Authors: Love Belvin
My child? I’m a grown woman!
Stenton walked off to his waiting truck, tossing me a last glare before getting in. I turned my head and inadvertently collided with my mother’s feverish glower.
“He’s just so frustrating
! I don’t get him. You know how I feel, Mom. You know what I’ve been through. You said yourself, you don’t like the confusion taking place between us.”
“I said I don’t like confusion, honey. Stenton doesn’
t at all seem to be the one confused.” She gave me a searing gaze before walking off herself, leaving me, just like Stenton did moments before.
~~~~~~~~~~
July 2008
“What are you looking at? I thought you came over to help me sort this laundry.” I laid Jordan’s fresh onesie in the pile with the rest of the white ones on the dining room table.
Tynisha glanced up from her laptop and rolled her eyes. She sighed, “Mascot, what you need is a damn maid, not someone to
help
you. Have you looked me up lately? Do you not know what I do for a living? It’s a little awkward when I don’t even do my own.”
“But that’s wh
at you said when you called to tell me you were stopping by.”
“That was just to get me in here. God knows you won’t come out,” she hissed as she went back into her screen.
“Anyway,” I exhaled. “What are you doing?”
“I’m
…ummm…looking up Alton’s activities to see if he’s been cheating.”
“Huhn?”
My jaw fell to the table.
“Yeah. There’s this small production company out of Delaware
—run by some guy Alton went to high school with that moved down there—who has been doing a documentary on him for years now.” Tynisha’s voice was low and the cadence of her words staggered as she was so engrossed in what was on that screen. “They’re recording him like my camera crew does me, and uploading small clips on their website to drum up anticipation. And
I’ve
been watching to catch him in the act.”
Tynisha and I had been relatively cool for months, but never had I felt comfortable enough to inquire about the policing she does with Alton.
“How would video footage prove anything unless it actually shows him in the act?” I knew Alton could be a bit dumb, but even he wasn’t that foolish.
“Look.” Tynisha flip
ped the laptop so that I could see the screen. “See, I know Alton. If he’s fucking this bitch, he’ll avoid looking at her in public. He doesn’t want anybody to know. In his mind, he thinks the best way to fool people is to not acknowledge her at all. Because Alton can’t keep his dick in his pants, he naturally stares at a woman with his tongue hanging from his mouth. So, I’m looking to see what he does with this one girl,” she points her perfectly manicured nail at the grainy image of a woman on the screen walking down an alley with at least six other people alongside Alton.
“So, what is he doing?”
“I haven’t figured it out yet. This is my twentieth time watching and I see a little eye action on his part, but I can’t quite tell.”
“Does that method really work? Is your theory even valid?”
“It works. It’s how I was able to tell he was fucking your slutty cousin a few years back when she tried to say he got her popped. I looked up the footage and saw he wouldn’t look at her when y’all was leaving the country club and diners. He doesn’t even know how he gives himself away. I could also tell that Stenton was fucking you because he kept stealing looks your way. Alton is the exact opposite.”
That stopped me
in my tracks as I held a burping cloth midair. “Tynisha,” I shook my head and tried stifling my laughter. “Stenton and I weren’t involved back then when Alton was sleeping with Angela.” I decided to ignore her labeling of Angela, realizing it would be futile in correcting. She was understandably upset by the situation. “We didn’t start…you know…sleeping together until well after that summer.”
“Well, whatever. My point is every woman has her method of telling if her man is cheating. Every man has a rhythm. I know Alton’s. Like, I always try to make sure to give Al the snatch before one of us leaves town. When I can’t give it to him, it increases the chances of him getting it from somebody else.”
I rolled my eyes at that utter bull crap.
Men who want to cheat will cheat!
I sighed and wrinkled my face to fortify myself. “Ty, doesn’t that get a bit exhausting, always checking up on him to make sure he’s doing his part in keeping with fidelity?”
She looked up and into the distance, considering my question, as elementary as it was. Tynisha shrugged, “I don’t know, girl. I’ve been doing it for so long, I have no idea.”
I scoffed. “It would get a bit tiring to me.”
Then her eyes narrowed. “Well, it beats sitting here doing laundry like you’re getting paid for it. What are you doing with yourself?”
I fought my grin as I shook my head at Tynisha again.
Tynisha’s neck snapped back. “Mascot, don’t judge me! I’m sure you know Stenton’s rhythm and you try your damnedest to make sure he doesn’t trip out on you, especially with Erika Erceg sniffing around his balls. Him having a baby recently has not slowed her chase at all, in case you didn’t notice.”
I’d heard of Erika. She was a drop dead gorgeous woman of Syrian de
scent and had been almost an overnight household name for a sex tape of her and a rapper that went viral a few years back. Erika was also a reality television star like Tynisha. I got the distinct impression she didn’t care for her competition. But I had no idea she had something for Stenton.
I tried shaking that scenario from my mind and resume
d folding clothes. “Stenton and I are not together.”
Tynisha didn’t skip a beat when she observed, “According to you two, you were never together, but
baby Rogers back there,” she flicked her fingers to the back of the apartment where a napping Jordan was, “…would claim otherwise.”
I chuckled while shaking my head. That’s when I noticed Tynisha staring at me dubiously.
“What?” I narrowed my brows.
“You and Stenton
ain’t sleeping together?” Her already slanted eyes, contracted even more.
“No!” I snorted. “Stenton and I haven’t been together in ages.”
“I’m sure since the baby…”
I shook my head. Not that I was exactly comfortable with sharing about my sex life or lack thereof, but I felt I could be candid with Tynisha. She was a celebrity herself. What public figure didn’t appreciate confidence?
