Just a Memory (25 page)

Carolyn studied the picture, trying to find some explanation. Looking at their marriage from his perspective, she suddenly saw something she'd never even guessed at before. It would explain his eagerness for her to get the store going on a solid income basis so quickly. It would explain why Richard seemed less than ecstatic when she'd discovered she was pregnant.

Richard must have known he was ill long before he'd told her.

Carolyn pressed her lips between her teeth. Tears welled in her eyes. Yes. That had to be the explanation. He'd been worried about how she would manage without his income, and then more worried when he knew she would be a single mother. He'd tried to prepare a way she and Terri would have a chance at a life in Lakehaven without him.

"Richard, I didn't know," she cried, the tears falling from her cheeks onto the glass of the framed picture she held. "I never guessed until now. Why didn't you tell me?"

In that moment she realized how deeply she'd resented the desertion she felt at his death. "I'm sorry, Richard," she whispered. "I know you didn't choose to die."

She slumped over the dresser. The photo slipped from her fingers as the sobs shook her body. But slowly, the tears subsided and she straightened. Wiping her cheeks, she looked around the bedroom in which she'd made love with Mac. She hadn't given a thought to the fact that she'd shared this room with Richard first. Shared the same bed with him. Not one thought. When Mac walked through that door with his hand in hers, it was as if Richard had never been there. She looked again at the frown in the photo. Maybe he never had been.

"Thank you, Richard. You gave me Terri and for that I will forever be grateful. But it's time I said goodbye and got on with my life to whatever is in store for me. I truly believe you wanted me to."

She returned the photo to the bottom of the drawer. She studied the plain gold band on her left hand for a moment and then pulled it from her finger. She wrapped the ring in a lace handkerchief she'd carried at her wedding. It was pretty to look at though not at all useful–until now. Carolyn set the ring in the drawer under the frame. Someday she would give it to Terri as a memento from her father.

Carolyn pulled the sweaters back over the photo and the ring, straightened the piles, and shut the drawer on her past.

Mac drove home and unintentionally woke up Hines by making too much noise making a sandwich after his quick shower. While he ate, Mac filled Hines in on what Manny had told him and then they both caught a few hours sleep before the alarm went off. Mac's thoughts were all of Carolyn as he rapidly fell asleep. As the crime seemed to be nearing a solution for him in Lakehaven, Mac's subconscious mind reached back months to the one crime that tormented him most.

The light herbal fragrance he remembered from Carolyn's hair was replaced by the damp, moldy smell of the loading docks. Instead of the feel of her soft warm body under his fingertips, Mac was suddenly clinging to his sliver-laden perch on the wooden crates while he watched with horror as the murder of his partner played out below him.

"No-o-o!" Mac cried out into the night as his nightmare unfolded. He flipped onto his back as if he'd been shot again. In pain that felt real, his head rolled quickly from side to side on the pillow. "I can't see, Sam.
No!
"

Wrenched from his nightmare, Mac sat up and fought to catch his breath. Hines came running to the room this time and stood in the doorway. "You okay, Mac? You were louder than usual. I thought…" Hines shrugged.

"Oh, God." Mac fell back on the bed and rubbed his hands over his face to wipe away the memory of the nightmare. "It's playing over and over again like an old movie. There must be something there I'm supposed to see. Damn it!"

"I wonder what triggered it tonight. You said you haven't been having them lately."

"No, not since… I don't know. Maybe it was talking to Manny." Mac straightened the sheets and blankets with a vengeance. "Whatever it is, if I don't figure it out soon, I'll go crazy."

He punched the pillow so hard it was a wonder the feathers didn't fly out just to get away from his fist.

"You're working on a Sunday?" At five to nine the next morning, Carolyn was surprised to see Ellie at her desk.

Ellie shrugged and smiled. "I don't mind and the Chief wanted a female officer on hand. You can go right into his office," she said.

"Mavis is already in there?"

Ellie nodded. Carolyn thanked her and headed for the open door. She was nervous, not because she was about to hear who had vandalized her shop, but because she would see Mac again. This was the 'morning after.' She had no more time to wonder how to handle the situation–one she'd never been in before–when Mac looked up to greet her with a smile that made her heart speed up.

She smiled back and felt her cheeks grow warm. She felt as if a neon sign saying 'I loved making wonderfully passionate love with you last night' was plastered to her forehead for everyone to see.

She noticed he stood next to where Mavis was seated. Mac looked almost helpless standing there with a box of tissues in his hand. Mavis took one of them and wiped her tears and nose. The crumpled tissue joined a pile of others on her lap.

"Carolyn. Come in," Mac said, relief reflected in his voice. "Sit down. Ms. Ashton was just filling me in on what's going on."

Carolyn walked directly to the chair next to Mavis and sat down facing her. She was immediately concerned for the obviously distressed condition of the older woman. "Mavis, what is it? What has you so upset? Please tell me."

Mavis burst into fresh tears. "Oh, Carolyn, I didn't know what to do. He said we would go to
Arizona
and live out our remaining years together. He said he just had a few things to take care of first. Now he's been putting off leaving together for weeks."

Mac interrupted. "Ms. Ashton, who is it? Who told you those things?"

