Mollywood (32 page)

“You, Robbie.
You
are the man.” She said with a fierce, serious tone that would have sounded preposterous coming from anyone else.

“Thanks, Molly. It’s a good deal. You did the right thing.” He replied, glancing awkwardly at me. I shook his hand without a word. Robbie and I would never be tight, but the fact that he’d stepped up to the plate for Molly like he had seriously elevated his status in my book.

He led us down the hall to a junior partner that he’d recommended to handle our real estate transaction. It took us no time at all to go over the paperwork we needed to sign for the home purchase. We were all set to take possession on December fifteenth, which had our families in an uproar.

Everyone on both sides was stunned that we’d chosen to move in the middle of winter. Why this came as a surprise when we’d been house hunting like we had was beyond me. Tamryn’s reaction annoyed the shit out of me, she seemed terribly put out that we were moving so close to the holidays. I wanted to shake the shit out of her.

Tamryn and Betty were conspiring to organize both families to come move us since Molly couldn’t paint or lift anything. Molly’s friends, Jay and Lisa, offered to pack up the apartment in exchange for pizza and beer. Molly freaked out at the mere mention of this and the first words out of her mouth had been “We need to collect our ‘bedroom paraphernalia’ and lock it in the fire safe.”

“There won’t be enough room in the fire safe for all of it. I’ll buy a trunk.” I had replied, though secretly I was already making plans to hire movers. Mason and Mac would be too busy helping me finish off the painting and remounting some of the wood work that needed a little TLC from me. I wanted to use their help where it would be most beneficial. The way my sister was acting, I wouldn’t have asked for help if she was the last person on earth.

As Molly signed the papers, I noticed she was shaking and watched as she reached up and rub her temples.

“Hey.” I whispered. “You don’t look so good.”

“Flattery will get you everywhere, big boy.” She joked, but without much verve.

I reached to stroke her arm, not amused by her distraction tactics. “Do you need some Tylenol?”

“I took some already.” She admitted.

“I think it’s time for you to slow down, little girl.” I brushed a loose lock of her dark hair behind her ear and she frowned at me tiredly.

We headed over to the house to get a look at Jeff’s progress on the kitchen. Molly had been totally blown away by his design, which I had to admit was pretty impressive. He used a lot of the original built in cabinets, but painted them white and made the lower bank glass front for a modern flair. He elected to use subway tile white backsplash for a vintage feel, and put up a silver tin ceiling to accentuate the stainless steel appliances. Molly mentioned substituting a double refrigerator, but Jeff said it would be too big for the space and I backed him up.

“You aren’t catering out of the kitchen, little girl. You’re just going to be cooking for us.”

“Fine.” She shot back. “But I want my six burner.”

“The whole idea of home is for relaxation.”

“Says the man who wanders off to carve when he’s stressed. Cooking relaxes me, Joe.”

Needless to say, her stove was ordered that day before we’d even made our formal offer

When we arrived at our new home, we found Nick there helping his father install the hood for Molly’s stove. It caught us off guard, and he looked a little embarrassed to be caught out of his element. Molly hugged him and thanked him profusely for making her dream kitchen a reality. I was surprised and humbled, considering how many hours the kid was putting in at Good Wood.

“It’s nothing, Joe. I’m glad to help.” Nick replied, as I shook his hand.

“It’s not nothin’. I won’t forget this.” I mumbled as Molly bantered happily with his dad.

As we headed back out to the truck, Molly nearly stumbled on the stairs.

“Whoa!” I grabbed her and held her tight against me. My heart slammed into the wall of my chest as if it had sprouted wings and decided to take off.

“I’m sorry, baby.” She groaned, looking exhausted and a little out of it.

“Molly, you’re pushing yourself way too hard.” I replied, and I cautiously helped her into the truck.

Forty five minutes later, Dr. Myers backed me up.

“Molly, your measurements look good, but your blood pressure has been elevated at the last two visits. Have you noticed any swelling in your feet, face, or hands?”

“No.” Molly shook her head.

“Yes.” I said simultaneously, and looked at her in disbelief. Molly whipped her head around in awkward surprise.

