Hooked on the Game (The Sterling Shore Series #1) (20 page)

My finger hovers over the two options I have, but I wisely select
ignore
.  My heart settles heavily in my chest, exhausted from holding its pieces together.

I've heard there's a reason for everything that happens in life.  I've been searching for a reason for all this pain and madness.  Why would I fall so hard for a man I can never have?  But here it is.  This is why Kade and I met.  I was meant to do this.  Otherwise he would have possibly lost everything.  It's not closure, and it doesn't help alleviate the ache I feel, but it's nice to know that it wasn't for nothing.  Maybe that'll be good enough to help me move forward... one day.  Today's not that day.

Chapter 18

Running and Hiding

"Raya," Dane Sterling, the club owner, says from behind me.

"Yes, sir?" I ask, turning around to face the man the women in here drool over.

He's only twenty-something, but he owns a ton of Sterling Shore.  Which makes sense, considering he's related to the Sterlings - the ones who founded the city.  Oddly enough, he never seems to pay attention to all the women who adore him.  He's a lot like Kade - too busy with the future, I suppose.

"There are at least fifteen dozen roses for you at the front door.  You have to talk to the guy before he fills my club up."

My heart breaks a little.  Since Brody returned the vineyard to him two weeks, Kade has been doing his best to thank me.  He's called nonstop, hounded Ember for my address, and tried his best to catch me outside my classes.  Sadly, I've managed to start sneaking out windows at school.  Ember has refused to hand over my address.  But he managed to find out where I work, and he stalks me here more than anywhere else.

I always hide, the other girls lie and tell him I'm not here, and I work around it.  I even have the bouncer looking out for his car... or
cars
, rather.  But that doesn't stop him from sending heaps of flowers.

"Sorry, Mr. Sterling, but I really can't."

"
Dane
, Raya.  It's Dane.  I feel ninety when you call me
Mr. Sterling.
  I'm not that much older than you.  And you have to do something.  Otherwise, I'm going to have to kick his ass at some point."

The playfulness in his tone lets me know he's kidding, and I sigh out heavily.  He forces a sympathetic smile.

"I know Kade and his family.  Do you want me to go talk to him?  This really isn't like him.  I've
never
seen him obsess over anyone."

I let an exhausted laugh free.  He's so far off base.

"He's not obsessed.  He feels bad for judging me, but not because he thinks he was wrong, and not because he misses me.  I did him a favor a couple of weeks ago, and it has him confused.  It wouldn't have ever worked out.  We're way too different.  He'll remember why he left me soon enough, and all this will stop."

Dane's eyes become alight with intrigue.  Crap.

"Why did he leave you?  Since you brought it up."

I glance around the club at all the waitresses preparing for the soon-to-be-here customers, and I motion to them.  "Because I'm one of them.  Not one of you.  As a matter of fact, I'm not even good enough to be one of them."

His eyes darken and a flash of anger comes over his face.  "He left you because of your financial status?  You're serious?"

I huff and quickly shake my head, dreading the mess I've just made.  "No.  He knew I was poor before we started dating.  He was great, but I have baggage.  Baggage that could wreck his future plans.  It's a long story.  I really need to get back to work.  My boss will kick my ass if I don't."

He smiles at my playful ending note, but it's forced.  And I retreat quickly when my phone buzzes in my pocket.  Kade.  Again.  He's relentless.  It'll have to stop soon.

The club is beyond packed.
  The dancers on the stage are getting catcalls, money tossed, and marriage proposals.  What am I getting?  Crappy tips and a groped ass.  I picked the wrong job.

I head outside to take a break from all the loud music, dancing fools, and touchy customers.  The sand finds my heels, and I strip them off to allow my toes to press into it.  The ocean sprays the air, making everything seem fresher than it is.  It always helps to deal with the madness.  And with a view like this, it's easy to forget my problems for a few brief seconds.

Strong, familiar, warm arms wrap around my waist as a small kiss finds my neck, while someone nuzzles their face against me.  My heart almost explodes as the contradicting emotions stir a storm within me.

