Once Upon an Accident 01 - The Accidental Countess (6 page)

“Isn’t it exciting?” Anna said. Her bubbly voice made Colleen twitch.

He smothered a laugh. The woman was going to give him hell as soon as they were alone. He looked forward to the battle. Sparring with Colleen was more exciting than any seduction he’d encountered. If she raised her voice to him, he might just have to kiss her. That thought sent warmth speeding through him, heating his blood. He shifted his weight, trying to relieve some of the tension his musings brought.

“Exciting?” Colleen asked, her voice rising an octave.

“Oh, yes.” Anna was oblivious to her sister-in-law’s distress. “Here I thought we would have to put up with all those insipid girls trying to catch themselves an earl, but now we have you. And you are ever so pleasant. Isn’t she, Sebastian?”

He thought of that wedding kiss, the feel of her lips against his, the way she had tasted… “Why, yes, she is.” His voice had taken on a husky edge as his gaze slipped to her lips.

“Really, Sebastian,” his mother admonished.

Her voice brought him out of all thoughts of kissing, tasting. When he looked at her, he could tell from the expression on her face she knew what he was thinking. His face flushed in embarrassment.

“Now, we will have to leave as soon as possible. You are going to be presented to society, and I’m sure we’ll have a lot of shopping to do.”

Colleen said not a word as she listened to his mother. If he didn’t know better, he’d have thought she was not a bit upset. Then he saw she was clenching her teacup so tightly, it was a wonder it didn’t shatter.

“Listen, Mother, Colleen and I need to talk about this. Why don’t you and Anna go back to the inn, rest and then we’ll have dinner?”

His mother looked from him to Colleen and then back again to him. A shrewd expression entered her eyes.

“Yes. That sounds like a marvelous idea.”

*

As the carriage pulled away, Victoria Ware settled against the seat.

Anna’s bubbly voice broke the silence. “I had no idea he would ever marry again.”

Victoria looked at her daughter, nineteen and so full of dreams and warmth. “He vowed not to. But…I think he got more than he bargained for with this one.”

“What do you mean, Mother?”

She grimaced, thinking of the way that tramp of a first wife had hurt her son. She’d not wanted him to marry so young, but he said he was in love so she had agreed. It had proved to be the wrong decision. Not six months later, she had started cheating on Sebastian and was dead a year after that from a jealous lover’s bullet.

“Yes, well, they married under unusual circumstances.” Victoria stopped Anna when she opened her mouth to ask questions. “You do not need to know anything about it. It is private and between them.”

Anna pouted for a minute and then smiled. “Well, the way he looks at her…” She sighed.

Oh, yes. She’d seen the way her son studied his wife. Sebastian was no choirboy. She knew he’d had many women. But when he looked at Colleen, it reminded her of her own dear Edward.

She thought about her plain daughter-in-law. There was something so familiar about those eyes. That shade of grey danced at the edge of a memory. She shook her head, knowing her mind was still not working properly. The last few weeks had been trying, worrisome and downright horrible. With the stress the family had already endured, tension had ridden high when Sebastian did not return on time.

One thing was for certain. She would do everything in her power to make sure there was no annulment. As she closed her eyes, she remembered the look on her son’s face while he watched Colleen, and the daggers her daughter-in-law had shot at him with her gaze.

She smiled. Oh, yes indeed. Those two would give her wonderful grandchildren.

*

Colleen sat on her bed, anger boiling her blood. She could not believe what a mess they had made of things. What were they going to do now? She had to find some way to break out of this ridiculous muddle. She didn’t want a husband. Now she was stuck with one
and
a bloody title.

Sebastian entered the bedroom and shut the door behind him. He leaned against it, crossing his arms. He didn’t say anything for a few moments, but he studied her, his gaze moving from her head down to her toes and back up again.

“Well, let’s hear it.”

“Let’s hear it?” She couldn’t believe he was being so casual. “Let’s hear it?”

“I know you are dying to yell at me, so let it go.” He gestured with his hands casually, as if he were asking for the price of a cravat.

“Yell at you?” Her voice was a hoarse whisper as she tried to contain her anger.

