More Flirts! 5 Romantic Short Stories (The Flirts! Short Stories Collections) (6 page)

“True.” Aubrey sat thinking for a minute, and then jumped up from the couch. “This is brilliant! They’ll tell me everything I did wrong! I’m going to get started today.”

“We’ve still got fifteen minutes left,” Diana called out, tapping her watch, as Aubrey dashed out the door.

“Take a break! Go get a cup of coffee!” Aubrey hollered back.

Aubrey went straight home and started composing a fifty-part relationship-in-review questionnaire. Some were yes-no questions, others had a few lines for essay style answers, and others had a points-ranking system from one to ten. She was pretty confident she’d score high on the “Was I a good kisser?” question. She changed “Was I too dramatic?” from a yes/no question to an essay question, and added a 1-10 scale. A few of her exes may have mentioned the word drama from time to time.

After a bit of research on the Internet, she was excited to find all but one of the guys still lived in the Boston area. Surprisingly, Simon had moved to rural Vermont, but a road trip never hurt anyone. With a smile, she curled up in bed, excited to find out where she’d gone wrong—so she could start getting things right.

***

The following morning at work, Aubrey announced that she’d need the next two days off as personal days.

“What for?” asked Barb, the perpetually frowning woman in HR.

Aubrey crossed her arms. “It’s personal. That’s why they’re called personal days.”

“Very well. We’ll see you on Monday.”

“Make sure you put out the M&M’s tomorrow. That’s what everyone voted on. They’re in my top desk drawer.”

Barb set down her I Love My Cockapoo coffee mug. “Is that necessary?”

“Unless you want a full-on office revolt.”

“Fine.”

During her lunch break, Aubrey called the dreamy guy she’d dated three years earlier. She still had Ian’s contact information in her cell. Guess she was hopeful they’d get back together. But she’d never heard from him again after he dumped her. Hopefully, he still had the same number. Her hands shook as she dialed. She’d taken the breakup with Ian hard. He made excellent French toast and was a fabulous kisser—French and all other kinds.

The phone rang four times before he picked up. “Hello?”

“Ian? It’s Aubrey Carter.”

He said nothing.

“We used to date?”

“Of course—yes. I’m just surprised to hear from you.”

She twirled a piece of hair around her finger. “How are you?”

“Great. I’m great.”

She was about to ask if he still had six-pack abs, when she heard someone crying in the background. Her stomach flipped. “Is that a baby?”

“Yes, it is.”

The piece of hair slipped from her grip. “You have…a baby?”

He paused as the shrieking continued. “Yeah.” He hesitated. “My wife and I just had a baby.”

Her heart fell, but she reminded herself that the point of this investigation wasn’t to get back together with her exes; it was to find out what had gone wrong—fix it—and get on with her life. “Congratulations,” she said, sounding as enthusiastic as she could, which was tough, because Ian had been a really great guy. A pick-out-wedding-china guy. Apparently, someone else had thought so, too. Damn. She definitely would’ve given him another shot if he’d been interested. But then again, he did break up with her. Clearly something had been missing. He was a few years older than her; maybe he’d thought she was too immature.

Ian’s voice brought her back to the present. “Thanks. We’re real happy. So, what’s up? Why are you calling after all this time?”

She cleared her throat and gripped the phone. “I’m working on a project, sort of a historical perspective of my dating life, and I wanted to know if you could get together and answer some questions for me.”

“Questions?”

“About us. And what went wrong.”

“Oh. That’s easy. I had to focus on my career. I was up for that promotion, remember?”

“Yeah. But I wanted to talk about it more. I have some forms and questions…”

He laughed. “Of course you do. Okay, I can meet you tomorrow for lunch. Sound good?”

“How about JuJu’s? We’ll see if they still have those Reuben wraps.”

“Perfect. See you at noon.”

***

The next morning she got up early, squeezed in an extra long workout at the gym, and used the expensive body lotion she saved for special occasions. She’d just tried on outfit number four when the phone rang. “Hello?”

“Aubrey, it’s Ian. I can’t make it. Joshua is sick and I had to stay home from work with him.”

She checked herself out in the mirror. Her hair was looking way too good to cancel their date—their reunion. Their meeting. It was just a meeting. “You can bring him with you. I see babies out for lunch all the time.” A total lie, but surely babies could go out for lunch. They have to eat, too.

