Jonn stared at Hahldorn in unbelieving silence. “I can do something for him right now, though, Jonn. I will replace some of the energy he has lost. He’ll still be weak as a baby deer when he wakes, but it’ll put him back on the road to recovery.”
Jonn nodded gruffly. Turning back to Gaspi, Hahldorn leant over him and, cupping his hands, placed them over Gaspi’s chest. Hahldorn’s breathing slowed down, becoming rhythmic and steady, and from beneath his hands light began to radiate, glowing pink through his skin. The pink glow intensified to a deep red, white light peeking out from the gaps between fingers, and then faded gently away again. Once the light was gone, Jonn noticed Gaspi’s breathing was now deep and steady, just as Hahldorn’s had been a minute previously, and his pale cheeks had a redness to them. Gaspi’s arm twitched involuntarily, and he turn onto his side in his sleep.
“Thanks, Hahl,” Jonn said, awestruck by what he had just seen, but mostly just relieved that Gaspi was going to be okay.
“Not a problem, Jonn,” Hahldorn replied, sounding weary. “We can talk about this more tomorrow. Rest well.” And with that he left the room, and Jonn sat down next to Gaspi, determined to be awake when Gaspi came around. Jonn began his silent vigil, watching over the boy who felt in every way like his own. A child of his own flesh couldn’t mean more to Jonn than Gaspi did, and seeing him lying there, drained to exhaustion by such a hateful event, was painful.
In the deep of the night, a sob sounded from Jonn’s lips. It was Gaspi who had brought him back from madness after Rhetta had been killed. His love for his friend’s boy had given him a reason to live. In Gaspi he had found someone to love, and to protect, and earlier that evening he had thought for a short time that he might lose him. The thought of never seeing Gaspi grinning again, or fooling around with his friends, or shooting a goal on the ice, cut deeply into his heart, releasing an intensity of feeling he hadn’t allowed to surface since losing Rhetta. With no-one around to see him, Jonn abandoned himself to the flood of feelings rising in him, and sobbed from the heart: deep, gut-wrenching sobs wracked his body as he sat huddled over, arms clasped tightly around his knees.
Later that night, when the flow of emotions had ebbed to a trickle, Jonn pondered what was going to happen to Gaspi. If this really was the first manifestation of magic in him, then his entire life was going to change. For starters, he was going to have to go to the great city of Helioport and join the College of Collective Magicks. He would have to say goodbye to his friends, to the safe and simple life he had known, and learn to embrace a dangerous discipline. Everyone knew magical ability was as much a curse as a blessing, hard to handle and potentially lethal to the user. Many students died as their magic blazed out of their control and turned on them. Last night Gaspi had drained himself to exhaustion with his first magical act, and it scared Jonn to think how close Gaspi might have come to killing himself. The only thing Jonn knew was that where Gaspi went, he would go.
His purpose was simple from now on - to be Gaspi’s protector - and to do that, he would have to be strong. The night’s release of feelings would be a new start for Jonn, and he would have to make it last. Getting up he went to the pantry, and fishing out the bottles of Highland malt he had stashed away in the back, he stepped outside and poured them onto the ground, a great golden patch growing in the snow at his feet, and vowed never again to touch strong drink. Returning to his vigil, he sat up all night as Gaspi rested.
Chapter 3
It wasn’t until about midday the next day that Gaspi awoke. Rubbing his eyes, he peered around confusedly for a moment, then his eyes widened as memory resurfaced. Gaspi tried to sit up, but found himself unable to do so, and collapsed back on the bed.
“It’s alright, Gasp,” said Jonn. “Just lie still.”
“But last night I…” Gaspi trailed off. He looked uncertainly into Jonn’s eyes, and saw there the confirmation that his memory was correct, but also acceptance. “Brock and Jakko?” Gaspi asked tremulously.
“They’re messed up, but both will be fine,” Jonn answered. Breathing out a sigh of relief, Gaspi gave up trying to sit up. “How are you feeling, Gasp?” Jonn asked, concern evident in his tone.
“Very tired, but basically okay,” Gaspi answered.
“If you’re feeling up to it, can you tell me what happened?” Jonn asked tentatively. “I know what I saw but I’d like to hear it from you.”