“Really, Colleen, you are beginning to sound like a simpleton. You keep repeating everything I’m saying. You did the same thing with my mother and sister. It’s a wonder they don’t think you have some kind of mental deficiency.”

The gall of the man! He was accusing her of acting like an idiot. And there he stood, behaving as though there was nothing wrong. For the first time in her adult life, rage took over.

Glancing around, trying to calm her heart—which was beating so fast she was amazed she didn’t expire on the spot—she noticed her favorite brush lying on her bed. She grabbed it and flung it at him with all her might. He ducked, and the brush banged against the door before falling to the floor.

“What the bloody hell are you doing?”

“I’m acting like a simpleton!”

He smiled. It warmed his eyes and softened his features. A whisper of misgiving brushed over her skin. The man was deadly when he turned on the charm. “I was only joking with you. Trying to ease the tension.”

“Sebastian! You said we would not get caught. Now we are trapped and not only that, your mother and sister think I am going to London with you.”

He looked away from her and walked to the window. “Would it be that bad, Colleen? You’ve never been there. You could see all the sights.”

“And then what? Wait until the annulment is fulfilled?”

He didn’t say anything. The clock ticked, the only sound in the room. The silence lingered and the tension tightened. Her suspicions rose and almost choked her.

“We
are
getting an annulment.”

“Colleen, that might be a problem.”

She didn’t say anything. She couldn’t. Her mind now whirled with the implications of what that simple statement meant.

He turned, an apologetic smile on his face. “I’m an earl, Colleen. It makes for a sticky situation.”

Sebastian tried to keep his thoughts on their conversation but it was proving difficult. Colleen’s face flushed with anger again. God, she was a sight to be seen when she was annoyed. A few strands had escaped her pulled-back hair and curled under her chin. His fingers itched to tuck them behind her ear. Or, thread his fingers through the heavy mass, causing it to fall.

With each angry breath, her chest rose and fell, drawing his attention to her breasts. The bodice of her dress left little to be desired, but in her anger, the soft, worn fabric hugged against her breasts, clinging to the curves with each inhalation.

Momentarily, he thought of stripping away the fabric, revealing just what she looked like naked. Ideas of gliding his hands over her skin tumbled through his mind. He could just imagine teasing, arousing, drawing her passion from her as he delighted in taking his own pleasure. Suddenly, painfully, he needed to know what her breasts looked like.

Were they pale with rose-tipped nipples that would tighten the moment he brushed his fingers over them?

“A sticky situation?”

Her voice brought him back to the present, although he had to shift again, to try to ease the heaviness of his groin.

“Yes. An annulment will be hard to obtain.”

“What does that mean?”

“It means that we may have to stay married.”

Slowly she rose and walked to him, her hands on her hips. “You said there would be no problem. No one would know we were married.”

She was close enough for her sweet scent to reach him, surround him. Jesus, it made him want to nibble her neck and work his way down to more interesting parts.

“Well, there is a slight problem with that. My mother knows.”

“You said you told her the truth.”

She had the most magnificent pair of lips. They were plump, the bottom one a little fuller than the top. Her untutored kisses almost made him lose control. With a little practice and some help from him, she would be exquisite. Thoughts of teaching her, kiss by kiss, sent another rush of heated blood through his veins.

“Sebastian! Are you paying attention to me?”

“Yes. I am.” He cleared his throat and pulled his mind from teaching his wife to kiss. “Mother would never lie about me being married.”

There had come a point in his discussion with his mother that he had realized they would have to stay married. He was obligated to produce an heir. She had risked her reputation to save his life. While physically she wasn’t his usual type of woman, she had a quick wit and sinful lips.

And she smelled of hot rolls.

“What are you saying?” Her voice was just above a whisper. He smiled, trying to reassure her.

“I’m saying that maybe we should reconsider our arrangement.”

All color drained from Colleen’s face. Sebastian grabbed her arm to be sure she didn’t pass out. From the look on her face, one would think being married to him was a fate worse than death. Not that he thought himself to be the catch of the season, but it was damned irritating that the thought of marriage almost sent his wife into a dead faint.

