Mail Order Misfit (Brides of Beckham) (8 page)

Abel looked at Colin and shook his head.  "I like that.  This is what I'm going to do, but you may give your opinion about when I do it.  What happened to the good old days when women knew their place?"

Colin shrugged with a grin.  "Elaine is still acting like everything I say matters.  I give it another week or two before that stops."
  He ignored Elaine when she glared at him.

Abel sighed.  "Enjoy it while you can."

Rebekah looked at her husband.  "What day would be good?"  She wasn't going to listen to him complain about her disobedience by the look on her face.

"Wednesday?  And what am I going to do for lunch while you're out running around the countryside with your new friend?"

"I'll leave some soup on the stove for you."  Rebekah looked back at Elaine.  "I swear, you'd think he would starve to death if I wasn't there to feed him every few hours."

Elaine put her hand over her mouth to try to conceal her giggles.  She loved the way the other couple interacted with each other.  "Will you come around noon?" she asked, wanting to have everything ready.

"That sounds good, and you can plan on us staying for a few hours.  I'll put Leah down to nap there, and we'll just spend some time getting to know each other."

Elaine nodded happily.  "I'd love that."  Mentally she was going over all the things she wanted to have done before her friend arrived.  She wanted to have the curtains on the windows and the tablecloth finished, and some nice fall flowers if she could find some.  She would have to ask Colin if he knew where any were.

Rebekah held up a hand in a wave as she walked toward the door.  "I'll see you on Wednesday then.  My mother has us over for lunch every Sunday after church.  It's nice not to have to cook one afternoon a week."

"Two this week," Elaine reminded her.

"That's right.  Two whole days where I only cook two meals per day.  I hope I don't get spoiled and forget how to work," she joked as she walked toward the door at the back of the church.

Elaine looked at Colin.  "What will you do for lunch on Wednesday?  Should I pack you a sandwich to take with you?"
  She was more than willing to do whatever he needed.

"Are you saying I'm not allowed to eat lunch with you and your friend?  Are you embarrassed of me or something?"  He gave her a mock frown.

She laughed.  "You know that's not true.  I just don't think you'll enjoy listening to us talk about women's things."  And honestly, she wanted time alone with her new friend. 

She started to bend over to get her cane, but he got it for her.  "There's no need for you to ever bend when I'm here. 
It's my job to take care of you."

Elaine thanked him, accepting the cane from him.  Her leg was tired, but it was not terribly painful. She took the arm he offered and walked with him out to the wagon, stopping to talk to the pastor at the door.  "Thank you for your sermon today.  I really enjoyed it," she said.

Pastor Samuels smiled.  "We're happy to have you as part of our congregation."

"I'm very happy to be here."  She squeezed Colin's arm a bit tighter as she said the words.  She couldn't believe just how quickly she'd gotten used to having him around and started relying on him so strongly.

After he helped her into the wagon and climbed up himself, Colin turned to her.  "So how was our church compared to your church at home?" he asked.

She shrugged.  "It was the same but different."  She laughed at herself for a moment.  "The service was pretty much exactly the same, but at home, I always had to sit between my parents, because my mother was certain if I didn't someone would bump into me and hurt me."  She tried to think of the right way to say what was on her mind.  "I guess the biggest difference is that here I was allowed to be an adult, but at home I was always forced to be a child, no matter if I felt like one or not."

"So is it better to go to church as a child or as an adult?"

"I'll take doing anything as
your
wife over doing it as a child any day of the week."  She emphasized the word 'your' so he would understand that being another man's wife wouldn't hold the same appeal.

"I'm glad."  He kissed the top of her head as he left the churchyard and headed toward the house.  "I gave your letters to Mr. Judd, and he promised to get them mailed off first thing tomorrow."

She smiled.  "Thank you."  She looked down at her hands for a moment.  "I didn't tell my parents what happened when I arrived.  I had never told them John's last name, so I just kept referring to you as 'my husband' in the letter.  I hope you don't mind."

He thought about that for a moment as he navigated the busy roads.  "Well, did you not tell them because you were afraid they'd worry about you, or because you think you made a bad decision by marrying me?"

"How can you even ask that?  Of course, I was afraid they'd worry.  My mother would be on the next train out here if she found out I'd married 'the wrong man.'"  She hated the idea of her mother coming there and disturbing her new marriage.  She knew eventually she'd see her again, but she wanted to be a great deal more confident in herself first.

"Did you marry the wrong man?" he asked.  For some reason, Colin had been worried that she regretted the decision to marry him and not go back home. 
He wasn't sure why, but the way she'd acted that morning when he'd talked about how glad he was to have her for his wife had bothered him a great deal.

"No, I didn't.  But my mother wouldn't see it that way.  My father would be proud that I figured out how to make things work without them, but Mother would be crying and begging me to go back home."  She frowned.  "I'm not going back."
  She couldn't even think about going back without wanting to cry.  She hadn't realized how truly lonely and isolated she'd been until she'd arrived in Kansas.

He put his arm around her, hugging her to him.  "No, you're not.  You're mine now, and I'm keeping you."

She smiled, liking his possessive tone.  "You don't have a choice unless you plan on kicking me out into the snow." 

