Private Indiscretions (14 page)

She kept her head down through the sumptuous lobby, then bounced nervously as she rode the elevator to his floor. Her reflection in the mirrored walls startled her. She looked happy and hopeful, which were both true. She wasn't going to try to seduce him, but to tell him she loved him. No pressure, just the facts. She hoped it would make him as happy as it did her.

His door was at the end of the hall. It was so quiet as she walked that she could hear her own heart beating like something out of Poe. Just when she reached his door, it opened, making her step back.

He stood there, dressed in jeans and a sweater, a set of keys in his hand.

“Did you just come from Haight-Ashbury?” he asked, his eyebrows lifting.

She did look reminiscent of the hippie era, she realized, although cleaner.

“Sam.” Her voice shook. It was all she could do not to blurt out her feelings. She took another breath and tried again. “May I come in?”

He stepped back and opened the door, tucking his keys in his pocket, then shutting the door behind her.

She looked around the sitting room, not really seeing much. “Sam.” She stopped, started again. What if he rejected her? “You can refuse what I'm offering or you can accept it. I don't have any control over your choice. But you're not leaving this city and my life without knowing how I feel. I—”

He put his fingers to her lips. Before she had a chance to come up with the right words, he backed her against the door and kissed her, long and deep and hard, with a kind of desperation that stole her breath. He dragged her cap off her hair, plucked her glasses off and tossed them onto a nearby chair.

“I couldn't work,” he said between kisses. “I kept thinking of you. Wanting you. I was just leaving to come to you. I'm sorry about tonight,” he said as he peeled her pullover up her body then flung it aside.

“Me, too,” she whispered back, shoving his sweater up and over his head, tossing it in the general direction of hers. What she had to say could wait. She wanted this. Needed this.

He framed her face with his hands. His eyes held her captive. “I didn't want this to happen. I need to focus because I'm missing something big, and I can't shake the feeling I'm missing it because I can't free my mind of you, of worrying about you. But I need you. This.”

“I'm glad,” she said, warmth infusing her. “I'm so glad.”

“God.” He hauled her close, held her for a long time, then he backed away and undressed as she watched.

“Let me be the one this time,” she said, giving him a shove toward the bed.

She liked how he stretched out, waiting, watching her, not closing his eyes when she knelt over him. She liked how he tasted and how he felt, hard and soft at the same time but differently. He was hot against her tongue. He
moved in short, sharp lifts. His hands clenched the sheet. She liked that, too, and the sounds he made…

She offered him pleasure with a heart full of love but without obligation. What will be, will be. But he wouldn't leave without knowing what it meant to be loved by her.

His fingertips pressed into her head, stopping her before she was ready to stop. “I have to be inside you,” he said, dragging her over him, fisting her hair in his hands, finding her mouth in a wet, open kiss that lasted forever, changing directions, deepening by the moment, the longest kiss she'd ever known.

When she couldn't catch her breath, she sat up, straddling his hips, and pulled her T-shirt over her head. She was naked underneath.

“How unsenatorial,” he said, covering her breasts, circling his thumbs around her nipples. He drew her down until he could taste her. “You feel so damn good, Dana,” he said, rough and low. “But your jeans are killing me.”

“I'm sorry.” She tried to move off him.

“No. They don't hurt. The rubbing against me…and you moving. It's more than I can…”

He let the words trail off as he sat her up and unzipped her pants. “Why, Senator Sterling. No panties, either.”

“I was in a hurry.”

“Uh-huh.” He flipped her onto her back and moved down the bed. “Hiking boots? When was the last time you went hiking?”

He dragged his tongue along the skin revealed by her open zipper as he plucked at her shoelaces.

“In college,” she said when the first boot hit the ground. “Once.”

He laughed, low. “Well, the outdoorsy look suits you, in case you were wondering.”

“I was worried.”

