My So-Called Family (4 page)

“No, it's during the day,” I said. “Her mom said it was a matinee.”

“So you'll be home for dinner?” he asked.

“I don't know,” I said. “I think we're going out for dinner after the show.” Actually, I hadn't even thought about dinner, but I figured it was safer to tell Mom and Simon that I wouldn't be home.

“I don't know about this,” Mom said. “You barely know your way around Riverdale. I'm not sure I want you wandering around Manhattan.”

“Mom, please,” I said. “We're not going to wander. Chase's going to drive us straight to the theater. He's a senior and he's a really good driver.” I had no idea what kind of driver Chase was, but I didn't think Avery's parents would let Chase take the car if he were a bad driver.

“What do you think?” Mom asked Simon.

“I think we should let her go,” Simon said. “As long as she's home before curfew.” I never had a curfew when we lived in Baltimore, but then again I'd never gone into a major city without my parents or other grown-ups around.

“So, what's my curfew?” I asked.

Mom and Simon said they would have to discuss it and they would tell me in the morning.

The next morning Mom and Simon told me I could go as long as I was back in Riverdale by nine thirty. “I don't care if you hang out at Avery's house after that, but I don't want you guys in Manhattan so late,” Mom said. “That should give you plenty of time to go to the matinee, get an early dinner, and drive back to Riverdale. Deal?”

“It's a deal,” I told her. “Thanks.”

“And you'll take your cell phone? And you'll call when you get there? And you'll call on your way home?”

“Yes, yes, and yes,” I told her. I would have agreed to just about anything because I was so excited—my first trip into Manhattan without my parents and my first Broadway show all in one day. Simon handed me forty dollars and told me to have fun. I went upstairs to get ready. Chase and Avery would be on their way to pick me up soon.

I
wanted to wear jeans, but Mom said since I was going to Broadway I should try to look a little nicer. She thought I should wear a skirt, but we compromised and I put on my black pants that stop just above my ankles, and one of my nicer-looking T-shirts. I went back downstairs to wait for Avery. Mom followed me down and kept reminding me to take my cell phone and call her when we got into Manhattan. I heard a car pull up outside and then a horn honking. “I bet that's Avery,” I said.

“I'll walk you out,” Mom said. I think sometimes she gets so used to Charlie being a little kid that she thinks of me as one too.

“I don't need you to walk me out, Mom,” I told her. “I'm not a baby.”

“I know, I know,” she said. “I just want to make sure you'll be home by nine thirty.”

The horn honked a second time. “I've got to go,” I said. “I'll tell them about the curfew and I'll call you later. I promise.” I pecked her on the cheek and ran out to the car. It was a sports car, and Chase had to get out of the driver's seat and move the seat forward so that I could squeeze into the back with Avery. The music was blaring—much louder than anything Simon or Mom had ever played in the car, and I knew it was better that Mom had stayed inside. I could see her peeking through the window in the front hall, but at least she couldn't hear anything.

Avery introduced me to Chase and Lizzie, who was sitting next to Chase. I noticed that everyone was wearing jeans, and I wished I were too. Avery had sunglasses pushed to the top of her head like a headband. Mom never likes me to wear my sunglasses like that because it stretches them out and then they can fall off when you're actually trying to wear them as sunglasses. “By the way,” Avery said, “next time you see my mom, don't mention we took the sports car. We were supposed to take my mom's sedan.”

“I love this car,” Lizzie said.

“My father loves it too,” Chase said. “It's his midlife crisis car.”

“Do you think there's a chance he'll let you take it to college next year?” Lizzie asked.

“Only if I'm at Yale,” Chase said.

“Oh, forget Yale,” Lizzie said. “I hope this year lasts forever. I don't want to even think about you being at Yale next year.”

“You're the one who brought it up,” Chase said. He reached over to turn the music up even louder. Lizzie turned away from Chase and looked out the window. We pulled onto the highway.

I could see the clock on the dashboard from the backseat. It said 2:14. “The play starts at three, right?” I asked. I had to talk louder than usual because of the music. Simon had told me it takes about a half hour to get into Manhattan from Riverdale. But then we'd have to park the car and walk to the theater and find our seats. I hoped we wouldn't be late. I'm the type of person who's always on time for things.

“It doesn't matter,” Avery said. “There's been a change of plans.”

I was about to ask what she meant when Chase said, “That's right. We're going to Lizzie's aunt's house instead.”

