Only We Know (24 page)

‘Here's the thing.' Sam ran a hand over his hair. ‘I don't want you to get on it.'

Huh? ‘I've made up my mind, Sam, really.'

‘Hear me out. I don't think you should leave the island with so much unfinished business between you and your brother.'

Calla realised the tone in his voice wasn't arrogant or lecturing. It was something else entirely, something she couldn't pick. ‘Sam, you—'

He held up a hand. ‘I know, I know. Call it the arrogant arsehole in me. But I'm right on this one. You should face Jem, face whatever happened between you, and try to sort it out. There's something about you, Calla, I don't know what it is … I saw it with Charlie.' He sighed and laughed like he couldn't believe what he was thinking. ‘You have a way of wrapping blokes around your little finger.'

She did? His words were a shock. She'd never had any such power over anybody. ‘I wish I did. Maybe then I wouldn't be here trying to clean up my life.'

Sam bridged the distance between them and sat next to her on the sofa. He leant forward, his elbows on his knees.

‘I realised something last night. I've never asked you what happened with Jem. What happened in your family? I want to know, Calla. I want to understand why you don't want to face him. Surely nothing is so bad that you can't talk to him.'

Calla stared at her hands; her fingers twisted together in a knot. His unflinching gaze and the common sense in his words were about to make her cry. Where should she start? How could he possibly understand?

She took a deep breath. ‘For two years I've almost killed myself worrying about my little brother. For half of that time I thought he was dead. Every time a body was found somewhere, every time there was a car accident and it came on the news, I would get a panic attack. Every time I wondered if it was Jem.'

Sam reached for her hand. ‘That must have been a nightmare for you, not knowing.'

‘I felt like I was stuck in some kind of limbo. I couldn't move on with my life. My parents were dead and then Jem disappeared. It felt like I'd lost most of my family. Thank god for Rose.'

‘You're close to your sister.'

‘I am. There's only the two of us left. Or that's what we thought until a couple of weeks ago.'

‘You haven't lost him. All we have to do is make a phone call and you'll know for sure. When they're gone, you lose that chance forever, Calla.' Sam pulled his phone from the pocket of his jeans. ‘I have Jessie's number. I can call her right now and you can talk to him.'

Calla whipped the phone out of his hand. ‘Don't.'

‘Why not?'

‘Because I …'

‘Tell me. Why are you scared to see him, Calla?'

‘You really want to know the truth?'

‘Of course I do.'

Calla steeled herself. ‘The last time I saw Jem, it was horrible. It was the day Dad died and we were all upset and yelling at each other. I was hurt. That's why I know about having a concussion. I've had one before.'

Sam gripped her fingers so tight she thought he might squeeze the life out of them. ‘Fuck. Is he an addict? A drinker? Is that why he hurt you? Is that why he's been here hiding out? What the hell has my cousin let herself in for? And the baby?'

‘No, nothing like that. I tripped and fell. Got knocked out for a minute. He was horrified and he ran. He was always the gentlest boy, really. And maybe … maybe that's why he was so devastated by what happened.'

Sam put an arm around her shoulders and Calla moved into him. She didn't second-guess why. She slipped her arms around him and pulled herself into his warmth, into the safety of his embrace.

‘He said he hated me.'

‘I'm sure he didn't mean it, Calla.'

‘If I go, will you come with me?' she whispered. She looked up at Sam and waited for a response.

‘I'll be there. And you'll be safe with me,' he murmured into her hair. ‘I promise you that.'

CHAPTER

30

Sam slowed his vehicle and turned left off the main road, past a sign that warned
No Through Road
. The smooth ride of bitumen ended and they were on a dirt track, the rough red dirt recently smoothed by graders but pockmarked by potholes of water anyway. Ahead, there was track as far as the eye could see. Above her, a cloudless blue sky and, on each side, impenetrable bush. Scrubby gums, grasses, yaccas with their flowering spikes reaching to the sky, shards of bark and shadows if you looked deeper. It was not a place to get lost, Calla decided.

