Lucca's Lust: The Luminara Series Book 3 (34 page)

She looks offended. I do not fucking care, anything it takes for my girl. Marco hisses, apologises to the woman, and drags me back to my seat and tells me to sit down and shut my mouth or I will get us thrown out of the hospital.

I pace the floor, give the vending machine a good fucking kicking, and get warned by the janitor to sit down or he will have me escorted out by police escort. Dickhead. Marco shoves a bottle of water and two painkillers in my hand. Nonna and Mamma call twice. I have interrogated the receptionist at the desk every five minutes but nothing.

Uncooperative bitch.

If it was not for the fact that the doors into triage are security operated, I would just barge in there. A male nurse in blue scrubs exits the doors and speaks to the receptionist, who rolls her eyes and points in my direction. My heart almost vaults up and lodges in my throat. My stomach hits the floor.

Standing up, I ask if Lexi is okay in Italian. He advises me that she will be okay, but she has a compound fracture to her wrist and needs surgery. Oh my fucking God, my baby … surgery? This is my worst nightmare. What have I done?

The colour drains from my face. Marco senses I am too stunned and overwhelmed, so he takes over. He asks a string of sensible questions that I would have asked myself had I been able too. Can I get in and see her? How serious it is? How long will surgery take? Is it dangerous procedure? Will she recover? Is there anything else wrong with her?

The male nurse advises that I cannot get in and see her because she is being prepped for surgery, but it is a straightforward procedure and I will be able to see her when she is moved from surgery into her own room. Checking the notes, he realises I have an exceptional health care package, so he agrees she will have her own private suite in a different wing of the hospital.

Broken, fractured, shattered … I have damaged her wrist. I am in disbelief. It is so hard to comprehend. I dropped her. I broke her. My baby needs surgery all because of me. Thanking him when I am able to form words, he advises that there is a private and more comfortable waiting area next to the suites and asks the receptionist to buzz us through and give us directions when we are ready.

Marco suggests I should get in touch with Hazel to tell her, but just as I search for my phone, Hazel and her boyfriend Dominic come barging into the waiting area. Hazel looks dishevelled and upset, as if she has been crying, Dominic’s eyes burn with fury, his body stiffened and fists clenched. He is angry.

“You fucking bastard. What the fuck did you do to her?” he shouts before landing me square in the jaw with a powerful blow of his fist. Rubbing my jaw and cheek, which stings like a bitch, I straighten up and take everything he is willing to give me. I deserve it. All of it.

Hazel yells, pulling him back. Marco stands between us. Once Marco calms him down, we head to a private waiting room. The receptionist glad to see the back of me. After explaining about Lexi’s wrist and surgery, it takes over an hour to explain what happened and convince them it was an accident, but I take full responsibility.

Dominic is quiet, not sure whether to believe me or not. Pulling Hazel to the side, I beg for her forgiveness and assure her I am every bit as worried about Lexi as she is …
if not even more
. She is equally as angry with me as Dominic is but as she got the chance to meet me, she knows I would never intentionally hurt Lexi.

The only way I can convince her is by telling her the truth … that I love Lexi. She taps her chin with her thumb, contemplating it. I am not sure whether she believes me or not. Feeling deflated, exhausted, and impatient waiting on news about Lexi, I pace the floor and yank at the hair brushing my nape. Sighing, I slump into a chair in the corner, hanging my head.

Marco quietly talks with Hazel and Dominic, I guess he is probably trying to convince them that I am so fucking sorry and it is killing me inside. It must work because Hazel comes and sits on the chair near me and says she forgives me, that she knows I would never hurt Lexi. Marco is a fucking saint. He has my back. I owe him big for tonight.

“Did you mean it when you said you loved her?” she asks.

“Yes, I mean it. I have never loved anyone as much. Jesus, Hazel … she is my air to breathe. I love her so much it hurts, and I am so scared of losing her. We have had such a great time. She trusted me and has gradually been letting me in. She is everything to me, Hazel. She is perfect,” I croak, swallowing hard, determined not to break down in front of Hazel and Dominic. But shit, after the day and night I have just had, I do not really care anymore if I come across as being a pussy.