The doctor looked from me to her and arched an eyebrow. “Any headaches?”

“Yes.” Molly confessed.

“How often?” Dr. Myers pressed on.

“About twice a day.” Molly replied softly. It was my turn to whip my head in her direction. I knew she had headaches from time to time, but I had no idea they’d been so frequent.

The doctor pulled up her stool and fixed Molly with a weighty stare.

“I’m concerned.” Dr. Myers started. “You’re displaying classic symptoms of a condition known as pre-eclampsia.”

The doctor explained at length how Molly needed to take it easy, reiterating almost everything I had told her. If she didn’t, Dr. Myers promised she’d admit her to the hospital for mandatory bed rest. They reached a compromise that Molly could work for a maximum of four hours a day as long as she took plenty of breaks.

The entire time the doctor lectured her, Molly kept glancing at me, almost as if she suspected the doctor and I were in cahoots. Not that I wouldn’t have slipped the doc some cash if I thought it would help slow her down. The doctor said the only cure for pre-eclampsia was delivery, and that it was way too early for that. By the end of the visit, my anxiety level was higher than it had been in a long time.

Our ride home was quiet as we both reflected on our day. We’d been home less than ten minutes when Molly’s phone rang. Listening to her side of the conversation, I gathered that she intended to go back out to the truck. Snatching her phone out of her hand, I ignored her look of outrage and informed the caller, who I immediately learned was Carly, that they needed to work around the issue or close the truck for the night. I told her if they were really desperate, they needed to call Sanchez or Stacy for further instructions. Then I simply ended the call. Molly looked steamed. She turned, stormed into the bedroom, and slammed the door.

I immediately followed, and when I swung the door open, she hurled a flip flop at my head. I caught it in midair and dropped it to the ground.

“Okay, I know you’re pissed…” I began, but she wasn’t in the mood to listen.

“How fucking
dare
you take my phone from me? I’m a grown ass woman, Joe and—” Whatever else she planned to say was lost as I pulled her into a fierce kiss. She struggled for approximately three seconds and then she returned the kiss with equal passion. I finally decided to release her when I felt her tension melting and her body going limp. I guided her down to sit on the side of the bed as her knees buckled. She wore a confused and flustered expression.

“Baby girl,” My voice was soft but firm, “I’m a little freaked out right now, so I need you to hush up and hear what I’m sayin’. You’re my mate. You say you want me to be real with you, so here goes. Right now, you’re ignoring your most important responsibility, which is to taking care of our babies. I’m counting on you, Molly. I know you’re pissed, but I’m not apologizing. You’re wrong and I’m right. Now…when you’re ready to talk to me like ‘a grown ass women’, I’ll be on the couch.”

A look of fear flashed across her face before being replaced by a wary expression of apprehension. I turned and left the room.

I did exactly what I said I would, and when she didn’t immediately come out after me, I picked up her baby name book and started flipping through girls names. I got as far as the horrendous moniker Brandissa, when I heard the door creek open. Molly padded quietly into the room. She approached me slowly, like a little kid that knows they’re about to get a spanking.

“What do you want to talk about?” I hated the way she was looking at me, like she was waiting for me to strike her, or say something awful.

I sat forward and reached out for her, enfolding her in my arms. I looked up into her eyes. “Molly, I love you.”

She looked surprised, as if she expected me to say anything else. I pressed on, stunned that she still didn’t get it. “That’s something I’ve said to you a million times, but it still hasn’t penetrated that thick skull of yours.”

“You sure know how to sweet talk a girl.” She said it in a playful way but I saw fear welling in her eyes.

“Darlin’, I’m serious. It took a long time for me to understand that you actually think this is some sort of mercy date gone bad...That’s crap and it is long past time you accepted that we are meant to be together.” I waited, watching her face with unflinching courage. She tried to look away, but I gently cupped her face in my hands. When she finally spoke, her chin quivered and her voice trembled.

“Why do you want to be with me?” Her frank expression as she said it tore through me like drawer full of knives. Her unyielding eyes demanded an answer.

Refusing to back down, I blurted the truth as I saw it. “You’re everything I’ve ever wanted. I just didn’t know it until I saw you again.”

