Read Pierce My Heart (Women of Willowbrook Book 1) Online
Authors: Kelsey Jensen
The look in his eyes has my head whipping back around to the photo then back to him, only to repeat the process again.
This time when I look at him, my eyes are wide and his face is knowing.
“Who are they, Jake?”
It's a simple question.
At least, I thought it was until a look of utter devastation cut through his features when he peers up at the photo.
My whole body locks.
My heart and stomach drop to the floor as my hand shoots out and curls around his thigh.
“
Baby
,” I whisper, all the pain I feel for him bleeding through that one word.
Like a flash the look is gone.
His head dips as he grabs my hand, his eyes following the path his thumb traces along the back of my palm. I do my best to ignore the shivers his touch causes and wait.
Wait for him to say something; to do something.
For some sort of explanation of the absolute pain I witnessed.
He finally lifts his head, bringing his and my hand up so he can lay a kiss against my palm before settling them both back on his thigh.
“I brought you here for two reasons. The first being Gail makes fucking great food and I wanted you two to meet—” he stops, his eyes lifting back up to the photo.
“And the second?” I push.
He looks back at me. “Because this is the only place I could ease you into my past instead of dropping it like a fucking bomb on you,” he explains in a rough voice, though I'm unsure of what he's explaining exactly.
My brows knit with confusion. “I don’t understand, baby. What do you mean?” I ask softly.
“What made you ask me who they were?” he asks, nodding his head to the photo but never taking his eyes off me.
I wasn’t about to tell him that the look in his eyes reminded me of the man's, so I went for the simplified version.
“You look alike.”
He nods again. “We would. They’re my parents.”
I nod to myself.
That makes sense.
He took after the man, but he had his mother’s eyes and her hair coloring. Thinking about it, I could see why Gail’s smile was familiar and where Grace got her beauty.
My voice, almost a whisper, as I voice the question I’m dreading. “Something happened, didn’t it? To them, I mean.”
I knew something had to have. There was no other reason for the look on his face when I asked about them.
His body tenses and my own tenses along with him, hand tightening around his. I need him to know no matter what he shares, I’m here.
I'm here and I'm not going anywhere.
He must read it on my face, or some semblance of it because his body relaxes a fraction and his hand gives mine an acknowledging squeeze.
“Yeah, sweetheart. They were headed home one night from a party when they were hit head on by a drunk driver. The driver wasn’t wearing his seatbelt and went through the windshield, Mom died on impact, and Dad a day later in the hospital. After he woke up and found out Mom didn’t make it. Happened ‘bout nine years ago this December. I’d already gone back to school and Grace was only fifteen. She was home alone when the cops came to the door. Luckily, they didn’t say shit till Gail could get over there and be with her. The only good thing about the whole fucking thing was Dad waking up for the short time he did and us being able to tell him we loved him one last time.”
Oh my God.
Oh my God.
Tears start to sting my eyes.
Turning in the booth so I'm able to reach his face, I keep one hand on his thigh as I bring the other up to grip the side of his neck, my thumb sweeping along the stubble of his jaw as I look into his eyes.
“Baby,” I choke out on a whisper.
He gives my hand a reassuring squeeze, like
he's
trying to comfort
me
. Like
I'm
the one who needs the support in the scenario.
“It’s been almost nine years, Anna. I’m okay, I promise.”
I give him a skeptical look.
It didn’t matter if it was nine or forty-nine years, you don’t just get over losing someone. Especially your parents.
It’d only been four years since we’d lost Nana Jean and it still gutted me a little every time I thought of her. I couldn’t even begin to imagine not having my Mom or Dad around.
Hell, just thinking about it made me want to rush home and grab them both in huge hugs and not let go.
“Babe,” Jake begins, pulling my attention back to him. “I didn’t tell you this shit to make you feel sorry for me. We’re seeing where this shit goes between us and to do that we need to get to know each other. My parents dying is something you needed to know. Sucks I gotta tell you any way I do, but I tried to make it easy,” he apologizes, insanely I might add.
Which I don't hide with the look I'm giving him.