“How come?” I asked.

“Because she's not home,” Lizzie said.

“But what about the play?” I asked.

“Oh, come on,” Chase said. “It's
The Lion King
. Do you really want to see it? It's practically a cartoon.”

“No,” I said, “I guess not.” I didn't say it out loud, but
The Lion King
is one of the movies I actually like watching with Charlie.

“What if your mom asks about the play?” I whispered to Avery. Well, it wasn't really a whisper; it was more like my regular voice that sounded like a whisper over the music.

“It's no big deal,” Avery said. “We've all seen the movie, right?” I nodded. “Well, how different could it be?”

Simon was right about how long it takes to get to Manhattan. We got off the highway, and Lizzie turned the music down so she could give Chase directions. “Make a left on Eighty-sixth Street and then a right on Lexington. Now make another right. There, it's the building there on the right.” We had to drive around the corner a couple times to find a parking spot, and then we walked back around the block to Lizzie's aunt's building. There was a doorman out front and a sign that said
ALL VISITORS MUST BE ANNOUNCED
. I thought maybe he wouldn't let us in since we didn't live in the building and Lizzie's aunt wasn't home for him to announce us to, but he smiled and tipped his hat when he saw us coming. “Well, if it isn't my favorite visitor,” the doorman said.

“Hey, Larry,” Lizzie said.

“Your aunt's not home, you know,” Larry said.

“I know,” Lizzie said. “I have the key.” She pulled a ring of keys out of her pocket and swung them like a hula hoop around her finger. Larry held the door open for us, and we walked into the building. Lizzie pressed the button for the elevator.

Now that we were officially in Manhattan, I knew I had to call home and check in, but I felt kind of dumb about it. After all, no one else seemed concerned with checking in with their parents. So when we got upstairs, I went into the bathroom and called Mom from my cell phone so no one would see me and I wouldn't feel like a baby. The answering machine picked up and I left a quick message that we'd made it into Manhattan and that I'd call again on our way home. I flushed the toilet and washed my hands even though I hadn't really used the bathroom, and then I walked back out into the living room. Avery was sitting on an ottoman. Chase was sitting on the floor with his knees up, and Lizzie was on the couch with her legs outstretched, her feet resting on Chase's knees. I sat down on the other side of the couch, wondering what we were going to do now that we were there.

“I'm starving,” Chase said.

“Okay, I'll check out the kitchen,” Lizzie said. She lifted her feet from Chase's knees. I watched him absently reach out and pat her ankle as she walked past him. A few seconds later she came back out. “There's absolutely nothing to eat,” she said. “I guess they threw everything out before they went away. But we could go out and get something to eat if you want.”

“No, that's all right,” Chase said. “How about a tour of the rest of the apartment?”

I started to get up but Avery stayed seated, and I realized we weren't invited. Chase trailed behind Lizzie, and after a few seconds I heard a door close down the hall. “Well, I'm still hungry,” Avery said. “I didn't even eat lunch. Did you?”

“I ate at home,” I said.

“I think I'm getting my period,” Avery said. “I'm starving even though I feel bloated. Do you have yours?”

“Not right now,” I told her.

“I meant, do you have it at all?” Avery asked. I nodded. The truth was I had only gotten it once, a few months ago. I wasn't even sure it really was my period because it was just spotting. It didn't even look like blood—it was more rust-colored than red, and it only lasted a couple of days. Mom said it could take a while before I actually got my period regularly, but she bought me a box of maxi pads to keep in my bathroom just in case. So far I hadn't used them.

“We could go out and see if there's anything to eat,” Avery said. “You could get a snack or a soda or something.”

“I don't know,” I said. “What if Chase and Lizzie come out and can't find us?”

“We'll leave a note,” Avery said. “We won't be gone for too long, and they'll be in there for a while. Anyway, I can't think of anything better to do. Can you?”

I knew Mom and Simon probably wouldn't have approved of Avery and me walking around Manhattan, but I couldn't think of anything else for us to do either. Besides, we were teenagers. I had been allowed to walk around our neighborhood in Maryland on my own, and I'd been allowed to walk around in Riverdale on my own. Avery didn't seem to think Manhattan was any different. “You're right,” I said. “Let's go.”

Avery wandered into the kitchen to find a pen and paper to write a note to Chase. We checked the door to make sure it wouldn't lock behind us, since Lizzie had taken the key with her, and we headed downstairs. Larry tipped his hat again when he saw us, and held open the door.

