Pages of the Past (Bellingwood Book 9) (8 page)

~~~

Polly was in her office the next morning when she looked up to see Lydia walk in the front door. It was quite obvious that she'd been crying, so Polly jumped up and out of her chair and met her friend outside the office.

"Lydia, what's going on?"

"I shouldn't be here, but I need to talk to someone."

"Do you want to go upstairs?"

"Could we?" The poor woman looked like she could fall apart at any moment.

"Would you like coffee or tea or anything?" Polly asked when they entered her apartment.

"Coffee would be nice."

"You sit down. I'll be right out with it." Polly went into the kitchen and quickly texted Jeff that she was upstairs and didn't want to be bothered. She poured out two cups of coffee and went back into the living room, snagging an opened box of tissues with her little finger as she passed by a table.

Sitting in the chair next to where Lydia was seated, Polly handed her the coffee and dropped the tissues on the table in front of them. "What's up?"

"First of all, I'm so sorry about last night. I didn't have the energy to cook supper and thought that if we went out for dinner it might help him relax, but it just made things worse."

"You don't need to apologize for anything. We were worried about you two."

Lydia shook her head. "I don't know what to think. All of these years he has been the most stable man I've ever known and now things are falling apart and ..."

"He's still not talking about it?"

"Not a word. I've quit asking. It only makes it worse. He didn't even want to go over to Dayton to see the grandchildren on Sunday. He's never missed that. I couldn't tell Marilyn what was going on. She has enough stress with those three active little ones. But she knew something was wrong."

Polly reached out and took Lydia's hand.

"He slept in the guest room last night, Polly. Even when we're sick, he doesn't do that."

"This is the first time?"

Lydia nodded. "He didn't say anything, just put his pajamas on and left the room. I shut the door and cried all night long. He was up and out of the house before I went downstairs. I heard him taking a shower at five o'clock. And you know he's never up before seven."

"Maybe it has to do with a case."

"No. It's not that." Lydia shook her head. "I know it's not that." She thought for a moment. "Okay, I don't know for sure since he's not even talking about those anymore either."

"What do you want to do? Do you want to leave the house?"

'No!" Lydia declared. "That's our house and I'm not leaving it because some alien has taken over my husband's body."

"Okay, then what?"

Lydia deflated. "I don't know. I want to tell you that I'll fight for the marriage, but if he wants something else out of life, I guess I want him to be happy."

"Do you mean that?"

Lydia nodded, then she shook her head and then she nodded again. 'I don't know what I mean. I've never had to do this before. We have always been a team. No matter what came at us, whether it was external or internal to the family, we talked until we were on the same page and then presented a united front. All of a sudden, we've been separated for some reason and I don't know what to do next."

"I think the first thing you need to do is figure out what's going on."

"I don't even know where to start. I can't talk to anyone at his office."

"Why not?"

"Because I don't want to screw with his work life. If it isn't about work, they don't need to know that we're having trouble in our marriage. If it is about work, they don't need to know that he isn't coping well with it."

"Do you really believe they don't see this?"

A shrug was Lydia's only response.

"Does he have any family here?"

"Not here. His sister and a brother live in Georgia and another brother is in Birmingham, Alabama."

"He's from down south? How come he doesn't have an accent?"

Lydia smiled. "He'd lost that by the time we met. He always said that us northerners had too much trouble understanding what he was saying and he didn't need that when he was trying to arrest someone. His sisters and brother have thick accents."

"Have you talked to them about this?"

I doubt they'd know anything."

"No friends that he talks to?"

"Just me. And I guess not even that."

"What about Ken Wallers or the guy from the DCI - what was his name, Digger?"

"Darrell … yes, Digger. They're friends, but I've never known Aaron to confide in either of them. Honestly, Polly, that's what I've always been around for. He can't trust people because of confidentiality. He trusts me." She started to weep. "And now he doesn't even have me. I wish I knew how to break through whatever is going on."

"How can I help you?"

"This is enough. I just needed someone to talk to this morning."

Polly didn't dare ask why Lydia was talking to her and not Beryl or Andy. Who knows, maybe she already had and just needed someone else to listen.

"Has Beryl talked to you about getting together?" Polly asked.

"Uh huh. Are you free Thursday night?"

"Absolutely." Even if there was something else, Polly would change her plans for this. "Where are we going?"

"I told Beryl that I didn't want to do any silly artistic stuff if we went to her house, but she was going to talk to Sylvie since we haven't had a chance to christen the new place yet."

"That sounds like fun. You'll love it."

"It's a beautiful home. I was in there several times when the Glau's lived there."

