Knight of Ocean Avenue (18 page)

Shaz stared after them. “Holy shit.”

Billy nodded. “I come from a family of formidable women.” He turned slowly to Giles. “But I’m six five, weigh two hundred and twenty-five pounds, and hit harder than a sledgehammer. So if you want to live looking like you currently do, I’d get the hell out of here.”

Giles stepped back but looked at Shaz. “He was just a childhood love. You and I are the grown-ups. You say you cheated on me. Well, good. We’re even. Why don’t we put this back together? After all, we have so much in common.”

Shaz barked one of those laughs again. “Really, Giles? I wouldn’t consider being with a man who would do such a thing to someone he says he loves. But more importantly, yes, I did cheat on you. And I intend to keep cheating with the same man as often as he’ll allow me to.” Not once did his eyes stray to Billy.

But Billy’s heart stopped.

B
ILLY
FLOORED
the accelerator, then let up, then stomped again. He was going home—to meet Shaz. After the blowup with Giles, Billy and Shaz had gone back to the reception—separately. Billy had rejoined Sissy, and they had applauded at the sharing of cake, Sissy had caught the bouquet, and they’d cheered and thrown birdseed as the happy couple ran for their limousine. Billy hadn’t stopped shaking the whole time. Teresa had even asked him if he was okay.
That’s the question
.

Was he okay with being more excited than scared at the idea of meeting a man at his apartment who confessed to wanting to give him more blow jobs? His cock jumped.
Yeah, you don’t get a vote.

Was he okay with the idea of being one of those guys that guys like him ridiculed—or worse? One of those guys his family would hate. Well, probably not Teresa and maybe not Rhonda, but his mother?
Shit
.

Was he okay with being gay?

What a question. Not one he’d ever planned to answer in his life. Was he okay with being a loser? That question he’d tried to answer many times. But never gay.

He pulled onto his street, swung into the driveway of his apartment, and took the space reserved for him in the back. In the rearview mirror, he saw the Jaguar.

Billy peered at his own wide eyes.
How the hell can you have waited until you’re twenty-five to have this crisis?

I’ve always been slow.

So true.

Okay, this was it.

He climbed out of the truck, walked to the entrance of the building, and opened the door into the piece-of-shit vestibule that his landlord never spruced up. Billy had asked if he could do it, but he hadn’t had the time or money to paint the hallway and three flights of stairs that led to his apartment. Where was Shaz? He glanced back out the door. He lived in Laguna, for crap sake; nothing would happen to a gay guy here. Still, Billy took the stairs two at a time. When he got to the top, he stopped. There sat Shaz on the top step as if the suit he was wearing wouldn’t have bought the whole building, legs stretched out across the stair, leaning against the banister, reading an e-reader.

Billy laughed. “Well, don’t you pretty up the place?”

He looked up and smiled. “This staircase could use some serious prettying.”

“How long have you been here?”

“Just a few minutes. I scooted out as soon as the happy couple left.” He closed his reader, stood up gracefully, and swept a hand across his butt.

Billy sighed. “I sure hope they’ll be happy.”

“At least Rhonda doesn’t seem to have any illusions about Mitch. That’s better than waking up one day to discover your husband likes boys and, unfortunately, you don’t have a dick.”

Billy unlocked the door and turned on the light, then stepped back so Shaz could cross in front of him. “Cheating on your wedding day seems like a bad omen.”

Shaz turned to him. “But he didn’t cheat. At least, not today. Mitch hasn’t the most powerful will force I’ve ever encountered, which is one of the reasons I think he loves Rhonda. He just happens to have been particularly susceptible to the little shit I’ve been dating. I think with Giles out of the way and all the positive reinforcement he’ll get for his marriage, he’s going to do well.”

“Mewer.”

“Merwaorwr.”

Shaz looked down and smiled. “Hello, boys.” He knelt and started petting the silky fur. Clancy leaped on his lap, knocked him off balance, and Shaz plopped on his butt. Both cats crawled on his sprawled legs.

Billy laughed. “It’s their favorite trick. They’re ecstatic they got to pull it on an unsuspecting newcomer. Careful, they’ll get fur all over you.”

“What else are cats for but to leave their marks on your heart?”

