MIRACLE ON KAIMOTU ISLAND/ALWAYS THE HERO (28 page)

‘But you and Nathan are friends again now?’

‘Yes. I’m going to his birthday party next week. We’re going to
sleep
in the tree house.’

‘I’m not sure about that, hon.’ Abby touched Jack’s head. ‘You’ll have the party in the tree house but you might have to sleep in the real house.’

‘Why?’

‘Well, what if you needed to go to the toilet in the middle of the night? You might forget where you are and fall down the ladder.’

‘I wouldn’t forget, Mummy. That’s silly. I’d remember cos I’d be there and I’d
see
the ladder.’

‘You might be really sleepy and think you were dreaming.’

Tom could easily think
he
was dreaming right now. He could feel Jack’s small hand on his knee as the little boy edged closer. With Abby’s fingers still resting on that silky, dark head, they were all connected.

A...family?

‘Can I call you “Dad”?’

The need to know the reason why Tom had been absent in his life up till now seemed to have been forgotten. Or maybe it had simply been deemed unimportant.

Tom tried to smile but his lips wouldn’t quite cooperate. ‘If that’s okay with Mummy, it’s fine with me.’

He had to close his eyes for a heartbeat because that stupid word made him wince. Fine? Tom had no idea what it was going to be like having someone call him ‘Dad’, but he did know it was far too huge to be encompassed by that little word.

He could still feel the touch of Jack’s hand on his knee as he crouched here on the floor of Abby’s living room. He could feel the connection right through to Abby and he knew that she still had her hand on his head. The feeling of connection strengthened as he heard her soft words.

‘It’s who you are, Tom. Of course it’s okay with me.’

Tom opened his eyes to find Jack staring at him. Then the small boy twisted his neck to look up at his mother.

‘Are you and Dad friends again now? Like me and Nathan?’

The tiny silence seemed huge. Filled with how easily the title of fatherhood had fallen from Jack’s lips. His acceptance had been instant. Unquestioned. But how was Abby feeling? Tom could feel the thump of his heart as he waited for Abby to answer.

‘Yes.’ Abby’s gaze shifted from Jack to Tom. ‘I think so.’

Her eyes were dark enough to show strong feelings. As strong as what was stealing
his
breath away? Did she think that there was a possibility of more than friendship?

Did she
want
that?

‘I think so, too,’ Tom said, amazed at how calm he sounded. At the smile he managed, while still holding Abby’s gaze. She was the one to break the connection, first looking away from Tom and then ruffling Jack’s hair before lifting her hand.

And then she turned away.

* * *

She had to find something to do with her hands. Something that didn’t require any brain power because whatever she had between her ears had turned into some kind of mush. Just as well, the dinner dishes were still piled up on the kitchen bench and it was only a step or two away. Behind her, she could sense Tom getting to his feet. She could hear Jack bouncing.

‘Come and see
my
room. I’ve got books and trucks and...and a helicopter just like yours...’

The voices faded and Abby was left trying to find something solid in the mush of her thoughts.

Hearing her son call Tom ‘Dad’ like that. As though a missing piece of his life had simply been slotted into where it belonged.

As if they were a real family.

The way Tom had looked at her when she’d said that she thought they were friends again. As if there was something much, much bigger than friendship on offer.

Just the sheer, overwhelming presence of him in her home hunched down like that, with those faded jeans emphasising the muscles in his thighs and that soft, old T-shirt clinging to the equally impressive outline of his shoulders and chest. He could have remained standing and commanded a physical control of this space with no effort at all. He could have taken emotional control, too, and simply told Jack what he needed to be told.

But he hadn’t. He’d handed that control to her and his eyes had told her that whatever
she
wanted was okay. He would back her up if she wasn’t ready for this. It had been
her
call.

And it had been easy to know what to say. Even when her approval had been sought about whether it was all right for Jack to call him ‘Dad’.

Dad. Daddy. The word held such power because it took Abby straight back to her own childhood. To when she’d had a ‘real’ family and life had seemed perfect. And even after so many years, the pain of missing her parents could sneak up and hit her like a sledgehammer and bring tears to her eyes. A painful lump to her throat.