The other boot bounced on the floor, then his gaze turned serious again as he pulled off her jeans along with her socks. He settled between her legs and put his mouth
against her, sliding his hands under her, lifting her, dipping his thumbs inside as he worked his magic with his tongue. She couldn't remember ever feeling so free. She had no doubts, no hesitation. Again and again he brought her up, pulling away just before she was about to crest only to take her up again and higher. He had her begging. Still he controlled the moment until he was ready to let her soar.

And soar she did, almost beyond consciousness.

She didn't come down all the way but leveled off still needing him. She pushed him onto his back again, climbed over him and lowered herself to his hips. She leaned down, letting her hair drift over his chest.

“Protection?” she asked, nipping at an earlobe.

“In the dresser. Top drawer.”

She walked across the room, aware of him watching her, feeling desired and desirable. When she started back with the packet in her hand, he raised up on his elbows.

“Stop,” he said.

For a moment she was afraid he was going to back out, then she recognized the heat in his eyes. He just wanted to look at her. As foreplay it worked amazingly well.

“Come over here,” he said, his voice gruff.

“Need something?” She smiled, moved forward, straddled him again, unrolled the condom down him. He held her by her hips, lifted her onto him, lowered her slowly, both of them holding their breaths until he was deep into her, stretching her beyond what she thought possible. He helped her find the rhythm, then his eyes glazed.

“I love you,” she said as she exploded from inside, shattering her world while finding a new place for her at the same time. With him.

He stopped momentarily then gathered her close and rolled with her, staying connected until he found his own release, his breathing labored, his muscles hard.

He didn't relax against her but climbed out of bed and went into the bathroom, shutting the door. Dana sighed, at peace. He could be angry or wary or frustrated by her an
nouncement but she wasn't going to let him chase her away. She pulled the sheet to her shoulders.

She heard the water run then stop. Some time passed. When he came out, he had a towel wrapped around his waist and a robe over his arm. He sat on the bed, facing her, and passed her the robe. He'd splashed water on his face.

“This is what I've been afraid of,” he said.

Ignoring the robe, she smiled, feeling serene. “I'm not apologizing. I love you.”

“You're attached to me because of the circumstances.”

“That's why I can't sleep? Can't eat? All I think about is you.” She wasn't going to let him get away with rationalizing her feelings. They were hers and she had a right to them.

“It's the circumstances.”

“It's love.”

“I'm the first man you've been with for years, that's all.”

“Bull. I haven't been with anyone because no one interested me. Until you. I'm not expecting anything from you. This is a purely selfish gesture. I need you to know how I feel, because if this is the last night I have with you, I'm not going to spend my life regretting that I wasn't honest.”

“I think you should get dressed and go home.”

She settled back into the pillows. “I'm not going anywhere. I'm sleeping with you tonight. I'm going to make love with you at least two more times. I'm going to make you whimper.”

She finally succeeded in wiping the doomsday expression from his face. “Whimper?”

“Oh, yeah.”

He looked interested. She sat up, letting the sheet fall to her waist. “I know you're confused,” she said, climbing to her knees and wrapping her arms around his neck. “A part of you wants to throw me out and never see me again,
because I shake up your world too much. Another part wants to have sex right this second, because making love with someone who loves you makes the sex so much better.” She kissed him, tenderly, lovingly. “And yet another part of you wants to spend the night in my arms, talking and confiding and comforting and being comforted, because that kind of intimacy has been missing from your life. By your own choice, no doubt, not because other women haven't loved you.”

“No one has.”

“I'll bet you're wrong. You scared them away, that's all.” She pressed a kiss to one eye then the other, his temples, his jaw, and finally his lips, which clung to hers harder than she would have expected. It gave her hope. “Well, you can't scare me.”

“I need to keep sorting through my notes,” he said as she reached between them and pulled the towel away. “I'm missing—” he hesitated as she climbed into his lap, facing him “—an element in the equation.”

“Later,” she murmured. “Much, much later.”