We hadn't turned on any of the lights in the apartment. The sun had been streaming through the blinds, so it hadn't felt like we had been sitting in the dark, but when we got outside, the sun was blinding and I had to squint. Avery pulled her sunglasses down from the top of her head. “I love this time of year, don't you?” she asked. She held out her arms and twirled around. I thought her sunglasses would fall off, but they didn't. “It almost still feels like summer, but not as humid. What's that called again?”

“I think it's called Indian summer,” I told her.

“Right,” she said. She spun around again. “I feel like dancing, don't you?”

“No,” I said. “Not here in the middle of the street.”

“Why not?”

“Well,” I said, “people could see us, for one thing.”

“Oh, Leah,” Avery said. “Don't be so uptight. You can't spend your time worrying about what other people think. I never do.” I wondered if that meant I shouldn't have worried about whether everyone thought I was a baby for calling Mom, or if I shouldn't have cared if Mom was worried about me. Avery grabbed my hand and spun herself around me. From down the block I heard Larry whistle. Avery took a bow and turned back to me. “You see?” she said. “It's no big deal.” I noticed that Avery said that a lot.

We found a deli a couple blocks away and bought chips and soda. Avery said she thought if we kept walking west, we'd hit Central Park. I didn't know which way was east and which was west. Mom had said she didn't want me wandering around Manhattan. I followed Avery since she seemed to know where to go, even though I remembered hearing that Central Park could be dangerous. I had heard of people getting attacked or kidnapped in the park. I pictured a man in a dark coat and a ski mask. I pictured his arms reaching out from behind a tree and pulling us into the woods. Maybe he would have a car parked back there. He would shove us into the car and drive us away, and no one would know where to look for us. Our parents thought we were at a play, and we hadn't even told Chase we were going to Central Park.

Avery was skipping down the block. “Come on, Leah,” she called. I felt stupid for worrying about things that I knew probably weren't going to happen, but maybe if you worry about them, you can make sure they don't come true. Sort of like jinxing it. I thought to myself,
Please don't let us be kidnapped
, and then I raced to catch up with Avery.

W
e didn't meet up with any kidnappers in Central Park. Instead we picnicked on the grass next to a huge building that Avery said was a famous museum. Later on we headed back to the apartment. Avery and I flopped onto the couch. Chase and Lizzie were still nowhere to be seen. “We were gone for so long,” I said. “What do you think they're doing?”

“Making out or making up or something,” Avery said.

“What do you mean?” I asked. “They weren't fighting.”

“In the car,” she explained. “Chase said something about Yale and Lizzie got upset.”

“She didn't seem to be upset for too long,” I said.

“I know,” Avery said. “But this is why my dad's so worried about Yale. Chase always feels guilty about maybe having to leave Lizzie behind next year. He barely thinks about anything else. It's like Lizzie is the only person in the world.”

“Oh,” I said.

“Anyway, I'm bored,” Avery said. “I saw a computer down the hall. Let's go check e-mail.”

Mom has always been protective of her computer. She gets nervous that someone will press the wrong button and then whatever book she's working on will disappear. When she's on a deadline, no one is allowed to go near her computer, not even Simon. Mom even got me my own computer so I wouldn't have to use hers. I didn't think we should use Lizzie's aunt's computer in case Lizzie's aunt was like Mom, but I didn't say anything to Avery. It's confusing not to worry about what people are thinking—should you not worry about saying anything, or not worry about the thing you were going to say to begin with?

Avery logged into her e-mail. “Hey, look,” she said. “Brenna e-mailed me new ringtones from
America's Next Rock Star
. Do you watch that show?”

“No,” I said. “I'm not really into the reality shows.”

“I know. They're awful,” Avery said. “Chase hates them too. He says they're a way for the networks to make a lot of money without having to pay all the actors or come up with anything creative. It probably means I'm stupid, but I love them anyway. I wish I'd brought my cell phone.”

“I have mine,” I said. I pulled it out of my pocket and handed it to Avery.

“But you don't watch it,” she said.

“It's okay,” I told her. “If I hate them, I'll just switch it back.”

“You won't hate them,” Avery said. “I swear. Some of the singers are really good.” Avery flipped my phone open and dialed into the ringtones. “I'm going to program in my number, and Brenna's and Callie's numbers. Then I can program this to play different songs depending on which one of us is calling. Okay?”

