Lizzie Marshall's Wedding (12 page)

‘So, what about you? I’m assuming you’re divorced too. You don’t wear a ring and I didn’t notice any wedding photos in your house but you said your husband proposed in here – was it an unpleasant end?’

Becky hung her head.

‘You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to. Just tell me that you’re free to see me and that I’m not going to get a visit from an irate husband – that’s all I need to know.’

She lifted her head and smiled weakly. ‘I’m a widow. My husband ... died ... five years ago last Saturday, to be precise.’

‘Oh God Becky. I’m so sorry. How awful for you.’

She nodded. Max seemed genuinely shocked and she wondered if she should tell him? He’d been open with her, even admitting he’d had an affair. She took a deep breath and a large gulp of champagne.

‘I met Jeremy at university, we lived in the same house- share. It wasn’t love at first sight, in fact, I’m not really sure when we went from being friends to being in love, it just sort of happened. Anyway, we married on my twenty-fifth birthday and I thought we were happy, then, he seemed to change. I actually thought he was having an affair because he became rather secretive and, little things kept happening. Then I fell pregnant with Lily and –’

‘You’ve got a child?’ Max looked stunned.

‘Yes! I ... I thought you knew. Surely someone in the village mentioned it?’

Max shook his head but didn’t speak.

‘Well, she’s five next month. She’s with her grandparents at the moment and I’m missing her terribly. I ... Oh! I see. If you didn’t know then ... I ... I suppose this changes things, as far as you and I are concerned doesn’t it? You don’t want to date a woman with a child in tow do you?’

At that moment their meals arrived and, for what seemed like hours but was only a matter of minutes, Max studied her face.

‘So that’s who all the pictures are of, in your house?’ he said when they were alone again.  ‘I thought they were your niece or something. It didn’t even occur to me for some reason. Wow!’ He emptied his glass in one gulp then he cut into the pan-fried turbot he’d ordered.

Becky had ordered the same but now that it was in front of her, she wasn’t sure she was hungry. She took a few mouthfuls and had to admit, it was delicious.

‘I take it things have changed,’ she said, after several minutes of silence. ‘I understand. Don’t worry.’ Tears began to prick at her eyes and she couldn’t look at him. ‘We’ll call it quits after dinner. You don’t have to take me to the dance, Jess and Susie will be there so –’

‘Hold on a minute,’ he said, putting down his knife and fork. ‘What makes you think things have changed? Because you’ve got a daughter you mean? Do you think that changes me wanting to see you again?’

She raised her eyes to his. ‘Well doesn’t it? Lily is the most important person in my life and my life revolves around her, if I’m going to be honest. You hadn’t bargained on having a five year old around had you? Even if our relationship was just a bit of fun, a child in the picture puts a bit of a dampener on it doesn’t it? It’s okay, I truly understand.’

‘Whoa! I’ll admit I didn’t know and I’ll also admit it is a bit of a shock. I’ve never dated anyone with a child before so I have no idea what’s involved but it doesn’t stop me from wanting to see you. I’m not looking for a serious relationship, as I told you, but your daughter doesn’t change things from my perspective.’ He picked up his cutlery. ‘This turbot is excellent.’

Becky didn’t know what to think. The last thing she had thought she wanted, just a few days ago, was a man in her life, especially a man like Max Bedford. Now, as she sat across the table from him, listening to him telling her that he wanted to see her again and that he wasn’t going to run away at the mention of her daughter, she realised that she didn’t want a man – she wanted Max Bedford.

She knew she was taking a risk. He’d made it clear that a long term relationship was out of the question and he’d admitted to cheating on his wife. If anyone should be running away, it should be her but she knew she wouldn’t – not yet anyway. It had been a very long time since she’d felt like this about a man, any man, and perhaps her friends were right. Perhaps it was time she had some fun and lived a little.

‘So, when will Lily be home?’ he asked between mouthfuls.

‘She was due home on Sunday but because of the weather, she’s stayed on a few extra days. They live over an hour’s drive away and, whilst that’s not far, I’d rather Harry didn’t drive in bad conditions – just in case. He’s in his late seventies and he’s definitely a fair weather driver. As soon as the roads clear, they’ll bring her home.’

‘Why don’t you go and get her?’