"It's October.  There's no snow yet."

"I guess you're forced to keep me then, aren't you?"

He laughed.  "I guess I can make it through."  He stopped beside the Missouri river that ran just north of town and not too far north of the ranch, which was already north of town.  "I love just sitting here watching the river."

She smiled.  "I loved to go to the beach back home.  I could sit and watch the ocean for hours." 

"You won't be able to do that here.  Does that bother you?"
  He hated that some of her favorite things wouldn't be possible in Kansas.

She shook her head.  "I haven't gone for years.  Not since before I hurt myself."  She stared out at the water, feeling its calming influence wash over her. "I feel like my whole life ended that day, and I've been waiting for years for it to start again.  I know that sounds silly, but I've been fighting to be me again for twelve years."

"Well, then I guess I'm the luckiest man alive.  I get to be the one to be there as you start to live again."

She smiled as he started the wagon, so happy to have him beside her on the drive home.  He really was a special man who looked at things in a different way than anyone she'd ever met.  She needed him just as much as she'd ever needed anything.

Chapter Five

They spent the day together, because he didn't work on Sundays.  "When I was growing up, my father said that the Lord's day was for resting, and we were never allowed to work at all.  The only work that was ever done was cooking and milking, but only because milking had to be done.  Even when it was harvest time, we took all day off every single Sunday."

"My family wasn't as strict about it," Elaine said as she carefully hemmed the curtains.  She really wanted to have them up and ready to go before Rebekah and Leah came to lunch Wednesday.  "Father never worked, but he had no problem if work was done around the house.  Does it bother you if I sew?"  She didn't think sewing should be a problem, but she didn't want to upset him in any way.

"Oh, not at all.  I just won't work on Sunday other than gathering eggs and milking the cows.  I wanted to explain why.  It always makes me feel a little lazy to take a whole day off every week.
"  He grinned at her playfully as he sat with a book in his lap.

She smiled.  "I think everyone should take a day off.  It's good for us to have a time of rest." She nodded down at the curtains.  "I actually enjoy sewing, and I want this done before Wednesday.  I can't stand to sit with idle hands."
  Her mother had drilled into her from a young age that you use what time you have to make things better.  She couldn't count the number of pillows she'd embroidered over the years.

"When you're used
to working, idle hands make you feel a bit crazy."  He watched her as she sewed, wondering if she remembered their bargain, and realized tonight was the night for them to consummate the marriage. He hoped so, because he didn't want to have to try to convince her it was all right.  She acted as if everything were normal, though, so he worried she'd forgotten.  He'd been counting down the hours until bedtime, while she acted as if it were just another day.

After supper, he went out to milk the cows and collect the eggs.  He hoped she'd take the hint and get ready for bed early, because he was tired of waiting.  When he stepped back into the house and put the milk and the eggs on the work table, she wasn't waiting for him in the main room as she usually was.  He smiled a bit in relief, knowing he'd find her in the bedroom.

He walked into their room and found her, already in her nightgown waiting in bed for him.  He blew out the lantern and undressed quickly, sliding beneath the covers with her.  Lying on his side, he pulled her to him, noting that she'd left her hair down for the first time that night.  Normally, she put it in a long braid down her back at night.

He stroked her cheek, his hand going under her hair in the back and pulling her head toward him.  He brushed his lips against hers, gently and sweetly, before smoothing her hair away from her face.  "I love your hair," he told her.  "Thank you for wearing it down for me."

"I thought you'd prefer it tonight."  She knew he liked her hair with all the times he'd touched it.

"I'd prefer it if you wore it down all the time, but I know that's not practical."

She shook her head.  "If I wore my hair down all the time, it would end up in everything we eat.  It would always be in the way."  She kissed his chin.  "But I don't mind wearing it down in bed at night if that's what you'd like me to do." 

"I'd love that," he told her.  "Please do."
  Her hair was incredibly provocative to him, and all he could think about was how it would feel against his bare skin.

His lips toyed with hers as he
stroked his hand down her side and over to cup her breast in his hand.  It felt strange to have someone touching her there.  Her mother hadn't told her that would happen, and she'd never even considered men would be interested in a woman's breasts.  She thought they were solely for feeding babies.  It felt good though, so she didn't ask him to stop.

"I'm going to try not to hurt you, so you need to let me know if I do anything that bothers you.  You know the first time will hurt, don't you?"

She nodded, blushing.  "Mother said that men enjoy it, though, so I need to not scream and put up with the pain."  She had been mentally bracing herself for days for this to happen, and she thought she might finally be ready.

He chuckled.  "I hope it's not as bad as all that.  Women are supposed to enjoy it, too."
  He hoped she wasn't too afraid to enjoy herself.

"Really?  Mother said women 'tolerate it' while men want to do it all the time."

"Your mother...she's not someone I want to meet anytime soon."

She grinned.  "She's really not as bad as I make her sound."  She put her hand on his shoulder.  She'd been wanting to touch his chest since their first night
in bed together.  "Am I allowed to touch you?" she asked, wondering just what she should and shouldn't do.

"Do you want to?"  He loved the idea of her touching him, but he didn't want her to do anything she didn't want to do.