On top of feeling like, somehow, a real family had been born again just now. When she’d been looking down at Tom, keeping her hand on Jack’s head as if that would somehow steady her and remind her that he was hers and always would be. When she’d probably seen too much in that dark gaze of Tom’s.

He was here for his son, not to be with his son’s mother. Somehow, she had to remember that.

With the last of the pots on the draining-board, Abby wiped her hands on a tea towel and straightened her back, then walked out of the kitchen.

‘Jack? It’s time to get your pyjamas on and clean your teeth, ready for bed.’ She poked her head through the doorway. ‘It’s a school day tomorrow.’

Oh, help. Tom was sitting on the end of Jack’s bed. Half lying, in fact, propped up on one elbow. Jack was lying on his stomach and their heads were almost touching, bent over the glossy pictures of a book about dinosaurs. They both looked up at the same time and if her heart had been wrenched any more, it would have torn into little pieces.

They were
so
alike.

And she loved them.
Both
of them.

If she didn’t get some protective barriers up there was no way she was going to cope with having Tom here, getting to know his son.

Keep busy,
she ordered herself. Focus on Jack. On work. On the house. Whatever it takes. In a couple of weeks, Tom would be going back to his own life. To the career that meant more to him than anything or anyone else. She had to keep her distance because there was no way she could stand the heartbreak of losing him for a second time.

‘I’ll find some bedding,’ she added, turning away, ‘and make up the couch for you, Tom. You’ve probably got an early start tomorrow.’

* * *

How could time be passing so fast?

The days were full-on, with early starts and late finishes. The bonus of volunteer labour was being well used and Tom was happy to be in the thick of it. There were roofs to be patched and made weatherproof after chimneys had fallen, and mounds of bricks and rubble to get shifted. Damaged septic tanks were being replaced and there was a lot of digging that had to be done by hand in awkward places.

Hefty framing was going up around heritage buildings that could be saved but which needed to be protected from further aftershocks in the meantime.

Many of the people Tom was working with were also volunteers from the mainland. He even knew a few of them, including a trio of firemen from Auckland that he’d met at more than one major accident scene. He didn’t join them for a few beers after the manual labour was finished for the day, though. While he was enjoying being part of the recovery process, it hadn’t been the primary reason for this visit to Kaimotu Island.

The other volunteers had no idea of the real reason he’d come back so soon but there were a lot of locals in and around the working parties and it only took a day or two before Tom realised he was getting some significant looks along with friendly slaps on the back here and there that other volunteers didn’t seem to be given.

How could he have forgotten how small communities worked? He might have stayed in blissful ignorance a little longer, too, except that a Jeep slowed and then stopped just in front of him on a morning when he was headed into a site on the main street. A route that Ben McMahon was taking to get up the hill to the hospital.

Ben got out of the Jeep and leaned on the door as he waited for Tom to catch up. ‘Hey, Tom... Haven’t seen you for a few days and I’ve been wanting to say hi. How’s it going?’

‘Great. I think we’re beginning to see a bit of progress. Still a lot to be done, of course.’

‘It’s people like you that are going to make it happen faster. We’re all very grateful.’

Tom shrugged off the praise. ‘How’s it going up at the hospital? I heard you’ve had to evacuate a ward after they found some cracks.’

‘Safety precaution. It’s probably only cosmetic but there’s a team of engineers coming to give it a thorough inspection today.’

‘Abby says you’re pretty stretched for manpower still. It’s great news that Ginny’s going to come on board.’

Ben’s grin lit up his face. ‘Sure is. I’m the luckiest man alive.’

Tom grinned back. Everybody knew that there was a wedding in the near future for Ben and Ginny. That Button was going to have a real family. An amazing family, from what Tom had been hearing. The kind that cemented communities like this together in the best possible way. Ben’s parents were astonishing in their capacity to care for so many people. It was always a highlight of Jack’s day when he got to go to the McMahon homestead after school to be looked after by Hannah.

He was wearing Abby down at the moment, begging for one of the kittens that Ailsa was caring for. Button had a black one with a white nose, apparently. Jack wanted the one that had odd black and white splotches all over it. He had already named it Checkers.