“I love her shyness, sweetness, feistiness, cuteness, beauty, kind-heartedness, independence, innocence … body, mind, and soul. I love it all. I love her through her vulnerability, anxieties, and nervousness … even though it drives me crazy sometimes. I love every single thing about her. Scars … fears …nightmares … the lot.” I scratch my jaw before placing my hand on my heart.

“Wow, you really have her sussed. Jesus, Lucca … you were quick.” There is a trace of humour in her voice. She fixes her hair, stretches, sighs, and presses her lips firmly together.

She surprises me by rubbing her hand over my back to comfort me. Dominic shoots her a wry look. She tsk-tsks, rolling her eyes.

“I am sorry about Dominic. He has always looked out for Lexi, especially when Cameron isn’t around. He is seriously angry about tonight. He feels responsible for her in a way,” she says.

It is a knock to my ego. I am extremely grateful Lexi has such caring friends. I do not want to over step my mark here, as Dominic does not even know me—and I fucked up big time tonight—but I feel angry that he feels responsible for her. She is mine and possessively I want very much to be solely responsible for her.

“Do not apologise, I would be the exact same. I am thankful Lexi has such good friends taking care of her. Hazel, you know Lexi better than I do. Do you think she will forgive me for this? Do you think I have missed my chance at having a future with her?” I suck in a huge breath, hoping she gives me good news.

“I don’t know. This will set her back though, so be prepared for her being distant from you, like she was in the beginning. Bad shit has happened to her, Lucca, and for her to be so distressed or upset causing her to
run,
that in itself will traumatise her, never mind the events of tonight.” Hazel removes her hand after a pause and asks Dominic to fetch some coffee for everyone.

He has an even mightier death stare than his little five foot blond girlfriend here. I press my lips together in a firm line and frown. Hazel fetches some change from her purse and I grab my wallet from my pocket, but she shoos my hand away, giving her money to Dominic before kissing him on the lips. I look down between my knees. Once Dominic is out of ear shot, she sits back down.

“Look, if she trusted you, that’s impressive. She doesn’t do it very easily. And I believe that you love her. She’s very easy to fall in love with. But please promise me you will not hurt her anymore. She doesn’t need it. She needs love.” Her brow creases as she tilts her head, scrolling through her contacts on her phone.

“I promise you … I will fucking promise her the world. I just need her to forgive me so I can love her properly, the way she deserves.”

Hazel smiles weakly as if she feels sorry for me.

“I wanted to get rid of Dominic so I can call Cameron and update him. Cammy is frantic, but Dominic is best not speaking to him because he will rile him up. I want to put him right,” she says, dialling Cameron’s number.

Giving her privacy, I go back and sit next to Marco. Hazel discreetly talks with Cameron, telling him about the surgery, informing him we have no updates yet, then passes the phone over to me because he wants to speak with me.

Standing, I excuse myself and go out of the room, heading into a nearby corridor to talk to him in private. Hazel has softened the blow by telling him how much I love Lexi and want to protect her and need her better and well.

I recall the night’s events, manning up to give him my honesty, but explicitly assure him that it was an accident. I hold full responsibility and tell him how sorry I am for what happened. I guarantee, pledge, and promise how much I love his sister and give him my word that I will take excellent care of her.

He seems to believe me, because Lexi has been calling him while on holiday, filling him in and promising him that she trusts me. I am not sure what else Lexi or Hazel has told him, but he accepts my apology and my extended offer of flying him over here to stay with us to see his sister and meet me in person.

He can come, but not for another few days because of his rota at work. I assure him that she will have the best hospital care money can buy and will be smothered in care from myself. I also tell him that pending Lexi’s recovery time, I would like her to stay here with me while I care for her before taking her home.

If she agrees, we need that time for me to fight to regain Lexi’s trust again so I will need to start from the beginning. I need to build a bridge back to where we were. I should have been patient, like Nonno said … There is a reason she never wanted to tell me about her mother, but it does not change how I feel about her.

He is dubious at first, so we both agree that he will be able to suss his sister out and what she wants when he comes over to visit her. Hanging up, I search for someone to tell me what is happening and if there is any news. I am getting frantically impatient here.

