Midnight Ballerina (37 page)

“ARE YOU SURE you don’t want to head back to your family’s for a bit?” Miller asked me again, my last day of school for the semester finally being completed. I was in the office, dancing around as I filed invoices with my shoes kicked off and a sense of relief at school being over. I was looking forward to summer.

“No, Miller. I told you maybe I’ll go to visit in about a month or so but I need to plan it out. Are you trying to get rid of me or something?” I shoved a folder into his chest and he grabbed onto my hand to pull me against him, a heated look in his eyes.

“Of course not. I just don’t want you to feel obligated to stick around because of me. Whenever you want time off, take it.”

“I don’t feel obligated. I
want
to be here with you.” I felt his body relax and I knew that I had calmed his mind down a little. I think he was constantly worrying about the state of our relationship, like I would just up and leave him one day and never come back. I knew those abandonment issues had a possibility of coming into play. Luckily, they didn’t seem to affect us that much, most of the time, but sometimes I could see that it was a bit of a struggle for him just to let go and trust me.

My cell phone rang from my desk and I kissed Miller on the cheek before I went over to see who it was, mentally groaning when I saw Carter’s name flash across the screen. He’d already called me twice since I got here this afternoon. Carter tended to be one of the issues that Miller had. He never really said anything to me about our friendship, but I knew he wasn’t a fan of Carter’s. I guess I could see why. I really wouldn’t want Miller talking to one of his ex-girlfriends all the time either, but Carter and I had known each other for years.

I hit the silence button on the side of my phone and turned back to Miller, who was now standing in the doorway of his office, one hand above his head, causing his shirt to rise up slightly and give me just a glimpse of that sprinkling of hair above the waistband of his boxer briefs that led to a very happy place.

He crooked a finger at me and I took a step forward. “Did you need something, Mr. Buchanan?”

He shot me a sexy smirk. “Wouldn’t you like to know? How ‘bout you step into my office and I’ll let you know what I need.”

My stomach flip flopped and I loved the feeling. Sure, we hadn’t been dating
that
long, but I was worried that things might get stale over time, especially when we moved in together, but they didn’t and I doubted they ever would. It made me wonder why I had been so against being in a relationship, but maybe that’s not what it had even been.

Maybe I’d just been waiting for Miller to come along.

I walked into his office and he quickly shut the door behind me, locking it before pushing me against it. “I thought you had somewhere to be, Mr. Buchanan. And I have a
ton
of work to do,” I emphasized and he snorted.

“Good thing I’m the boss. You’re working in my office for the rest of the day.”

“Oh, really?” My eyebrows shot up and my legs clenched together at the thought of what kind of
work
we would be doing. It had been a while since we’d been able to get any
work
done in his office.

“Yes, really,” he whispered hoarsely in my ear before he spun me around and had me spread out across his desk. Luckily, the thing was cleaned off or it would be really uncomfortable. His hand crept underneath my skirt, and I was so thankful that I had dressed for easy access because I needed him immediately. His mouth closed over mine at the exact same time his fingers brushed across my panties, and I sighed into his mouth. But then he pulled away all too soon and I started to get frustrated, wanting his mouth on mine, until he flipped my body over and whispered, “I want to take you from behind,” into my ear and my whole body shook in agreement.

He kissed down my back as he slid my panties down and off, bunched my skirt around my waist, and then his hand went back to work between my legs, rubbing agonizingly slow circles then switching to hard, and then back to slow. The warmth continued to grow in my body and I was so close but I wanted him inside of me. “Miller,” I whimpered, arching my hips back against him, but he moved away an inch.

“You’ll get that soon enough, but for now, just let go.” He ran his nose across my shoulder, and I leaned my head back into his chest, squeezing my eyes tightly shut and just let myself enjoy him pumping his fingers in and out of me.

“Come for me,” he demanded and I happily obliged, and I came hard, rocking my whole body. Miller didn’t even wait before I was totally down from my high, making quick work of his pants and boxers, before pressing on my lower back and entering me from behind in one quick thrust. He gripped my hips firmly, groaning once he had himself pushed completely in. “I love being inside of you,” he murmured against my hair before he picked up the pace and I arched back into him, trying to keep up, but mainly hanging on for one hell of a ride as my body slid back and forth across the top of his desk. I could tell he was getting close as we panted together, and I was already close again. He must have sensed it too because one hand slipped away from my waist and moved back between my legs. “I want you to come on my dick. Come with me, baby.” He swiveled his hips slightly, slamming us both forward, and I moaned his name loudly, just as his whole body shuddered and I felt him spiraling out of control, right at the same moment I did, and he collapsed against my back, our breathing slowly returning to a steady rhythm. “I think it’s time for an evaluation. You’re in definite need of a raise.”

I laughed as he all too soon peeled his body away from mine, helping me up, and I headed toward the bathroom that was attached to his office to get cleaned up. When I came out, he smiled in my direction but I noticed he was on the phone so I went back to my own desk to do the actual work that I was paid to do. I noticed that I had yet another missed call from Carter and a few from a number I didn’t recognize, so I decided to call Carter back first.

“Monroe, what the hell? I’ve been trying to get a hold of you all damn day,” he said before I could even get a hello out.

“Sorry, I’ve been—”

“Doesn’t matter,” he cut me off. “You need to get home. Now.”

