Never Enough: The Vipers MC (10 page)

 

Chapter Twelve

 

Jess

 

It was useless to fight against him. He was right—I was no match for his strength. Instead of fighting him, I melted into him. I let him hold me tight, pulling my body closer to his. My aching, needy body. The body I’d wanted him to touch again for so long. Too long.

 

My breasts pressed against his chest, and I felt the rapid drumbeat that was his strong heart. I matched the beat with my own as blood rushed in my ears and the whole world spun out of control. I didn’t care. Part of me rejoiced, actually—most of me rejoiced, reveling in the feeling of being touched again. Being kissed again. Being desired again. It was so foreign, to the point where I had almost tricked myself into forgetting how important it was. How all-consuming and crucial it was.

 

His tongue invaded my mouth, and I opened wider to let him in. My tongue touched his, then massaged it. He groaned, deep and low, the rumble reverberating in his chest. I shivered, knowing I could make him feel that way. Knowing he struggled as I struggled to keep himself under control.

 

His hands moved along my back, caressing me through the thin fabric of my camisole. His touch burned, but it was the kind of burn I wanted to feel again and again. The slightest pressure sent shockwaves through my body, all focused on that special area between my legs. An area that was already hot and wet, ready for more. It was like he’d flipped a switch.

 

I clawed his shoulders, our mouths still locked, the feel of his body beneath my hands only adding to the pleasure. His strong, thick shoulders. Just part of his powerful body. The arms that held me so tight, with the strength to crush me if he decided to. My knees went weak at the thought, and my body responded even more powerfully.

 

It wasn’t right. None of it was right. We shouldn’t have been doing it. Even as my nipples hardened and my breath came in short little gasps, I told myself it wasn’t right. Even as he lowered me onto the bed, one leg between mine until his thigh rested against the apex of my legs, I told myself we shouldn’t be doing it. We would only confuse ourselves. We would only make it even more difficult to say goodbye again. Because we would say goodbye. We had to. There was no way we could be together again, not after so much had happened. We couldn’t go back.

 

So why did I throw my head back with a sigh as Grayson’s mouth grazed my jaw, then my chin, before working its way down my throat? Why did I gasp and groan as his hands traveled over my body, caressing every inch of bare skin they could find? Why did my body scream for more, even as my mind screamed to stop? I had no idea. But my body won out. It always had where he was concerned.

 

Even as we made out, memories of the first time we ever made out like that came to mind. I hadn’t known anything about a man’s body except what I’d learned in Health class. Nothing could have prepared me for the sight and feeling of a denim-clad erection poking me. It hadn’t mattered, though. I’d given myself over to it, letting my body and Grayson’s hands take me where they wanted to go. I’d come for the first time that night, the pressure of him rubbing my mound while his free hand massaged my tender young breast enough to bring me to orgasm.

 

It was like that again, but even more so. Because I knew what was happening. I knew that the higher his hand crept up my leg, the wetter I would get and the harder it would be to contain my cries. I knew that when he brushed the tips of his fingers against my inner thigh, I would nearly collapse against him, desperate for a release from the delicious tension he was building inside me. I knew how rubbing my mound against his thigh would feel good, so good, almost too good. I knew how to hump him while driving my tongue deeper into his mouth, my hands now digging into his butt, pulling him closer to me, wanting more of him. I knew how to act, how to react, how to drive him crazy with my moans and sighs, with my mouth and hands. I knew how powerful it felt that he was turned on, too.

 

One of his hands ran over my shoulder, sliding a strap down my upper arm. He kissed my arm, my shoulder, then my chest. Goosebumps rose in the wake of his mouth, his tongue. He edged the top of the camisole down…down…until it brushed over my hard, taut nipple. He devoured me, sucking, licking, grunting. I went wild with pleasure, humping him even harder, pulling his thigh closer with the leg I wrapped around it. Taking what I needed.

 

I pulled his mouth from my breast for another kiss. His hand fondled me for a moment, before sliding between us. He took over for his thigh, applying just the right amount of pressure between my legs to leave me groaning into his mouth. He took a handful of my hair with his other hand, pulling, tangling his fingers in it.