Starting uncertainly, Gaspi started to describe what had happened. When he reached the point about Brock’s attack on Jonn he paused, looking again into Jonn’s eyes, unsure if this was something they could talk about.
“It’s okay, Gaspi. Carry on,” said Jonn, with a wave of his hand. Gaspi described how angry he had felt when Brock had said what he did, how that anger had grown until it seemed to break out of his body. He talked about how he had become aware of every living and natural thing around him, touching the essence of wood, and ice and rock, and even the creatures creeping on the ground or sleeping in the trees. He had known in that moment all of those things were his to command, and he had sent his anger flowing into them, releasing it all at Brock and Jakko.
At this point Gaspi stopped, horrified by what he had done. He had knowingly made those birds attack other human beings, and had not stopped when blood began to show. He had been aware of the pounding of their feet on the ice, had waited until they were in the very centre of the pond, and had shattered it beneath them. It was a miracle they weren’t dead, but Gaspi wasn’t sure he would be able to live with himself, even though they had survived.
“Gaspi, I understand what you’re feeling. I’ve never talked about it with you, but when those men killed Rhetta and your parents, I lost it completely. I’d been knocked out in the attack, and when I came around and saw…what they’d done, I became something else altogether - a kind of monster. There was a sword lying on the ground, and before they could even react I’d killed two of them. The remaining three men could probably have taken me, but my berserker rage must have terrified them, and they fled. I could have let them go, Gaspi, but I chased them down one by one. I murdered them, Gaspi, brutally and without mercy. The last one was begging for his life when I took it from him forever.”
Jonn stalled for a moment, staring into space with an expression Gaspi could only think of as haunted. Gaspi knew the story of his parents’ murder. Jonn had explained it to him when he felt Gaspi was old enough to hear the truth, but he’d never heard Jonn speak openly of his own experience of that evil day. It was hard to imagine his gentle guardian doing the things Jonn was describing.
Jonn started to speak again. “What I did that day drove me insane, Gaspi. It took me months to recover my mind, and it’s been one of the hardest things for me to live with; almost as hard as losing Rhetta, or not being able to protect your Ma and pa. What I’m trying to say is...I know what it means to lose control.”
“But Jonn,” replied Gaspi, “what happened to you was much worse than what happened to me. I mean, someone killed your wife and friends. Of course you were going to lose it. Brock was just…saying things.”
Jonn’s brow furrowed in thought. “Well, for one thing, neither Brock nor Jakko is dead,” he said. “I’m guessing you didn’t actually want to kill them?”
Gaspi thought about it for a moment before speaking. “You’re right, I didn’t want to kill them. I don’t even know what I wanted, but that’s what worries me. After I’d started, well you know…once the...”
“Magic,” Jonn interjected.
Astounded, Gaspi waited a moment before continuing. “Okay, once the…magic took over, I didn’t think about the consequences. I was wrapped up in the moment, in the power….it was unbelievable. I’m scared, Jonn.”
Placing his hand firmly on Gaspi’s shoulder, he tried to comfort him. “Gaspi, we don’t know anything about magic. Maybe that’s part of how it works. The most important thing is that we find out about it as quickly as possible. We need to take you to people who can train you in it, as soon as you are better.”
“You mean I have to leave Aemon’s Reach?” Gaspi asked, cottoning on straight away to the implications of what Jonn was saying.
“We don’t seem to have a choice, Gasp,” Jonn answered gently, his voice overflowing with sympathy. “This….gift of yours will grow out of control without proper training, and you can only get that in Helioport.”
Gaspi was silent for a few minutes. He stared at the ceiling, his brow furrowed, and Jonn could sense him grappling with the idea of the immense change that was thrust upon him. Jonn sat silently, not interrupting Gaspi, giving him time to work through his thoughts.
Finally, Gaspi looked at him again, his eyes showing he already knew the answer to his question. “What about Emmy? Taurnil? I’m going to have to say goodbye, aren’t I?”
Jonn sighed deeply. He looked steadily into Gaspi’s eyes. “I’ll be with you, Gaspi. You’ll never have to say goodbye to me.”
Gaspi sighed in return, and sagged back against the pillow. “When do we leave?”
