

Saerina did not seem taken aback by Cah’lia’s words. There was fear on Cah’lia’s face, for it was obvious even to Sehn, that she was worried about the consequences of what she’d just said to the princess.

“You seem surprised,” Saerina said. “You look shocked that I’m not yelling, or even reprimanding you for your treasonous words. If you will learn one thing about me, then let it be this. As you have no doubt witnessed with Sehn, I, unlike most people in this world, care little for words. With most people it’s the other way around. Most will fight to the death over a muttered insult, but be perfectly content to allow hatred in the hearts of their subjects, if only they would show proper respect. That is not me, however. It is what can be found within the heart that matters to me, and nothing else. Nothing you can ever say will cause me to react harshly with either you
or
Sehn, and like I have said earlier, if such were the case, I’d have killed Sehn when I first met him.”

Cah’lia’s ears twitched as she spoke, and Sehn knew she was considering the woman’s words. “If your brother does not practice his ability to call upon Her Grace, then it is possible he may do so unintentionally, or accidentally, in a way that can be harmful, or perhaps even fatal. He need not practice anything dangerous, and it is for this reason I’d have him learn the spells of rain.”

Cah’lia leaned in close and whispered in the princess’s ears. Sehn had to strain to hear her words. “Can you promise me that he won’t be harmed? If you can read my heart, then you should know that if you brought him any harm, I’d kill you, even if you are our princess. That is of course, if Sehn did not get to you first.”

Sehn decided not to deny the claims. He was beginning to realize more and more that they were true. Of course,
only
because Nero was his disciple and he didn’t wish to find another. The princess nodded at her, offering a whispered promise.

“Fine,” Cah’lia said out loud. “Nero, I’ll let ya learn this new spell, but only if Sehn learns it too.”

Sehn laughed. “Well, I guess he’s not learning it then.”

Cah’lia walked her horse over to Sehn, and whispered something in his ear.
“Sehn,
” she whispered.
“If you don’t learn the spell with Nero, I’m going to kiss Prince Saerith, and confess my love to him.”

Sehn’s lips pulled back in anger, and it was a struggle for him not to bite down on them. He wasn’t angry at the thought of Cah’lia kissing the prince, no way! He was only angry because Cah’lia’s love would make the prince happy, and he didn’t want Saerith to be happy. It was true!

Cah’lia looked over her shoulder, and called out to Nero. “Nero, Sehn has just agreed to learn the spell with you,” she said, answering for him. Sehn made a mental note to punish Cah’lia later. No one may answer for the Great Sehn!

Nero’s ears wobbled and his lips expanded in his widest, happiest boyish smile. “Really? Yay! I love you, Sis.”

Saerina clapped her hands twice, and as if summoned, Prince Saerith rode over, looking his finest. He rode over to Cah’lia, and kissed her smooth fingers. “Good afternoon, my beauty,” he told her. Cah’lia blushed.

“A-Afternoon, my prince,” Cah’lia said with a fluttery voice.

“Brother, I need you to inform the rest of our party that we’ll be camping here early for the night. It is of great importance that I spend time with Sehn and Nero.”

“Very well. Cah’lia,” he said. “Perhaps you might join me for a drink while my sister takes care of whatever business she is conducting with the two boys?”

Did he just call me a boy?
Sehn thought.

Odd thoughts that Sehn had never before encountered, came barging into his mind at a rush. For the first time in his life, he was comparing his own looks to another person’s. A fearful thought came to him.

Gods, he is better looking than me! And he’s rich. And he owns a fucking castle! Cah’lia’s going to love him…not that I care or anything, but Gods, I hate him so much.

Sehn wanted to rip off the prince’s ears, and cook them in a campfire. He and his sister changed their clothing twice daily, and today he was wearing yet another outrageous outfit. He wore a red vest, woven from the finest fabric, complementing his dark and piercing gaze. Golden chains hung from his neck, with ornate rings of mixed diamond and aquamarine on each finger. How in the hell was Sehn supposed to compete with that?

Aha!
Sehn thought with a blazing triumph.
I get it now, it all makes sense. I don’t love Cah’lia. Hah! That would be ridiculous. I’m just trying to win a love-war, that’s all. After all, the Great Sehn loses at nothing, not even love. It’s perfectly manly and acceptable for me to compete over Cah’lia, because if I don’t, then I’ll have lost at something, which cannot happen!

Thinking of these things, Sehn finally had the courage to do what he’d only dreamt of, something he'd wanted for so, so long. Sehn leaped from his horse, and walked with a calm determination over to the prince and Cah’lia.

“A most blessed afternoon to thee, my good prince, champion of Her Grace,” Sehn began in his best formality. “Whether sun or stars, rain or fire, blessed the day be to thee, for whilst mine own body stands before thee, let it be known. In the presence of mine prince, truly thou hath been blessed. Thou art a champion to all. Too, am I, grateful to be humbled by your eternal light.”

The prince looked flabbergasted, his mouth hanging open. He was quick to regain his composure. “I offer my thanks to thee, Sehn, son of Suhn.”

“Oh, and one more thing,” Sehn remarked with a smile.

“Yes?” The prince leaned in closer to listen.

Before anyone could react, with a blinding and maddening rage, Sehn grabbed the pompous fool by the shirt, and threw him off of his horse. The prince screamed as he hit the ground, his priceless clothing being soiled by filthy mud.

Cah’lia put a hand to her mouth and gasped, Nero following with a similar gesture. Patrick and Rillith, only a few feet away, also had a similar reaction to the sight of such overwhelming treachery. Only Saerina seemed to be unsurprised.

Sehn leaned in close, pulling the prince up into a sitting position, and forcing the Elf to meet his enraged gaze.

“Listen to me, you little fuck!” Sehn shouted at him. “If I ever see you smile at Cah’lia, if I ever see you kiss her hand, if I ever see you so much as wink at the woman, I swear to the Gods and heaven above, that I shall rip out your still beating heart, and
eat it in front of you!
Do I make myself clear, Prince Saerith?”

Daniel had been walking over with a bag of feed for the horses. He dropped it to the ground, wasting a week’s supply of feed as he looked upon the situation with a morbid terror. Saerith pushed Sehn off of him, and stood to his feet, drawing his sword. His eyes were so filled with outrage and disgust, that to Sehn it looked like they were actually casting out a visible red light. His nose curled, and his eyes narrowed in the purest expression of thunderous uproar that Sehn had ever seen on a person, Elf, Human, or Dwarf.

BOOK: Questing Sucks (Book 1)
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