“He’s sick. I can’t take him out.”

“Then let me come to you. I’ll call in an order from JuJu’s and pick it up. Please? This is really important. And I’d love to see you. And your baby.” She tried not to sound desperate, but this was Ian George.

“You’re going to pester me about this until we sit down and have this conversation, aren’t you?”

She dug around her jewelry drawer for the perfect, dangling earrings. “You really know me, don’t you?”

“I do.” He gave her his address and she hung up slightly breathless. She’d have to compose herself better the next day and remember that Ian was a married man.

Aubrey rang the bell on the cute condo on Commonwealth, not far from her office, and gripped her clipboard. She steeled herself for whatever he was going to say about their relationship, but she wasn’t prepared for how good he looked when he opened the door. How had he become more handsome?

“Hey, you made it,” he said. His hair was a bit longer and his lean frame had filled out, making him look older, but hotter.

“I hope your wife doesn’t mind I’m stopping by,” Aubrey said.

Ian looked at the ground. “She wouldn’t care.”

“You didn’t mention I was coming here?”

“She’s in a meeting this morning. I didn’t want to bother her with our updated plans.” He blinked at her. “You look great,” he said, and then reached out for the seemingly mandatory, but awkward hug.

“Oh, thanks. You do, too.” She hugged him back, reminding herself not to squeeze a married man too tightly. Stepping out of the embrace, she held up the takeout bag. “Our lunch. Extra Thousand Island dressing for the wraps, of course.”

“Excellent. Come on in. Joshua is asleep right now.” He led her to the big, bright living room off to the side of the hall.

She followed, wondering if her mind purposely blanked out how broad his shoulders were. “When did you get married?”

He sat on the couch. “Last year.”

“Wow. You had the baby right away.”

He rubbed the back of his neck. “Yes, we did.”

She sat next to him and set the clipboard on her lap. “What does your wife do?”

“She’s a realtor.”

“And you? Are you still in pharmaceutical sales?”

He pursed his lips. “Haven’t moved on to anything new yet.”

The easy banter they used to share was gone, she thought, sadly. She’d once called in sick to work because she’d spent all night on the phone talking with him. Now their conversation felt like an empty ketchup bottle—they were trying hard, but just barely squeezing out the words.

Damn. Maybe this was a bad idea
. “Well, let’s get down to business.” She held out the clipboard and a pencil. “My therapist suggested I talk with my exes to find out what went wrong. Haven’t been too lucky in the love department, and I wanted to do something proactive about it. I want what you’ve got, Ian.”

He blinked at her, confused.

“The wife and baby. Well, a husband in my case,” she laughed nervously.

“I can’t imagine you’re having a hard time meeting men, Aubrey.”

“I’m having a hard time keeping men. And I want to know why.”

He stared at her for a moment and she wondered if he felt the same tension between them that she did. Was he remembering all the good times, too? “Sure,” he said. “I’d be happy to fill this out for you.” Their fingers swiped as he took the clipboard and a shock had Aubrey jerking her hand back.

“Sorry,” they both said at the same time, smiling at each other.

That’s when the front door opened, and a pretty blonde hurried in, dropping her purse and kicking off her heels in the front hall. “I slipped out on my break so I could check on Josh.” She looked up and her eyes widened.

Aubrey and Ian both stood up. Then Ian rushed over and put his arm around her. “Honey, what a surprise. What a big, big surprise to see you here. Joshua’s fine. Don’t you trust me with our son?”

The woman’s face showed no emotion as she looked over at Aubrey.

Aubrey waved. “Hi, I’m Aubrey. An old friend of Ian’s.”

“Old girlfriend, actually,” Ian said. “She is here doing some research on what went wrong in her relationships.”

“He’s giving me feedback,” Aubrey offered.

“Feedback,” Ian said, kissing his wife’s cheek. He looked at Aubrey. “I am so rude, this is my wife, Monica. Monica, this is Aubrey.”

Aubrey waved again as her heart pounded.

A wary smile cracked Monica’s face. “It’s nice to meet you. I was just surprised to see Ian had company.” Ian kissed her again on the cheek, and Monica pushed away from him. “Where’s Josh?”

“He’s sleeping. It took forever to get him down for his nap. Do not wake him up or, or there’s no nookie for you tonight.” He waved a finger at Monica.

