After remounting Navigator, Rudley returned to the high road and set a steady pace toward London. He stopped for dinner at Woking, having fasted since breakfast, and bespoke a room there for the night. He arrived in Cavendish Square the following day to find that Oliver was not in town but had gone down to Buckinghamshire to spend a few days with Lord and Lady Finley.
“I am going to bathe, Benson. When I come down, I would like some brandy in the library. If anyone should call, I am not at home.”
When Rudley announced the plans for his marriage, his aunt Helen had declared her intention to return to her cottage near Greenwich. At the same time Oliver offered to take rooms of his own in town, but Rudley rejected the idea. “Nonsense. Katherine and I plan to spend most of our time in Hampshire and you will oblige me by staying here. You know how much I dislike having the house empty.”
So Oliver had stayed on at Rudley House, but the earl was relieved to find him away from home on this occasion. He was not yet prepared to discuss his reasons for leaving the country, and it would be impossible to hide his distress from his intuitive brother.
For three days Rudley stayed alone at home, eating little and sleeping less. As a young man of twenty-two he had been overcome by despair when he learned of Arabella’s treachery. To a man in his position, the family, the title, the direct line of descent were paramount. He had carried a heavy burden of guilt for failing those generations of Seatons who had gone before him. It had been his responsibility to faithfully protect the line, and he had failed. The family honor had been compromised. He had not known what he would do if his wife bore a son. But Arabella had borne a daughter, and disaster had been averted.
Yet now he found himself facing the same impossible situation again. He had lived this nightmare before and knew from past experience that there was no solution to the problem now facing him. Yet he could not bid his mind be still, for this time fate had woven a subtle alteration into the fabric of his dilemma.
When Arabella had admitted her deceit to him, it had been an easy thing for his bitterness and disillusionment to override and destroy any tender feelings he had ever borne her. But with Katherine he was not to be so fortunate. She, like Arabella, had deceived him. Yet, beneath the fury in his mind and the pain in his heart, he could not deny he loved her still.
Oliver arrived in London late in the afternoon on Monday, and Benson greeted him at the door with profound relief. “His lordship is here, sir. He arrived Friday, from Hampshire.”
Oliver relinquished his hat, gloves, and whip into the man’s hands as he answered, “Is he? The Brents are back in town. No doubt he came up to collect Miss Stillwell.”
“His lordship has not been to the Brents’, sir. He has not gone out at all since he arrived. I am concerned for him. He says very little, and he has eaten almost nothing since he came. He sits hour after hour in the library drinking a bit too much brandy, if you don’t mind my saying so. Last night he never went to bed at all but just sat all night by the fire.”
“Where is he now, Benson?”
“Still there, sir, in the library, with strict orders that he is not to be disturbed.”
“Thank you, Benson. Try not to worry. I will see what I can do.” Oliver stepped across the hall and entered the library.
Rudley was standing by the windows that gave onto the square. He turned to face the door as Oliver entered, and Oliver saw at once that the butler was not exaggerating his brother’s condition. Rudley had not been shaved and his clothes certainly looked as if they had been slept in. He seemed thinner, and there were dark circles beneath his eyes. The eyes themselves were red-rimmed and bloodshot from a lack of sleep and an excess of alcohol.
Oliver crossed to his brother in a few long strides. He made no attempt to hide the concern in his voice when he said, “My God, Ned, what have you been doing to yourself? You look awful!”
Rudley ignored the question as he asked, “Did you find our sister and her husband well?”
“Well enough. What are you doing here? Is there some trouble between you and Katherine?”
The earl gave a short, scornful laugh. “That is certainly one way of putting it. Let us just say I have found it necessary to put some distance between my wife and myself.”
“Must we speak in riddles, Ned? Tell me what has happened, and perhaps there will be some way I can help.”
Rudley shook his head with finality. “No, dear brother, there is no way you can help this time, any more than you could the last. My wife, you see, has decided to do a repeat performance of Arabella’s marvelous pregnancy scene. It is to be my pleasure and privilege to receive, for the second time in my life, the gift of another man’s child to raise as my own.”