 

I ripped my mouth from his long enough to whisper his name. “Yes, Grayson. Yes.” I kissed him again, my mouth aching from the force. I held his face close to mine, my hips jerking frantically as my body worked for what it needed, what it had missed over so many long, lonely nights in my cold bed. Nights when only my fantasies could keep me warm. It had been so long since a man brought me to orgasm—over seven years. I needed it. I wanted it, desperately. I wanted him.

 

His hand slid beneath my cotton shorts, rubbing me through my panties. I was sure my wetness had soaked through by then. It was incredible how turned-on he’d gotten me. And still we kissed, him humping my leg, me humping his hand. Our tongues thrashing together. I felt myself rising higher and higher…oh, God, was I going to…oh, God…oh…oh…!

 

A knock at the door. We both froze, our kiss ending, and in some twisted part of my brain I thought of two kids making out on the living room floor, hearing a car pull into the driveway. I almost laughed.

 

“Mama?” That wasn’t laugh-worthy. I closed my eyes, sinking into the bed a little bit.

 

“Yeah, baby?”

 

“What’s happening in there? Can I come in?” The knob turned. And there I was, splayed across the bed with one breast hanging out.

 

“No, sweetheart! No, you just stay there. I was just talking with my friend. Are you okay?” I looked at Grayson, who had a funny mixture of relief and chagrin on his face—and maybe a little blue ball-related pain. Otherwise, we hadn’t moved a muscle since David knocked.

 

“I can’t sleep. I’m too scared.” I could tell from the sound of his voice that he wasn’t putting on. I couldn’t blame him, either.

 

“Okay, honey. Be right there.” I sighed, putting a hand over my face as Grayson’s hand slid from between my thighs. I could have cried in frustration—I had been so close, too! I ached painfully, the pressure still at a fever pitch. It would have taken only another few moments to get me there. I was tempted to get back to it, if only for as long as it took for me to climax.

 

Responsibilities outweighed physical needs. I shot Grayson a look of apology, though I wasn’t entirely sure David’s knock hadn’t been well-timed, either. I might have gone down a very unfortunate path had he not interrupted us.

 

 

Chapter Thirteen

 

Grayson

 

I couldn’t believe it. The kid’s timing couldn’t have been better. The only good thing about it was he hadn’t walked into the room. Bad enough he would one day find out I was his father. He didn’t need to walk in on us humping on the bed before that.

 

“I have to go to him.” Jess got out of bed, straightening herself out while looking in the mirror on the back of the bedroom door. She pulled up the strap to her top, pulling it down, making sure she was covered again. Her hair was a mess, so she brushed it quickly before going out into the hall.

 

I sighed, knowing the moment was over. Would we ever get there again? If David hadn’t come to the door, would we have gone further? I thought we might have. My cock strained against my zipper. I would have done something about it.

 

I heard her voice, low and soothing, as she guided David back to his room. She was a good mother, no matter what I had said in the heat of anger. She had me so pissed then, I would have said anything. I could tell she cared for him, did everything she could to make him happy and make sure he felt loved. I had seen enough bad mothers in my time to know the difference.

 

All I could do was stare at the ceiling. What was I thinking, getting involved with her again? Even touching her the way I had, kissing her like that, was a big mistake. The less I felt for her, the better.

 

I couldn’t help myself, and I hated myself for being so weak, but there it was. She would always be part of me. The only reason I had hated her so much for so long was that I’d loved her so much when we were together. She was always the only woman for me. When she left, nothing else had mattered. It was the closest anything or anyone had ever come to breaking me.

 

She was in trouble. Worse trouble than she imagined. Then again, I wasn’t sure about that—she wasn’t a stupid person. She could probably imagine the trouble she was in with the loan sharks. I thought again about what they had done to Little Bill. Would that be how she ended up? With a bullet in her head?

 

I couldn’t let that happen. She wouldn’t like what I had in mind, but she had no choice. She had already fucked things up enough. I had to make it right as much as I could.

 

I got up, making sure I was presentable to a kid before going to the doorway to his room. What I saw made me stop and stare. There she was, kneeling by his bed. The nightlight glowed in the otherwise dark room, and in its light I saw the way she leaned over him, stroking the hair back from his forehead. She kept her voice low and soft, calming him. I could tell he was freaked out by what had happened earlier—who wouldn’t be? Especially a little kid.