Well, hell, that’s sweet
. Clancy and Yerby purred so loudly Billy could hear them as he crossed into the small kitchen and peered into the refrigerator. “What can I get you to drink?” See, he sounded perfectly normal. Not like he was about to have a nervous breakdown. “I have beer, a half-f bottle of white wine that’s probably kind of old, and iced tea.”

“Beer sounds fine.”

“I’ve never seen you drink it.”

“That’s because I seldom do. But I still enjoy it.”

He wasn’t exactly setting records as a romantic host. Pushing off from the sink, he carried two bottles of beer with two glasses on top into the living room. Okay, where should he put the bottles? Finally he set them both on the coffee table in front of the couch. Was that too much of an invitation?
Sit here and make out with me?
But if he put one bottle by the chair, was that standoffish?
Shit
. He sat down.

Shaz gave the boys one last pet, then kindly but firmly removed them from his lap. He stood in one fluid motion, pulled off his suit coat and draped it over the chair in the dining area, walked over and sat by Billy. He poured the beer against the side of his glass—no head—then leaned back and sipped. “Good beer.”

“Uh, yeah, it’s Mexican.” Duh, he could see that from the label.

“Feeling a little awkward, are we?” Shaz glanced at him sideways.

“Yeah.”

“Me too. I don’t even hang out with straight friends unless they’re women, much less—well, you know.”

His voice rose. “But I’m not straight.”

“Shall we explore that further? Do you have more questions?”

“How could a guy get all the way to twenty-five and not know he’s gay?”

“I have friends who were in their forties before they knew for sure. Married, kids, the whole scenario.”

“Man, that seems like a waste.”

Shaz snorted. “Somehow that’s not the response I expected.”

“Well, hell, I know up close and personal how crappy it is to have sex when you’re not really into it. I wouldn’t want to keep that up for another twenty years.”

Shaz put down his beer and draped an arm over the back of the couch facing Billy. “So you’re thinking that having gay sex will be better?”

“I sure as hell hope so.” Once again, not the most romantic answer.

Shaz cocked his head. “And you’re thinking I should be your experiment in gay sex?”

Whew
. “It’s not exactly like that. I mean, I don’t have any experience, so it has to be an experiment. But—”
Wow.
This is hard
. He stared at his shoes. Very nice shoes. “—I think you’re more beautiful than any woman I ever saw. And any man too. I figure if I’m gonna try this, it should be with a guy I think is beyond hot, but I totally get if you think that’s a crappy reason.” He glanced up. Shaz was gazing at him with lazy green eyes that made his stomach flip. Billy stuttered. “I really like you too.”

In one move Shaz slid forward, grabbed Billy behind the neck, pulled him close, and closed his mouth over Billy’s lips.

He froze.
Oh God, it’s happening
.
Holy fucking shit
. In one second, he answered the question “What would it be like to kiss a guy?”
A little scratchy
. Shaz didn’t seem to have much beard, but what was there felt way different than a girl.
A lot soft
. Those lips. Sweet Jesus, he’d imagined they’d be soft, but this was far beyond. Like kissing satin or cotton candy or Yerby’s fur.
And hot. Oh my God, hot
. His lips parted and Shaz’s tongue slipped inside, exploring, tasting, and a little demanding. In one mind-altering flash, he knew. He’d never liked kissing one of the women he’d been engaged to. Never one. But this?
Oh yes
.

A vibration like a purr rumbled through his chest. He wrapped his arms around Shaz and pulled him closer, letting his tongue do battle, sliding and questing. Shaz made the noise this time. Like a moan. What a feeling. To make this guy moan. He pulled him even closer. Suddenly Shaz scrambled over his lap until he was sitting with his crotch pressed against Billy’s. Still kissing, he began a slow ride, rubbing his erection against Billy’s through way too many layers of cloth. Sweet God, it felt so good. He grabbed Shaz’s butt and pulled him tighter. The kiss broke as he clenched his teeth.
More. More
. His hips thrust up against his rider. Oh God, this was what he wanted.

Shaz ripped his head back. “Clothes. Get them off.” He scrambled off Billy, toed off his shoes, pulled down his trousers, and had his bright purple briefs sailing through the air before Billy got his belt unfastened. Shaz knelt, grabbed Billy’s shoes and bounced them on the floor, then started pulling at his pants. Billy slid the briefs off and pushed down as Shaz pulled.
Success!
The whole package crumpled to the floor.

