Read Jake's Women (Wizards) Online
Authors: John Booth
“Retnor’s back!” Jenny said as soon as I arrived in her room. “He wants to see you when you get a spare moment. And your parents want you to ring your Aunt May. She was the one at the wedding with the sour face, wasn’t she?”
I waved a hand in acknowledgement of the requests. They would all have to wait. I needed to spend time with my wives and children, starting with Jenny and Merlin.
“I’m safe. The Progenitors are bound by their own stupid rules and can’t touch me.”
Jenny smiled and we were hugging. She squeezed my buttocks and I squeezed her back.
“Tonight,” she said in her
naughty
voice.
“Don’t we have to wait for your bits to settle?” I do not claim to be an expert on a woman’s anatomy after childbirth, but I was sure I’d read that somewhere.
She stood on tiptoe to whisper in my ear.
“I’m sure we can find other things to do. I have a few ideas.”
I grinned. I could think of a few things myself.
Jenny and I sat in the Owen’s lounge with Mr. Owen while Mrs. Owen cooked dinner. We had all made offers to help, but she wouldn’t hear of it. Merlin was in his carrycot next to Jenny and I was watching him trying to manipulate magic fields. He had a perfect blue sheen around him. Not a trace of orange that would have indicated illness. I was fascinated by the interplay of magical forces in front of his hands.
Despite the sure knowledge that I must be wrong, it looked as though the magic was playing with him. Merlin pulled at the flow of magic and it swirled out of his way as if teasing him. The link to his half-sister swirled through all the colors of the rainbow and I wondered if they were communicating.
“Dinner is served,” Mrs. Owen called.
Merlin started crying and Jenny rushed to pick him up and offer him her breast, which he took immediately and settled down.
We made our way to the dining room where a large beef joint awaited us with all the trimmings. Jenny was a good cook, but the truth was her mother was better.
When we were well into our meal Mr. Owens asked a question. I had a feeling he’d been saving it up all day.
“When will you rescue Bronwyn? Brian and Gwyneth are going mad with worry.”
“Dad,” Jenny protested. Mrs. Owens looked upset.
“Bronwyn is quite capable of rescuing herself,” I explained. “That she hasn’t come to us means she has a good reason to stay where she is.”
“She wants to get her powers back?” Mr. Owens asked. “Do you think she will become evil again?”
A good question, but not quite accurate. Jenny saved me from trying to find an appropriate answer.
“Bronwyn was never evil. Things happened to her you can’t understand, Dad.”
“Absolute power corrupts absolutely,” Mrs. Owens said firmly. “No child can handle such power without going mad.”
Jenny gave her a severe look, her eyes flashing from her mother to me.
“Present company excepted, of course,” Mrs. Owens said. Though I’m not sure she believed her words.
“Is she old enough to make those sorts of decisions?” Mr. Owens continued. “Shouldn’t you go and talk to her? Give her advice.”
Bronwyn had never taken my advice. In fact she tended to do the opposite of whatever I suggested. What I said was:
“Only she can assess her situation. The Cult thinks she is a god. They won’t hurt her.”
“But will they corrupt her?” Mr. Owen pressed.
I shrugged. Only time would tell.
After dinner, Jenny suggested we get an early night. Given Merlin’s feeding schedule it was likely to be an interrupted one. We retired, Jenny putting Merlin into the cot by our bed and then carefully bolted the bedroom door.
“You’re not getting out of here till I’ve had my evil way with you,” she said, adding a cackle and rubbing her hands together.
“Isn’t that supposed to be my line?”
“Not another word or I’m getting out the handcuffs.”
Well, what could I say to that?
It was five o’clock in the morning and I was exhausted. Despite Jenny’s best efforts my manhood refused to wake up for one last time.
“Do we have a safe-word?” I asked.
“Quitter.”
That sounded appropriate, but I think she was getting the message without me having to say it.
Jenny gave up and moved up the bed to lie next to me.
“I thought you went to a convent school?” I asked. Some of the things she’d done had taken me by surprise.
“Where do you think I learnt all that?”
“You must never speak of these things to Esmeralda.” I was serious. Esmeralda was highly competitive wife-wise and might do me a serious injury if she tried some of the things Jenny had performed so ably.
Jenny tittered. “Too late. It was all we talked about the last few weeks, when we were alone together.”
I offered up a profanity and Jenny thumped me on the chest.
“Not in front of the children.”
I looked at Merlin and saw the link to his sister was pulsing.
Children
might be exactly the right word.
After breakfast I kissed Jenny and Merlin and hopped to Salice. Salice and Wales are more or less in the same time zone so I arrived to find Esmeralda eating breakfast in her room with Morgana in a cot beside her. Her parents were there as well.