‘I ... I don’t have a car. I had to sell it a few years ago. Things were ... tight after Jeremy ... died.’ She didn’t want to tell him that, effectively the car had been repossessed.

‘I’m sorry. You were telling me about him. You thought he was having an affair. Was he?’

‘Oh. No ... he ... he had ... a gambling problem.’ Becky cast her eyes down and toyed with the napkin on her lap.

‘What?’

She nodded. ‘I actually didn’t find out until ... oh, I may as well just say it.’ She raised her eyes to his. ‘Shortly after I told him I was pregnant he disappeared. No note, no phone call, nothing. I thought he’d had an accident but there was no trace of him. Then, I discovered he’d emptied our joint bank account and ... and an account handled by his firm – he was a solicitor – which held a large inheritance from my parents, even though, that was in my sole name. He’d forged my signature.’

‘Shit! And run off with the money?’ Max was clearly stunned.

Becky nodded.

‘You said he died. How? Sorry, if this is too painful, just say.’

‘It was five years ago, the pain has subsided – a bit. Apparently, he lost it all, rather quickly and, having nowhere else to go, he came back here a few months later ... and ... well, the police said he threw himself in Beckleston River – or fell. They found his body in the January, a few days after my birthday; Lily was born that March. His parents were devastated. They couldn’t believe their only son could do such a thing. I was just numb. If it hadn’t been for Jess and Susie, I don’t know how I would have got through the first couple of years.’ She realised she was rambling. She licked her lips and gulped down the contents of her glass as if her revelation had parched her.

Max leant back against his chair. ‘Bloody Hell! And your parents? You said one of the accounts held an inheritance from them. Was it a trust fund they’d set up or are they ...?’

Becky sucked in a deep breath and nodded. ‘They ... they died in a car crash just before my sixteenth birthday.’

‘Shit Becky!’ Max leant forward and took one of her hands in his. ‘You’ve had it really tough. I’m so, so sorry.’

She shrugged, trying not to show her pain. ‘That’s life, as they say. Well, that’s taken a bit of the fun out of this evening hasn’t it?’ She forced a smile. ‘Perhaps we could change the subject. I’m not sure I can handle much more of this doom and gloom. I ... I’m astonished all that came out actually. I don’t usually tell anyone. Oh ... and Jeremy’s ... financial problems ... are not common knowledge so ...’

‘I won’t say a word, don’t worry. I’m glad you told me though.’ He squeezed her hand in his and smiled.

‘I don’t know why I did, to be honest. I hardly know you after all.’

‘Sometimes, we need to share things Becky and sometimes, it helps if it’s with someone we hardly know. You can trust me not to repeat anything you’ve told me. Would you like a dessert or coffee or something?’

Becky shook her head. ‘No thanks.’

‘Perhaps, we should head to the dance, then, if you’re feeling up to it. I’ll get the bill.’

‘Thanks Max. I could do with letting my hair down a bit.’

She studied his face and somehow, she knew he was telling the truth. Her secrets were safe with him. Her heart, on the other hand, might be a different matter.

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

Becky was enjoying herself, despite the painful memories that had flooded back in the restaurant earlier. Everyone was paying her compliments and Max was being so attentive and thoughtful that for one night, she thought she could forget her past and all her present worries; even forget she was a mother and instead, be a sexy, vibrant young woman, dancing in the arms of the most incredible man she was ever likely to meet.

She couldn’t believe she’d gone from thinking that he was an arrogant twerp – and a lot worse, to thinking that he was someone rather special, in a matter of a few days. Of course, she had no illusions, in spite of the wonderful things he’d said. Men like Max Bedford didn’t fall for women like her, especially when they had a child to consider, she knew that. She was just different, that must have been it. He was used to women falling at his feet at first glance. She hadn’t, and he had found that intriguing, possibly even a challenge. But even if she only had this one night with him, she was beginning to believe, it would be worth it.

He’d said he wanted to see her again but that could have been a line. She’d have to wait and see. If she did see him again, she’d have to make sure that Lily didn’t get attached to him – but she didn’t really think there was any risk of that. Max was hardly the type of man who would want to take the family out. She’d probably only see him in the evening, once Lily was in bed. Or maybe only at the weekend. He’d told her that he lived in London.