“Jesus, Jake. This isn’t about me,” I whisper harshly, putting weight on both my hands to get closer and make him understand. “I appreciate you not dropping it on me like a bomb, I do, but it shouldn’t have been about making things easy for
me
. It should’ve been about how to make reliving the nightmare as easy as possible for
you
. I can’t even begin to imagine the pain that you, Grace, and Gail went through when you lost them. Just seeing the look on your face when I asked who they were was enough to give me a hint of it.”
His breathing, heavy and ragged when I move my hands from his neck and thigh to frame his face, keeping my watery gaze locked with his steely one, as I apologize. It’d likely do nothing, but it's the only thing (other than my support) that I can give him.
“I’m
so fucking sorry
you had to go through that, Jake. I wish I could take the pain away, change what happened, but I can’t and I’m so fucking sorry for that too.” I shake my head and peek at the photo before turning back and leaning my forehead against his, my lips an inch from his as I whisper, “You look just like him, but you have her eyes and hair. They were beautiful, and they gave all the beauty they had to you and Grace. I’m sorry they never got to fully see how beautiful you truly are, baby.”
When the last syllable leaves my lips, Jake’s crash into mine. His kiss hard, almost angry, but it's telling in so many ways. It isn't more than a couple seconds before he softens his mouth, gliding his tongue along the seam of my lips and erasing the initial harshness with the tender way he’s moving his mouth, before he pulls away.
It all happened so quick I hadn’t even realized he’d buried his hand in my hair until I felt the tension release the same time his fist did.
“Sorry, sweetheart,” he mutters as I watch his eyes swirl with so many different emotions.
I see the pain and anger.
I see the acceptance.
I see his possessiveness towards me, as well as the care and tenderness he shows me.
But, I also see the same look that prompted this whole conversation.
A look I want so desperately to be real, but one I'm not ready to bring up.
Not yet.
Gliding my thumb over his bottom lip, I give him a small smile as I shrug, letting him know it's okay.
In fact, it was so okay I wouldn’t mind it happening again.
The tenderness in his eyes bleeds out to his face as he looks at me, his fingers tucking a strand of hair behind my ear as he leans down to give me a soft kiss.
Just as the kiss starts getting good someone clears their throat and I spring back, face already reddening to see both Gail and Joanna standing at the end of our table.
Joanna smirking and Gail smiling, though she also looks like she's trying to fight back tears.
“Jesus, it takes two of you to deliver our order,” Jake grumbles, though I figure the grumbling is more because of the interruption of things getting good than the fact it was the two of them bringing our order.
“For your information, grumpy butt, I was bringing Anna her refill and you a fill up. And by the tone of your voice, I’d say I was right on time,” Joanna responds back, her tone all attitude.
“And I saw Jo had her hands full, so I thought I’d bring you guys your food. Make sure everything was the way you wanted it,” Gail supplies, her voice calm.
Then again, she’s been dealing with Jake all his life. I figure she knows how to handle him.
Most of the time.
Jake doesn't respond, so I decide to step in.
“Mmm, that smells awesome. Thank you, both of you, for bringing it over.”
“No problem, doll face. It’s my job,” Joanna says with a wink before setting my diet on the table and snatching up the other that had, no doubt, melted a bit down.
Then, almost as a second thought, she fills Jake’s coffee cup near to the brim and drops some packets of sugar on the table. Giving me a smile, she flounces away and over to a surly looking man who was trying to get her attention.
I turn my attention to Gail after Joanna’s exit to see her looking at Jake, a mixture of love, worry, and happiness all over her face. She must’ve felt my eyes because she swings her head in my direction.
“Well, like I said, I saw Jo’s hands full so I decided to deliver the food to you myself,” she repeats.
Jake coughs and we both turn to look at him.
When they interrupted us Jake and I went back to our previous position of side by side with his arm behind me, so I could only see the profile of his face as he took a sip of his coffee, but I could’ve sworn I saw the ghost of a smile there.
When I see her hands shoot to her hips, I figure Gail must’ve seen it too.
“And just what is so funny, mister?”
“Nothing, ‘cept the fact that’s horseshit.”
“It’s not horseshit. I help Jo out all the time when she’s busy,” she fires back.
“Yeah, you do. But I’ve also seen Jo carry three plates up her arm, a coffee pot in one hand, and a tray of drinks balanced on the other. No way would one drink and a coffee pot make her hands full.”