 

I didn’t want to break into the moment, but I cleared my throat anyway to get their attention. Jess looked up. David’s head popped up from the pillow.

 

“You’re coming with me,” I said. I wasn’t trying to hide it or sugarcoat it for the kid’s benefit. It was a fact, plain and simple.

 

Jess looked stunned. She turned to David, who looked at her with wide eyes. They both turned to me. “What?” Jess asked.

 

“You heard me. Get his things together, then get some things together for yourself. You’re staying at my place until this calms down. There’s plenty of room for the both of you.”

 

Jess laughed like she thought I was kidding. When she saw how serious I was, her laughter died. She glared at me.

 

“Who do you think you are, coming in here like this, telling me what to do? You don’t get to make those decisions, Grayson.”

 

“I think I do, and I think you know why.” No use fucking the kid up even more by telling him who I was to him. He would already need therapy after the scare he’d had that night. “I have a say in this. You can’t handle it yourself. No more arguments. Get your things together, now.”

 

“Where are we going, Mama?” David tugged at Jess’s arm. He sounded terrified.
I’m not the one you have to be scared of, kid
, I thought.

 

“Jess, tell him he doesn’t have anything to worry about, okay? Please?”

 

She looked like she didn’t know what to do, so I made the decision for her. I walked into the room and knelt at the foot of the bed—close to them, but not so close as to scare him anymore.

 

“My name is Grayson, and I’m a friend of your mom’s. I came here tonight because that other man was here. The bad one. I made him go away because that’s what I do. I protect people. You know what that means?”

 

He peeked out at me from behind Jess’s arm, where he’d hidden himself. “You make them safe?”

 

“That’s right. I make sure people are safe. I like your mom a lot. We’re real good friends. And you’re her son, so I wanna make sure you’re both safe from the bad guys. I’ll do that, too. When you’re with me, nothing bad will happen.”

 

“No more bad guys coming in? When I’m sleeping, I mean?” His voice shook. I didn’t know who to be more pissed at—the piece of shit who broke in, or my ex-wife for getting herself into the whole mess.

 

“No more bad guys coming in while you’re sleeping. Besides, you would be doing me a favor if you came with me.”

 

“What do you mean?” Jess didn’t say a word, and that was a good thing. She was still smart when it counted.

 

“I mean I would be worried about you if you were here without me. I would wonder if you were okay. If you’re with me, and I can see you and talk to you and make sure you’re safe, I’ll feel a lot better. You would be doing a good thing.”

 

David’s eyes lit up. He looked up at Jess. “Mama, we have to go. He’ll keep us safe, and it’ll make him feel better.”

 

Jess scowled at me.
I hate you
, she mouthed.

 

I know
, I mouthed back. I didn’t care. All that mattered was keeping her and my kid safe from whatever was out there, trying to hurt them.

 

***

 

It took a half hour to get everything together. It seemed like David kept coming up with things he had to take with him.

 

“Oh, my froggy.” He packed a stuffed frog in his backpack. “And my bear. And my X-Men. Did you ever play with X-Men?” he asked me.

 

“No. They didn’t have those guys when I was your age. I mean, they had the comics, but not the action figures.”

 

“So what kind of things did you play with?” he asked. I could tell from the gentle, serious way he packed them that they meant everything to him.

 

“Oh, I don’t know. I had toys. And a bike. And games. We just didn’t have such cool things when we were kids. You’re really lucky.”

 

“I know. Mama always makes sure I have stuff. And Santa, too.” I turned my face away to hide my grin. So he still believed in Santa. That was sweet.

 

He looked so much like me. I thought back to when I was his age. I didn’t have many toys—not as many as he had, for sure. Everything I got was handed down from my older brother, and by the time I got my hands on it, the figures were sorta broken, or drawn on, or missing pieces. It wasn’t the same as having something brand new, something that had only ever belonged to me. I used to envy the kids I went to school with, who brought in toys for show-and-tell. Their toys were always new, shiny. Sometimes I would pretend to be sick, just to miss out on show-and-tell day.

 

If he were any older, there would be no pretending we weren’t related. He was young enough not to notice, or not to care, that our eyes were exactly the same shade, just like our hair color. That we had the same face, just in older and younger versions. I was glad for his youth—the situation was sticky enough without him asking questions. He was still little enough to accept what adults told him without argument.