The male nurse from earlier says she should be out of surgery within a couple of hours. All going well, she will most likely stay a few days here recuperating, but it will take anything between five and eight weeks for her wrist to fully recover.

Fuck! My baby girl … Jesus. The thought sickens me further. Eight fucking weeks? How could I have been so fucking stupid? Christ … I have never felt as much self-loathing as I do right now since the night Jasmine was run over. I ask about the driver in the car which turned over. He is going to be fine … mild concussion, bruises, and wounds.

Punching the wall, I curse when the male nurse is out of sight. Back in the waiting room, Dominic is back with coffee. He stands and stares at me when I enter, his brow furrowing. Offering me a cup, I shake my head and slump on the chair, gazing into space.

Marco convinces me to drink something as it might be a long night. Sheepishly, I thank Dominic and accept the cup. He offers his other hand to shake mine, an apology of sorts.

“Cammy called me when he came off the phone to you. We good?” Dominic says dryly.

Cameron has obviously pacified Dominic and convinced him not to serve me my balls on a platter. “Yeah … I … um … I just … fuck,” Groaning, I run my hand through my hair. I want to apologise again, but I feel numb. I just cannot form words, thinking about the excruciating pain Lexi must be in and the ordeal she has suffered.

He pats my shoulder saying Lexi will be fine, that she is a fighter … a strong woman, before sitting down next to me. I form a ghost of a smile, nod half-heartedly, and pass Hazel her phone. I spill some of the coffee over my hand and knee; I am shaking that much.

“Fuck!” I shake my hand out. Marco passes me a handkerchief.

“You look like shit,” he says to me.

I rub my forehead. I do not really care what I look like right now. “When Lexi comes out of surgery, can you pick up some toiletries, clothes, my laptop, chargers, and my tablet for me from the farmhouse? I am not going back. I am not leaving her here alone; I will stay until she is sent home,” I say shakily before forcing myself to take a drink of coffee.

“Okay, sure. You can phone or text me and let me know what else you need, or if you want anything brought in for Lexi,” he says, sitting back in his chair, stretching out his arms and legs. He looks exhausted too, but I refrain from telling him that. He is beyond pissed at me.

When Hazel and Dominic are not listening, I need to tell him to arrange a clean-up back at the farmhouse. The thought of Lexi’s smeared blood, the broken pot … Jesus … I do not want her to see that if she agrees to come back with me.

I need to get her a new journal as well because I know how much it meant to her. Why did I not control my temper? Once my head is straight, and I know Lexi is on the mend, I plan on calling Cristofano to purchase all those diamonds she was innocently admiring in the jewellery boutique window.

Hazel rests her head on Dominic’s shoulders, yawning and closing her eyes. I stare at the clock until my eyes are blurry and strained. It seems like hours have passed when the doctor comes to tell us that Lexi’s surgery went well and was straightforward.

They have moved her into a suite but she is still sleepy, coming in and out of consciousness as the anaesthetic works its way out her system. I tell him I need to see her. He nods, gets me to sign off some paperwork, and then asks me to follow him.

Marco says goodbye for now, but Hazel and Dominic eagerly come with me. Opening the door, the wind leaves my lungs until my throat and chest feel strangled. My baby is lying on the bed, hooked up to all sorts of shit, sleeping with an oxygen mask on.

What have I done?

She looks so lifeless and ill, lying in a thin hospital gown with her feet bandaged, hand and wrist set in a surgical sling, head and arms covered in dry blood, and face chalk white. I wince, seeing the IV drips feeding into her veins.

My precious dolcezza.

Hazel gasps and slaps her hand over her mouth, turning in towards Dominic’s chest while he hugs her tightly. Trembling, I make my way over to her side, side down, and cup her face in my trembling hands before kissing her softly everywhere—eyes, cheeks, forehead, lips, chin, and cheeks again until I break.

Hazel sits at the other side and leans over to kiss her head before stroking her hair, moving it behind her ears. Shock has got a hold of me, I do not know what I was expecting to see, but it fucking destroys me seeing her like this.

The doctor leaves us and says he will be back in to check on her shortly. Closing my eyes, I whisper against her neck, praying for her well-being and her forgiveness. Hazel notices Lexi is waking up and calls for the doctor.