She nodded.  "I've been wanting to touch your chest since the first night.  Is that okay?"  She knew it wasn't something she should admit, but she just didn't care.  She wanted to touch him, and that's all there was to it.

He smiled, kissing her softly.  "Of course, it's okay.  We're married.  What we do together is all right as long as both of us like it."
 

"So if I don't like any of this, we won't do it again?"
she teased.

He groaned.  "If you don't like it after a few times, we'll do it less.  I can't promise never again."  He ran his hand around to her back, stroking it gently. "You want children, don't you?"

"Yes, and this is how we get them."  Elaine stroked her hand down his chest and over his nipple.  When he sucked in a breath, her fingers returned to his nipple, toying with it.  "You like that?" she asked, surprised.

"I do.  I like having your hands on me."
  He closed his eyes and just enjoyed her soft hands against him.

His chest was smooth and hard, and she loved how it felt under her fingers.  She felt herself tingling all over as she touched him, and she was growing uncomfortable between her legs. Not really a pain, but more of a restless feeling. 

When she moved a little on the bed, he asked, "Am I hurting you?  Is this painful?"  He didn't know how he'd stop, but if he was hurting her, he would without hesitation.

She shook her head.  "No, I just feel...strange."
  She couldn't explain it to him better than that.

"What do you mean?"

She blushed, wondering how to tell him where she felt funny.  "I'd rather not say."

He frowned.  "You can tell me anything.  I'm your husband."  He hated the idea of her keeping secrets from him, and if he was hurting her in any way, he needed to know about it.

"Not this."  She shook her head, refusing to tell him.

"What feels strange?"
  He was worried that it was something he was doing wrong, and he wouldn't hurt her for anything.

She whispered, even though she knew no one could hear them.  "Between my legs.  I feel strange."
  She knew her face was flaming red, and she was glad the room was mostly dark, so he couldn't see her blushes.

He
stifled a laugh as he kissed her forehead, his hand going down her hip to her thigh.  "That's a good thing.  It means you like what we're doing." 

"It does?"
  Her mother hadn't mentioned that would happen.

"Definitely."  His hand caught the hem of her nightgown and started to pull it up.  "I want to take this off you."
 

"Please don't!"
  She couldn't bear for him to see her naked.

"Why not?  I want to see you."
  He understood she was shy, but this seemed to be more than that.

"I'm not ready for you to see my leg.  Can you just...move it out of the way?"
  She was more than willing to follow through with this, but she couldn't let him see her that way.

He sighed.  "It won't bother me to see."

"Please!"  She knew her leg wasn't pretty, and she didn't want to see disgust in his eyes when he looked at her.

He kissed her softly.  "I won't take it off if you don't want me to."  His fingers went to the buttons at the front of her nightgown which went from her neckline to her waist.  "I'm going to unbutton you so I can touch your skin, though."

The thought of his fingers on her breasts made her tingle more.  "I think I'd like that."  She stayed silent as he unbuttoned each of the buttons, his hands parting the fabric and one of them slipping inside to stroke her soft skin.  She let out a low moan when he caught her nipple between his thumb and forefinger and rolled it softly.  "That feels good," she whispered.

He smiled, leaning down to capture her other nipple with his lips, tugging it into his mouth and suckling her, his tongue moving back and forth against her nipple, causing her to thrash under him.
  He released her nipple and pressed his lips against hers.  "You taste so good to me."

She clutched his shoulders in her hands, feeling odd as he rested on his forearm over her, his lips brushing against her bare chest.  "It's so...strange letting someone touch me this way."  Her voice was a mere whisper.

"But do you like it?" he asked.  He needed her to enjoy what they were doing together.

"I do.  I just keep expecting my mother to walk in and tell me to stop it any second."
She knew it was crazy, but that's what she kept thinking about.  Her mother would love to interrupt her doing anything she was enjoying.

He laughed.  "Your mother isn't here, sweetheart.  It's just you and me.  Learning together."  His hand went to the hem of her nightgown and dragged it up over her waist, his hand going to the juncture between her thighs.  He moved one finger along her crease, sliding it inside her deeply.

She gripped his shoulder's tightly, her eyes widening as she felt his finger inside her.  Was what he was doing all right?  After a moment she stopped worrying about what her mother would think and just enjoyed the sensations as he carefully moved his finger in an out of her body.  "That...feels nice."

He breathed a sigh of relief.  She was going to enjoy this after all.  He removed his finger and rolled atop her, moving one hand down to guide him to her entrance.  His lips pressed against hers as he pushed inside her, swallowing her slight gasp of pain with his kiss.

Afterward, he laid on his side holding her close, both of them panting.  "That was more than I expected," she said, kissing his shoulder. 

He gathered her closer, kissing the top of her head.  "Honestly, it was more than I expected as well."  He sighed happily.  "How did I get so lucky to walk into a restaurant and find you there?" 

Elaine laughed.  "I'm the lucky one."  She snuggled into him, her head on his shoulder, happy to just be with him.  She yawned loudly, closing her eyes.  Her mother had scared her about this, but she loved it.  Life was certainly better away from Beckham.