"I've missed you," Kade says, making my first tear fall.

I try to pull away, but he has his arms locked around me, and his soft, perfect lips start making a trail from my ear to my jaw.  "I'm sorry, Raya.  I'm so fucking sorry.  Please forgive me.  Come back."

I cry harder.  It was hard to read things like this on his cards that were attached to the flowers, but now, hearing it aloud... this is torture.

"Kade, you don't really want me back.  You're confused because I saved your vineyard."

"No the hell I'm not.  Raya, I've wanted you back since you walked out.  I'm a jerk.  I'm an idiot.  I'm every form of stupid there is.  I made the biggest mistake of my life.  Please, please come back.  Let me make it up to you."

I try to break free again, but his hold is too tight.  It only loosens for a second, but that's simply to spin me around to face him.  Oh damn.  I wish he hadn't done that.

Those beautiful blue eyes that have haunted my fantasies, my dreams, and my life are now staring into mine.  It almost hurts to have to see the man I love, especially when I know he's here for all the wrong reasons.

"Kade," I mumble, feeling my lip tremble as tears drip from my eyes.  "You don't... you don't want to be with me.  I'm a conman's daughter.  Your business, your dreams, and your name can't be tainted by a girl-"

His lips find mine, halting my objection, and he grips me tighter, pulling me to him to further drive me crazy.  It'd be so much easier if I hadn't fallen in love like the fool I am.

When his tongue sweeps in, it takes all my strength to force him back.  My tears storm my cheeks harder as he stumbles and almost falls, and I grab the door to jerk it open before he can regain his balance.

"Just go home, Kade.  Please leave me alone."

I run in, deciding to call it a night, and I head toward the front, desperate to escape the man who is probably already coming after me.

Dane is going to kick my ass
for calling in, but I can't help it.  Kade needs a few days to digest things.  After last night, I'm scared of seeing him at work again.  It'd be too easy to give in.

A loud knock at the door draws my attention, and I walk over to the window.  The covered porch hinders me from seeing who might be knocking downstairs, but it doesn't block my vision from the Range Rover I know too well.

"Damn it," I whisper to myself, tensing up.

"Coming," Dad yells to the door.

I rush to intercept him, but I barely make it halfway down the stairs before the door opens.

"Yes?" Dad asks, completely unaware of who he's talking to.  Thank God I can't see him.

All I can see is the open door and my oblivious father.

"I need to talk to Raya, please," Kade says, sounding exhausted.

"And you are?" Dad probes, but by now he probably has it figured out.

"Kade Colton."

I almost get sick.  How did he find out where I live?

"I think you know by now she doesn't want to see you.  You should go and forget this address."

Dad starts to shut the door, but it thumps and stops against something, most likely Kade's foot.

"I really have to see her, Mr. Drivel.  It's-"

"Capperton," Dad interrupts, almost growling.  "It's Ray Capperton.  I don't use Drivel."

"Sorry," Kade says, almost sounding amused.  "Mr. Capperton, I'd really like to have a chance to apologize.  Raya is wrong about us.  I-"

"You hurt her," Dad says simply, interrupting him again.  "She trusted you and you hurt her, because you, like all the other morons she meets, judged her based on
my
actions.  She's a good girl.  She has a heart like you'd never understand.  She's the most forgiving, understanding, and compassionate person I've ever known, and you hurt her.  She doesn't want to talk to you."

Tears fill my eyes as I sit down and draw my knees to my chest like a scared little girl.

"I didn't judge her.  Mr. Capperton, I fucked up.  You don't understand.  If you'd just let me-"

"What?  Let you in?  Let you stalk my daughter more?  You're lucky I'm not calling the cops.  Believe it or not, I've actually got a few friends in that department.  You have your vineyard, your plans can move forward, and your life will be as fucking shiny as you like it.  You're the one who doesn't understand.

"You didn't fuck up because of what you said once.  It's what you've preached about.  Your life is supposed to be perfect.  You want that.  And you've made Raya feel as though she's inferior.  My daughter is a better person than you'll ever be.  Ever.  She doesn't deserve to feel as though she's a lesser person because of decisions I've made, because of the money she didn't have handed to her, or because of where she came from.