“What madness is this?” Oliver exclaimed in shocked disbelief. “Katherine’s child is yours!”
“So I believed. Until last Thursday, when I had the pleasure of meeting Katherine’s stepfather and learning from him of Katherine’s tryst with Parnaby in Lincolnshire in May.”
“Her stepfather? I thought she had no family aside from her sister.’’
“So did I. It seems that was not true.”
“But this is incredible! There must be some explanation. Katherine would not purposely deceive you! She is not at all like . . .” He broke off, unwilling to continue.
“Not at all like Arabella? A week ago I would have agreed with you. But it appears we have both been mistaken.”
“What explanation did she offer?”
“She said she was visiting Parnaby’s mother.”
“Perhaps she was.”
Rudley regarded his brother scornfully. “Katherine is not the forthright person we believed her to be. Do you know she kept a list of husband candidates when she first came to London? We were both on it.”
“What?”
“Truly. Although she told me she generously struck you off when she suspected you fancied Miss Harrington. She told me at the time that she needed to establish herself in order to make a home for her sister. As it turns out, she and her sister had a perfectly good home with their stepfather.”
“Then why was she so determined to marry?”
“She is in love with Parnaby, but he needed to marry a fortune. By marrying me she could safely be with him whenever the opportunity presented itself. She won’t be the first woman who married one man in order to safely carry on an
affaire
with another. I can tell you something else that will surprise you. Katherine was considering an offer from Lord Witford.”
“Witford!”
“My exact sentiments when I heard. Fool that I was, I played right into her hands by making an offer ten times as good as Witford’s. There is no way she would have refused me, yet she feigned reticence. I remember sitting up half the night, pondering just how to word my proposal in order to gain her acceptance.’’ He finished his brandy, then turned the empty glass between his fingers. “These past weeks, Oliver, I was convinced her love was equal to mine. But I realize now that she has never admitted loving me. Never said the words. Not even once.”
As Oliver sank into a chair, Rudley sat, too. “My God,” he said, “why did I ever sway from my resolve? I had sworn I would never again allow a woman any power over me, but I did. Why? Why did I do it?”
“Because you loved her. Running away does not help the situation, Ned.”
“Nothing helps,” Rudley returned.
There was a pause before Oliver asked, “Could the child be yours?”
“Yes. But it could also be Parnaby’s.”
“Did Katherine admit to intimacy with him?”
“No, but I did not expect her to. When her stepfather accused her, she denied nothing.”
“He said such things in your presence?”
“No. I overheard a conversation between them.”
‘‘Did you ask her yourself about her relationship with Parnaby?’’
“Yes. She answered my question with silence.”
‘‘Perhaps you hurt her simply by asking it. If she has been a faithful wife, Ned, such a question would be cruel.”
As Rudley reached for the brandy decanter once again, Oliver shoved it out of his reach. “Is this your solution?” he asked angrily. “To sit here and drink yourself into a stupor? You should go home and stay there until you have heard every word Katherine has to say.”
“I have heard enough. I will not go back. God help us all if this child should be a boy! It is too much to hope for another girl; not even I can expect such luck two times running.”
Rudley’s face was grim, and Oliver could see that three days and nights of dismal reflections had taken their toll both physically and mentally. If he continued much longer in this state, he was likely to make himself truly ill. Oliver strove for a lighter tone. “Enough of this incarceration of yours,” he said. “I am famished. We are going upstairs where you will shave and change and then we are going to dine at Watier’s.”
To Oliver’s surprise, Rudley raised no objection to this proposal and even made a fairly decent meal. Sharing his problem with his brother had seemed to lighten his burden. When they returned home soon after dinner, he went willingly to his bed and slept soundly until morning.
At breakfast Rudley announced his plans to post immediately into Yorkshire, where he had extensive property. “Kendall has been plaguing me for years to look into my holdings there. From what I understand, considerable work needs to be done, and I would like to keep myself occupied.”