“Sure,” I said.

“Oh, this is so cool,” Avery said. “They have this song that Luci Williams sang last week. It was her farewell song, actually, because she was voted off, which was totally unfair, by the way. She is so, so talented. I was practically crying when she sang!”

Avery downloaded the song by Luci Williams, and then she downloaded a couple of other songs to play when Brenna and Callie called. We called Brenna and Callie so they could call us back and make sure it worked. By the time we'd finished, Chase and Lizzie had come back out. “Are you guys ready?” Chase asked.

“For what?” Avery asked.

“Dinner,” Chase said. “Some kids who graduated last year are in the city, and we're going to meet up. Come on.”

We had to drive to another part of Manhattan to get to the restaurant. When we got into the car, I saw the clock on the dashboard said 7:03. If we'd gone to the play, we would probably already have been at a restaurant eating. Maybe we would've even been waiting for the check and getting ready to head back to Riverdale.

“How far away is the restaurant?” I asked.

“Uptown, near Columbia,” Chase said. “I guess about fifteen minutes.”

I calculated in my head—fifteen minutes to get there and thirty minutes to drive back to Riverdale. That left us nearly an hour and forty-five minutes to eat and get back to Riverdale by nine thirty.

The restaurant was called Nacho Mama's. We drove around and around again looking for a parking place nearby, but we couldn't find one. Finally Chase pulled into a lot. Chase's friends had already gotten a table.

“Hey, man,” Chase said. One of the guys sitting at the table stood up and gave Chase a sort of half hug, half pat on the back.

“Chase, man,” the guy said. “What'll it be?” The guy held up a pitcher of beer. I wondered how come they had beer on the table—I didn't think they were twenty-one. Maybe they had fake IDs. Mom would kill me if she knew.

“No thanks, man, nothing for me,” Chase said. “I'm driving.”

Avery leaned over to me. “They all call each other ‘man.' We should start counting because I'll bet they'll say ‘man,' like, a thousand times in the next couple of hours.”

The waiter dropped off menus for the four of us. Lizzie asked Chase's friend to pour her a drink. She sat up against Chase and he put his arm around her. Chase's friend offered Avery and me beer too.

“No way, man,” Chase said. “It's my little sister. She's, like, twelve.”

“I'm thirteen,” Avery said.

“Whatever,” Chase said.

“Sorry, man,” the guy said.

“See what I mean,” Avery whispered to me.

It took a while for everyone to decide what to get, but we finally ordered our food. Avery and I decided to split a plate of nachos and a quesadilla. The guy who had offered us the beer turned out to be named Ryan. Chase knew him because they had both played on the tennis team the year before.

“Come to Columbia, man,” Ryan said. “We could use someone with your backhand.”

“I don't know,” Chase said. “It's a little too close to home. Besides, I haven't been playing as much this year.”

“Oh no, Chase, it's perfect,” Lizzie said. “I could apply to NYU. I bet I'd get in, and then we'd only be a subway ride away from each other.”

Chase shrugged. “I'll think about it, man. Definitely,” he said.

I looked across the table at Lizzie. She was still squeezed up against Chase, and she picked up her beer and took a long sip. She held her glass to her mouth for so long that I wondered if she was actually drinking or just staring into it. I sort of felt sorry for her. I watched her hand as she finally moved the glass from her lips back to the table, her fingers gripped tightly around the handle. Chase rubbed his hand up and down her arm. “Hey, guys,” Ryan said. “Chin up. The food's here.”

The food was great. Avery and I devoured the nachos and most of the quesadilla, but it seemed to take everyone else a really long time to finish eating. Maybe because they were all talking and drinking, too. I had no idea how late it was. I tried to count backward and figure out how much time it had taken to drive to Columbia and park the car and walk to the restaurant and order the food and eat. Probably more than the time I had allotted for it. I pulled my cell phone out of my pocket and flipped it open to see the time. 9:42. “I'll be right back,” I told Avery. “I'm just gonna run to the bathroom.”

The waiter pointed me to the back of the restaurant. I walked in and dialed home. I leaned up against one of the sinks and listened to the phone ring.

Mom answered. “Leah?” she said.

“Yes, it's me,” I told her. “I'm sorry to be calling so late.”

“Where are you?” Mom asked.

“I'm with Avery,” I said. “You said it was all right to stay out past nine thirty as long as we were back in Riverdale.”