“It’s good to see you, Jake,” King Petre said, rising from his chair. “Have you resolved your differences with the Progenitors?”
“Apparently, I am safe. I am told they are bound by their own rules and the Valhallans are helping me for their own benefit.”
The King chuckled. “They never do anything for any other reason.”
Queen Janti smiled. “Then if you are safe and present no danger to us, you may partake of breakfast.”
“I do not think being near Jake is ever completely safe.” That’s my wife, always there with the caustic comment. “Are you prepared to tell me now how Jennifer knew I was in trouble?”
“My children have linked themselves together. Probably when the two of you were busy discussing methods of sexual congress after recent birth.”
Queen Janti blushed and Petre coughed in distress. Esmeralda’s smile never faltered.
“Morgana and Merlin are communicating? How is that possible?”
“It’s like the link between Jenny and Fluf-Retnor. It goes through hop space so distance is no object.”
“Will you not eat?” Janti asked.
“I’m afraid I’ve already eaten at Jenny’s parents.”
Esmeralda eyes glinted. I am prepared to swear she can light them up when she wants to.
“You spent the night with Jenny?”
Oh no. Competition alert. Competition alert.
The King coughed again. “I think we should leave husband and wife to get reacquainted.”
Janti stood up and the two made to leave the room. Janti pulled me aside and I bent to listen to her whisper.
“You might need to use the paddle. Esmeralda looks angry.”
I figured that hopping might prove a better defense, but I nodded to her as the King ushered his wife from the room.
Esmeralda had adopted a pose I knew only too well. Arms crossed and right foot tapping ominously.
“And how did the subject of sexual relations come up with Jennifer?”
“I can’t remember.” Go on, sue me for the terrible response. My mind often goes blank when I face Esmeralda.
“It would not have been after she had demonstrated those techniques, would it?”
I should wear a veil, because my face is an open book where Esmeralda is concerned.
“How many times did you do it together?”
“Err… once?”
“Six times, at least,” Esmeralda snapped. “Well take off your clothes. You are not going anywhere until we have matched her.”
“It was only four.” ‘
Please God, I couldn’t do six’
“Too late for your lies, Jake Morrissey. Get your magic wand out this instant.”
It was only Morgana crying to be fed that ended the session. Esmeralda jumped out of bed to reach for our baby. I rolled onto the floor, a whimpering wreck, and struggled to find my jeans. They were torn and it took a few moments to summon the magical energy to fix them.
As I slipped on my tee-shirt Esmeralda turned to face me.
“You may go, as you seem to have developed a limp. But this is not over. I will not play second best to anyone. Next time, come here first.”
“I don’t believe I will be able to come anywhere ever again.”
Esmeralda smiled. Her smile often has a feral look, like a tiger about to eat its prey.
“Did I miss out any of Jennifer’s techniques?”
It was going to cost me, but I figured it was worth it.
“Actually, there was one where she used her tongue in a really special way.”
I hopped, because hopping is always preferable to dying.
Retnor sniffed as I arrived in the Bat Cave. His thoughts were tinged with humor.
[Do humans think of nothing but sex?]
“Apparently my wives don’t. I see you got out of the Conference with your skin intact.”
My dragon was looking particularly resplendent. His iridescent orange and green scales glistened in the sunlight streaming in through the cave mouth. It looked as though he had just come back from hunting, judging by the wool stuck in his teeth. He noticed my gaze.
[Welsh sheep always end up stuck in my teeth unless I roast them severely first. You humans should breed them to be shorthairs.]
“I’ll have a word with the local hill farmers.”
[I wish you would,] my dragon replied, totally missing the sarcasm. Or maybe he was just ignoring it.
“How did my escape go down?”
[I think the human expression is
like a lead balloon
. At least a dozen Representatives were trying to smash into your coffin when you vanished. Then they milled around like soldiers who had lost their officer. It was quite a long time later that the alarms went off and we were confined to our individual spaces. Yesterday, the Progenitors announced that the conference was cancelled and we were to be sent home.]
While Retnor had been rambling I had been searching his head for a tracer so I could remove it. What I found was something much more complicated. The tracer in his head was designed to recognize my presence and was currently screaming our location out into hop space.
I cut it off in mid scream and placed a shield around myself to prevent anyone teleporting me. It didn’t work, as I was promptly wrenched out of the space-time continuum.
Imagine a net towing a ball on a long tether across the surface of the Earth from a jet fighter. That was what it felt like. My shield had prevented them from pulling me fully into hop space, but I wasn’t in the real world either. I was in somewhere between the two, and me and my shield were being dragged across whatever was in this place.