 

“I think I have everything,” he said, sliding his arms into the straps.

 

“You sure you can handle that, little man?” The backpack was almost as big as him.

 

He nodded. “Oh, sure. I carry it all the time.” He was right, too. He was a pro, lifting it off the bed like it was nothing. I watched as he looked around the room. It was a nice room, a good-sized room for a little boy. I saw his chin quiver a little bit.

 

“What’s up?” I asked.

 

“Will I ever come back here again?”

 

I wanted so much to hug him, it almost hurt. I couldn’t believe how fast a kid I didn’t know existed two hours earlier had made me care about him. “Sure you will,” I said. “You’ll be back in no time. This isn’t forever.”

 

“You promise?” He looked at me, and I knew he wanted to believe me. He wanted to trust me. He needed a man in his life he could trust.

 

“Yeah, I promise,” I said. “Just like I promise the bad guys won’t hurt you. Okay? You believe me?”

 

He thought about it for a second, then nodded. “Yeah. I believe you.”

 

I wished his voice sounded like he meant it. I wondered if he’d ever known a reliable man. Had his mother dated around? I thought about asking him, making it a casual question, but that wouldn’t have been right. I couldn’t use my kid like that, right after meeting him. Too many parents did that to their kids.

 

“Come on,” I said. “Let’s see if your mom is ready to go.” I put my hand on his little shoulder—it was so small, skinny, compared to my hand.
This is my son
, I thought. It still didn’t seem real. It would take a long time before it did, I guessed.

 

Jess waited for us with an overstuffed tote bag. “You sure you have enough stuff in there?” I asked.

 

“I’m sure this won’t be for long,” she said, smiling down at David. “I didn’t want to pack too many things since we’ll be coming home soon.”

 

I glared at her. “You sure about that? I mean, you’ll come home, yeah. But it might take a little time. I wouldn’t want anybody to get the wrong idea about how long it will take.” She had to be fucking delusional. I was sure of it. I could see making the kid feel better, but it didn’t do him any favors to lie. If anything, he would be even more upset when it took longer than he thought.

 

“I’ll be the one to decide whether somebody has the wrong idea,” she said, still smiling. I could have wrung her smug neck.

 

“And I’m the one asking you to stay with me, so I think I have some say in it.”

 

“Are we leaving?” David asked, rubbing his eyes. “I’m sleepy, Mama.”

 

She looked down at him, almost like she’d forgotten he was there. “Oh, of course, honey. I’m sorry. We’ll go right now. Come on, Grayson.” Like I was the butler or something. She left her tote on the floor, right next to another tote bag for David’s clothes and stuff. I took the hint that I was supposed to carry them for her. I sighed, picking them up.

 

“What about the locks on the door?” Jess asked. I had forgotten about kicking the door in.

 

“I’ll call a locksmith in the morning if it makes you feel better.” What I wanted to do was remind her that the asshole who’d broken in didn’t need to go through the front door, so if somebody wanted to steal her stuff, it didn’t matter if the locks worked or not. I didn’t wanna freak David out any more than he already was, though.

 

“You following me?” I asked, putting her bags in her car once we reached the garage.

 

“Yes, thanks.” I watched as she loaded David into the car, buckling him in. The poor kid was half-asleep. It would give me and his mother plenty of time to talk things over once we got to the apartment. I had a feeling she would have plenty to say once we were there. That was fine with me, since I had a lot to say, too. There would be some ground rules in place if I were going to help her get out of trouble.

 

I rode slower than usual, making sure she could follow behind me. I wasn’t used to taking my time when I rode my bike. It gave me time to think, at least. I thought about her. About the kid. About what I would do for them. What could I do for them? I didn’t know yet, but I had to figure something out. I needed to use my connections to find out exactly who Jess had borrowed money from, how much she owed and how they planned to get the money from her.

 

If it was just a matter of the money, I could give it to them without blinking an eye. Her original amount was five thousand dollars—I had more than enough in the bank to cover that twenty times over. Even with the interest I knew was growing every day, I could take care of it. Only I had the feeling that the loan shark she went to wasn’t only interested in money anymore. If he were, he could have had his guy rough the place up a little, look for valuables. Something.

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