It had been years since she’d thrown caution to the wind and she’d been so busy trying to juggle money, pay off Jeremy’s debts, be a mother and maintain her business, that she’d forgotten how to be a woman and, she’d forgotten that she actually used to enjoy having sex.

She spent the evening dancing, laughing and having fun. And she spent most of it in Max’s arms, desperately wanting to kiss him but knowing that was one thing she couldn’t do in public, and desperately wanting to make love with him – and that was obviously, another.

‘Did you have a good time tonight?’ Max asked when he pulled up outside her cottage, shortly after midnight.

‘The best. Thank you so much Max. I honestly can’t remember when I last enjoyed myself this much. I’m sorry I spoiled dinner by telling you all that stuff. I can’t believe I did. I never tell anyone.’

‘I’m glad you did and you didn’t spoil dinner one bit.’

She wondered what to do next. Max was sitting at a slight angle, watching her and she suddenly realised that he didn’t seem to have any intention of getting out. Had he had second thoughts already? Something very cold wrapped itself around her heart and started squeezing.

‘D ... did you have a good time?’ she asked, half afraid to hear his answer.

He brushed a stray hair from her cheek with his hand and something flashed across his eyes. He smiled and his voice was soft when he spoke.

‘Even better than I expected.’ He turned her face to his with his fingers and leant across and kissed her.

It wasn’t like his previous kiss. It was soft and gentle, tentative almost and he pulled away after just a moment.

‘Shall I walk you to the door?’ he asked, his seatbelt still fixed in place.

Becky was confused. Had this all been a game after all? Had he indeed “led her up the garden path” as she’d first suspected he might? Now that he knew he could have her, he no longer wanted her, was that it? She thought she might burst into tears any minute. Should she ask him in? Would he say no? She shook her head, afraid her voice would betray her.

‘I’ll call you,’ he said but he didn’t ask for her number.

She took a deep breath, gave him a quick, false smile and pushed open the door. ‘Of course you will,’ she said, her voice full of emotion. She got out and stumbled up the path, completely forgetting that she hadn’t changed her footwear.

She opened the door and almost jumped out of her skin. Max was beside her and was spinning her around to face him.

‘Don’t get upset,’ he said, his troubled eyes searching hers. ‘I will call you; tomorrow, first thing.’

‘You don’t have my number.’ She couldn’t look at him and cast her eyes down.

‘Yes I do. Apart from the fact that you gave it to mum yesterday, I looked up your address and phone number the minute I found out your surname – which was on Saturday after I saw you in the Stores. Mary Parkes told me and she would have told me a lot more besides if Martin hadn’t come out and sent her off to make him tea.’

Becky was astonished. ‘On Saturday! But ... when you took me home on Sunday, you asked for my address.’

‘Beckleston’s a small village and there’s only one R. Cooper – for Rebecca obviously – but I didn’t know exactly where Rosemary Cottage was, although ... I was actually looking for it that morning, when I soaked you. Martin Parkes wouldn’t tell me anything else about you – but I did at least, have your name, address and phone number.’

She couldn’t believe what he was saying. ‘Look Max. I’m not sure what’s going on here. One minute you say that all you want is me and that you got my name, address and phone number within hours of meeting me, and the next, you’re giving me a peck on the cheek and saying you’ll call! I’m not expecting a serious relationship – you’ve made it perfectly clear you don’t want that – and I’m not asking you to make me any promises or commitments; I know this won’t last, but a bit of consistency would be nice. You either want me or you don’t, which is it?’

Max blinked several times in surprise. ‘I thought I’d made that abundantly clear and I kissed you on the lips, not the cheek. I want you and you don’t know quite how much, believe me –’

‘Then why wouldn’t you get out of the car?’

He let out a deep sigh. His hands were resting on her shoulders and he let them slide down the length of her arms then took her hands in his. ‘Because I knew if I did, I wouldn’t want to get back in, at least, not until the morning – if then. I didn’t want to put you under that pressure. If I kiss you properly tonight, I’m not going to want to stop, and I don’t trust myself. I wouldn’t force you, obviously, but – and I say this not out of conceit but out of honesty – if I want to get someone to go to bed with me, I can, believe me.’