How to Give Her Absolute Pleasure (18 page)

better access a woman’s G-spot (through the so-called ceiling, or
Rabbit Pearl

G-Spot Vibrator
. This vibrator is

tummy, side of her vaginal wall). Dildo harnesses are much more shaped with an adjustable curving

popular than you might believe. A harness allows for either partner arch so it better reaches the G-spot. Women who love having to be the penetrating or “top” partner. Some men love the novelty of their G-spot stimulated say they love this style of vibrator.

“having my lady strap on some bad leather and do me with a cock harness like I do her”—as a graphic artist from Chicago said. For some couples, the man will wear a harness so he can perform double penetration on his lady. One said, “I can’t describe the sensation of my cock inside her and the other ‘cock’ up her butt. It was mind-blowing. And she gets off on feeling so filled.”

One particular toy that utilizes a dildo harness quite efficiently is the Accommodator, which is essentially a dildo that protrudes from your chin. I know, it looks very unusual, but believe me, your lover may thank you forever. The Accommodator’“ is based on the requirement of certain ladies for a form of penetration in order to orgasm during oral sex. As a result, the original design for the Accommodator” came from eighteenth-century France as an attempt to “improve on nature.” In other words, if a man wanted to please a
Cyberskin Cock and Clit Tickler

G-Spot Vibrator

woman using his tongue, he could also penetrate her with the Accommodator. This frees up a man’s hands and tongue to give his woman pleasure while also “handling” the penetration issue. I admit that when someone tries this on, it is one of the funniest moments of the gentlemen’s seminars. You can only imagine the number of times someone shouts “Dick head!” Yet the men who have actually had Openmirrors.com

the courage to try it said there was

Those recommended in the men’s seminars are made of soft, flexible no feeling of being restricted or

material, not hard metal.

binding from the chin or head

straps and that the dildo section

stayed in place at the end of their

1. To be most effective, you or your partner can apply a light chin . . . just where they wanted it.

lubricant on the ring and your penis. It’s best to use a water-One man recalled, “When I strap

based lubricant, as it will not break down the material the this on,

way oils/lotions will.

I imagine I am in that French

2. The most effective position for the ring is on the shaft and court and only I can do my girl the

underneath the scrotum. Placing it only on the shaft has some men reporting, “It was too tight just on the shaft, and way she likes.” The dildo section

The Accommodator

yet even though I thought the other way would be more of measures four inches long with

the same, oddly I felt more supported and ‘just right.” It’s five-inch girth. He can lie down and insert, or she can lower herself best that the gentleman does the final adjusting over the onto him when he is in the Sit on My Face (SOMF) position.

testicles.

3. The ring can be worn during manual stimulation by either Special Play Things

partner and/or during intercourse. Often couples will try the ring first during manual sex, and when they know what

works for them, they move to intercourse.

4. Some couples have reported they enjoyed either starting
(AKA THE CALAMARIS)

intercourse with a cock ring on and then removing it prior to Those men who enjoy the sensation of cock rings say it is because of climax or placing it on halfway through and finishing with it how they build up pressure. Cock rings are based on the law of in place.

hydraulics of an erect penis. Stimulation causes blood to flow in and 5. The scrotum and penis may be a much darker color when the fill the three penis chambers. Gravity and a decrease in stimulation ring is in place. That is natural, as the blood is pooled there.

cause the blood to flow back out. Cock rings

The ring should not be worn for longer than twenty to thirty reduce the drop-off of penile blood pressure

minutes without removing for a few minutes’ break.

by holding shut the veins, along the sides of

6. When you’re finished using the cock ring, simply wash with the erect penis, that allow the blood to flow

antibacterial soap and water and it will be ready for next out. When worn around the penis and under

time.

the scrotum, cock rings hold the scrotum

away from the body, thereby slowing down

SECRET FROM LOU’S ARCHIVES

ejaculation. These effects combine to result

The cock rings preferred by the field researchers are a soft,
Calamari

in a firmer, more long-lasting erection, and

flexible material, capable of stretching up to seven inches around.

some men report delays in ejaculation.

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SHAFT SLEEVES

(AKA THE RIGATONIS)

Like all great ideas, this one began small and then grew. Sportsheets These one-size-fits-all products are made of a very stretchy, soft, al were invented by a marine officer whose inspiration was watching most plush, rubberlike material that can be used on the penis or David Letterman attach himself to a wall of Velcro. He said to his fingers. The main idea behind them is that most

officer buddies in the mess, “Wouldn’t it be great if you could do manual stimulation is done with the fingertips,

that with your girlfriend?” The wife of one of the officers made and those tend to be soft and smooth. Shaft

sheets out of fabric and created Velcro attachment pads with cuffs, sleeves offer a new way to increase sensation in

and then they had a party to see if this would work. His comment those most delicate areas with a variety of soft-was, “We laughed our asses off,” and Sportsheets were born.

textured surfaces that are easily controlled with

Sportsheets are a kind of sex kit, made up of a very soft, plush, your fingers. Because of their expandable

yet durable velour-type sheet that fits a full up to a king-size bed.

nature, they can also be worn at the base of the

Four anchor pads that are attached to cuff straps anchor you or her to
Rigatoni

penis. In the seminars, men try them on in the

the sheet and the bed. The idea is that a woman (or a man) is secured palm of their hands and are always surprised

to the bed with the cuffs in whatever position one desires. Of course, by the softness of the sleeves. This versatile item can be used by the: you can increase the playfulness of sex without the more serious tone of other dominance and bondage (D&M) products. I call this move 1. Man on his partner—a boon to men. Now instead of relying the Boy Scout introduction to D&M, for women and men who want solely on your fingertips to stimulate your partner’s clitoral to test the waters of bondage in safety.

area, you have help in the form of these soft-textured

The fitted sheet is very soft and can be left in place on your bed.

sleeves. Just try one on the palm of your hand. Be sure to put The Velcro pads are not at all menacing. For women who like to be the lubricant on or you won’t get the real sensation. Men

“grounded,” this is the next best thing to being tied up!

have reported using two at a time so they can caress and pleasure both sides of the inner labia and clitoral ridge.

