Holidaze (26 page)

Once inside my dream world, the first thing I notice is that it’s very bright. The light’s almost blinding, but I can make out several shapes ahead. I begin my trek to Misty’s dream, which is where I’m going to change as much as I can before she wakes up. Mama’s drumming is still audible, but the further I walk into my dream the softer the beats become.

As I drift off into my alternate reality, visions of women dancing with snakes creep into my thoughts. My dream vision is hazy, but I can make out Maman Marie’s silhouette among the fire-lit circle of bodies. I stare at her fierce body movements as she matches the fast tempo of the drums, beat for beat. I can’t tell if she’s dancing to the drummer or the drummer’s playing to her. Either way, they’re in perfect sync.

The next image that comes into my mind is of Legba’s veve, like the one at the shrine in Mama’s room. But instead of just one, there are hundreds of them lined up in a row, like a trail.

“Follow the veves, Jayd. That’s Legba leading you home.”
I can see the illuminated symbols leading back out of Misty’s dream, which is where the light is leading up ahead.

I now see images that don’t belong to me. They must be a part of Misty’s dream. As the shapes become clearer I notice that one of them is Misty’s grandmother, who passed away a couple of months ago. That’s when Misty and her mama joined forces with Esmeralda and my nightmare began. If I could bring her back to life it wouldn’t help much. According to Mama, and from my brief interaction with the woman, she was as evil as Esmeralda is, but without the powers.

“Jayd, focus,”
my mom says.
“We don’t have all night. Get in and out as quickly as possible.”
Damn, why does she have to put so much pressure on a sistah? I hear her though. I don’t want to be here any longer than necessary.

I concentrate on the first violation of Misty’s personal life, which came from Mickey. Seeing Misty’s thoughts up ahead, I focus intently on going back to that day Mickey called her out in front of the lunch quad for catching gonorrhea, after she ratted out Mickey’s pregnancy. I felt as helpless then as I do now that Misty’s taken her revenge out on me.

“I’m in,” I say to my mom. I can feel her mind relax a bit, knowing that I’m on the right path. Now I have to carefully undo everything that has been done over the past couple of months, ending with all of the drama we went through this past Christmas. The drumbeats are hard and heavy now as I begin unweaving the tangled web where Misty and Esmeralda are holding my sight captive.

“In your visions there was something distinctively powerful about each situation. Use that power now to help you get your sight back,”
Mama says. I can hear her in my mind just as clearly as I can hear my mom. Like I said before, Mama’s gangster with her powers.
“Stay focused on the drums and they will carry you home.”

“Now fight her, Jayd. You’re not alone.”
My mom’s words resonate deep inside of me and I’m ready to beat Misty at her own game. If she can steal my sight without my permission, I can damn sure go into her dreams and get it back without hers.

“The potion is working.”
I can see through Misty’s eyes, and for now she can’t do anything to stop me from taking my vision back. I see all that she sees, carefully undoing everything she and Esmeralda have done. It’s like I’m unraveling an intricate woven mind web. I’m sailing through the pictures in Misty’s mind, making them how they would have been had she not prayed for something different. This is the last time I sleep on my job.

It feels like when I’m sleepwalking as one of my ancestors again, except this time I’m my friend-turned-enemy. If there was a mirror around I think I’d go completely insane seeing myself as Misty in her dream. That’s a picture that would be forever etched into my mind. I guess this is how Lady Macbeth must’ve felt when she was sleepwalking after she murdered the king. My sleepwalking doesn’t stem from guilt, but it is just as destructive as hers was. Fortunately in my case, what’s done can, and most certainly will, be undone come hell or high water.

“Jayd, summon our ancestors and elders through your mo jubas. It’s time to finish what they’ve started.”
Mama reminds me of my prayers. I call on my ancestors’ names like I did at Tre’s service, like I’m supposed to do on a daily basis. They all appear in my dream, ready to help me back home. I also see Tre in my vision. He smiles and I smile back at him. I hope he knows I’ll keep his memory alive, even if he’s not my kin.