Jonn hugged him then, speaking to him as he held him closely. “You’re such a brave lad, Gaspi. I’m proud of you.” Pulling back from him, he placed his big hands on Gaspi’s shoulders. “I’ve never been to Helioport, but when I was younger I travelled with your father. We went to some big towns, even a city, and they can be great fun. And this gift of yours: Hahldorn says it’s rare, so maybe it’s really important that you develop it. Maybe you can help people, do great things.”
Gaspi tried to smile to show appreciation for the effort Jonn was making to cheer him up, but all that Gaspi could feel was sadness at having to leave his friends behind. Jonn seemed to understand how deeply that would cut him. “Rest now, Gaspi,” he said gently. “I’ll make you some food when you wake up.” Once Gaspi had closed his eyes, Jonn lay down on his own bed, and fell asleep too.
Later that day they were both up and sitting at the small table in the kitchen, eating fried strips of boar and venison, when Hahldorn knocked on the door. Pulling up a third chair he joined them at the table, and allowed Jonn to pour him a cup of water.
“How are you feeling, Gaspi?” he asked.
“Okay, I guess,” Gaspi answered, unwilling to divulge his unexplored feelings about the previous night’s events, or on the colossal change his life was about to undergo.
“Feeling weak?” Hahldorn asked.
“Yeah, just coming into the kitchen was tiring,” Gaspi answered.
“You’ll need to rest a couple of days, but you’ll be fine after that,” Hahldorn said. The Healer seemed to be rallying himself for something.
“Listen, Gaspi,” he said seriously, “I don’t know how much Jonn has said to you and there’s no easy way to say this but what happened last night is going to change things forever for you. There’s no going back. What emerged in you was magic - and more to the point - nature magic. It is a powerful and rare gift, and very dangerous without training. You are going to have to study with the magicians in Helioport, and you are going to have to go soon, or your power will grow out of hand and something bad could happen.”
“Like last night?” Gaspi said quietly.
“Yes, like last night,” Hahldorn responded. “The villagers don’t really know what happened. Brock and Jakko don’t know what happened either but I do, boy, and when that power erupted in you, I felt it. It was like nothing I’ve ever sensed, like a caged lion fighting to escape.” Hahldorn’s eyes widened as he spoke. “I’m not saying this to frighten you. Any magic can be a great power for good, but without training you are a danger to everyone around you.”
Gaspi brooded silently, not responding to Hahldorn’s comments.
“There’s one more thing you need to know,” Hahldorn continued, looking at both Gaspi and Jonn. “You two will not be going alone. Martha had a dream last night. She has a lesser talent than me for healing, but few people know she occasionally gets visions, and they always prove to be accurate: She knew when that blizzard was going to hit last winter; it was her sight that showed us where to find Jonn when he was wondering in the forest, after…” He glanced apologetically at Jonn, who just shrugged and waved for him to carry on. Sitting upright and placing a hand firmly on each leg, Hahldorn continued. “She has always, always known that you are important, Gaspi.”
The people of Aemon’s Reach were not anti-magic as such, but they preferred not to hear too much about it. They accepted Hahldorn and Martha’s healing gift easily enough, as all villages in the mountains had a Healer, and it had become the norm, but prophecies and visions were another thing altogether, and were not spoken of.
“Martha dreamed last night of you and your friends. You were standing in a triangle, facing outwards, holding hands. She says it was a symbol of strength, that the three of you needed each other. There’s more to it than that, but that’s the essence of it. You will all have to go to Helioport.”
Gaspi was looking at Hahldorn keenly. “When you say my friends, you mean Taurnil and Emmy…Emea?” He felt a twinge of guilt at the hope blossoming in his heart, but he couldn’t help feel the burden that had sat on his shoulders all day lighten at this news.
“Yes, Gaspi,” Hahldorn responded. “I probably shouldn’t tell you this, but in Martha’s picture you all had a symbol over your heads. Yours was lightning, and we already know what that is about. Emea had the sign of a Healer: a ball of light held in cupped hands. Taurnil had the great bear, which is a symbol of protection. It seems that Emea has an untapped healing gift, and Taurnil is in some way going to protect you, or both of you.”
Hahldorn hadn’t been able to keep the pride out of his voice when speaking of Emea’s gift, and Gaspi was suddenly annoyed with him for finding any excitement in their situation. More than that he was annoyed with himself, for wanting his friends to have to leave their homes and everything they knew just so he could feel better.