“Yes, yes,” Mom said. “That's fine. So, where are you?”

“At Avery's,” I said as my phone beeped.

“What?” Mom asked.

“I'm at Avery's house, but I think my phone's about to die,” I said. I guess downloading all those ringtones had used up most of the battery.

“I'll call you back at Avery's,” Mom said.

“Um, I don't know the number,” I said. “And Avery is in the other room.”

“I have it,” Mom said. “It's in the school directory.”

“You can't call,” I said. My phone beeped again. It was about to disconnect me.

“Why not?” I didn't answer. “Leah,” Mom said, “where are you?”

I took a deep breath. There wasn't enough time to make something up.

“Leah, where are you?” she said again. This time it didn't sound like a question. It sounded like an accusation.

“We're in Manhattan,” I said.

I heard Mom breathe in, about to say something. Then the line went dead. I snapped my phone shut and shoved it back into my pocket. Even though I was alone in the bathroom, my cheeks flushed the way they did when people were watching me. I looked into the mirror and waited for them to turn back to their normal color.

“Everything okay?” Chase asked when I got back to the table.

Of course it wasn't okay. My mother was probably planning how long she would ground me. I wished we were home, and I felt like a baby. No matter what Avery said, I wasn't very good about not worrying what other people thought of me. I couldn't help it. Anyway, it was easy for Avery to say. She had a normal family; she was popular; she had parents who let her and her brother go into Manhattan on their own. If I told Chase what had happened, he would think I was a baby too. “Everything's fine,” I said.

We finally left the restaurant and walked back to the parking lot to get the car. It didn't take long to get home from Columbia. Avery asked me if I wanted to sleep over, and I seriously considered it. I would be in trouble no matter what, so why not delay it until the morning? But then I had visions of Mom and Simon calling the police and reporting me as a missing person, lost somewhere in Manhattan. “No,” I said. “I should just go home.”

Simon and Mom were sitting at the dining room table when I walked in the door. “Leah,” Mom said. “It's nearly eleven o'clock.”

“I'm sorry,” I said.

“You're sorry? Are you kidding me?” Simon asked. “We've been trying to call you back for over an hour. We were worried sick.”

“I'm really sorry,” I said. “My phone died.” I pulled it out of my pocket and held it up to show them.

“Your phone has nothing to do with your being in Manhattan until eleven o'clock,” Mom said.

“What did you want me to do? We were at dinner, and the food took a really long time. I called you as soon as I saw how late it was.”

“And then you lied,” she said.

“I didn't want you to be upset,” I said.

“Well, that turned out really well for you, didn't it?” she said.

“It's not like I did anything unsafe,” I told them. “I was with Avery and her brother the whole time. We were at a restaurant. We weren't wandering around.”

“I don't care where you were,” Mom said. “You weren't where you promised you would be.” She looked over at Simon.

“That's right,” he said. “But from now on you're going to be exactly where we tell you to be.”

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“You're grounded,” Simon said. “Until further notice. That means you come straight home after school. You do your homework. And no cell phone calls unless they're to Mom or me.”

Even though I knew it was coming, it still felt like they'd kicked me in the stomach. I was just starting to make new friends. But Avery already had Brenna and Callie. If I couldn't hang out with her, she would probably forget all about me. “Please,” I said. “I didn't mean for this to happen. You're going to make me lose my friends.”

“You should have thought of that before,” Mom said.

“But I did,” I said. “I really was thinking about you guys the whole time. I wanted to come home, but we were stuck in a restaurant. It's not my fault!”

“Keep your voice down,” Mom said.

“Chase and Avery don't have a curfew,” I said.

“Maybe these aren't the kinds of friends you should be hanging out with anyway. They seem a bit wild. Letting your kids drive into Manhattan by themselves without a curfew is crazy to me.”

“You don't know them at all,” I said. “You're the one who's crazy!”

“Mommy!” Charlie called.

“Oh, Leah,” Mom said. “Now you woke your brother.”

“I don't care,” I said as Mom got up from the table to head upstairs. I heard Charlie calling her again.

“I'm coming,” Mom called.

“What's gotten into you, Leah?” Simon said. “All you had to do was call. If you couldn't get home, we could have figured something out. I would have come to get you. We made it so easy on you.”

“Easy on me?” I said. “You have no idea how hard it is to be me. You don't even care about me.”