Polly smiled. Of course she had. Lydia had probably been inside every house in Bellingwood. "Sylvie's been working on updating things in the house. The boys' bathroom didn't have a shower, just a cool claw foot tub. Eliseo and Jason changed that out."

"I'm glad she has him. Are they ever going to get together?"

Polly smiled. "I don't know. I wanted her to figure it out before she invested in a house, but I wasn't about to say anything. She was so excited to finally be able to make this happen for her boys."

"Today I'd tell her to hold on to all of the independence she can. When you rely on someone else for more than thirty years and find yourself all alone, it just..." Lydia glanced around the room as if to make sure no one heard. "It sucks."

"You aren't all alone, Lydia. Until you know what's going on with Aaron, you can't make those assumptions."

"I go back and forth between falling apart because he's pulled so far away from me to being absolutely furious and wanting to kick him to the curb. My heart really needs me to either make a decision about which path to take or at least find a happy medium. I don't know how much more of this I can take."

"This is killing me," Polly said. "I want to do something... fix something... even break his neck. I feel helpless." She gulped. "I'm sorry. I know it's not about my feeling helpless. I really can't imagine what you're going through."

"Maybe we should call in an emergency from Sylvie's on Thursday night and tie him up until he talks to us," Lydia said. "Who knows, maybe you guys would get more out of him than I can."

"Do you want me to talk to him?"

That gave Lydia pause, but she shook her head. "No. I don't want him thinking that I'm airing our dirty laundry all over town."

"So he's allowed to mope around like Eeyore, but you aren't allowed to ask for help? That's crap."

"I know. I just won't stop respecting his position."

"But..."

Lydia stopped Polly by lifting her hand. "No. I have to give him the benefit of the doubt."

"No you don't." Polly was furious. "He's been giving you absolutely nothing for over a month now, right? And yet he wants you to act as if nothing is different?"

"I know," Lydia said through an intake of breath. "It's not fair to me, but it's where I am right now. Let me have more time. If it doesn't get any better, I'll find another way to confront him."

"I hope it does get better, but it seems to keep getting worse, right? How far down are you going to let this go before you stop it?"

"Maybe we'll find bottom soon."

"Okay. You do what you have to do and trust me, I will always be here for you."

"But?"

"No buts. Just - I will be here. Even if I think you're making the wrong decision, I still support you. It's your life and your marriage."

"Thank you, sweetie." Lydia checked her watch. "Look at the time. I need to be at the nursing home in a few minutes." She stood up and ran her fingers through her hair, fluffing it up.

"I love you, Lydia. I wish I could do more."

"You've done enough. You gave me back some energy so I can face today. That's all I need. One day at a time."

Polly walked with her to the front door, then down the steps to the main door of Sycamore House. She stood and watched as Lydia crossed the parking lot to her Jeep, got in and drove away. Aaron Merritt's easy life was forfeit now. The first time he crossed Polly's path and was alone, she was ready to take him to the ground and pummel him until he told her what was going on. How could he do this to his wife?

She chuckled. Pummeling Aaron wouldn't be an easy task, but he'd best hope he didn't have a reason to be at Sycamore House. Avoiding Polly might be the best decision he could make right now.

CHAPTER EIGHT

As Polly tried to sneak her legs out from under the animals, Henry's breathing changed. She went still, hoping he'd drift back to sleep.

"What time is it?" he asked, his voice raspy from sleep.

"It's five thirty. Don't get up. I just feel like going down to the barn. It's been a couple of weeks and I need some horse hair and hay on my clothes."

"Okay." He rolled to his other side and tucked the blankets under his chin.

She slipped into her jeans and a flannel shirt, pulled a sweatshirt over that and picked up her boots. "Come on, Obiwan. You're with me." She'd tried taking Han down to the barn a few times, but neither he nor the horses were any too happy with that. Obiwan stood beside her as she opened the door and darted into the living room.

Polly went down the front steps with him and took a breath. It was quiet this early in the morning. Once they got outside, she took a deep breath in the crisp air and swiped her phone's flashlight on to make sure there was nothing on the path. Obiwan raced to the fence and waited for her to catch up.

Lights were already on inside the barn and she wondered what it would take for her to beat Eliseo down here in the mornings. It used to be enough to arrive at six thirty.

She pushed the door open and Obiwan followed her inside. "Hello?" she called out.

"Good morning!" Eliseo's voice called out from somewhere in the back.

Tom and Huck must have been with him, because both donkeys came out to greet her. "Hello you gorgeous young men. How are you this morning?" Tom nosed at her pocket, hoping for a treat. "Oh no you don't, you beggar. Stay out of my pocket."

Eliseo came out of the donkey's stall. "What are you doing down here so early?"