He settled her against him. “You're expecting a lot out of me this soon after—”

“I am.” She laughed, low and warm. “Tonight you're all mine.”

And tonight was a good start.

S
he had made him whimper.

Sam recalled the moment with bemusement. Dana slept, her cheek against his chest, his chin resting on her hair, her leg tucked between his, as if they'd slept together a thousand times. Her perfume was masked by the soap from their shower, but she still smelled like Dana.

He'd lost track of the number of times she said she loved him. At one particularly vulnerable moment he'd voiced his fear. “You're only making it worse.”

“For you or for me?” she'd replied.

He suspected for both of them, but before he could answer she framed his face with her hands and looked deep into his eyes. “Don't try to tell me how I feel. If this is all I get, I'll take it and be happy with it. But is it enough for you?”

He'd been inside her at the time, so rational thinking wasn't in play. At that moment what they had seemed enough. But now? In the dark of night with her breathing
softly and her trust so obvious in the way she slept soundly in his arms? He didn't know.

And was he thinking relationship…or more?

He needed to be done with the job so that he could see the big picture again. Before she'd arrived at his hotel room, he'd charted everything he knew about the case, evidence and speculation. The answer was there. Somewhere. Earlier he hadn't been able to focus on it for worrying about Dana, how he'd left her at her house. He could think now, knowing she was here, safe.

Sam eased out of bed, pulling the covers over her shoulders, tucking the pillows around her. She made a sleepy sound, but didn't awaken. He scooped up his robe from the floor and shrugged into it, then gathered his papers. He hadn't bothered to turn off the light in the sitting room before they fell asleep. Settling there, he tried not to rustle pages.

He ran down the list of most obvious people who wouldn't want her to run for office, most of the names provided by Abe, the reasons why they would be suspect listed, as well as the reason for their elimination. In some cases, only a name was written down because they didn't have enough information to say yea or nay. That list included her same-party candidate as well as the one from the opposing party. Sam put red stars next to their names.

Dana must have enemies. A spurned lover of Randall's. A former employee. A colleague. Randall's lawyer had provided names of women who'd had long-term relationships with Randall but could offer no reason why they wouldn't want Dana to continue Randall's legacy. Two of the women were married and had children now. One he couldn't track down.

A separate page listed people with personal rather than political motives. The list was short. First, Hilda. He added a red star to her name because Dana told him how this was only the second time Hilda hadn't taken her days off. Did
she need to be home on Monday to complete something she'd started? What possible reason could she have?

Then there was Harley—a star by his name, too, but not a red one. He presented a different threat…

Sam went still. He underlined Harley's name, then again, his pen slicing the paper. A different threat, but tied to the original?

It made sense. It made perfect sense.

His pulse revved.

“You should be too worn out to be thinking.” Dana's voice was husky with sleep and sexy as hell. She stood in the bedroom doorway, naked and beautiful.

Deciding not to share his speculations with her, he tossed aside the papers and approached her. She smiled leisurely.

“Something you want, Senator?”

“Well, as long as you're up,” she said, her smile taking on a sultry curve. She walked her fingers down his chest, untied his robe then kept going. “Or will be soon.”

“You're insatiable.”

She looped her arms around his neck, drawing him close. “Lucky you.”

 

Dana bit back a groan as she stepped into her office at 7:00 a.m. Her in-basket held a foot-high stack of paperwork. She'd noticed an equivalent pile on Maria's desk, as well, which would make its way onto Dana's before the day was done. Not to mention anything else left over from her staff because of her absence on Friday.

She tucked her purse into her bottom desk drawer, hung up her jacket and dug into the stack. Maria had arrived before Dana and soon brought coffee and a few minutes of conversation about her weekend. Abe came in shortly thereafter, and they met with the door closed for a few minutes.