“Nookie?” Aubrey asked.

“Nookie. She likes to call it nookie,” Ian said.

“I do not—my love.” Monica frowned, and then tiptoed up the stairs, while Aubrey and Ian sat down. Aubrey was certain her cheeks must be pink, like Monica knew Aubrey had been ogling her husband. “Do you want me to leave? I don’t want to upset your wife.”

“No, it’s fine. She won’t care. Let me look at some of these questions.” He read over the paperwork, smiling, even laughing at times. Then his face paled. “Some very detailed questions pertaining to the bedroom.” He blinked. “I don’t think we even did what you’re talking about in question thirty-five.”

She closed her eyes. Damn. They hadn’t, had they? “Just answer it the best you can. I need to know everything.”

Monica came back in the room and sat in a chair across from the couch. “What’ve you got there, Ian?”

He held the papers against his chest. “This is Aubrey’s questionnaire to figure out why she’s been unlucky in love. I’m supposed to dissect our relationship.”

Aubrey looked at her shoes and blushed.

“So, why did you leave her, Ian? She’s cute.”

Aubrey popped up from the couch. “I’m going to leave you two alone. Ian, just mail that to me as soon as you can. I know you’re busy with the new baby and all. And the wife. And the nookie.”

“Don’t let him fool you, Aubrey. There’s not too much of that these days,” Monica said through clenched teeth.

“Well, I’m sure he’s a great father. You’re lucky. I always considered Ian the one that got away.” Aubrey darted toward the door and could swear she heard Monica stifling a laugh.

“You didn’t even eat lunch!” Ian called after her.

But she wouldn’t be able to eat their favorite meal. Her stomach was too upset for that. That stupid saying about time healing wounds? It wasn’t true. There should be another saying about seeing your ex and his new family and having it sear a hole in your heart, cavernous and cold enough to store all the extra Lean Cuisines you buy when they’re on sale. She was a bargain shopper by heart, and old habits die hard, even when you find out you’re worth millions.

***

After grabbing a burger and fries at the drive through, Aubrey sat in the parking lot to regroup. The day was still young, her hair still look good, and five men remained on her list. When The Rolling Stones came on the radio, she belted out the words to
Start Me Up
and put her confidence back where it belonged, even though her heart was still out of place after seeing Ian and his new life.

Tilting the rear-view mirror, she freshened up her lipstick. Who should she call next? She narrowed her eyes. Who would put Ian out of her mind? “Dane Coleman,” she said to herself in a breathy voice, then smacking her lips. The hottest guy she’d ever dated. After checking her notes, she dialed the construction company he was working for and crossed her fingers.

Her pitch dropped down to her receptionist voice. “Is Dane Coleman in?” she asked the receptionist.

“He’s out at the jobsite, can I take a message?”

Aubrey summoned her urgent, important voice. “Um, yes. This is his veterinary office calling. We really, really need to speak with him about his dog’s procedure.” Schools and vets—Aubrey always patched them through, no questions asked.

“His dog? He’s got a cat.”

“Oh, yes. Silly me. I thought it was one of those little yippy dogs that look like a cat. How can I get in touch with him? It is quite important.”

“Oh, of course. Let me give you his cell number. Hopefully, he’ll answer”

Aubrey wrote down the number. “Say, is he working on that the project I’ve seen over on Newbury Street?”

“No, the one on Fairfield Street.”

“Ah, yes. Thanks.” Aubrey hung up, and decided to go right to the source and visit Dane at work before her makeup started getting cakey.

After pulling her hair back the way Dane liked it—then letting it down because screw him, he did dump her after all—Aubrey made her way to the site.

She parked across the street from the construction site and spotted a worker leaving the port-a-potty. “Hi, there. Do you know where Dane Coleman is?”

The man took his time looking her up and down and offered his hand. “I’m Dane Coleman. How can I do you? I mean, what can I do for you?”

“You’re not Dane. I used to date him. Can you tell me where he is?”

“That lucky S.O.B. He doesn’t deserve women like you.” The man shrugged and grinned. “Can’t blame me for trying.” He pointed to a trailer by the parking lot. “Should be in there.”

“Thanks!” she shouted over the beeping of a truck in reverse. She walked over to the trailer and took a deep breath before she knocked.