Tracey closed her eyes and felt
herself drifting off to sleep. “I can’t keep my eyes
open.”
“
Me neither,” Noah teased.
“Wake me up when we get there.”
Her eyes flew open. “No! Don’t even
talk like that!”
“
Just kidding. Remember, I
usually ride solo, so I’m used to long distances without
interruption. You go ahead and fall asleep. I’ll wake you if you
start to fall off, deal?”
“
You have a really sick
sense of humor, you know that?”
As they rounded a curve in the road,
the line of hand signals cautioned them to slow down and come to a
stop.
“
What’s the matter?”
Tracey asked, placing her hand on Noah’s shoulder.
“
Looks like there may be
an accident up ahead.”
As the bikers all came to a stop on
the two-lane highway, they couldn’t see ahead because of an incline
and bend in the road. All they could see were a dozen or more
vehicles stopped in front of them.
“
Can you see anything?”
Gristle called out from behind them.
“
Nothing,” Noah said as he
and Tracey stepped off their bike. “I’ll go see what I can find
out.”
“
I’ll come with you,”
Gristle said, handing his helmet to Maleeka. “Now, you stay here
and stay outta the road, you got that?”
“
Why? How come I
can’t—”
“
I’ll keep you company,”
Tracey said as the guys walked away. An uneasy feeling crept under
her skin.
“
I don’t know about you,
but I
needed
another break,” Maleeka said, twisting and turning. “How they
do this—all these miles on these motorcycles? Least in a car you
can move around now and then.”
“
Ah, but think how much
more—”
“
Oh, this can’t be good,”
Maleeka said, looking over Tracey’s shoulder. “Here comes an
ambulance and a police car.”
The emergency vehicles cut their
sirens as they came closer, their lights still flashing. Shortly
after passing them on the shoulder of the road, they came to a
stop. They could hear other sirens in the distance. Tracey and
Maleeka started walking toward the crash scene, forgetting their
promise to stay behind. As they crested the hill, they could see
three mangled and twisted vehicles sitting at odd angles, on and
off the road. Shattered glass covered the road along with bent
bumpers and broken tail lights. The biting smell of gasoline filled
the air.
“
Oh good Lord, what a
mess, what a MESS,” Maleeka said, taking the words out of Tracey’s
mouth.
People surrounded the vehicles,
including most of Buddy’s Elders, distinctive in their black
leather jackets. She shielded her eyes from the sun, looking for
her father and Noah. They appeared to be speaking to someone in a
small red car that had flipped upside down. Buddy turned and
shouted to the paramedics, motioning for them to hurry.
When she looked up, Noah
was no longer in view. She assumed he was on the other side of the
vehicle. Another ambulance arrived, its siren making short, loud
chirps as though to say,
get out of the
way!
Two more squad cars filed in behind
it.
As the emergency personnel rushed
toward the accident, the policemen began corralling the onlookers,
pushing them back to a safer distance.
“
Maleeka, do you see
Noah?”
“
No, I see Gregory and
Buddy and some of the other guys, but not Noah.”
A fire truck arrived, its
blaring siren filling her soul with dread. As it pulled into the
grassy median alongside the wreckage, Tracey prayed silently. She
watched in disbelief as the emergency personnel pulled a young
child from inside the small red compact. Still inside, a woman
screamed for her baby.
Why aren’t they
getting her out too?
She felt Maleeka’s hand take her own,
clasping it tight. “Oh, dear Jesus, help these people!” Tracey
joined her in silent prayer, thankful to close her eyes to the
scene below.
Eternity seemed to pass before the
crash victims were loaded into ambulances and driven away.
Gradually, the Elders made their way back to their bikes, none of
them speaking. Gristle took Maleeka in his arms as tears tracked
down his face.
“
The mama, she didn’t make
it. She gone,” he cried quietly.
Tracey rushed past them, searching for
Buddy and Noah. She finally spotted them off the side of the road.
Noah sat on a guardrail, his head in his hands. Buddy stood over
him, his hands on Noah’s shoulders. Dread washed over her again.
Then, just as she neared them, Buddy held up his hand, shaking his
head. The message was clear.
She stopped in her tracks,
nodding a silent response. Wrapping her arms around herself, she
bowed her head and continued to pray.
Oh
God . . .
Suddenly, she heard footsteps and
looked up. “Noah?”
He didn’t look at her, but briefly
squeezed her shoulder as he walked by. She turned to follow him,
then felt another strong hand stop her.
“
Give him a minute, Tracey
Jo,” her father said, putting his arm over her shoulder.
“
Is he okay?” When her
father said nothing, she turned to look in his eyes and found them
moist. “Daddy, what’s wrong?”
They walked slowly back toward the
other bikers. “I don’t believe in ghosts, but I think sudden
triggers can evoke all kinds of memories and images that haunt our
souls. The young woman in the car . . .”
“
Reminded him of
Melissa?”
“
Yes.” He said nothing for
a moment or two. “I assume he’s told you about her
accident?”
They stopped alongside Stella. “No,
not yet. He promised to tell me at some point. Alex told me he’d
lost his wife in an accident.”
Buddy gathered her into his arms.
“Yes, he did. And on that day, his wife was driving a small red
car.”
“
Oh, no.”
