Read Howl for Me Online

Authors: Lynn Red

Howl for Me (17 page)

“I didn’t mean it like that,” Damon said, rubbing his shoulder and wincing a little.

“Yeah, you did.”

Hunter popped open two beers and set one in front of Damon.

“You’re so caught up in everything,” he said, “that you can’t see reality an inch in front of your face. And I can’t really blame you. I mean, I get it. Since I met Cat, I really, really get it.”

“Yeah?” Damon asked, taking a long drink. “So, you like her?”

“She’s fuckin’ great, man. Of course I like her!” he started getting
really
excited. “We’ve spent like three days together, and I’m pretty sure... okay this is going to sound stupid, but I think she’s the one. Lily said that’s what it was like for you guys.”

“Yeah, I guess so,” Damon said, smiling fondly. “But... I mean, back on topic – the fight and everything. I don’t want you to do something you don’t want to do. I’d hate for you to feel pressured to help just because you happened to wander in to the middle of a big, giant shitfest. You thought you were coming to play some videogames and eat some wings, you know?”

“Look,” Hunter said. “There are a lot of things in life we can control, right? We can pick friends, we can pick who we run around with, pick what kind of car we drive. Right?”

“Yeah, sure,” Damon said.

“But we can’t pick our brothers. We can’t pick our parents, or where we’re from, or who we love, right?”

Damon smiled. “Yeah. I get the feeling I know where you’re going.”

“You probably do,” Hunter said. “But I’m going to say it, anyway, because I’m... a little bit drunk, and I want to.”

Damon took another long drink and kicked a chair out from under the table, signaling for Hunter to sit. They were both leaning on their elbows and staring at each other.

“Go right ahead,” Damon said.

“Yeah.” Hunter began. “I mean, yeah. Anyway,”

Hunter looked back and forth for a second, then grabbed Damon’s hand, like he was about to arm wrestle him.

“You know what? Fuck it. I’m just gonna say it. I love you like a brother. I love Lily like a sister, because of who you are to me, and I think Poko’s about the coolest thing I’ve ever seen. And... and Cat? I can’t get her out of my mind.”

Damon laughed, but he knew what Hunter was talking about. He just squeezed his friend’s hand and listened.

“My life is... There’s nothing in it without you guys.” Hunter continued. “I mean, sure, a job sanding stone, and riding motorcycles on the weekend in the desert, but without you guys, it’s nothing. You’re my brother... and now, you’re my alpha. You’re the leader of my pack – of my family. Why
wouldn’t
I be happy to fight for you?”

“Is it just that you feel obligated?” Damon asked. “Because sometimes, I feel like that. Like I’m not making my own decisions.”

Hunter stared straight into his eyes.

“No,” he said. “Not for a single fucking second. You know what else?”

Hunter paused for a drink, and then kept going.

“I know we’re going to win. I know that whatever this horrible, ancient evil is, it can’t stand up to us.”

“How?” Damon asked. “It’s older than... history, I guess.”

“Because,” Hunter said, “I’ve got you, and you’ve got me, and you’ve got Lily, and we’ve all got each other. And no matter what you think of him, Damon, your other brother? He’s... let me put it this way – when I was carrying him back to the back of Poko’s cave, he didn’t say anything, except how much he wanted to prove that he wasn’t as bad as you think.”

“That’s what Lily said,” Damon told him. “She’s... better than me.”

“No, she’s not. She’s just more forgiving. But, we both need to sleep. From the way Poko was talking, we don’t have long. And just so you know,” Hunter grabbed Damon’s shoulder. “I’m scared as hell, man. I’m not stupid. But, I know we can rely on each other. I want you to look at me, and say you believe in what you’re doing. Tell me you believe we can win, because right now, I need that, and so do you.”

Damon finished his beer, and when Hunter squeezed his hand again, he stared him right in the face. For a second, he paused, considering what he was going to say. Then, he decided to stop thinking.

“Yeah,” Damon said. “We got this. You, me, and Lily? Even Devin? Poko somewhere in the background, doing whatever he does? The spirits, howling? Yeah, we can do it.”

Even as he said the words, Damon felt his heart start to believe them.

-16-

––––––––

D
evin put his hands up the second I approached him.

“Again?” he said. “I don’t want... I don’t want to relive all of this. It hurts.”

Poko nodded to me.