She seemed to search me for signs of dishonesty, and I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t hard to bear that type of silent interrogation from her after all we’d been through. I steeled myself, remembering what Dr. Greene had reminded me of on more than one occasion. I wasn’t the only one with demons that needed to be put to rest.

“But…is being with me making you better, or worse?” I went rigid; dismayed that she would even question this. “You’re the first guy I ever loved. I know you think that’s just silly bullshit, but it was a very big deal to me. It took me quite a while to even believe any of this was real.”

She paused, as if trying to formulate what she’d say next, or maybe how to put it delicately. “I know things have been hard…that I’m difficult. I guess I still have my guard up, but I promise I’m not trying to cause problems between us. The truth is that I feel like you’ve been backed into a corner. You’re stuck with me now, and I hate that. You aren’t making me feel that way, but it’s how I feel nevertheless. If we keep pushing things and just end up hating each other, I don’t think I could—”

“Molly.” I interrupted. She looked at the floor again, and I waited for her to meet my eyes. When she didn’t, I pulled her onto my lap. A tiny gasp escaped her, and she seemed to be bracing for something, practically sick with apprehension. I smiled reassuringly. “I wish you could see yourself through my eyes. How damn beautiful you are both inside and out. That sad excuse for a life I’d scraped together before us wasn’t living. Then one day you were there...and…damn, I just can’t explain it. Hell, I can’t even understand it myself sometimes. When you’re with me, it’s like being full of fire and light all at the same time.”

I could see tears standing in her eyes, but she managed not to cry. Finally she nodded slowly.

“I just don’t know what to do with that.” She said, clearing her throat nervously. “I’ve never had someone treat me like you have.”

“Molly.” I said, and placed a delicate kiss on her lips. I looked into her tenacious eyes, and watched the courageous girl she’d once been struggling for control.

“I need to tell you some things…so you understand why I’m so messed up.” She stated with a slow resigned exhale.

“I don’t think you’re messed up, Molly—” She shook her head and interrupted me.

“I
am
messed up.” The detached way she stated it made my stomach knot. She moved off of my lap and onto the couch next to me, stroking her belly in a calming manner. “It’s important for you to understand what the word marriage means to me. What it represents. I need you to get me, because if you do we have a fighting chance.”

For the next couple of hours, I listened to her talk about her short and tumultuous marriage. There were times I wanted to tell her to stop…that I couldn’t listen to anymore. The thought of this loving, generous girl in the situations she described made my head pound and my blood boil.

She didn’t cry, she didn’t raise her voice. As she talked, she looked mildly uncomfortable at times, and a little embarrassed. Her lack of response to her own hair-raising stories was almost more disturbing than the stories themselves. She started all the way back at her disastrous wedding night and described Draven’s greatest hits, which escalated to him nearly drowning her. She confided that even after she left him, she hadn’t felt comfortable taking a bath until she moved in with me. I allowed myself to see this confession as a small victory, but it was clear that we had a lot of damage to repair and huge obstacles to overcome.

When she finally fell silent, I reached for her and pulled her against me. What that monster had done to her made me wish…I put the anger out of my mind and concentrated on Molly. Gently stroking her hair, I breathed her in. “I’d given anything to go back and erase all of that.”

“I wish you could, too.” She murmured, nuzzling my neck. “Sometimes I feel like I used up all of my energy on him. Like he took the best of what I had to give. I wish I could have given that to you instead. I’m not sure what’s left.”

“Whatever you have, I want it. You deserved better, baby girl… and you deserve a lot better than a broken down wreck like me. But I promise I’ll give you everything I’ve got.”

“I really love you, Joe. With all my heart, I swear it.” She replied, but she didn’t look in my direction. She was staring at her hands which rested on her stomach. “I’m so sorry for the way things have played out between you and me. I’m sorry we didn’t plan this pregnancy a couple of years down the line. I’m sorry that you didn’t meet someone simpler, who’s more equipped to ease your mind instead of being a pain in your ass. If I were a less selfish person, I’d have stayed away and let you find a girl like that. But I’m not…”

We sat in silence for several minutes and I held her close, waiting for the rapid beats of her pulse under my hand to slow.