Matilda Wren (4 page)

She had a single bedroom, due to her age. There were eight of them in the home, aged between four and eighteen.

Some children were there for a short time, while others stayed longer.

She moved around a lot but had been at this one for about three months, which was a record. Normally she only lasted a few weeks before she was moved on somewhere else.

In between homes she would be placed with temporary foster parents but they never lasted very long either.

She was just about to be given her freedom. She had been in care all her life and knew the system well. She had just turned eighteen, social services were going to set her up in a nice little flat and she would start college.

She would never have to deal with foster parents or social workers again. She would be completely independent and have nobody else to answer to. Life was looking good for Ginnie; she had a new boyfriend and was enjoying life for once. Although, considering how late he was in meeting her, she was beginning to doubt her current status.

Her slim, scantily dressed, body shivered in the night air and she jumped up and down in a bid to warm up. Finally, seeing Sean’s car turn round the corner and pull up to her, she loosened the tense stance that had taken hold of her as every minute he was late ticked by. He leant over, opening the passenger car door and she jumped in. The relief swept through her that she hadn’t been stood up.

She had only been seeing him for a week and the longer she was waiting, the more paranoia set in. She took one look at his face and her smile dropped away. He looked really pissed off. Something told her she should be quiet and not antagonise him further. She decided not to say anything about him being late. She just reached for her seatbelt and strapped herself in.

Sean though, had other ideas. He grabbed her legs and shoved his hand between them. She felt his fingers, roughly trying to get inside her knickers. She tried to push him away but he was too strong.

“Don’t fight me!” He shouted at her, as he pushed his face into hers. “I am not in the mood tonight.”

His eyes flared wide open and Ginnie could see he was speeding out of his head. She stopped struggling, as he wanted and allowed herself to relax a little.

“What are you doing?” She heard how meek it sounded.

She suddenly looked very young and this excited Sean.

The anger he was feeling earlier was beginning to slowly subside. The two grams of coke he snorted, not ten minutes ago, was also helping. Now, this girl sitting in his car was going to help him further. He needed her to unleash the frustration of his day and he was determined to make that happen.

“…sshhh… just relax… you will enjoy it more if you keep still and relax.”

His fingers were still forcefully trying to get underneath her knickers. Ginnie was scared. She silently scolded herself for wearing the short denim skirt.

“Please… don’t… oh god… please” She whimpered. She knew she couldn’t fight him. He was huge, compared to her small size 8 frame.

What had happened to make him behave like this? He was certainly not the guy that had charmed her a few days ago. That guy had taken her out for a proper dinner, in a proper restaurant. He had ordered a bottle of wine and poured it into a wine glass for her. He treated her like an adult. He made her feel special and exclusive. He had walked her home and held her hand. He had been nothing but respectful. They hadn’t even kissed.

She had fought off young boys her age, with their fumbling advances towards her, but nothing to this degree.

Normally, she only had to push them away but that wasn’t going to work here. Sean wasn’t a teenage boy. He was a man, who obviously had needs and she was going to fulfil them, even if she didn’t want to.

He was also on something because his eyes were rolling about in the back of his head. Ginnie instinctively knew that she wouldn’t be able to reason with him. She screamed out loud when four of his fingers found their way inside her. She had never felt anything like it.

It was a fierce, sheering burn, deep between her legs. As he forcefully penetrated her, she felt a warm trickle of fluid run down her legs. She thought she had wet herself. She was scared enough to do so. Sean had felt it too because it caused him to stop and look at his hands.

She was bleeding. He knew he had been a bit rough but surely he hadn’t been that rough. Had he? Then he realised.

He smiled and stroked her face.

“You’re a virgin?” His voice was husky.

Ginnie nodded while a tear rolled down her cheek.

Before she knew what was happening, Sean had lay the seat back and was on top of her. He tore off her knickers and ripped open the flimsy blouse she was wearing. He pulled her bra above her breasts and grabbed at her nipples with his teeth.

He brutally bit and sucked at them, ignoring her screams and pleas of wanting to go home. She had never experienced anything like this before. Although she had spent most of her life in and out of care, she had been one of the rare lucky ones that had managed to survive relatively unscarred.

She had heard of and known other girls that had fallen prey to ‘the system’ and had been abused by their social workers or foster parents but it had never happened to her.

She now almost wished that it had. Then, maybe she would know how to handle this situation.

The pain was almost unbearable. How did people do this for fun? She wondered. Terror was mounting up by the second. She couldn’t understand why he was doing this to her. She had no idea that he was rushing from the exhilaration of half killing a man, just before picking her up.

She also had no idea that this would have happened sooner or later anyway, it just so happened to be tonight.

Sean was fascinated by her body. It suddenly occurred to him just how young she was. Her breasts were budding.

They sat pert and static. She felt different inside too he decided. She was tight and clenched. It was different to the other women he had shagged, especially the working girls.

This one was a rarity. You didn’t often come across them untouched. They were all slags in the end though.

They all ended up on their backs, with their legs open, beckoning him. He had a strange power over women. Some, like Ginnie, did it out of fear; some because they found him dangerous and exciting; others did it because they wanted their next fix.

As he shoved himself into her and begun to ride her, she looked out of the car window; she could see her children’s home. All the lights were still on. They would all be gathered in the large lounge, watching TV or playing on the PS2, all unaware of what was happening to her outside.