"She's strong, and you damn near broke her.  Now, go. The fuck.  Away."

Kade's feet move loudly across the porch and Dad slams the door.  He takes several deep breaths as though he's holding himself back.  Then he looks up to notice me for the first time, and tears are gathered in his eyes just as they are in mine.

He starts to speak, but there aren't any words.  Instead, he nods once to me, and I nod back as a silent conversation passes between us.  Then he walks away, leaving me to sob on the steps.  Maybe now Kade will just leave me alone.

A loud
thud
in my room and a slight groan startles me, and I rush back up the stairs to find Kade climbing back up from the floor under the window.  How the hell he did he get in here?  That tree is almost five feet away, and it's the closest means of climbing.

"I knew you'd be on the top floor," he mumbles, rubbing his side as though it hurts.

"Kade, are you crazy?" I gasp, ignoring the pang of desire I feel when his eyes meet mine.

He shakes his head as he dusts his clothes back into place and he heads over to the door to shut it, letting his body brush against mine along the way.

"Crazy?" he asks, turning back around, looking as weary as I feel.  "Raya, I passed crazy a long damn time ago.  I've done everything I know to do.  I'm not letting you go.  I can't.  Not unless you can tell me you don't give a damn about me at all.  Can you do that?  Because judging by those tears in your eyes, you still want to be with me, but you're just too fucking stubborn to listen to me."

His tone is attempting to be even, but his exhaustion makes it come across as frustrated.  He takes a step toward me, and I take one step back, keeping the distance between us.

"Your father is right.  You're so much better than me, too good for me.  You're the most incredible person I could have ever found, and I'm the biggest jerk in the world."

He's being too loud.  Dad has to be able to hear him.  Maybe he'll come up and toss Kade out... through the downstairs doorway, of course.  Not my window.

"He didn't phrase it like that," I softly interject, trying not to sound as breathless as I feel.

Kade smiles, and my heartbeat speeds up even more.  He keeps himself between me and the door, cutting me off from any escape.  The window is out of the question.  I still don't know if he jumped from that tree, but I'll kick his ass if he did.  Well, I'll try to kick his ass.

"He should have," Kade says, taking another step toward me and making me step back again.

"Please go, Kade," I almost whimper.

"Not this time, Raya.  Even if you forced me out, I wouldn't give up.  I'll jump from that fucking ridiculously scary tree everyday if you make me.  Just try to leave the window up for me from now on.  It's hard to hang on and force a window up."

His playful grin doesn't match his serious eyes.  Another step forward for him, and another step back for me.  This time, my back hits the wall, ending my room for retreat, and Kade smirks before taking another step toward me, keeping that predatory gleam in his eyes.

"You don't feel like you're good enough, and that doesn't make a damn bit of sense to me.  I couldn't give a fuck about your father or what he did.  I wouldn't give a damn if you had done the same thing," he says, destroying any illusion of strength I thought I had left.

Be strong, Raya.  Please be strong.

"My father is a con.  Even if he's not out conning the world the way he used to, his past will haunt you just as it does me.  No one in this society will ever back you if you have me and my reputation tethered to you.  They'll whisper, gossip, and run your name through the ground.  Just like they did mine back home.  It'll catch up with me here.  I'm sure Courtney is already spreading the word.  You need to-"

"I need to be with you.  That's all I need.  My father's name holds more weight in this town than Courtney's or her family's.  Even if it didn't, so what.  I don't care what anyone thinks.  I've spent my life worrying about the opinions everyone else has.  I've spent too much time playing some stupid, elaborate game that I don't care about anymore.  I was hooked.  That's all.

"I was hooked on the game... just like your dad, Raya.  I'm nothing more than a con.  I don't have a single genuine friend outside my family.  I realized that almost as soon as you left.  I'm the one people should look down on.  I'm the one who could tarnish your name.  But I won't be this way anymore.  Fuck it all.  I want real friends - people who are there for me when I need them, just like my family.  Just like you were."