‘And I’m not the only one with great news,’ Ben added. ‘I think Jack’s the happiest little boy alive right now.’

‘He’s got the kitten?’

‘What? No, I don’t know anything about a kitten. I’m talking about him not only having a dad but having one that everybody knows is a real hero.’

‘Ohh...’ Tom was embarrassed. ‘He told you?’

‘Actually, it was Button who told us, but I think he’s told everybody else. It was news at school the day after you got here.’

Tom’s embarrassment deepened. This was pretty personal stuff to have broadcast. And what would people think? That he hadn’t wanted to have anything to do with his son until now?

‘I didn’t know,’ he said quietly. ‘I probably never would have known if the earthquake hadn’t brought me here.’

Ben nodded. ‘Abby made that very clear. That she hadn’t told you she was pregnant. That it wasn’t your fault.’

Tom winced. ‘I wouldn’t go quite that far. It was my fault that the relationship didn’t work out.’

There was a genuine sympathy in Ben’s gaze and his eyebrows had an encouraging lift but he didn’t say anything. Maybe his own current state of bliss made him want things to work out for everybody. And he knew Abby, didn’t he? He had to know what an amazing person she was. But he didn’t know
him
that well and they were blokes, for heaven’s sake. Neither of them would be remotely comfortable getting onto emotional territory. Besides, they both had important jobs to get on with.

‘I’m working on that.’ Tom managed a grin.

Ben’s face lit up again and Tom got another one of those friendly back slaps. ‘Good luck. And consider yourself invited to the wedding, if you can make it.’

* * *

‘The reception’s going to be a beach party,’ Abby told Tom later that night, when he mentioned meeting Ben and getting an invitation to the wedding. ‘And I’ve had a sneak preview of what the wedding dress is going to be like. Ginny will look stunning.’

‘I’m sure she will.’ Tom’s smile looked a bit strained and Abby wasn’t surprised. Men like Tom weren’t into the whole marriage thing, were they? It was the kind of anchor that heroes functioned better without.

Hmm. Awkward. And Jack wasn’t even around to defuse this sudden atmosphere by launching yet another campaign that would result in him getting his own kitten. That morning’s attempt had been a portrait of Checkers that was now held in place by magnets on the front of the fridge. He wouldn’t be bursting into the room any time soon, either, because this was the sleep-over night for Nathan’s birthday party.

It was, in fact, the first night that Abby and Tom had been alone together in the cottage.

Oh...help. Awkwardness had just gained an edge of real tension.

As if she wasn’t totally aware of Tom all the time, anyway. Having him sitting to eat with them at the table or crowding the small kitchen to wash up afterwards. Seeing him come out of the bathroom after a shower with his hair in spikes and his chest still bare, or, worse, when he passed close enough for her to smell the clean dampness of his skin. To feel its heat.

Having Jack always there had made it easy to fight the awareness. And the desire that licked at its heels. Until it was safe to go there when she was in her own bed, wrapped in the privacy of darkness.

How was she going to distract herself now? Keep herself safe?

The meal was over. The dishes were done. The little house was very quiet without Jack. Abby could hear the wash of the nearby waves and the forlorn cry of a seagull.

She could wash her coffee mug, at least. Pushing her chair back, Abby got to her feet. ‘It’ll be a real island do,’ she said a little too brightly. ‘Something happy everybody can look forward to. You should come...’ Oh, Lord, why had she said that? ‘I guess you won’t still be here, though...’

Tom had got to his feet, as well. He was following her with his own empty mug. ‘Would you like me to still be here, Abby?’

‘I...’ Abby shook off a wave of longing. Her next words came out more harshly than she’d intended. ‘What’s the point in even asking, Tom? There’s nothing here for
you
.’

Tom’s mug went down onto the bench with a loud thud. ‘What’s that supposed to mean? Do you think the fact that I’ve got a son means
nothing
to me? That
you
mean
nothing
?’

‘N-no...’ Abby gulped. She meant something to him? What, exactly? ‘I was talking about your career. What’s most important to you. You couldn’t live here.’