After Abe left, Dana leaned back in her chair and let herself think about the night in Sam's hotel room. She'd chipped away at some of his resistance, she thought, but far from all of it. He was back to his intense self this morn
ing, a man with a purpose, although he didn't tell her what that purpose was, only that he would be investigating a new angle. He kissed her goodbye with an unexpected fierceness, then walked her to the hotel garage at 5:00 a.m., reminding her that he'd meet her at her office parking structure to follow her home after work. The banquet started at 6:00 p.m. with a no-host bar, then dinner at six forty-five, followed by the awards and presentations. He would drive her there.

What happens after tonight, Sam?

The question dogged her. If the day went by without any action on the threat, would he leave, figuring it was just a hoax? If they discovered who was behind the plan, would he turn everything over to Abe…and leave? She didn't win either way.

He hadn't even asked what her plans were for when her term expired.

Her chin in her hand, Dana tapped her pen on the desktop. She'd lied when she said she'd be happy with last night, but what else could she do? She couldn't hold him against his will. After they'd dealt with the blackmail they would have time to concentrate on them.

Maria came in.

“I'm done with those,” Dana said, pointing to three folders.

“Okay.” She tucked them under her arm. “There's a man in the lobby who says he's a friend of yours. A Harley Bonner. His name doesn't show up on the master list.”

No, it wouldn't. He hadn't contributed. And he wasn't a friend.

“Ask Abe to step in, would you, please?” Dana said to Maria.
We'll let Mr. Bonner cool his heels a little while.

“Do you want to call Sam?” Abe asked after they'd talked.

“I want to keep Harley waiting but not that long. I don't even know what Sam's up to. He's got something going.”

“I can stay.”

“I don't think he'll open up if you do. But I want to close my door so that no one else hears what's going on. Let's leave the intercom open between my office and yours. That way, you can monitor. Maybe you should tape our conversation?”

“Illegal without telling him.”

She stared at him.

“But, okay,” he added.

Dana waited until Abe said he was ready then she sent for Harley. He carried his hat and wore a white western shirt, complete with pearl snaps and a bolo tie with a silver steer-horns clasp. It was hard to believe he was only a year older than she. He'd aged infinitely more, carrying weight that was no longer muscle, his ruddy face lined. He'd been a good-looking and surprisingly popular boy in high school, yet Sam, who'd had a monstrous upbringing, had turned out much better than this pillar-of-the-community's son.

“Hello, Dana,” he said amiably, twisting his hat in his hands.

Politeness? What's this new game, Harley?
She didn't stand nor did she offer her hand. “Have a seat, Harley.”

He looked around. “Nice.”

“Out of my seven offices, I like this one best.” She took pleasure in reminding him of her status. “What do you want?”

“Look, I know we got off on the wrong foot at the reunion.”

Dana leaned back. She held a pen in her hands and turned it over and over. “Did you honestly believe there would be a ‘right foot' between us?”

“Bygones. You know. A lotta time's gone by.”

“Some memories never die.”

“Be that as it may, the reason I asked you to dance at the reunion was to talk to you about the bill you've been workin' on in the Senate.”

“Which one? I'm working on a number of them.”

“The one from the agriculture committee.”

“You mean the Subcommittee on Marketing, Inspection and Production Promotion, of which I'm a member?”

“I guess.”

“Done your homework, have you, Harley?”

“Look, you know which one I'm talkin' about so don't go lookin' down your nose at me.”

“Are you referring to the trade act? The one which, among many other points, opens up more foreign markets for livestock sales?”

“That's it.”

“What about it?”

“It's comin' up for a recommendation when you go back to Washington. I want to know you're sayin' yes.”

“You think I'm likely to share that information with you after the way you accosted me after Mr. Giannini's funeral? Called me names? You've certainly changed your tune.”

“I apologize for that, but your personal feelings shouldn't get in the way. That bill is important to the cattle industry, which is big in this state. You represent the interests of this state.”

“I'm not the only vote.”