“It is necessary, young one,” Poko said. “We must find the Blight before he’s upon us. As we spoke when Lily was gone, this is the way you show your courage. Your actions before now were only partly of your doing. You reliving them, and helping to lead us to Jacarth – that will be your coming of age as alpha of the Carak.”

“But, Poko,” Devin said. “It’s my whole life. Lily knows everything about me, things I’ve never told anyone.”

“So, she does,” Poko said, turning to me. “Have you spoken of them?”

I shook my head. “No, of course not. I won’t, either. I told Damon that that you didn’t rape Cat. You almost tore yourself apart trying to keep her safe. That’s all I said.”

Devin looked at the ground and chewed on his lip. The way the light from Poko’s fire bounced off his hair, he was striking. The scars on his cheeks were white in the flame.

He looked back at me, staring straight into my eyes. The pale yellow in his irises almost wept with the pain that I knew he felt. He swallowed, hard. “Okay,” he said softly. “I’m ready.”

Devin intercepted my hand when I was about to cover his eyes to enter his memory. He held me there for a second.

“Anything you see in there... I’m not proud of any of it,” he said.

There was mist in his eyes.

“I’m not proud of anything – not a single thing – that I’ve ever done, until...”

“It’s okay,” I whispered. “Damon forgives you.”

It was a little shred of a lie, but not much of one. I knew when it was all over with, Damon would come around. He always did.

“Really? My brother cares about me?”

He looked like he was about to fall apart. His voice got a little thick.

“I don’t deserve it. I deserve for him... for all of you... to hate me.”

“No,” I said. “No, you don’t. No one deserves that. Nothing that happened was your fault. Like Poko said, you came here, and you didn’t run when you had the chance. You could have shut me out, but you let me in. You two are more alike than you know.”

Devin sniffed and clenched his jaws. “Huh? Me and Damon?”

“He won’t let me see him cry, either.” I said, giving Devin half a smile. “Lay back, okay? I won’t hurt you, and I promise I won’t say anything to anyone about what I see.”

Devin closed his eyes and lay back against the cold, stone wall. But, instead of taking his hands away from mine, he kissed my palm, and then pressed my hands to my eyes. They were wet with tears.

“I might not let you
see
me cry,” he said, “but I’ll let you feel it.”

“It’s okay,” I whispered again. “Later on, we can talk about anything you want. Okay?”

He sniffed again.

“Thank you,” he said. “I... I don’t know if I’ve ever said that and meant it. But, what you’re doing means the world to me.”

“Shh,” I whispered, rubbing my thumbs in circles above Devin’s eyebrows.

Almost instantly, he was out.

I gasped, loudly, and felt myself pulled into him. Our souls joined, like they were being shoved through a really tiny sieve. I felt tightness, tension, and then finally electricity surged from my hands, all the way to my feet, igniting my entire being.

“Talk to me, Lily,” Poko said, shaking my shoulder. “Lily?”

“It’s starting,” I heard myself say, in the distance. “I see some kind of building – an old apartment, or something. Someone’s calling him.”

I felt Poko’s ancient hand on my neck.

“Stay with me, but stay, too, with him. You must find the Blight, Lily.”

“There’s... there’s fire,” I moaned, rocking back and forth.

“I’ll keep you safe,” I heard the old man say, but then, as I merged fully with Devin’s remembrances, his voice faded.

It wasn’t just a memory of fire. It
was
fire. His whole mind was flooded with heat, and panic, and fear, and horror. Screaming and smoke, and the feel of scorching hot metal against his skin, made me lurch and twist.

I – living, once again, in Devin’s memory – stumbled through a half-broken wooden door, bursting it from the hinges.

“Mom!” I shouted. “Where are you? What happened? Mom!”

Devin dropped the bag of groceries in his arms. Eggs clattered along the floor, and one of them exploded from the heat.

His screaming hurt his throat, and every time he breathed in, the smoke made my lungs burn.

“I’m here,” I heard, from off in the distance. “Back... in my... room...”

Devin was blinded by smoke. He couldn’t do anything but grope around in the burning heat, trying to find a way through. Strangely though, the way to the hotel room he shared with his mother, was boarded up.

“Where?” Devin called, in a ragged, almost hollow, voice. “I can’t see anything.”

“Back!”

The voice was barely audible, but it was there. “All the way back! Hurry! The ceiling, it’s...”