“Okay Jayd, it’s time to go. Make sure you’ve put everything back in place the way you envisioned it,”
Mama says. From what I can see, everything is as it was before Misty went on her hater rampage. I just hope it sticks in reality. I guess I’ll find out when I wake up.

I rub my sleep-encrusted eyes with my knuckles and yawn loudly like I’ve been asleep for days. I push myself upright in my bed and see Mama standing over me. Why is she looking at me like I was dead and now I’m coming back to life? I look around the small room and start to come to a little bit. I feel hazy, like I did after my breast reduction. I was under anesthesia for several hours and when I finally woke up I didn’t even know what day it was, much like I feel right now.

“Jayd, are you hungry, baby? Here, have some breakfast,” Mama says, placing a breakfast tray on the bed beside me.

“What time is it?” I ask, taking a banana off of the tray of food. I’m starving.

“A little after eleven.”

“What? I’m going to miss the entire school day,” I say, ready to jump out of bed and get dressed, damn the shower. With all of my recent absences I can’t afford to miss another day.

“It’s Saturday, Jayd, remember? Yesterday was the Valentine’s Day dance. You came back here afterward.” I look at Mama, completely dumbfounded by her words. I’m never here on the weekends. And I damn sure don’t remember any dance or coming back to Compton after. Why would I do that?

“Mama, I’m drawing a complete blank,” I say, stuffing one of the mini croissants into my mouth now that I’ve inhaled the banana. Mama’s put a complete spread out of fresh fruit, croissants, and yogurt, with juice and tea to accompany it. Mama rarely makes breakfast, let alone serves it in bed to me or anyone else. What gives?

“I know, baby. But as the day progresses you’ll get your memory back. And the more sleep you get the more rested you’ll feel. Eat up. And don’t forget to take your pills. You only have one more dose left.” I notice the bottle of medicine on the tray with Dr. Whitmore’s label on it.

“My dreams,” I whisper, remembering part of my dream last night. “They’re back to normal.”

“Yes, baby, they are.” Mama pats my head and smiles as I continue devouring my food. It feels weird being here on a Saturday, but if this is how it is I’ll be here more often.

“No, little one. Mama’s only doing this to help you gain your strength back. Once you’re up and running again it’s back to the regular grind for you,”
my mom says, setting me straight. Mama looks at me, knowing my mom’s in my head.

“Tell your mother she left her scarf here. You can take it to her this afternoon when you go over there.”

“I assume you heard that,”
I think back to my mom. My mouth’s too full to speak.

“Yes, I did. Rest up, baby, and I’ll see you in the morning. I didn’t get to see my man last night since I was fooling around with you, so we’re going to make up for it tonight, especially with it being Valentine’s Day and all. Smooches and I love you, girl.”

“Last night? What happened last night?” Mama stops putting her laundry up and sits at the foot of her bed directly across from mine. She stares at me so intently, forcing my eyes to lock with hers. Her eyes begin to glow and mine feel like they’re glowing right along with them.

Through Mama’s eyes, I see everything that happened last night, right down to me getting my sight back from Misty. I look under the blankets and notice I’m fully dressed from last night, but my bracelets are gone. Everything must be back to normal, or at least our version of it.

“You can walk out the front door again. No need to sneak around the back. Esmeralda won’t try that shit again. She now knows just how strong your brown eyes really are.” Mama looks at me with tears in her eyes. She was really afraid of losing another daughter in our legacy to Esmeralda’s evil ass.

“I’ll never allow myself to become that distracted again,” I say, joining her on her bed and hugging her tightly. I didn’t realize how much I’d miss my dreams until they were out of my control. I’m so grateful Mama and our ancestors were there to help me regain my sight.

“Yes you will, girl. But now you know how to get back on track. And more importantly, you know how to work your vision. That’s the most important thing. Cherish your gift, Jayd, and you’ll never lose it again.”

“Yes, ma’am,” I say, wiping away my tears.

“Now, get up and get moving. The day’s almost gone and there’s work to be done, especially since you have your sight back. Our clients are waiting, my dear.” Every day Mama stays on her grind, and so do I. I feel like my old self, and that’s a blessing indeed.