“From what I hear it's split. Your vote makes a difference. I'm askin' you, Dana. I'm askin' you real nice. A lot of people's livelihoods are dependin' on you makin' the right decision.”

“And if I don't?” She goaded him on purpose.
Let's see how far you'll go.

“It's gonna hurt my business bad. And bad for me is bad for Miner's Camp, and all those people I employ and the taxes I pay.”

“Well, now, Harley, I'll bet if I got into your IRS file I'd see you haven't paid a whole lot of taxes. You probably got subsidies because of drought or flood or fire. Some dramatic disaster, anyway. I'll find huge losses instead of profits. And didn't I hear Candi say your ranch is the eighth largest in California? Wasn't it number three or four while
your father was alive?”
Come on. Threaten me. Give me a reason to have you hauled off.

His face flushed redder. “We've had some hard times since my father passed.”

“Nothing you say will influence me. Nothing.”

He stood. She put down the pen and folded her hands in her lap.

“Look, little lady, if you think to vote no on this to spite me—”

“You give yourself too much credit. My vote will be determined solely by what I believe is best.” She stood as well. “You've overstayed your welcome.” Dana figured dismissing him would push him over the top.

He planted his hands on her desk. “Don't forget I know somethin' about you that a lot of folks would find interestin'.”

“That's a tired threat.”

“You watch. You'll be sorry.”

Abe rushed in the moment Harley was gone. “Do you want him stopped?”

“For what? He didn't make the threat specific. Nothing would stick. Did you get it on tape?”

“I headed in here as soon as he started to threaten you. I'll have to go check.”

“Okay. I'll give Sam a call so that he can come listen to it. Thanks, Abe. It was good knowing you were there.”

“You handled him like a pro, Senator. I'm sorry you won't be staying on.”

It had felt good to be in the driver's seat, she realized. Whoever had sent her the threats had stolen that freedom from her this past week. She didn't ever want to lose that control again.

 

In his car, Sam listened to the tape over the telephone, his fury at Harley tempered by his respect for how Dana handled him. The Senate was about to lose an amazing
woman, someone who brought poise and equanimity to the job. He wondered whether her mind could be changed—

“Sam? Did you hear all that?” Dana asked.

“Yeah. How does he know the vote is split?”

“Industry lobbyists. They conduct informal polls. Do you still believe he's not behind the letters?”

“I don't know. Maybe he is. Maybe he was just seeing how you're doing with the Monday deadline. Figured you'd be so scared you wouldn't come to work. At least we know he's in town and can look for him tonight, shut him down before he makes any public statements.”

“He'll be as out of place at the banquet as my attending a wrestling federation match, don't you think?”

“Harley's not self-aware enough to consider it,” he said in the understatement of the year. Sam pictured the look that must've been on Dana's face when Harley called her “little lady.” “I bet he slunk out of your office with his tail between his legs.”

“I don't think it's long enough.”

Sam laughed.

“Well, there were rumors in high school,” she added. “So, what are you up to?”

“Waiting for a chance to interview someone.”

“Who?”

“I'll tell you later. I might be completely off base. Call me if you need me.”

“Okay.”

“Dana? Thanks for last night.”

Her momentary silence gave him time to remember the details.

“My pleasure,” she said.

He heard the smile in her voice before he ended the call. She hadn't said she loved him this morning. When the sex ended, those three little words stopped, too. Wasn't that a guy thing?

Sam glanced in his rearview mirror as a car approached then turned into the driveway of the French Normandy-style
house where he was parked. The home had the same view as Dana's. In fact, it was only a couple blocks from Dana's, although it wasn't as magnificent nor as large. Still, the building had a grace that suited Lilith Perry Paul perfectly—conservative, traditional and elegant.

He climbed out of his car and walked up her driveway. She still sat in her car, had probably spotted him in her rearview mirror.

He came up to the driver's-side door. She keyed the power to roll down her window.