Women say, “He was good with his hands before, and now

he is amazing.” When used during intercourse, they are worn For the true bondage beginner, try using toilet tissue to give the at the base of the penis for deep, slow penetration. The soft feeling of being held hostage, with no real threat.

ripples and ridges are able to stimulate the lady. Works for both female-superior and male-superior positions.

2. Woman on her partner—slipped like a finger sleeve over one
SEX EXPERIENCE

or two fingertips. Some people report using two sleeves

While this product does not come cheap at $300, it may provide you covering different fingers. Apply a light amount of water-and yours with a truly new experience . . . just like the name says.

based lubricant and use your imagination.

Designed by a bungee enthusiast, it is essentially a modified bungee 3. Solo—perhaps the best way to discover the sensations jumping harness, made up of a series of straps that you hang from a possible with the different textures.

stud beam in the ceiling. A photo reference chart for the myriad positions is included in the package.

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With her cradled in the harness, you can penetrate her with no There are three ideas behind this toy. First, spreading the outer back or leg strain. Women and men like the weightlessness. This is labia often results in increased sensation, as the vulvar skin surface is the perfect addition to your playground—especially for those of you more taut and more available. Second, it avoids the tiredness that who like hammocks and swings. There’s something about the both men and women complain of in keeping the labia held open. As movement aspect that is exciting and pleasurable. As the one woman said of trying to hold herself open, “I try but I get so designer/inventor said, “Never again will you have a crick in your slippery I end up digging my nails into my inner lips and that hurts.”

neck.” (Be careful of your drywall. It’s best to check before Finally, it allows you to free up your hands to do other things.

anchoring or you’ll tear part of your ceiling out.)

For those of you who are familiar with a dildo harness, this toy is This is also a great way to give her oral sex. With a flick of your similar but there is no ring for a dildo. Again, this allows a man’s finger, you can move her around and never have to crane your neck hands to be free to be more creative. The product comes in three or move your head again.

colors—black, pink, and purple.

LICK-A-LOT-A-PUSS

The package on this product spells out its purpose pretty clearly (as For those ladies who enjoy anal stimulation, these are the two if its title alone didn’t do that for you): a “product for the hungry favorites. The sensation delivered for women is feeling more full, cunnilingus connoisseur.” This “labia spreader” is made of soft black and if intercourse is to take place, there is an even greater feeling of leather straps that you fasten around the upper thigh. Each side has a fullness. For men, the primary stimulation spot is the prostate gland.

little leather “hand” (the designer’s sense of humor showing through) Both toys require lots of lubrication, as the anal area is non-that holds the edge of the outer labia open. The lady can control the lubricating.

degree of openness merely by opening and closing her thighs.

Butt plugs are in essence a dildo for the anus but with a design adaptation of a flange at the base to ensure it does not fully enter the rectum. It is usually an inverted cone shape so that

once it is in, the strength of the sphincter holds it in place. (There are actually two anal sphincters. Only

one of the sphincters, the strong muscle ring that

keeps the anal opening closed, is under voluntary

control. The other is under involuntary control, so

try as you might, you can’t consciously relax it.

Therefore, in order to relax both sphincters, you

Butt Plug

need physical assistance. One man suggests

“inserting one finger for one minute, two fingers for two minutes.”

But remember to keep the fingers still—don’t move them.) Anal beads are plastic or metal balls on a string. All but one of
Lick a Lot of Puss

the beads are inserted into the anus, then pulled out before or at the moment of orgasm, as the PC muscle is undergoing orgasmic spasms Openmirrors.com

in the anus. “When it gets pulled out, I have another orgasmic wave,”

Resources

reported a thirty-seven-year-old woman from Beverly Hills.

(Where You Can Get t he T oys)

In collecting the best sources for toy products, I asked store owners Cardinal Toy Rules

several questions in order to verify their commitment to high quality and an open, encouraging attitude: Did they have a positive sex 1. You need to keep your toys clean. Wash in warm water and attitude? Would a woman be comfortable going into the store by an antibacterial soap before and after you use them.

herself or ordering over the phone? How big was its selection? Did 2. Use only water-based lubricants with any of your plastic-they sell their mailing list? Was their e-mail site secure?

compound items, as oil products, massage oil, and hand

Catalogs are a great, safe way to introduce tools into the lotion, for example, will start to break down the surface.

relationship. The very act of choosing a toy can be a bonding, 3. Use a condom on parts that are inserted. This makes cleanup intimate experience. It’s a gentle way to suggest what you’d like to a lot easier.

try. By looking at the pictures together, you and your partner can feel 4. Keep toys used for different areas, vaginal/anal, separate each other out about what may seem like fun, what may seem too from one another. If your lady likes anal penetration, don’t risky, and so on. Initially, making suggestions can make you and her use that dildo for her vagina, and so on.

feel vulnerable. Women especially fear being rejected. Remember, 5. Keep your toys in a safe place, away from dust and oils.

gentlemen, they don’t want to risk being perceived as “loose,” if they Toy-savvy types have one bag for vaginal toys and another suggest using a sex toy.