She thought she had found a lovely new boyfriend; she had in fact, attracted a complete nutter. She tried to think of something, anything to stop her brain from registering what was happening. He was raping her. Thousands of alarm bells were going off in her head; the ringing was so loud in her ears. The comprehension of the situation imploded her mind. It hurt. It really hurt. Her lower body was on fire.

When he had finished the torrid abuse, he rolled off from on top of her and lay beside her. Her body was exposed. He had taken off her skirt and bra and was gently tracing his finger around her breasts and down to her stomach. It was a very different touch to the one she had just encountered.

It was soft and tender, unlike the animal attack that had just occurred. One thing Ginnie knew she could definitely rely on was that Sean Fergus was very weird and that he flipped from Mr Nice to Mr Terrifying within seconds.

“Did you enjoy that?”

Not sure if he wanted an answer, Ginnie nodded her head slowly. She had not enjoyed it. In fact she was absolutely disgusted. She had had to physically stop herself from heaving when he came inside her. When he lay on top of her afterwards, suckling at her nipple, she had to stop herself from shrinking away from him.

The more she had begged him to stop, the more he had shoved himself into her. She wanted to run from the car as fast as she could but something told her that if she wanted to survive, she would have to ride this out and play the long game.

“I said you would.”

He purred in her ear. His fingers stroked the hair between her legs. “You were a virgin? No fucker had ever touched you?”

“No.” Ginnie said “Can I go home now… please?”

She tried to sound as polite and humble as she could. She sounded like a little girl. And she was. She was a frightened little girl, who was in way over her head.

She was ecstatic when he had turned his attentions to her. She had known of him, heard of his reputation and rather fancied some of the notoriety. She thought she was so lucky, when he started chatting to her in the park a few days ago.

He had singled her out and had been so sweet. He had known her name and that impressed her no end. But now she had changed her mind. She was terrified and he knew it. It suddenly occurred to Ginnie that he didn’t just know she was scared; he actually got off on it.

“Not yet.” He was smiling. He watched his hand stroke her hair. He slipped his finger down slightly further, to her clitoris and watched her face crumple up with revulsion.

He had had plans for this one. She was going to be one of his new girls.

She was young and the punters would like that. They would pay a fortune for her. She was slim and very pretty, which meant he could use her for his more prestigious clients, the judges and alike. But now he knew that she was a virgin, it changed things slightly.

He wanted her to himself for a while. She was untouched goods. He had been the only man that had been there and it made him feel invincible. It was actually the vast amount of cocaine that he had consumed that was giving him this invincible feeling but for now he was happy to believe in the myth that it was her.

He let his fingers play with her at their own free will.

He liked the control he had over her, the fear he had already instilled in her. Ginnie would do as she was told, he knew that. She was innocent and reminded him of someone he used to know and love and for a while he was going to pretend he had
her
back.

“I want you to be a very good little girl and do something for me.” He kissed her then; his tongue deep in the back of her throat. Ginnie couldn’t help but gag this time.

“I want to you to pretend to be someone.” He slipped a single finger inside her, much gentler than before. Then he whispered. “Rachel.”

* * *

Four days later, she found herself standing in a small bathroom, in a flat in Harold Wood, wondering what the hell was happening to her. The building itself was rat infested, with water leaking from pipes along the skirting boards.

Needles and burnt tin foil lay in the passages outside, the domineering smell of urine clung to every wall.

The bathroom was in no better state. The walls, that may have once been a creamy yellow, now bore a murky grey soot that layered everything. The toilet and sink sustained mass rust erosion and what was left of the white paint work was melting into an abyss of reddish brown.

The bath was filthy and covered in a black scum. She turned on the shower and it made a chugging noise that travelled along the pipes on the ceiling and down the walls, there was a gurgling before water spurted out the mouldy head.

She undressed and stepped into the bath. Every bone ached and throbbed. She looked down at her battered body.

Her legs were a mass of black and purple. He had hurt her pretty badly. She couldn’t do what he had wanted. How could she? She had never so much as kissed a boy with tongues, let alone done the things he had asked of her.

He had punished her when she couldn’t perform to his commands. Then he tortured and raped her, over and over. He had to carry her from the car to the flat because she couldn’t walk. He laid her on the bed and stroked her hair, while whispering soothing words into her ear, until she fell asleep.

He switched from nice to terrifying and back to nice so many times throughout the first night, but all the time he called her Rachel. It was only days later, when he helped her to the bathroom so she could shower, that he called her by her name.

As the warm water washed away the blood and semen that was stuck to her body, she wondered who Rachel was.

She hoped he never found her because the girl was in for a much worse time than she had suffered, Ginnie was sure of that. He loved and hated her so much; it was frightening to see how much it consumed him.

As much as he had let rip on her, Ginnie was also sure he had held back. He had known she wasn’t this Rachel girl but he needed to pretend she was. The more coke he snorted, the quicker the switches happened. It got to the point that Ginnie didn’t know which one he was going to be at any given second.

She had never felt so relieved as when he finally fell asleep and stopped pawing at her for a while, Although, even then, he still held her very close to him, in a vice like grip. Before he fell asleep each time, he told her that she was now his. He said he now owned her and if she tried to escape he would kill her and set fire to the children’s home, with everybody inside it.

This was enough to make sure that she did as she was told. She wasn’t particularly fond of the home but it had small children in there. They were innocent, but then so was she. He said that, if she was a good girl, then he would let her go when he had finished with her. She wasn’t entirely sure he meant it. She had a feeling this dingy flat would be the last place she ever saw.

She kept that thought to herself though and only allowed herself to think it once.