At first, all I could do was hold on and keep the shield intact. The buffeting was too violent for me to think. As moments stretched into minutes I got used to it enough to try and formulate a plan of action. The first part of that plan was simple enough. I had to break the line holding me so I wouldn’t end up with the Progenitors. Then I would figure out what to do next.
I extended my senses out along their line. It was no kind of conventional magic, looking more like a computer program than a spell. It was being constantly renewed from its source, which is all that was keeping hold of me. If I broke the communication link the line would dissipate almost immediately. The thought is the mother of the deed and I put my metaphorical finger in the data stream. I didn’t stop the data getting through, but I scrambled it hopelessly. The link broke and my spherical shield went bouncing across the surface of wherever I was like a stone skimming over water.
It turned out that was a more accurate metaphor than I thought. When the shield bounced to stop it sank through the surface, taking me with it.
There was light and I had to shield my eyes from its brightness. Something that looked suspiciously like a glowing white horse with wings started to fly away. Its light diminished enough for me to see my surroundings. I was on a small hill covered in long grasses. The whole world seemed to be moving and when I stood up I discovered the hill was floating in the air. Similar bodies of various sizes were floating about above and below me. As I watched in astonishment, two of them hit, breaking up into at least six pieces, all of which floated away in various directions.
The light appeared to be coming from multiple sources and from all directions including below. My shadow vanished as the source of light that had early blinded me dropped in intensity to the point where it couldn’t be distinguished from all the others.
Something not remotely human placed an appendage on my shoulder. As I turned in fright I felt information flow into me and maybe some flowing the other way. What I saw was a grasshopper, much the same size as me.
[Welcome Jake Morrissey of Humanity. Welcome to the Damaged Zone.]
No mouth parts moved as it spoke to my mind. I was glad about that as the mouth parts looked particularly nasty.
“You have me at a disadvantage.” That was an understatement.
[No, I have passed you the information. You have simply not absorbed it yet.]
“Where is this place and how does all this stuff work?” I waved a hand at the floating islands. I’d never been to a place where physical laws were completely ignored.
[I have already told you. This is the Damaged Zone. You knew of it before you came here. This is what remains of the universes the Diabli destroyed with their weapons of war.]
I continued to look confused and the giant grasshopper must have sensed it.
[Each universe has a set of physical laws; most are the same, as only some laws allow the development of complexity. Complexity and intelligences such as you and I. The Diabli weapons cut through the fabric between the universes and as a result all physical laws broke down. But living things hold a template of their universe in their heads and living things cling tenaciously to life, so we have clumps of rules held together by the life inside them. Do you see?]
I did, sort of. I’d have to spend more time thinking about it.
[You must leave here before the Diabli discover you. They seek a way back to the Multiverse and you know that way. I have already destroyed my memory of it. Some of us believe that their experiments have brought them close to penetrating the barrier between this place and the multiverse. Even knowledge of your existence here would be dangerous and I will destroy my memories of you when you leave. Flee this place now and never return.]
I looked up, though up in this case is another direction to the one we usually think of. I could see the surface of this universe. That meant I could escape.
“Thank you. I will leave immediately.”
[Good. And good luck to you, Jake Morrissey.]
The grasshopper changed into a massive butterfly and flapped its glorious iridescent wings to take off.
[Give my regards to the Dragons. I used to be one a long, long time ago.]
I watched it fly away.
Then I composed myself and travelled in a direction that was both up and not up. Breaking through the surface of existence I saw hop space glistening yet further above. It floated everywhere and nowhere all at once. I really don’t have the words to describe all the extra spatial dimensions I was seeing. I aimed at Hop Space and entered it.
Then I was back with Retnor.
[Where did you go?]
“Blocked an attempt by the Progenitors to kidnap me. They did it through a tracker on you, which I need to remove.”
Retnor watched closely as I eliminated the tracer in his skull.
[I will inform the Dragons. Any other constructs on them must be removed.]
“Ask them to explain it to the other races.”
Retnor nodded and I stroked his immense scaly hide.
“Got to go and see a girl about a letter.”
I hopped to Betty’s bedroom in Highfields Farm. Betty was waiting. As a human with Norn blood, Betty was capable of seeing the future in glimpses. That did not fully explain why she was lying on the bed with no clothes on and her legs spread wide. Not to mention a flushed look on her face.
“You’re late, lover. So I started without you. Get your clothes off; we haven’t got all day. I’ve got the milking to supervise in less than an hour.”
I groaned. Betty was my mistress with benefits. Refusing her was foolish, as each time we had sex she gave me new insights. It was one of her talents. Despite the battering it had taken, my manhood had risen to the occasion. It was a glutton for punishment was my manhood.