His Convenient Mistress (19 page)

‘What I felt for him was nothing like what I felt for you. Correction,
feel
for you. I was young and innocent when I got involved with Phillip and when it all went wrong, well, I thought I would never recover. When I look back on it now, I see that I recovered very quickly. I was bitter, of course, on Simon's behalf, and angry as well that he had rejected his own son, but I got on with living, working, being a mother. But with you…' She looked at him helplessly, knowing that one harsh word would release her from her need to pour everything out before they walked away from one another one last time.

But no harsh word was forthcoming and his expression revealed nothing.

‘I was so utterly devastated, James, that yes, I wanted to retaliate, wanted to seduce you to teach us both a lesson. Me a lesson in not trusting and you a lesson in taking
advantage of me…I didn't stop to wonder how it was that seduction should have been so easy, so pleasurable. I should have hated you, should have hated you touching me, shouldn't I? But I didn't and the reason I didn't was that I had fallen in love with you. There. Now, you can throw that back in my face, but—'

‘You're in love with me.' Pure, undiluted happiness stole into his heart like a thief in the night, not that she was looking at him with the wondering eyes of a woman in love. More glaring at him, and he couldn't help himself. He smiled. A long, slow, utterly satisfied smile.

‘Yes, it's funny, isn't it?' Sara snapped, springing to her feet and striding across to him, hands furiously on her hips and her hair tousled across her face. ‘Positively hilarious when you think about it. So much for evening the stakes! You'll be thrilled to know that I didn't manage to achieve anything at all except to dig myself deeper into the hole I was hoping to jump out of. Hysterical. I can see you think that from the grin on your face.'

She turned to walk away, to go and get her son so that she could leave this place without completely breaking apart.

The hand that snaked out as she was swinging around, therefore, caught her unawares and this time Sara found herself falling. Again. This time literally—into his lap.

‘Not so fast,' he purred and the colour rose up into her cheeks in a wash of pink.

‘I've said what I wanted to say, now let me go! And you can wipe that insufferable grin off your face!'

‘No, I can't. Now, tell me again. Tell me that you love me…'

‘I don't intend to repeat anything for your benefit. Now
let me go
!'

‘No.'

‘What?' Sara struggled but it was impossible to make any headway. His arm was draped securely across her waist, just below her breasts.

And, feeble-minded idiot that she was, she couldn't help her body responding, growing hot, her nipples hardening just because she was so close to him, touching.

‘I said no. I won't let you go. I want to savour this moment.' He inched his arm a bit higher so that he could stroke some hair from her face.

‘It's horrible and
rude
to gloat,' she hissed.

‘This is the second time you have called me rude. You will have to work on my training.'

Her response was lost as his mouth met hers, crushing every word she could utter, devouring her until she could barely remember what he had said, never mind what she had intended to ask. He kissed her ruthlessly and she weakly gave up and allowed herself to return the lethal kiss.

‘Now, any more struggles and I shall have to do that again. Again and again and again. Until you hear what I have to say.'

‘Which is?' She was shocked by how breathless she sounded.

‘Which is that my story is very much like yours. Now, sh. Just listen, my darling.'

My darling?

‘Have you been drinking?'

‘Of course I have.'

‘Oh.' Disappointment trickled into her, lifted when he gently kissed the corner of her drooping mouth.

‘Last night. Quite a bit, in actual fact. Anything to help me get through the pain.'

Her eyes rose tentatively to meet his and what she saw there sent a flare of hope racing through her, stretching its
tentacles into every bone in her body before wrapping around her rapidly beating heart.

‘I told you that I had once been duped. And after that, I learnt self-control. When it came to women, they were my playthings, but I made sure never to get involved. I told myself that I was simply playing the game of relationships according to my rules. The truth was that I never met a woman who made me want to break them. Until you came along.'

Sara looked at him, mesmerised. If this was a dream, may she never wake up.

‘Yes, I wanted the Rectory. And if you had been anyone but you, I would have barged in and offered to cut you a deal. A very generous deal. But you…your smile, your voice, that hesitant little way you have of looking every so often…I couldn't cut any deals. All I could do was give in to the desire to be in your company. When you made a move on me in London, everything inside was telling me to run a mile and get back to the life I used to know, where everything was under control, but I couldn't.'

‘No?' Sara said stupidly, and he shook his head ruefully and smiled.

‘No. You had got under my skin, lodged somewhere deep inside me, and all I wanted to do was be with you. When I realised that—'

‘No, please don't say it. Please don't. I have never been sorrier or more stupid about anything in my life before.'

‘I was like a wounded animal. I came back here and drank as much as I could before I lost interest in drinking and just wanted to sleep it off.'

‘James.'

‘Will you stay right here? Don't move. Not an inch. I'll be back in one minute. There's something I want to show you.'

He was gone literally the minute, so short a length of time that she could hardly think of what it was he wanted to show her. She was too busy basking in the euphoria of every word he had just said. She wanted to commit each syllable to heart and hold them close to her so that she could fetch them out whenever she needed to.

‘This is for you.' He flicked open the lid of the black and gold box and she could only gape at the exquisite ring inside.

‘But it's a ring,' she said foolishly.

‘Correction. It's a ring for you, my darling. Have I rendered you speechless? Try it on. See if it fits. No, let me put it on your finger. I want to remember this moment for the rest of my life.'

‘This moment…' And it did fit. Perfectly. The solitary diamond was dazzling.

‘I'd intended to ask the question when I came up this weekend. I…' A dark flush spread across his cheeks and he looked like a boy, grappling to find the right words.

So beautiful. She placed her hand on the side of his face and he immediately turned it over so that he could press his lips against the palm of her hand.

‘I haven't had much practice at this sort of thing…'

‘Much?' Sara laughed shakily.

‘Any. I just want to say that I waited all my life for you. I wish I'd known that you were right there all along, in London, with your son… My darling, will you marry me?'

‘Absolutely. Yes, yes, yes. Marry you, be with you forever, live wherever you want us to live…'

‘Which is right here, of course, unless…'

‘Right here.' She sighed with exquisite happiness. ‘Who would have thought it? Right here is where I feel I belong,
next to you. Just as your mother felt being here with your dad.'

The thought was like dawn breaking over the deep blue sea. Right here. Now and forever.

Their lips met and their kiss was a seal of all eternity.