“What? Why?” I began to panic, his tone was demanding but there was something else there that I couldn’t quite put my finger on. It definitely wasn’t the normal Carter.

“Monroe,” he bit out. “Don’t freak out, but it’s your dad. He’s in the hospital. Your mom wanted me to get you home. She’s there with him now.”

“What?” I dropped down into my seat, my legs giving out on me as my head tried to wrap around the fact that something was wrong with my dad. He was a rock, nothing ever got him down, ever. “What do you mean? What happened? Is he all right?”

“I don’t know if he’s going to be all right, Roe. Something happened while he was at work, they’re guessing it was a heart attack. Your mom called me and I told her I would get you home.”

“Okay, I’m coming. Right now. I’ll call you when I figure out what time I’m landing.” I stood up, grabbing my purse and running to Miller’s office, only to see him on the phone still. He held up one finger to me, his face twisted with confusion, probably from seeing the expression on my face. I could tell he was trying to get off the phone with whoever he was talking to, but the person on the other end just kept blabbing on and on. I shook my head, mouthing “I have to go,” and turned in the opposite direction.

I couldn’t wait, I had to leave now.

I wasn’t going to waste any time that could be spent with my dad. Something else could happen to him and I would regret it for the rest of my life. It was already going to be bad enough having to sit on the airplane, wondering, and who knew how quickly I would be able to find a flight. I needed to be there for my dad.

I BREATHED A sigh of relief as soon as I stepped into the hospital room and was able to grab onto my dad’s hand, squeezing it tightly, and know that he was still here. He wasn’t looking the greatest. The man lying in that hospital bed didn’t resemble my strong but serious dad in the slightest; he looked frail and almost childlike.

“Monroe, I’m so glad you’re here, sweetheart,” my mom said quietly, wrapping an arm around my shoulder and kissing the side of my head. “I just can’t believe—” Her voice broke and she moved to cover her mouth with her hand, muffling the sobs that were trying to escape.

“It’s going to be okay, Mom. He’s going to be fine.” I patted her on the back before wiping away my own tears that had remained silent. “He’s going to be just fine,” I repeated.

“You’re always the one I can count on, Roe.” She sat down in a chair that was pulled up closely to my dad’s bedside and grabbed onto his other hand.

“Where are Holland and Jackson?”

“The cafeteria, I think. I haven’t seen them in a while. They said they can’t handle seeing him like this, so they’ve been trying to keep themselves busy.”

“Those two need to grow the hell up,” I bit out. “They should be here supporting you.”

“It’s okay, Monroe. I’m just glad you’re here.”

“It’s not okay,” I muttered but I tried to let it go for now. For now, I was just going to have to be the rock for my mom and dad because someone had to be.

Over the next few days, I did just that. My mom was a mess most of the time, even though she tried to hold herself together, it was almost impossible. Her and my dad were going on almost thirty years of marriage, so I could see why. Holland and Jackson held true to form, not being there when they should have been. I just didn’t understand it and their attitudes frustrated the hell out of me. My parents had always been there for them for everything; it was their turn to be there.

“How’s your dad doing today?” Miller asked and I snapped my attention back to him, pressing the phone to my ear.

“He’s all right, seems like he’s getting a little bit of strength back, but not much.”

“I still can’t believe you just up and left, Monroe. I would’ve gone with you.”

“Miller.” I sighed and grabbed my snacks out of the vending machine before sitting down in the waiting room so I didn’t wake my dad up. “I know, but you’re super busy right now and I didn’t want you to have to rearrange your schedule.”

“You’re so damn stubborn, Monroe. Next time, let me worry about that shit, all right?”

“Mmhmm,” I muttered, taking a bite out of my candy bar. I really missed regular food but I refused to leave the hospital, let alone the floor that my dad was on.

“So how long do you plan on staying up there? You know you can take off as much time as you need.”

“I know. I’ve already talked to Nina and she said the same thing. I’m not sure yet. Once my dad does get to go home it’ll be a while until he’s back on his feet and they can’t survive without my mom working so she won’t be home to take care of him. And I couldn’t even think of Jackson taking care of him, even though he doesn’t do a thing during the day. So, I don’t know how long I’m going to be here. Sorry.”

“Hey, don’t be sorry,” he said softly and it made me wish he were here right now so I could just let myself get lost in his arms for a little while. “Make sure you’re taking care of yourself, too. I miss you.”

“I miss you too. Oh, and thanks for the flowers, they smell so good.” The thought of them made me smile. Two vases had been delivered to my dad’s room, one for him and one for me, only mine had a special note. “And I love you too.”

He made some sort of noise that I knew acknowledged that he at least heard me even though he still couldn’t say it. I was okay with the little ways that he showed me that he loved me, but I hoped that one day maybe I would actually hear them.

“Carter been around?” he asked, finally breaking the silence. I could hear the tenseness in his voice just from mentioning Carter’s name, and I hated that he couldn’t trust me to be around Carter. I could understand why though.

“Yeah, he’s been here,” I responded vaguely. No way in hell was I going to tell him he was sitting in my dad’s room right now, waiting for me to come back. Carter had been trying to convince me all morning to let him take me back to my parents’ house so I could at least shower and grab a nap in a comfortable bed, but I refused. With the way my eyes were fighting me, though, I might just have to take him up on that offer.