She looks put out—like she can't disagree but she
really
wants to.
“Okay, so it was horseshit. Things looked intense and we wanted to give you time, but Jo thought things were getting too intense so she headed over, and
I
didn’t want
her
to make a mess so I came over with the food. Then you two started macking on each other so it was all pointless. Happy?” she snips, her voice full of the same annoyance mine was whenever Jake called me on my bullshit.
Seems he had a knack for it inciting it in women in his life.
Go figure.
“Macking?” he asks chuckling, skipping over everything else.
My guess, on purpose. He already called her out and she explained. He wasn’t going to rub her nose in it, and I liked him that much more for it.
“You’re dating yourself there, Aunt Gail.”
She rolls her eyes and lets out a small laugh. “Yeah, yeah. ‘Cause forty is
so
old.”
Jesus, forty? The woman didn’t look a day over thirty-two.
“What moisturizer do you use?”
She blinks at me, obviously not expecting the question. “Um, I just use a night cream I picked up at Target. Olay, I think. Why?” she asks hesitantly, bringing a hand up to touch her cheek.
“Because I think I’m going to need to pick a vat of it up if I want to look how you do at forty,” I reply, a smile on my face.
She throws her head back and starts laughing, a wide smile lighting up her face when she looks back at us.
“You’re sweet, honey. If you want, I’ll get the name and give it to Jake.” When she looks over at him to see the blank stare on his face as he chews a bite, she turns back to me. “On second thought, I’ll let Grace know and she’ll get it to you.”
“I’d appreciate it.”
After a pause, the smile that had never left her face got wide again. “Well, I’ll leave you two to eat in peace. Holler if you need anything.”
A few bites into my freaking
delicious
waffle and perfectly runny egg with some of the best syrup I’ve ever had, I feel Jake’s heavy stare on me.
“What?” I ask through a mouthful, while trying not to show I have a mouthful.
He leans in and gives me a quick kiss before pulling back and smiling that sexy, smile. “Nothing, sweetheart. Nothing.”
I figure there's something, but my stomach keeps pulling my attention back to my food.
This meant I missed it when
that
look that had been lurking in the background while he watched me, moved over his entire face.
Had I known, I would’ve gladly given up every waffle and fried egg that came my way for the rest of my life because by the time I looked back at him, it was gone.
Hot Buns
After a seriously delicious and filling breakfast, Jake drops me off at home with a kiss and a promise to call me later.
As I wander to my front door a little dreamily, I feel the heat of his stare and decide to add a little extra sway to my hips until I make it inside.
Just after Juliet finishes her jump and lick greeting, I feel my phone vibrate in my back pocket.
Walking down the hallway to let Juliet out in the back to do her business, I slide my phone out and check the screen.
J: Cute.
I can’t help the smile that spreads across my face as I read his text.
Stepping out on the deck so I can keep an eye on Juliet, I tap my screen and try to decide how to respond.
A: I don’t know what you’re talking about.
Going for coy and a little flirty.
At least I hope he takes it that way.
Deciding not to dwell when he hasn’t responded in the thirty seconds I stare at my phone, I lift my head and look for Juliet, putting my phone away as I do so.
She was circling around the tree, her tail going crazy as she sniffed something.
I let out a whistle. “Come on, girl, let’s go inside,” I call to her.
Her head shoots up and she takes off like a rocket in my direction. Bracing myself just in time, her body sways a little and she rams right into my shins, almost knocking me down in the process. I reach down and give her head and body some scratches while I laugh.
“Let’s go, baby. I need to feed you,” I mumble, leading the way inside.
Not that it’s needed.
The second she heard the word food her body was vibrating all over.
Closing the door behind us, I follow her into the kitchen where she stops, tail wagging, in front of the pantry where I’d stashed her food. Managing to not trip over her, I get the food out and safely poured in her dish. Something that was proving to be quite a feat when she was under foot the entire time.
While she ate, I decide to throw a load of laundry in and work on some of the paperwork I’d brought home Friday, but not before I hear the chime of my phone again.
J: Just make sure the next time you’re moving your hips and ass that way, you’re doing it while headed for me.