She continued talking directly to Carolyn as if Mac hadn't spoken at all. "I'm so embarrassed. I'm just an old fool. I go my whole life without believing what men tell me. I'm certainly old enough to know better and look what happens. Men. You just can never believe what men say."

Carolyn glanced up at Mac. A frown ruffled his forehead. She turned back to the woman beside her. "Mavis, no. Don't think that. That's not true. Please, just tell us who did it. Who broke into my store?"

Mavis wasn't listening to either of them. She shook her head. Her shaking fingers ripped apart the tissue she held. "Don't ever believe what a man tells you, Carolyn. They just take what they want and then they run. Then you're…you're left all alone," she wailed. Mac handed her yet another tissue and she blew her nose.

Carolyn didn't want to believe what Mavis said about men. There was so much she didn't know about Mac. Some of what she knew she didn't want to remember–like the fact that eventually he would be leaving Lakehaven.

"And then last night," Mavis continued when she'd recovered a bit, "he came over like he usually does on Saturday nights, but he wasn't himself. I asked what was wrong and he finally said he had things to tell me. He said after I heard them, I could make up my mind about still wanting to go with him to
Arizona
. He was upset because he messed up your shop. He's feeling so bad about it. It's just eating him up inside." Mavis sniffed daintily in her Victorian lady-like fashion. "I told him if he just came to you and told you what he'd done, that you would try to understand."

Carolyn patted her arm. "Of course, Mavis. Just tell me who it is and I'll talk to him. We can get this whole thing straightened out."

Mac nodded from behind Mavis's back to encourage Carolyn. She was doing great, just like a partner.

Partner! The word hit him like a shot.

In the instant he thought it, his nightmare flashed back. Only it was different this time. He turned away from Sam and looked in the direction Sam was pointing. Someone was standing there who shouldn't have been there. The figure on the dock was facing the warehouse without any fear of being shot. The figure had the gun and was shooting! He shot Sam, and Mac watched as the barrel swung toward him. It was aimed right at Mac's chest. He tried to lunge away to the side.

Mac twisted and his thigh hit the desk hard as Carolyn's voice finally registered.

"Mac? Chief Macdonald?" She smiled warily when she felt she had his attention. "Mavis is going to call him now from here. He said he would meet her at my store. I told her we can go over there. Is that okay?"

He nodded.

"Would you like to freshen up a bit before we go?" Carolyn asked of Mavis.

Mac saw his opportunity for a moment to explain his lapse in concentration and walked over to the intercom without waiting for Mavis's answer. "Ellie, would you step in here, please?" He turned back to Mavis. "Ellie will show you to the ladies' room, Ms. Ashton."

Carolyn offered her arm to help Mavis up. "A little cold water will feel good on your face. This will all work out in the end, you'll see."

"Thank you, my dear. I just don't know how he could have done it. You've always been so nice whenever you've come into my office. So nice."

After Ellie took Mavis by the arm to lead her out and closed the door, Mac sank back on the edge of the desk. He ran a hand through his hair.

"I'm sorry, Caro. My memory was playing tricks with me just then. There's been something that I've been trying to remember for some time. It's got to do with a case back in the city. Something I'm still looking for and I had a flash of what it might be."

Shaking his head to free himself from the troubling thoughts, he looked up to meet Carolyn's gaze. He opened his arms to her. She crossed the short space between them, surrounding his waist with her arms as he rose.

The buzz of the intercom separated them a few minutes later when Ellie announced that Mavis was ready to leave.

"Mavis would feel better riding with you than in a police car with me. Is that okay, Carolyn? I'll follow you over there."

"Fine. Her mystery man should be there soon."

Arriving at The Costume Nook just a few blocks away through the downtown shopping district, Carolyn noticed an old pickup in the parking area.

"Oh, he got here ahead of us," Mavis told her. She turned in her seat and laid her hand on Carolyn's arm. "Please, Carolyn, don't be angry with him."

Carolyn was wide-eyed and open-mouthed with surprise by the time Mac got out of his car, which he parked behind hers. He opened the door for Mavis who murmured her appreciation. Carolyn got out on her side and walked to the truck door. She opened it, knowing the face looking down sheepishly at her. "Charlie? Charlie, it was
you?
"

Charlie climbed down out of the truck as the words tumbled out with his apologies and broken explanations. His white hair looked unkempt. His clothes, which were always clean though worn, looked as if he'd lived in them for days. On top of his ramblings, Mavis was pleading for Carolyn to understand why Charlie did it. Her hands clutched at Carolyn's coat sleeve.

Mac managed finally to get everyone into the store. Charlie turned back to Carolyn and went back to his explanation. "I had to do something, Carolyn. You've always been so nice. You have a kind word whenever I stop here, not like some places where I work. And you never let me pay you for the mending you did for me."

"It wasn't anything. I was happy to do it for you."

"Well, I wanted to repay you. You work so many evenings here after it's dark and that back door just wasn't safe. I worried about you and that cute little tyke of yours."

Carolyn patted his hand. "I know you meant well."

"But he broke the law," Mac interjected in a low deliberate voice that commanded attention.