I didn’t bother showering before changing my clothes, since I’m going straight to my mom’s house. I packed my bag in record time and am ready to leave and enjoy the new day. Walking out of the house, I see Misty and her mother leaving as well. I wonder how she feels now that I’ve stripped her of the powers she tried to steal from me. Maybe she has amnesia just like I did this morning.

“Good morning,” I say to them both. I don’t want to be rude, even if they did try to kill my vision. They both look at me, scolding me with their weak eyes. Misty’s have returned to their normal pretty brown and I’m glad for it. I smile in recognition: they do remember the fight they just lost.

I can’t wait to get to Rah’s house for the Valentine’s Day session this evening. If all is well in the world, my crew should be tight like glue. There’s nothing like being home for the holidays, and every other day of the year. And the best part about being home is chilling with my friends.

I
t’s so nice to be back with my friends for a regular session. The entire crew is here and we are chilling hard, just like old times. Tonight we’re at Nigel’s crib because his parents are out for the evening. I was able to fix what I could, but some things—like Nigel’s parents hating Mickey and me—haven’t changed a bit.

“Personally, I’m glad that nigga’s locked up again. Some people should never get out of prison,” Rah says, throwing down the local newspaper after reading the article on Tre’s murder. Rah’s right about that, and I know he doesn’t take prison lightly since his father is locked up for life. Rah’s not about any black man being on lockdown for anything petty.

“I’m done tripping off that shit. I’m sorry your boy Tre got blasted, but none of us got hurt, and that’s the most important thing,” Nigel says, rubbing Mickey’s belly like he used to. And to think, this moment almost didn’t happen. It’s happening now and that’s all that matters.

“I have to take this call,” Rah says, excusing himself from the rotation. Chance and Nellie are cozied up in the corner like they’re really in love. I hope for his sake they are. Mickey takes the blunt from her man and passes it to me. I smile at my girl and she smiles back, knowing she’s tripping for that move.

“I’ll give it to Rah,” I say, rising from my spot on the futon and walking toward the bedroom door.

“Who’s that in the background?” I ask, hearing a female’s voice through his cell. It’s too far away for me to make out. Maybe his mom is home for a quick change between sets at the strip joint. He hangs up his phone and takes the lit blunt, looking at me pensively before answering.

“I wanted to tell you this before, but you were having your sleep issues and whatnot.” When Rah stalls in his explanation I know whatever he’s done is bad. Very bad.

“Who was that?” I repeat. He continues to avoid giving me a straight answer by telling a long-winded story that I’m not interested in hearing. I ignore most of his words, but the last thing I do hear is Sandy’s name.

“Sandy’s out of jail and in your house? Why?” I’m ready to throw the phone across the hallway. It’s bad enough I just went through hell and back, now I have to deal with his evil baby-mama drama. Enough is enough.

“Because she needed somewhere to be released to. She’s under house arrest and if she stayed with her grandparents the only way I’d ever see my baby girl is by driving to Pomona on the weekends, and I can’t have that. She needs her daddy and her daddy needs her.” I feel for Rah but this isn’t going to work.

“Wasn’t there another option? What happened to you going for full custody? Isn’t this the opposite direction? You’re the one who turned her in, remember?”

“Yes, I do, and that’s why I’ve got to help make this right, Jayd. I don’t want Rahima growing up with her mama in jail and shit.” What he’s not saying is that he doesn’t want his daughter growing up like he and his brother are now, and I can understand that. But this is not the answer to my prayers, or Rahima’s.

It sucks that going back and giving our recent past a makeover had to have consequences that I have to deal with so personally. The universe really has a sense of humor, allowing Sandy to move in with Rah so he could have Rahima twenty-four seven. Yeah, that was some real funny shit right there.

“This is some twisted mess, Rah. You know that, right?”

“One man’s twisted is another man’s normal, Jayd. I don’t know what else to say, baby. You just have to trust me on this one.” Rah’s words hit too close to home for me. Him living with Sandy is crazier than anything I’m used to, and I don’t know that I trust him enough to deal with his new dysfunctional family drama. But what else can I do?