When I read over his words, I feel a shiver run through my entire body.
A: Promise, baby
J: Good
I smile.
* * *
It was thirty minutes of work followed by two of the many Christmas movies playing in the month of November on Hallmark (in their attempts to gear you up for the season) when my phone started ringing.
Grumbling to myself since I have to mute it on the part when they finally give in to their feelings for each other, I pick up my phone, not bothering to look at my display while I greet them with a, “Yo.”
“Yo, yo, you, yo.”
My head jerks back in surprise before my face scrunches with confusion. “Gran?”
“Well who else would it be? The Easter Bunny?” she quips.
I laugh, I can’t help it.
Gran was usually the furthest thing from a crotchety old woman. Most of the time she was loving, fun, and loud as hell, but when that crotchety came out it was something to see. Gramps, or one of the boys, usually got the brunt of it.
Come to think of it, the only female who had been on the receiving end was Evan.
“Sorry, Gran. I didn’t look at the phone before I answered,” I reply.
“Pish posh, girl. I’m only fooling. Your mom wanted me to call and tell you dinner was moved to 7:00 tonight on account of all the extra people.”
Shit.
I’d forgotten
all
about dinner tonight.
“What extra people?” I ask, while I take a look at the clock and see I still have a couple hours before I had to leave.
“Well your gramps and myself, Mia, Evangeline, and that friend of your brothers, who I hear is now your
special
friend, and his sister,” she informs me.
Okay, there’s a lot there.
“Wait, why is Mia coming alone? Where’s Uncle Eric, Aunt Sarah, and Payton?”
I bring the phone down and put it on speaker, listening to Gran explain while I shoot Jake a text questioning why he never mentioned anything about dinner.
A: Why didn’t you tell me you and Grace were coming to dinner?
“Eric and Sarah took Payton on a college visit overnight. They won’t be back till Sunday evening so Mia’s been staying with us.”
Ah.
“Oh. She didn’t mention anything when we talked last week,” I mutter more to myself.
“It was a spur of the moment thing. They surprised her with a trip to visit when she got her acceptance letter. You know how bad she wants to be a Viking like her dad.”
I did know.
Payton had mentioned on more than one occasion how her dream was to go to Brafton University like her dad. She never explained to me or anyone (that I’m aware of) why she had her heart set there, but she did and had ever since she was little. I knew she must’ve been freaking out over the trip, that’s why it was so weird I hadn’t heard a word about it after she’d found out.
My phone buzzing in my hand interrupts my thoughts.
J: Didn’t know till about 10 minutes ago. Why, don’t want me to?
Yeah, right. The issue is I do.
I mean, that isn’t really an issue, but it is.
I don’t want him to think I’m trying to force him around me, or trying to constantly be around him.
I don’t want him to think I’m clingy.
I am, he just isn’t supposed to find out yet.
I decided to just lay it out like I’ve been doing with him.
A: No, I do. I just don’t want you to get tired of having me around.
“Anna, honey, you still there?” Gran asks.
Crap.
“Yeah, sorry. Multitasking. But that’s awesome they took her out there. I hope she loves it,” I add.
“I’m sure she will. Now, I need to go light a fire under Gramps’ butt so we get there early enough for me to help your mom, but don’t think I don’t want to hear all about this man. Unless you want those questions asked in front of him, you best get your rear in gear and get yourself there early as well,” she suggests.
Crimeny.
“Sure thing, Gran. I’ll see you all tonight.”
“Okay. Love you Anna.”
“Love you, too,” I reply through a smile.
As soon as I hit end on my phone, Jake’s response comes through. I feel my smile die as my stomach churns with nerves at what his response might be.
J: Trust me, Annie, no chance of that happening. Ever.
My stomach melts, my heart races, and a smile, so wide it hurts, split my lips.
A: Good :)
* * *
I had just pulled up with Juliet in tow when I heard the buzz of my phone in the cup holder. Throwing the car in park, I hit the button to check it.
M: Anna where r u? I wnt 2 hear bout this hawwt guy!!!
My eyes cross a little trying to read her message.
I shake my head and hit respond.
A: Chill Mia, I just pulled up. Be there in a sec.