Unless you really wanted to hide, which Jem clearly did. And now he was a few minutes away. Two years and a few minutes would be all it would take. He was a father now. He had a partner. He had a new life. There were so many questions to ask him that she wasn't sure where to start.

She felt Sam's hand on her thigh and she covered it with her own.

‘You've been quiet,' he said, glancing her way.

She was so glad to have him by her side, this kind man. He was a comfort to her, his strength supporting her, his reassurance just what she needed as the nervous energy began to take hold, twist her stomach and shatter her confidence, to make her doubt what she was doing and that she would be able to handle it.

Calla tried to find a smile to give him. ‘I'm a bit nervous, that's all.'

Sam drove around a gum-tree branch that had fallen on to the track. Calla liked the swerve of the vehicle as it rounded and straightened. Liked the way Sam was in charge. A little part of her knew she would be protected as long as she was with him.

‘I'm here.' His soft eyes held hers for a second and he lifted his hand to stroke her cheek.

‘You most definitely are,' Calla said with a sigh. She entwined her fingers with his and lifted her hand to press his fingers against her cheek.

He was with her in every way that counted. Sam had lived without a brother and she sensed his deep understanding of what the past two years had been like for her. How could she compare Jem with Andy? Andy was dead. The Hunter family had been torn apart by that loss and Sam's sadness was still so vivid after all these years.

‘Is it far?' Calla peered out the windscreen.

‘We're almost there. So. How do you want to handle this?'

She shook her head. ‘I have absolutely no fucking idea.'

There was a curve in the road ahead and they turned right before rounding a curve back to the left. There it was: Hidden Bay. For a place with such a romantic name, there wasn't much of anything to it. The road branched out into an open space about the size of two tennis courts, sand and red dirt mixing into hues of orange. Beyond it were two buildings, their roofs just visible above the scrubby coastal bushes. There was a white four-wheel drive parked in between the two shacks, a roof rack with a fishing rod strapped to it, all covered in red dust. And past all of that was the beautiful water, grey-green today but undoubtedly turquoise in the sun. Calla guessed that if you were going to live so far away from civilisation you might as well do it in a place like this.

Sam pulled up and turned off the growling engine. He undid his seatbelt and turned to face Calla. She unclipped hers and held a hand to her fluttering stomach. They sat in silence.

‘Just a warning. This may not go very well,' she said. ‘He might not want to see me, which means we could be back at Penneshaw in time for lunch.'

‘Where I come from, it takes two to fight. And it's usually two stubborn-as-hell people who can't see the wood for the trees. Who can't see what they mean to each other.' Sam's eyes were dead ahead, looking out to the water, but she saw his jaw clench.

‘Families …' Calla said. ‘Families can hurt each other in ways that people on the outside can never see or understand.'

Sam gripped the steering wheel, dipped his head. ‘I understand that better than you think.'

Calla took a deep breath. ‘Let's get this over with.'

They stepped out of the car and walked across the sand to a well-worn pathway between the two shacks. In front of them, the pulsing Southern Ocean was just a stone's throw away. Calla had to stop to take in its rugged magnificence. The wild sea disappeared into forever all around them, and to their left the jagged coastline protruded into the smashing waves like the bows of a hundred ships. The icy wind blew right through her but she was already shivering with tension. To her right, signs of life. There was a wooden deck built out front of the yellow shack; it was bigger than the house itself. Two wooden chairs sat facing each other like two old men having a conversation, and next to them was a large white up-ended bucket. There were three steps up to the deck and then perhaps a dozen to the front door, which was firmly closed against the wind. A screen door was jammed open with a white, rounded stone. Calla counted the steps. When she looked back Sam was right there, and he rested a reassuring hand on her shoulder.

Fifteen steps. Calla took the fifteen steps and that's when she heard the music coming from inside. Something poppy and happy. Maybe that was a sign. She lifted her hand and knocked. Sam was by her side and she so wanted to hold his hand, to twist her fingers into a knot with his.

The silver handle was thick with rust. Calla watched as it jiggled and then twisted.

And then the door opened.

CHAPTER

31

‘Sam?' Two beaming eyes stared right past Calla. ‘Bloody hell!'

‘Hey, Jessie!'