For an instant Billy got to focus on what that more-than ample Shaz cock looked like erect and pressed against his taut belly; then Shaz was back on him, straddling and shoving their two upright dicks as tight against each other as physics allowed. Shaz tilted Billy’s chin up so he was staring into those green eyes. Then he pushed his hips forward and started rubbing against Billy’s belly with his own. Their cocks, caught between their two bodies, were the fuel for the fire, baby.

Shaz gasped. “Feel good?”

“Yeah.” Billy’s breath came so hard he sounded in pain.

“This is one of the many things you can do with cocks.” He leaned forward until his breath poured into Billy’s ear. “I want to show you all of them. You make me crazy with your beautiful eyes and your gorgeous body and your sweet heart. I want to eat you and fuck you and eat you some more. But right now I want you to go nuts.”

Shaz stretched out his legs until his body lay almost full-length against Billy’s. With his hands anchored on the couch, and never losing eye contact, he slid them together with a friction so intense Billy’s head wanted to explode. “Shit, Shaz. Oh God, that’s it. So great, so great.”

He rode and rode, making noises that sounded totally like a guy. Grunts and moans. Friction caused fire, and Billy was going up in flames.

Shaz pressed his lips against Billy’s forehead for a second. “I’m so hot I may turn to ash. All night long I watched that ass of yours wagging around that ballroom, and all I could think of was how I wanted to grab it.” He reached behind Billy and pressed his fingers into Billy’s steaming buns, then slid his cock against Billy’s so hard it felt like two firebrands dancing. “But not just grab. I wanted to bite it, lick it, fuck it. I wanted to own it.” On every word he gave another powerful thrust, and flashes of fire leaped from Billy’s cock into his balls.

“Shit, Shaz, this ass is yours if you just don’t stop.”

“Never?”

“Never. It feels too good.”

Shaz stared into his eyes, but he could barely see him. Lightning seared across his vision in bolts of white.

“Ready to come, my knight?”

“Oh shit, yeah. I’m not sure I can live through it. Oh shiiiiit.” Shaz gave one big thrust.
Combustion!
The spurts of cum pouring out of Billy’s cock couldn’t begin to put out the fire. Bright white, then pitch black. Had he passed out? His head blew apart like a big bang full of stars and he didn’t care if he died.

Shaz cried out. Loud. Who cared if the neighbors heard? Billy Ballew had made the most gorgeous man on earth come. Cause for celebration.

Shaz’s body went from rigid to collapsed but didn’t change position lying on Billy. Their hearts beat together like a couple of jackhammers.

Billy took a breath, and it caught and trembled out of his chest. “Oh God, I am gay. I am.” He wanted to laugh. He wanted to cry.

Shaz’s soft high voice sounded muffled against his chest. “Yes, dear. I think you are.”

“What does that mean?”

“We’ll find out. Don’t worry. It’s better to know.”

When his heart stopped hammering—would it still be better?

B
ILLY
WOKE
up—alone. If you didn’t count two cats staring intently at his face from three inches away. Six-thirty call on the new house they had to have finished by the end of the month. Shaz had said he also had an early appointment and couldn’t show up in his suit. He’d probably figured Billy wasn’t ready to spend the night with a guy. Hell, it might have been better than too much thinking time.

He turned over and extended a hand. A furry head pressed against it. “Good morning, guys.”

“Merwaorwr.” Yerby demanded food.

“So I guess you two must have known about me all along, right? You knew I was gay too or you wouldn’t have stuck around so long.” He sighed. “At least you like me for it.”

Take stock
. No doubt about it. He’d never felt this good. His cock lay there like a happy cat in the sunshine.
Face it. This is what you’ve wanted all along
. Then why did he feel like crying?

He sat up and dropped his legs over the side of the bed. He wasn’t who he thought he was. He’d been living a fucking lie and now needed a whole new life. It was like starting over. No, not like. It
was
starting over.

He glanced at the clock. And he’d better get on with it.

He stood up and stretched. He felt wonderful. When was the last time he had an orgasm like that? He stared down at his cock stretching its morning wood.
Mr. Happy
. If you didn’t count the blow job from Shaz, which had been the best until then, the answer was never. That felt really sad.