“Reconsider our arrangement?” she asked hoarsely. “What makes you think…?” She jerked her arm out of his hand. “What makes you think I want to continue this
arrangement
?”

“Good Lord, woman, sit down before you faint.”

The reprimand was enough to bring her back to life. Her face flushed, and her nostrils flared. That handle tightened in her back. Thank God she had her pride and tenacity. He could never deal with fainthearted women.

“I do not have fainting spells. I’m sure the women you acquaint yourself with—”

“What an interesting term, ‘acquaint’. I’ve never thought about it that way.”

Her eyes rounded, and she sputtered. Actually sputtered! Deciding he had the upper hand, he changed the subject.

“We are in a bit of a predicament, you and I.”

“You signed a contract. You said you would send a telegram of your death.”

He shook his head. “Colleen, that would never hold up, and what are you going to do? Take me to the justices? Let the whole world know that we struck a bargain?”

“Everyone in this town knows I despise titled men.”

“We live in a society that would never side with you in court.”

Her shoulders slumped and her lip quivered. “You said you would stick to the bargain and leave me alone.” Her voice was flat, emotionless. He did not like it at all. He liked her breathing fire and spitting insults.

“That was before Mother showed up. She’d throw a fit if I denied her wishes. It isn’t as if I’m thrilled about this arrangement either, Colleen. I never planned on marrying again.”

She walked around the bed and paced in front of her door. The dress she wore was a horrible shade of brown, buttoned up to her throat. It sagged in the bodice and the design made her look like a giraffe. Still, he couldn’t help watching the sway of her hips as she marched back and forth.

“There has to be a way out of this!”

“There is, but it would ruin your reputation.” He leaned against the windowsill, crossing his arms. “I know that it isn’t fair, but I’d not be touched by the scandal. Oh, I’m sure there would be a few invitations I would miss, but well, I’m an earl.”

Even as the words left his mouth, he couldn’t fathom his new position. He’d never thought to be an earl, happy to be the only son of a second son. All the money, none of the work. Taking the reigns of the estate would not be difficult, but to be the result of such a tragedy left a hollow pit in his stomach.

“If anything, it would make me all the more interesting, especially to women.”

That comment brought her pacing to a stop. She turned on him, slowly stomping in his direction. “You mean to say…” She took a deep breath as if trying to calm her nerves. “You would use my downfall as a way to acquire more women?” Her voice cracked on the last word.

“Ah, you care. I can’t tell you what that means to me.”

Her eyes narrowed and then turned steel grey. She continued closer and stopped within inches of him. Once again, the scent of hot sticky buns surrounded him and he found himself fighting not to lick his lips.

“If we are going to make this marriage permanent, which seems to be the case, I think you need to become more accommodating,” he said.

There! Acting like she was above being married to him. He was so busy being pleased with himself, he never saw the punch coming.

Colleen screamed in pain when her fist connected with his nose. The crunch of bone filled the room, and she wasn’t sure if it was her hand or his nose. He cursed, his hands flying to his face.

Tears gathered in her eyes as pain radiated from her knuckles up her arm. Her fingers tingled then went numb. She grabbed her fingers and collapsed on the bed.

“Why are you crying, Colleen? You broke my nose!” His voice was pinched and muffled. He was holding one of his monogrammed handkerchiefs up to his nose, blood quickly soaking the fine linen and oozing over his hands.

She’d broken the man’s nose. Colleen Marie Macgregor lost her temper and broke a man’s nose. Her head was spinning from her momentary surge of anger and complete wonder. She flexed her fingers and winced at the pain, but she was happy she could move them. “I hurt my hand on your hard nose.”

“Serves you right.”

“Good Lord, you are a baby. So I broke your nose.”

With cool blue eyes, he looked down at her. “Well, this does not bode well for our marriage, Mrs. Ware.”

“Yes, you better make sure you carry on the tradition of English nobility, my lord earl, and sleep in a separate room. Just be certain to lock the door in between them.”

He stared at her, his eyes widening as her words sank in. “Are you threatening me?”