"I missed my animals and since things move so fast in the mornings, the only time I have is before everyone gets up."

He nodded. "I get that. I have two at home that love mornings."

"I'm here to work. Can I just start in Daisy's stall?"

The horse heard her name and snorted. Polly stepped up and rubbed her head. "Yes, pretty girl, I'm talking about you. Are you ready for me?" 

Polly walked over to Demi's stall. She could usually find Hansel and Gretel sleeping with him. He was the most patient of all the horses and let them sleep on top of him, around him, anywhere they wanted. Sure enough, the two cats were snuggled in. He didn't move anything except his head when he saw Polly.

"You are amazing," she said. "Do those cats really deserve your good will?"

Eliseo came down the center alley with the wheelbarrow and rakes. "Do you really want to do this?"

"Hey," she said, laughing. "It hasn't been that long."

"It's been a while and you certainly don't
need
to help this morning. Jason will be here at six."

"When do I start paying him for the work he does?"

Eliseo handed her a rake and opened Daisy's stall. "Not any time soon. We can talk about it this summer, but for now, he's just fine."

"Are you paying him?" Polly asked, lifting muck out of the stall.

"His mom and I worked out an allowance so he has spending money. He works on the farm and helps in the barn. He's fine."

"Has he said anything about saving for a truck or a car?"

"He isn't even fifteen years old yet. He can't drive for another year. There's plenty of time."

"Okay, I won't push anymore. But..."

"We've got this, Polly. Don't worry."

She went back to work, muttering to herself. Daisy goosed her in the back and Polly spun and said to the horse, "What? Do you want to tell me what to do, too?"

The horse pushed at her again. "What?" Polly asked.

Eliseo walked in with a bucket of grain. "She wants her breakfast. You're doing things out of order."

Polly laughed at him. "You're right. I forgot. I guess it has been too long since I've spent any time down here.

He patted Daisy's neck. "That's okay. We'll forgive you. Do you want to stir Demi and the cats?"

"Those three are awfully lazy in the mornings."

"You have no idea. He lets them do anything they want. I caught Hansel crawling up his neck the other day to use his head as a launching point for the beam up there. None of the other horses would tolerate that behavior, but Demi just puts up with it."

"He's my boy," Polly said. She opened his stall door and the cats leaped up from their nest and scattered. Tom had been waiting for the door to open and stood in the doorway as Demi came to his feet. Once the horse was up, Tom brushed past Demi's legs. He stood, waiting in front of the grain trough.

"What are you doing?" Polly asked.

"Demi is so easy going that the donkeys think they can eat his food."

She grinned and put her hand on top of Tom's head. "That's not fair."

"Nope. We don't let them get away with it, but they don't stop trying." Eliseo snapped a lead rope on Tom's halter and gave it a tug. When the donkey refused to move, Eliseo grinned. "It's usually a contest.

"Who wins?"

"Who do you think?"

"My money is on the donkey, but you're no slouch."

"No donkey will ever get the best of me, no matter how hard they try. However, it usually takes bribery."

"I'm here." Jason's voice rang throughout the barn. Tom lifted his head and started out of the stall to see who was speaking.

"Or a distraction," Eliseo said. He followed the donkey out and handed the lead to Jason. "Deal with him until Demi eats."

"Got it," Jason said. "What are you doing down here this morning, Polly?"

"Just spending time with my equine friends," she said. "I need to do this more often so it isn't such a surprise."

Eliseo came back with another bucket of grain and poured it into Demi's trough. The horse nudged Gretel out of the way after she jumped in to see if anything interesting showed up.

"I'll take care of the cats, too," Jason said. "Come on, Hansel and Gretel. You know where your breakfast is." He clicked his teeth and the two cats ran ahead of him to the feed room.

"It's a regular party down here in the mornings, isn't it," Polly said to Eliseo.

"We like watching them wake up. They each have their routines."

"And I've messed with them this morning. Sorry about that."

"It's no big deal and they all love you."

"Tell me what to do and I'll do it. Don't let me get away with opening doors and getting in your way, okay?"

"Stop it. You're fine. Here. Start mucking Demi's stall. Jason and I will take care of Nan and Nat. Then we're almost done."

Polly went to work and was headed back up to the house before the sun had started to rise. Obiwan followed and when she got upstairs, Henry was in the kitchen.

"I'm going to take a quick shower. Would you feed Obiwan?" she asked.

"Food is already down and coffee is brewing. What do you want for breakfast?"

"I can do that. This will only take a minute."

He looked at the counter, then back at her. "I could start something."

"You wanna start something in here?" she asked, winking at him and nodding toward the bedroom.

"Of course, but you have a couple of girls who are going to be waking up in a few minutes."

"Well, that's no fun." Polly stopped in the door to their bedroom. "I was going to make French toast. You made coffee... that will help.

