His Absolute Betrayal - Elise's Love Story: The Billionaire's Continuum (#2) (A Contemporary Romance Novel) (8 page)

I didn't want him to stay.  I wanted him to leave.  I wanted to leave, too.  Tammy was an idiot and wanted the exact opposite of what I wanted, so I thought I should go with that instead.

"Can't, hun," Jacob said.  "Maybe another time?"

I winked at him.  "It's a date, Mister.  I'm going to hold you to that."

He blushed and turned away to talk with Sam again.  Sam shooed me back to the storage closet, presumably to get the napkins.

I pushed aside the curtain and returned to my previous hiding spot.  Lucent stood there, staring at me, unblinking and dumbfounded.

I blew him a kiss and grinned, giddy, then skipped past him and grabbed a large package of napkins.

Before I left, Lucent grabbed me.  He grabbed me and kissed me hard.  I dropped the napkins and they softly thudded to the ground at my feet.

Lucent's hands were on me, around me, holding me.  He cupped my rear tightly in his palms, urgent fingers squeezing my curves.  His lips accepted no other response from mine except immediate passion, so I gave it to him.  We kissed hard, frantic.  I wanted him.  If he undid his pants and lifted my skirt right then and there, I thought I would have given in to him, too.

That didn't last long, though.  We kissed for a few seconds that seemed like an infinite amount longer, then Lucent let me free.  He backed away, holding me at bay even while I tried to move in to kiss him more.  Bending to pick up the napkins, he handed me the bundle and then turned me towards the door.  I frowned for my last few seconds of hiding with Lucent, then stepped back into the main room of the restaurant and put on a happy face.

Jacob finished talking with Sam by the counter while I went through all the napkin holders and refilled them.  I had no idea what I was doing at first, but after picking up the holders and turning them around in my hands, I found some directions that helped.  I filled them as best I could, humming and prancing around, table to table.  Jacob finished his official police business with Sam.  I smiled and waved to him before he left, and he smiled and waved back.

He was gone.  I finished packing the napkin holder in front of me.

"Nice job," Sam said from behind me.  "You're hired."

I turned around, laughing.  "Thanks, Sam."

Lucent joined us, stepping out from behind the curtain of the storage closet.  "Thank you, Sam," he said.  "And you, Miss Tanner."

"You have to call me Elise for that," I said.  "I saved your life."

Lucent smiled.  "I don't know if I'd go that far.  I do appreciate your quick thinking, though.  Thank you, Elise."

I smiled and skipped over to Lucent and hugged him.  He put an arm around me, protective, and held me close.

"So..." Sam said, looking to the both of us.  "Mind explaining that little incident?"

Lucent went to speak with Sam in the kitchens.  He asked me to stay in the dining area so he could explain things more easily, but I didn't really understand that.  I stayed, though, because what else was I supposed to do?  Follow them, defy Lucent outright?

I had no problems with defiance, but I didn't know what good it'd be right now.  I didn't know what I could add to the conversation with Sam; I didn't know what I could say that would help anyone understand anything.

Yes, I wanted to hear what Lucent had to say, but a part of me thought I already knew.  Another part of me thought that I had nothing to add by being there, that my presence in the conversation would be pointless, and so why force myself into it?

While the two men talked, I brought our plates back to our booth, and nibbled at my food while waiting for Lucent to return.  It didn't taste as good as before, though I didn't know why.  Everything seemed more serious now, even this breakfast—this meal—and it leeched the enjoyment out of it.  The flavors became bland, almost sickly and pale on my tongue, tasting of vague remnants of nothingness.

I felt sadly poetic at the realization of it, but there wasn't much I could do about that.  I should eat it anyways.  I mean, the kiwi tasted alright, sort of.  Maybe.

I peeked over my shoulder and stared past the cashier's counter and into the kitchens.  I didn't see Lucent or Sam, but slight shadows flickered here and there, giving me a faint glimpse of the idea of them.

I didn't belong here, and I knew that.  Not specifically
here
, but just here in this situation, having gone through all of this, having done everything I did.  Except what
did
I do to get here?  Not much, actually.  All things considered, I was along for the ride more than anything else.

Sam's Delicatessen was a regular sandwich shop by day, though in the mornings he catered to a different sort of breakfast crowd.  People who attended his club for BDSM things and that sort of alternative lifestyle came here in the mornings sometimes.  They were nice people, yes.  Lucent and I chatted with them sometimes.  Mainly me, though Lucent joined in on occasion.  I didn't really want to chat with them, but I didn't
not
want to chat with them, either.  It just sort of happened?  They talked, said hello, I said hi back, this came to that, they sat near us.  It was quiet and comfy and cozy and nice.

They seemed normal enough, except they liked to partake in alternative bedroom activities.  Whips and chains and paddles and tying people up and spankings.  Orders, demands, commands, forced into action, with feigned reluctance, or not.  Sometimes it all seemed a little out there to me, like I couldn't even begin to comprehend it.  I didn't understand them, though I didn't want to judge them for that, either.  They'd been doing this for years, they enjoyed it.  It was fun to them.  It was the sort of relationship they were looking for.

It was never the sort of relationship I was looking for.  Although, yes, perhaps I liked some of it.  I enjoyed Lucent and everything we did together.  We didn't have whips or chains, but he had paddles and he tied me up sometimes, and there were spankings.  We had more than enough orders, demands, and commands; or at least he did.  I never truly felt forced into action, but sometimes I liked to play at reluctance.  It was sexy to me.