“I’m promising you that if you even think of holding me to this ridiculous marriage, you will fear for your life. Every night you will wonder if I will sneak into your room and stab you with a knife.”

“I promise you, Colleen”—his voice was soft as a kitten’s purr but lethal to her composure as it skated down her spine—“if you sneak into my room at night, I’ll be able to interest you in more entertaining nocturnal activities.”

*

Dinner was a strained affair. Both of Sebastian’s eyes were blackened, his nose swollen, so it was decided they would dine in Colleen’s home. Sebastian sat at the head of the table, scowling and sniping at her at every turn. He had no reason to be so hateful.

She looked at his swollen nose. Deciding he might have a tiny reason—okay a pretty big reason—to be irritated with her, she tried her best to be pleasant. To tell the truth, she was ashamed of what she had done. Her parents had always taught her not to strike another living thing in anger. Never in all her days had anyone, man or beast, caused her blood to boil the way Sebastian did.

“Oh, Colleen, you set such a pretty table.” Lady Anna sat on her right, a genuine smile on her face, her blue eyes sparkling.

She couldn’t help but return the smile. “Thank you, Anna. I do love to cook.”

Sebastian mumbled something she could not hear, then snorted. His mother shot him a hard look, and he quieted.

“Oh, Miss Macgregor, er…Ware… Oh, sweet heavens, what do we call you?” Mrs. Pearson asked.

“Mrs. Ware is fine with me.”

“Lady Penwyth,” Sebastian said, but this time he ignored his mother’s look. His voice was hard and his gaze never wavered. “You are to be called Lady Penwyth.”

She tightened her jaw as she felt her temper rising yet again. It didn’t take much where Sebastian was involved. “But I am fine with Mrs. Ware.”

His blue eyes darkened, his lips flattened. “You are a countess, and you will be called according to your title.”

“Really, Sebastian, don’t take that tone with me.”

The vicar, his wife and Colleen’s in-laws watched in fascination, their heads swinging from one end of the table to the other.

“I will take any kind of tone…” He stopped, apparently realizing they were squabbling like a couple of children.

Silence descended on the room. Nothing but the sound of silverware against her mother’s best china filled the air.

“Well, it is still hard to believe that you were just an orphan, no relations to hear of, and now, you are a countess,” said Mrs. Pearson, her kind voice releasing some of the gathered tension.

“You really have no family?” asked Anna.

“No. My father died when I was twelve, my mother a few years ago. My sister died last year. I do have some family in south England on my mother’s side and Scotland on my father’s side.”

“Why did you not go to them when you found yourself alone?” This came from her mother-in-law.

“Why would I? Really, I’m self-sufficient. My mother…well, she wasn’t the strongest of women, and my sister took after her. I tended the bills and the house from an early age. Besides, my parents married against their families’ wishes.”

Victoria’s eyes twinkled as she studied Colleen. “Do you happen to know your mother’s maiden name?”

“No. I think she never really overcame her family’s lack of support.”

“Lack of support?” Sebastian inquired.

Oh, so now he decided not to pout anymore? She turned in his direction and inwardly cringed at the injuries she’d given him. She didn’t know if it was her imagination or not but they seemed to be getting worse.

“My mother married my father, a second son with no money, and worse than that, a Scot. I understand they spirited away to Gretna Green.”

He studied her for a moment then asked, his voice ripe with condemnation, “And she felt she could not forgive them for not accepting such idiotic behavior?”

“Idiotic behavior?” Her voice had turned shrill, surprising her and the Pearsons. Colleen Macgregor did not speak in the tone of a fishwife.

“Yes, what would you call it?” When she didn’t answer him, he continued. “Their families didn’t agree with their marriage, and they ran off. Not very smart.”

She clutched her fork so tightly her knuckles were white. What would he do if she stabbed him in the leg with a fork? She hated violence of any kind, but with Sebastian around, she couldn’t help it. He seemed to bring it out in her. Not a good sign if their marriage did become permanent.

“But, Sebastian, that’s what you did, is it not?” Anna said. “Well, not the running away and marrying against your family’s wishes, but you married so fast I’m sure it was because you couldn’t wait.”