My phone chimes with an immediate response, but I shouldn’t have expected much less from a sixteen-year-old girl. I’d fear for her—and everyone else’s—life if she ever lost it.
M: B rdy.
Great.
I huff out a breath, drop my phone in my purse before shouldering it and grab a hold of Juliet’s leash.
Looking towards the front door I see Mia—all 5’4 of her. The women in my family weren’t particularly tall (all ranging from 5’5-5’8) so Mia, being the youngest
and
shortest, always got the brunt of the jokes from the cousins. Which had turned her into a little spitfire.
Poor Uncle Eric had no clue how to handle the girl, and Aunt Sarah thought it was a hoot to watch him try.
I honestly thought Mia and Aunt Sarah had some sort of deal going on, but they’ve never copped to anything when I’ve asked.
“Yeesh, Anna. Took ya long enough.”
I roll my eyes at her exaggeration.
“Mia, I’m almost an hour early.”
Miraculously, I actually was, well, in my time. So really, I’m half an hour early.
“Yeah, but Gran’s
dying
to hear about your, and I quote, ‘Stud Muffin’,” she snickers.
Shaking my head, I give her a kiss on the cheek before walking past. I bend to unclip Juliet’s lead, but find Mia has already done it before squatting down to give my girl tons of loving.
“Aren’t you just the cutest thing? Yes you are, yes you are,” she coos.
Smiling, I stand up and head down the short hallway to say hello to everyone in the living room.
Dad’s eyes come to me when I round the corner, but Gramps’ stays focused on the TV while he grumbles at the game.
“Hey, baby girl.”
“Hey, Daddy. Hey, Gramps,” I call.
Gramps looks over and gives me a smile that has my stomach churning with nerves.
“Hope you’re ready, Anna Banana. The wolves are out tonight,” he warns before shouting, “Ree! Anna’s here.”
Even though my heart warmed from the name he’d been calling me since I was a little girl, I give him a good glare for outing me before I turn it on Dad when I hear his laughter.
“Anna! Get your booty in here, missy,” Gran hollers from the kitchen.
“Don’t worry. If it gets to be too much, just fake a heart attack. That’s what I do when she starts nagging at me,” Gramps offers.
Dad throws back his head and starts laughing harder.
I throw my head back too, but the only noise I make is a groan.
“
Anna!
”
I right my head, muttering to myself before responding. “I’m coming!”
“Remember what I said,” Gramps advises, nodding his head sagely like he just gave me the key to life.
For him it probably is.
I wander down the hallway towards the kitchen and hear Gran and Mom chatting.
“No, Ree, this boy’s a good one. Nothing like the last two. He’s Robby’s friend and if Robby didn’t trust him, he wouldn’t have let him within a hundred feet of Anna. You know how protective he is, especially since she came home,” Mom confides.
I go still.
This is the first I’ve heard about anyone realizing the change in Robby. I shouldn’t have expected any less, though.
Mom was like a bloodhound when it came to her kids.
“I sure hope so, Lucy. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen that girl happy. Anna’s the kind of girl who deserves that and so much more.”
My breath starts sticking and my heart starts hammering in my chest.
Before I can hear anymore, I tiptoe a few steps back before putting extra oomph in each step to make sure they hear me coming.
When I walk in, four pairs of eyes come to me—three human, one canine. Ignoring the feelings running through me, I head over to Gran to give her a hug before repeating the process with mom.
“Hey, Gran. Hey, Mom.”
“My girl,” Mom says with a smile.
“Hey yourself, honey. Let’s hear about your man friend.”
Mia gives me big eyes that clearly say ‘I told you so’ as I drop down onto the stool next to her.
Shrugging my shoulders, I feel a blush tinge my cheeks as I try to fight a smile.
Trying to be nonchalant, I ask her, “What do you want to know?”
Her calculating look vanishes. She nods her head knowingly and smiles. “Got all I needed from that look right there. Didn’t we Lucy?” Gran asks Mom while grinning at her like a loon.
Mom gives her a returning grin before looking at me and winking. “We sure did, Ree.”
What was with all the winking today?
I turn my head Mia’s way to see her looking at the both of them like they're crazy, but that isn't an unusual look for Mia (or anyone) to have while looking at Gran.
I decide a change of topic is definitely in order.