“No. I haven’t been with him since well before I had Jordan.”
“You better be careful. I know Stenton’s a freak. I’ve heard he’s into that
kinky shit…chains and whips and shit.”
I let out a small
chuckle as I shook my head at her musing.
“Damn, he is!
Isn’t he?” she blurted in a revelatory manner, lustful even.
“I didn’t say that.”
Tynisha continued her examining, staring at me. “You didn’t have to. The color in your cheeks is telling me that he is. Not only that, but look at how hard your nipples are all of a sudden.” I re-draped my silk—and apparently thin—robe. “What the hell’s going on, Mascot? Okay, you guys haven’t exactly been in an official relationship. I can’t judge that. Look at Alton and me: we’ve been engaged for three years and have as many kids and all we have to show for it is countless scandals.” She took a breath. “But you two… Stenton’s never wavered in his feelings for you. It’s clear that he’s crazy about you.”
I huffed. “Well, I can’t tell.”
“Well, yeah, because men can be so fucking retarded with the way they express themselves. But trust me, I know. That’s why I’ve been chilling with you. Not because you’re my speed. He’s made it clear that you should be treated as a part of the circle.” She shrugged again. “I don’t know…” She then went back to her footage.
That only lasted a few seconds. Tynisha
popped her head back up toward me as I stood over the table, folding and sorting.
“
Mascot, you’re here with the baby. He comes by and you guys don’t go at it?”
“No. He spends time with his son. He has a room in the back for when he can’t come until late at night, and even when that happens, he takes the night shift to let me sleep. We’ve been doing a much better job at co-parenting since the
christening.”
What a fiasco that was.
It was hard coming back from that. Stenton would still come over for Jordan, but hardly looked at me, much less conversed with me. It took some time for me to officially apologize and offer to do better at including him in all decisions made regarding Jordan. I’d tried to play it safe with Stenton since then.
“I’m just so
damn confused.” Tynisha wouldn’t drop the subject.
“About what? What’s the confusion?” I returned
with just as much frustration, and snorted, “If he wanted me, he would’ve made that clear long ago, and we’d be together. I respect his wishes and will give him time to decide what he wants. Life goes on, right?”
In all honesty, I was simply happy to be in a better place from the breakup that occurred nearly a year ago when he dropped me off and said goodbye for no reason at all. Being pregnant with Jordan eclipsed that, and having
him around pushed it to the back burner, but there was still an ache in my chest from his decision.
Tynisha shook her head. “
You around here doing laundry…first of all, you need to start with getting a damn maid, then a nanny.” She snatched a few items from the laundry basket. “Then you need to get your back blown out. There’s no way a woman can function if she’s connected to Stenton Rogers, but not being taken care of. He’s running around here flossing it up for everybody else, but you ain’t getting a piece of the pie. You young girls need to learn how it’s done. Because I guarantee you if he was getting some of that snatch, there wouldn’t be any confusion in your relationship. You, unlike my dumb ass, would probably be married by now.”
That
hurled me into a pit of confusion. I stilled myself, processing Tynisha’s new theory.
“Well, anyway, once we’re done I’m
gonna call my guy to come over to take your measurements. What are you…a size six now? I have some fun pieces that you would kill in!”
I let Tynisha ramble on, too stuck on the mention of marriage for me and Stenton.
~~~~~~~~~~
August 2008
~
Stenton
~
“You don’t know? What does that mean, Stent?” her voice purred
harmoniously, a little too sweetly.
“Nah. I got some things coming up.
You know summers are just as crazy for me with endorsement work, and I have to steal all the time I can with my kid. My schedule is pretty tight now.”
“I know, but…
Stentiiiiiiiin,” she enunciated my name fully as she called out. Erika was laying it on thick, but I wasn’t ready.
I needed more time for
Zoey to come off her independent bullshit and tell me she wanted a family with me and Jordan. I didn’t want to force her or influence her on that. So far, everything I set up for her and the baby had been met with her willingness. She hadn’t fought me on child support or the monthly stipend I’d arranged for her. She never oscillated much on the cars or the apartment I bought her. Neither had I heard a complaint about the money I’d given her parents as rent while Zoey and my unborn child lived there. I knew she wasn’t the type of woman easily influenced by money, but she hadn’t resisted anything. She just went with my flow. Well, why the fuck hadn’t she expressed the desire for me?
“Why don’t we do this:
let’s wait until the season begins, give me a few weeks to settle into it, and we’ll see when and where we can meet during my away games. Deal?”
Erika sucked her teeth. “I’m not happy about it, but I’ll take what I can get.
Don’t be shocked when we finally get together…and alone if I ask to see all your tats. Rumor is you got a new one below the waistline and that’s the one I have to get a close look at. I’m near-sided, you know.”
Shit!
She was coming with it. Lately, she’d been more aggressive with her flirting. She’d just made it clear that she wanted to suck my cock.
Goddamn.
I turned the corner and head
ed into the kitchen. Under any other circumstances, I would have played along with the seduction game Erika seemed down for, but my life wasn’t that simple. I was fucking stuck on another woman. One that didn’t know if she wanted me or to conquer the damn world.
I chuckled, “Funny thing about them fucking rumors:
they’re not always fun, once discovered, as they were in theory. I’ll check you later, E.”
“By
e, Stent.”
“
Mmmmm…” Alton purred as he snuggled into Tynisha’s neck.
Charmed by it, she stroked the side of his face with her free hand as they leaned on the marble countertops
in their state-of-the-art kitchen. Unlike the rest of the world in television land, I was accustomed to seeing this public display of affection between the two of them. Alton had some shit with him, but he was as tender as they came, off camera.