“What of Katherine?” Oliver asked.
“She must do without me. I cannot go back, not now.”
“The Brents are back in town. That is why I thought you were here—to take Miss Stillwell home with you.”
Rudley sighed. “I had forgotten. Could you take her down?”
“Certainly. Would you object to my taking Charity Harrington as well?”
Rudley considered the suggestion. “Katherine spoke of having her come. It would certainly make my absence appear more natural. Why are we always plotting ways, dear brother, to keep our family wounds from bleeding in public? Surely. Take Miss Harrington if she will go, and fob the world off with the tale that I am detained by business in the north. If you would stay at Rudley Court yourself, you could do me a great service by helping Kendall to carry on the work we have started. There will be dozens of decisions to be made. I would be easier in my mind if I knew you were there to keep all running smoothly.”
“If Katherine is agreeable, I am convinced Miss Harrington’s parents will have no objection to her bearing her friend company, especially if they know you are to be absent for some time. You must write the letter though, Ned. To Katherine. I could not invite myself, nor Miss Harrington.”
Accordingly, Rudley composed a brief missive and sent it off immediately. He had no plans, however, to wait for a reply. Within a very short space of time he had completed all the arrangements for his trip north and was well on his way when his letter arrived at Rudley Court.
Katherine,
Oliver will be arriving shortly from the city to oversee the management of Rudley Court in my absence. He will be escorting your sister and has expressed his willingness to bring Miss Harrington should both you and she wish it. Please inform him as soon as possible of your decision. He will await your answer in London. I have enclosed a letter for Kendall, and you will oblige me by seeing that he receives it.
Rudley
Katherine had broken the seal of this letter with trembling hands, but its contents did nothing to lift her depression. She, like Rudley, had passed through days of emotional turmoil following his sudden departure. Again and again she had relived the horrible scene in her bedchamber. She could still see the anger, the pain in his eyes. She had never imagined that keeping her secret about Sir Humphrey would ever escalate into a disaster of such magnitude. One moment her life had been nearly perfect, then Sir Humphrey’s visit had brought everything crashing down about her head.
At first she had been shocked to think Rudley would suspect her of infidelity, but after she had time to view it from his perspective, she understood how he could doubt her. She should have told him about Sir Humphrey. She should have refused to ride with James, or at the very least told Ned about their meeting the moment she returned home. She should have denied Sir Humphrey’s accusations instead of retreating into angry silence.
And finally, and not the least of her mistakes, she should have burned the journal the moment she accepted Rudley’s proposal. Making such a list was not something she would normally do. She had devised it as a physical prop for an effort she had no stomach for. It had helped her to keep her goal in mind, to steel herself for a task repugnant to her.
She was heartsick to think she had destroyed Ned’s faith in her and driven him from his home. By the time his letter arrived, she had had enough solitary misery and welcomed the prospect of Serena’s homecoming and a visit from Charity. She prayed her husband would come back, but she knew he had meant his final words to her. He was not the man to speak in exaggeration or idle threat. He had said he could not forgive her, and she didn’t know if there was anything she could ever do to restore the trust they had lost.
Rudley’s precipitate departure for town had left Kendall with the entire responsibility for the estate resting on his shoulders. Although he was a competent secretary, he had no power to make many of the decisions that had to be made on a daily basis. He and Rudley had taken on a great many new projects, and he was doing his best—within the limits of his authority—to keep things progressing smoothly. He was, however, greatly relieved to receive the letter the earl had enclosed with his note to Katherine.
Kendall,
I have decided to take your advice and proceed immediately to my Yorkshire property. There can be no doubt my agent there is doing a poor job. I plan to spend a month or so putting things to rights and hiring competent people who I can trust to carry on when I leave. My brother Oliver will be arriving shortly to take over for me in the work we have started at Rudley Court. He stands in my place, by my authority, and all decisions will rest with him. If Lady Rudley should make any request of you, either for money or service, you will oblige me by granting it. I will keep you informed of my progress.
Rudley