Someone snorted, and she was sure it was Mrs. Pearson. She watched Sebastian’s sneer smooth and turn into a mask of a smile. When he spoke, his snide tone had melted into the perfectly pitched intonation of a gentleman.

“Of course you are right, puss.” When he glanced at his sister, his eyes warmed, and Colleen’s heart skipped a beat. Lord, he was handsome even with his swollen nose and black eyes.

“Well, although I would enjoy nothing more than to take some more time to get to know you better, we need to start making plans for our return,” Victoria said. Colleen smiled at her mother-in-law. Even under the unusual circumstances, she’d accepted Colleen. “We will get up bright and early tomorrow and start the plans. I want to leave by Saturday.”

“Saturday?” Colleen squeaked. Silently, she counted the days. Panic slid through her. “Three days to get ready. I’ve too much to do. I need to pack and the house… What am I going to do with the house?”

Although he was still angry with Colleen, Sebastian couldn’t help but feel a little sorry for the impertinent woman. Her whole life was about to change, and for this woman, he knew that would be hard. He assumed she was a woman who would not acclimate well to change. She’d cocooned herself in York, hiding from society. If her mother had lived, he doubted Colleen would have turned out differently. She would have easily accepted a bland existence.

“Now, don’t you worry,” said Mrs. Pearson. “Lord Sebastian and I have had a long discussion on the matter, and I will take over the care of the house. In fact, you could probably find a family willing to rent it.” She patted Colleen’s hand but his wife didn’t appear to notice the gesture.

“But…but this is all I have left.” Her eyes shimmered with tears, and Sebastian, knowing his way around her now, decided he’d had enough. She would blame him if she embarrassed herself by breaking down in tears. He would rather she be mad at him.

“We don’t have time to lament the loss of your command over your house, Colleen. We need to make plans. Now quit your whining.”

His sister and Mrs. Pearson gasped. “Sebastian, really,” his mother admonished.

But he paid no heed. He watched Colleen’s eyes narrow and darken. That was more like it. She stood and threw her napkin on the table.

“I’ll just see to the dishes—”

“No need to worry about that. I will take care of that for you,” said Mrs. Pearson as she rose and joined Colleen in clearing the table. “You’ve had a trying day.”

Colleen shot a look at Sebastian that would have stopped his heart dead if she’d had the power. He crossed his arms and returned the look. He was the one with the throbbing nose and black eyes. If Daniel, the Earl of Bridgerton and his best friend, had been present, he’d never hear the end of it. The thought of telling Daniel of his situation, his marriage and the twit he was married to—who would rather waste her life as a spinster—made him cringe.

He turned his attention to his wife, his countess. Too tall, plain and given to horrible fashion choices, she and he were stuck. They went together as well as most couples in society. At least they still spoke at this point, although it had been less than a day. He’d never planned to remarry, but he guessed she was as good as any other.

Her glasses and freckles were not the most attractive but there was a quality, a type of reserved passion he knew he would uncover. She’d been restraining herself for so long she didn’t know how to express it. It was the reason he was sitting there with a broken nose.

“Yes, Colleen. You’ll need to prepare yourself for our wedding night.”

*

Colleen stomped down the hallway and started up the stairs when her mother-in-law stopped her.

“Colleen,” she said, waiting for her to turn. “I know you do not know me well, but I would be more than happy to answer any questions you may have.”

She cocked her head to one side and studied Lady Victoria. Her smooth ivory skin was pink with embarrassment, and Colleen could not help but smile.

“No, Lady Victoria. You and I know this is no love match, and I see no reason to pretend. Your son has no interest in me, and as soon as his senses clear, he’ll realize he really doesn’t like me and will grant me an annulment.”

“You truly think my son has no interest in you?” Her voice held a tone of pure amazement.

“I know.” She stepped forward and impulsively grabbed her mother-in-law’s hand. An emotion she could not name choked her as Victoria squeezed her hand around Colleen’s. “Your son, from what I gather, likes his women a little different than I. I know I am too tall and gangly and with all this red hair… Well, most men don’t like it.”