“
Be patient with him,
sweetie. He just needs a little space right now.”
Noah felt like a short bungee cord was
wound tightly around his chest. He’d experienced the sensation
before, but now was not the time for breathing exercises or
stretching out until it passed. As Noah approached his Harley, he
put one hand on the handlebar and one on the seat to steady
himself. He closed his eyes, trying desperately to shut out the
glassy stare of the young woman in the small red car. Her seat belt
had tethered her to the driver’s seat, suspending her from the roof
of the upside-down vehicle. She was pinned at an awkward angle,
unable to move her head against the smashed-in car door.
She had screamed for her child, unable
to see the paramedics carefully unhooking the child seat where her
little one was secured. As the toddler was safely removed from the
back seat of the car, the mother’s screams had continued, begging
to know if her daughter was okay. Buddy and Noah had tried to calm
her as other paramedics worked to free her.
As Buddy continued murmuring his
reassurances, she suddenly fell silent. Noah had leaned in,
pressing his fingers to her neck but finding no pulse there. He
tried again and again. Nothing.
After the paramedics asked him to step
aside, they too were unable to find a pulse. Noah’s eyes had been
riveted to the vacant eyes of the young woman, his own emotions
crashing in on him. He’d turned away and rushed off to a nearby
tree where he lost his lunch. Buddy had been at his side
immediately.
“
You’ll be okay,” he’d
said calmly, handing him his handkerchief. “Take some deep breaths,
Noah. It will pass. Let it pass.”
Buddy led him to the guard
rail where he’d tried to breathe again, but nothing seemed to help.
When Tracey had called out to him, he couldn’t think. The sun was
too bright. Too many eyes were looking his way.
I have to get out of here. Now
.
He’d hurried by her, knowing he
couldn’t speak and thankful that Buddy was there for
her.
The roaring riptide of emotions
threatened to roll over him and drag him under.
He picked up the extra helmet, quickly
stepped over to set it on Stella, then got on his own bike and
cranked it up.
Gristle reached over to pat him on the
back. “Noah? You okay, bro?”
Noah pulled away, holding his hands
up, shaking his head.
Suddenly, Tracey was there, Buddy
right behind her. The look on her face pulled the imaginary bungee
cord tighter around his chest.
“
Noah, where are you
going?”
“
C’mon, Noah. Don’t
leave,” Buddy said.
“
Back off!” Noah snapped,
hating the sound of his voice.
They froze, all staring at
him.
“
Please
don’t go,” Tracey pleaded with tears in her
eyes.
He pushed his sunglasses in place.
“I’m . . . I have to . . . I’m
sorry.” He turned his bike the way they’d come, and roared off as
fast as he could, refusing to glance in his rearview
mirror.
Chapter
1
9
A week passed. Noah hadn’t called. He
wasn’t taking Buddy’s calls. Apparently, he wasn’t taking anyone’s
calls. Tracey had stopped listening for the sound of his Harley and
wondered if he’d ever return. She wasn’t angry that he left. Both
Buddy and Alex had told her he often took off like this, sometimes
for weeks at a time. They’d learned to give him his space. Tracey
was trying, but the consuming worry seemed to eat at her day and
night. She knew he could take care of himself, but it was the
condition of his heart that concerned her most of all. He’d come so
close to letting her in. But now? It all felt like a distant
memory.
Tracey busied herself finishing pieces
for the shop which was almost completed. Their upcoming grand
opening gave her less than a week to go. The deadline enabled her
to focus all her efforts and thoughts into getting the place ready.
But late at night, after a long soak in the tub, the emptiness of
Noah’s continued absence loomed all around her.
On one such night, she padded
downstairs to make herself some hot tea. She was surprised to find
her father still up, reading in the den by the fire.
“
You’d think after all
these years, I’d know the sound of my daughters’ footsteps,” he
said, placing the bookmark between pages. “I thought for sure you
were Alex.”
“
Sorry, Dad. What are you
doing still up?”
“
Couldn’t sleep. Came down
for hot tea. There’s still some in the kitchen if you’d like
it.”
“
You must’ve read my mind.
I’ll be right back.”
Tracey made her way to the kitchen,
filled her mug with tea, then joined her father back in the den.
She took a seat beside him on the sofa. “What are you
reading?”
“
C. S. Lewis.”
“
Your
favorite.”
“
True. I wish I possessed
even one one-hundredth of his wisdom. Maybe then life would make
more sense.”
“
Well, for what it’s
worth, I think you do all right,” she said.
He closed the book and turned toward
her, quirking a smile. “Lewis once said, ‘You can never get a cup
of tea large enough or a book long enough to suit me.’ I’d have to
agree. Wouldn’t you?”
She nodded then blew on her
tea.
“
So what’s got you up so
late after a long day’s work?” he asked.
Tracey took a sip then shrugged. “A
little this, a little that. I’m excited about the store opening.
It’s been good, having something to keep me busy.”
“
Alex says you have a real
knack for restoring furniture.”
Tracey smiled. “You know Alex. Always
the encourager.”
“
Maybe so, but I can see
for myself she’s right.”
“
Still, I just
can’t . . . no matter how hard I try, I
can’t—”
“
You can’t stop worrying
about Noah?”
She blew out a weary sigh. “I can’t
stop worrying about Noah.”