In another moment of singular fury, the kind I’d almost started growing accustomed to, Devin threw back his arms and screamed his rage. Hair exploded from his pores, his muscles swelled big and tight and hard, and he tore into the first boards blocking up the hallway.

I felt the pain in his fists, in his shoulders – the scorching agony of fire, burning away his fur, scarring his face – but still, he kept on.

“I’m,” he gasped, “I’m through. How far back? Which door?”

“Last... on the... left...”

Her voice was barely perceptible at the end, but the whimpering that followed was easy to hear. Shielding his face, Devin pushed forward, stumbled over a fallen, broken, still-burning timber.

Above him, a huge crack caught Devin’s attention. He shot his gaze upward just in time to see the ceiling split open. A support beam, big and heavy and burning, tumbled down on top of him.

“No!” Devin screamed. “No! My leg!”

He wrenched his ankle back and forth, but it was no good. The board fell across his left leg, pinning it to the ground. Devin clawed at his foot, almost like he was trying to rip it off. He tried to push against the giant log with his other leg, then with his arms, but he couldn’t get any leverage.

“Mom!” he shouted. “I’m trapped! I’m... I’m burning! I won’t leave you, though.”

Scrabbling against the ground, Devin managed to free one arm and pushed up. The board, lightening just a little as the flames burned through it, gave slightly.

“I’m... I’m getting out from under it,” Devin yelled. “I’m about to...”

“No you’re not,” a voice from above Devin, said.

And then, whoever was standing there kicked his arm out from underneath him and laughed as Devin’s chin cracked against the sagging floor.

“Let me up!” Devin shouted. “My mother... I have to—”

“You have to be quiet, pup.”

Devin looked up, mouth agape, at the figure in front of him. The feet were twisted claws, the legs, slate gray tree trunks. Whoever it was, his face was so far up that Devin couldn’t make out any details. All he could see were thick, white braids hanging down either side.

“I... who are you?” Devin asked.

“I am your destiny,” the voice boomed. “You were meant to be here, and I was meant to find you. You’ll bring me back... You’ll make me whole.”

“What?” Devin shielded his eyes from the fire. “You weren’t here a second ago. What’s going on?”

“You don’t know anything of your past, do you, pup?”

The huge, gray wolf-man put the heel of his clawed foot on the back of Devin’s neck, and pressed. “You’re... innocent, despite your string of crimes.”

For a moment, Devin scratched at the ground, struggling to get free.

“Stop,” the voice boomed. “You’ve no hope of getting away. I’ll make you a deal. Since you seem so ignorant, it shouldn’t be a problem for you.”

“What?” Devin cried out. “Save my Ma and me, and I’ll do anything!”

“You needn’t do very much at all,” the creature said, withdrawing its foot. “All I need is to look in your eyes.”

With no effort at all, the creature lifted Devin away from the ground, simply sliding the burning board off him. At once, all the pain stopped.

The burning, the blistered flesh, the scorching pain... It all just stopped.

“Look at my eyes, pup,” the monster said. “Look on me, now.”

Devin shook his head from side to side, unconsciously fighting the great beast that held him, helpless, like a baby. When he resisted, a flame licked the bottom of his foot.

“You’ll open your eyes, or I’ll let your mother burn, right where she lays. I’m eternal, child. I’ve no care for the lives of mortals.”

Devin’s opened his eyes, more out of shock, than anything. When he did, the fires around him were nothing, to the agony blasting through his brain.

“You... ah!” he cried. “You’re killing me! No!”

Every inch of Devin’s twelve-year-old body ached.

White heat burrowed through his skull, spreading like hellfire through his mind, then down his spine, and outward. Everywhere he had nerves, Devin hurt. He wrenched to the left, then the right, trying to get away from whatever it was holding him, from whatever awful force kept him off the ground.

“It feels good, pup! So good! You have no idea what a favor you’ve done! I won’t forget your kindness.”

“No!” Devin cried out, lifting his hands to his face. “No! I can’t! Stop! You’re killing me! You’re—”

Devin hit the ground with a heavy thump.

He was alone. And the ground was cold.

Before opening his eyes again, Devin ran his hands along the ground. The wood was smooth, bubbled from the fire, but cool to the touch, like ancient, petrified wood.

He touched his face. The scars from his father’s torture were gone. The teeth he’d been missing since he was seven were right where they were supposed to be.

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