A short brunette threw open her arms and wrapped them around Sam's waist, holding on fiercely. Sam looked at Calla with a resigned smile.

‘Wow.' Jessie pulled back and took him in, from his dark hair to his boots. ‘This is a bolt out of the blue. How the hell are you? Have you come all this way to see the baby? That's so nice, you big softy. And who's this?'

‘Can we get to that once we get inside? We're freezing our arses off out here.'

‘Yeah, yeah, come in, come in.' Jessie pushed the heavy door open and Sam followed her. Calla hesitated. She listened for the sound of Jem's voice but could only hear the radio. Sam turned back to her, held out his hand. She took it and pulled the door closed behind her against the wind.

Calla was taken aback by how different the inside of the place looked from its worn and weather-pounded exterior. It was light and white. Two doors led off the small, open-plan kitchen and living area, which was filled with beautiful old wooden furniture, honeyed in tone and strategically placed. In the middle of the room, there was a large wooden table with four bentwood chairs gathered around it. In the corner of the room, there was an old-fashioned pram with a fine white blanket draped over the front of it like a curtain. And on the walls, picture after picture. All original drawings. Landscapes. Still lives with shells, old bottles. Each of them was detailed, intricate. Stunning. They took Calla's breath away.

‘Jessie, this is Calla.'

‘Nice to meet you, Calla.' Jessie shook her hand warmly. ‘And she's your …?'

‘Friend,' Calla said before Sam could get a word in.

Jessie raised her eyebrows and grinned. ‘Right. Well, welcome. It's not much but it's ours. Ella's asleep so you can have a cuddle when she wakes up. You want a cuppa?' Jessie looked from Sam to Calla.

‘I'd love a coffee,' Sam said.

‘Yes, thanks,' Calla said. ‘And congratulations on the baby.'

‘Thanks,' Jessie said with a beaming smile.

Calla's mind was a whir. Jessie hadn't reacted at all to her unusual name. Had Jem kept her a secret? Calla realised she might have to start her explanations much further back than she'd anticipated.

Sam and Calla pulled out chairs and sat at the table while Jessie boiled the kettle and set three mugs on the sink. ‘So. I can't believe you've come all this way. Without a bloody phone call or a message!'

Sam and Calla exchanged glances.

‘You want to start?' Sam asked quietly.

Calla cleared her throat. ‘Sam's helping me out with something. I'm from Adelaide and I'm over here on the island to find someone.'

‘Ooh, sounds like a mystery. Who are you looking for and what have they done?'

‘I'm here to find Jem.'

‘Who?' Jessie wore a confused smile.

‘Jem. Jeremy. We always called him Jem. I'm his sister.'

Jessie reacted in slow motion. ‘What?' Her smile flat lined. She leant against the sink, crossed her arms and shook her head. ‘There must be some kind of mistake. Jeremy doesn't have a sister. Or,' she added, ‘at least he's never mentioned one.'

‘He has two sisters, actually. Me and Rose. He's our little brother.'

‘But … you don't even look the same.' Jessie's eyes flew to Calla's hair.

‘I know. But he's definitely my little brother. He has a scar on his forehead just under his hairline from where the next-door neighbour's kid hit him with a stick when he was six.'

Jessie pulled herself back against the sink. ‘Sam? What do you know about this? What's going on?'

‘I met Calla here on the island. When Ben told us about you and Jem, I offered to bring her here.'

‘Jeremy's at work. I've got to call him. Tell him you're here. Find out why the hell I don't know he has a family.'

‘I'm sorry to turn up like this, I really am,' Calla said. ‘It's all been a bit sudden. I've been looking for Jem for two years, and a couple of weeks ago the police told me he was here on the island.' Calla paused. ‘They told me he'd been charged with dangerous driving. That's how I tracked him down.'

Jessie's expression was like thunder. ‘I was in labour and he was taking me in to Kingscote Hospital. Some ridiculous fill-in cop from the mainland pulled us over. I almost had Ella on the side of the bloody road.'

‘Hell,' Sam said.

‘Why don't you make the coffees, Sam, and I'll ring Jeremy.'