~~~

Polly was in her office later that morning when Rachel came storming in. The girl started to slam the door, but thought better of it and turned to Polly, "Can I close this?"

"Sure. What's up?"

Rachel plopped down into a chair and flipped her hair. It was jet black with hot pink tips today. "I'm going to break up with him. He's an idiot."

"Billy?"

"Yes. Him and that freakishly idiotic friend of his. They're joined at the hip and he can't make a stupid decision without talking to Doug."

"What decision do you want him to make?"

"We're all in our early twenties."

"You're twenty."

"Close enough. Anyway, I don't see why they think it's a bad idea for me to move in."

Polly sat back, a little surprised. "Move in? Above the garage?"

"Sure. I don't take up much room. I'm there all the time anyway."

"What was his reason?"             

"He said it wouldn't be fair to Doug and they didn't have room."

Polly pursed her lips, trying hard not to allow a laugh to escape. "Have you talked to your mom?"

"No, not yet. But she'll be fine with it."

"Really? You're twenty."

"She was twenty when she had me."

"Uh huh, and you're exactly the same person as she was back then?"

"What do you mean by that?"

"I mean, you've made all of the same exact decisions that she made through your childhood and teenage years?"

Rachel didn't understand yet. "No. But what does that matter?"

"Because you two aren't the same twenty-year-olds.  You're two very different people and you should be talking to her about these big decisions."

"But that doesn't let Billy off the hook." She huffed and slammed her arms across each other on her chest. "Maybe I should just break up with him."

"Do you want to break up with him?"

"No, but I'd like to separate him from the idiot who lives with him sometimes."

"I get that, but those two have been friends for a long time."

"Maybe they should just get married then."

Polly put her hands down on her desk and leaned forward. "Okay. When did this whole moving in conversation happen?"

"Last night and this morning."

"You spent the night with him."

"Sure. I do all the time."

"And he told you that he wasn't ready for you to move in."

"Pretty much."

"Did he tell you that he didn't love you?"

"No."

"Did he say anything about breaking up?"

"No." Rachel started unclenching her fists, coming to grips with reality. "I pushed too hard, didn't I?"

"Maybe a little. These two guys have just figured out what it means to live on their own away from their moms. They're having a ball and by the way, they're including you in the fun."

"It's not so much fun anymore," Rachel said. "They quit playing video games with their buddies."

"Why did they do that?" Polly asked. "They had fun."

"I think it's my fault." Rachel's voice got quieter. "I told Billy he was like a kid with all the 'dudes' and the games."

"But you played those games with them."

"I know. I miss it too. But now that I'm working all the time I need more sleep. I can't do those all nighters like we used to do and I work on Friday and Saturday nights. Those are the best nights to game because no one has to work the next day or go to school."

Polly smiled. "So how mad at Doug are you really?"

"I don't know. He really doesn't want to grow up and I think he's holding Billy back."

"From doing what?"

"Going out on his own."

"But it was those two who went out on their own together and that was only last year."

"But Billy has grown up so much."

"Oh Rachel, I'm going to ask you a crazy, crazy question."

"What?" Rachel set her jaw.

"What made you fall for Billy in the first place?"

"I dunno. He was funny and did crazy things. He always made me laugh. He wasn't afraid of anything. If people laughed at him because he was a geek, he just blew it off." She dropped her head.

"All of the things that you've been training out of him this last year? All of the things that Doug is still doing?"

"But I love Billy more now that he's acting like an adult."