I didn't know if that was all of me, though.  I didn't think of myself like that.  I wasn't "one of them," I was just myself.  If Lucent never liked any of those things, I thought I'd still like him well enough.  That sounded odd to think about, because I didn't know how to imagine Lucent not being like that, though.  Maybe I wouldn't like him at all, then?  I loved him, yes, but I liked him, too, and I thought that was an important distinction to make.

People had a large array of feelings they could have towards another person, you know?  Love, like, lust, friendship, appreciation, respect.  There were probably more, too.  And then the negative emotions.  I felt a lot of positive emotions for Lucent.  Possibly all of them.  Sometimes I felt some negative ones, though.  I didn't know for sure how to explain that.  Was confusion negative?  Concern, worry, and a little bit of doubt?  Everyone had doubts, right?  That was common.  You always heard about people having doubts before they got married, wondering if they were making the right decisions.

Lucent and I weren't even getting married, though.  I didn't think we were going to be there for awhile.  I wouldn't necessarily mind marrying him, but if he asked me right here and now, I didn't know what I would say.  Or what I should say.  I didn't know where we were in our relationship, especially after what happened last night and this morning.

While pondering all of this, I ate my food quietly.  When I finished, I took the black hard drive and set it in my lap, holding it like it was a patient cat.  It grew warm from the heat of my body and my hands until it almost felt alive.

Lucent finally returned.  He strode towards the booth and sat down beside me.  I looked at him and smiled, but I didn't know what exactly I saw of the man sitting next to me.

"Are you alright, Miss Tanner?" he asked, worry flitting through his brow.

I nodded softly.  "Yes.  Are you?"

He smiled and kissed my cheek.  "Of course.  Everything is going to be fine.  I'll finish my food and then we can leave.  I believe it's best if we don't bother Sam any more than we have to."

"Why do you call Sam by his first name?" I asked suddenly.

Lucent scrunched up his brow.  Pulling his plate towards him, he began meticulously slicing his sandwich into bite-sized pieces.  "It's complicated," he said before taking a bite of his breakfast.

"I'd like to know, though," I said.

He chewed and swallowed, then took another bite.  He didn't answer me until he finished swallowing that one.  "I don't know how to explain it.  There's a lot of back story involved."

"Do you feel more comfortable with him than you do with me?"

He reached for his mimosa and took a deep sip.  "That's a complicated question, as well."

"It seems to me," I said, "everything is complicated if you don't want to answer it.  Can you tell me anything that's not complicated?"

He sighed, laughing slightly.  I knew it was a sort of silly question, but I just wanted him to tell me something.  I wanted closeness and intimacy again.  We'd had it this morning, but I felt like we lost it sometime between now and then.  The near encounter with a police officer who wanted to arrest us certainly didn't help.  Stress and worry destroyed a part of the integrity of our relationship, but I wouldn't let it destroy the rest.

I helped Lucent.  And Lucent helped me.  We were in this together, whether either of us liked it or not.  Admittedly, I didn't quite like the idea of being on the run from the police, but on equal levels I didn't quite like the idea of being arrested and thrown into jail, locked away from Lucent and the outside world for the rest of my life, either.  I didn't know if that's exactly what would happen, because off the top of my head I had no idea what the punishment for arson was, but...

The hard drive in my lap spoke of potentially deeper crimes.  Possibly harmless ones, victimless and more white-collar than not, but that didn't make them any less criminal.  I still didn't know what other information was on there, either.

"I own Sam's Delicatessen," Lucent said, his voice quiet yet confident and assured.

"Um... what?" I asked.  "It's Sam's Deli.  He owns it."  I thought he did?  I looked towards the counter and saw Sam standing there, working on some puzzles in the newspaper.

"I'm a private benefactor.  The deal was made in strict confidentiality between Sam and I.  There are specific rules and regulations that we both must adhere to, though we find it mutually beneficial to continue doing so."

"And that means what?" I asked.

"I'd rather not say," he said.

"You've already told me part of it, so you might as well tell me the rest."

He went to take another bite of his breakfast, but I stole his fork away from him.  Lifting his brow, he gave me a peculiar stare.

"I'm going to feed you," I said.  This was new.  We hadn't really done this before.  It made sense in my head, though.

Lucent blinked, unsure and confused, then he acquiesced.  I took up a piece of his food and brought it to his mouth, feeding him.

"Alright, tell me now," I said.

"I'm chewing," he said, as politely as possible with a mouthful of food.  It made me smile.

He finished chewing.  "Alright, now," I said.  "Go ahead."

"Listen," he said.  "What I'm going to tell you must remain private.  Do you understand?"

"You listen," I said, pointing his fork at him.  "Who exactly do you think you're talking to right now?"

He stared at me, both resolute and befuddled all at once.  "Point taken, Miss Tanner."

"If you're going to tell me important things, you have to call me Elise," I said, suddenly feeling rather bratty.

"I don't want to call you Elise," he said.  "I'd prefer to call you Miss Tanner."

"I won't feed you anymore, then."

"You're going to deprive me of nourishment and force me to starve because I won't call you Elise?"

"Yes."

"I feel as if that's slightly more than unreasonable," he said.

"I don't," I said with the exact same tone.

He stared at me hard and I stared right back at him, refusing to give in.  Neither of us blinked.  I didn't know if this was a staring contest or what, but I knew I needed to blink soon, so in this drastic situation I took drastic measures.  Moving fast, I kissed him on the lips.

He blinked, caught off guard.

"I won," I said.  "You've got to call me Elise now.  Just for a little while, at least."

"You won?" he asked.  "What exactly did you win?  I don't remember agreeing to the terms of any particular game or dealings between us, Miss Tanner."

"Guess what?" I said.

He frowned at me, obviously disliking this entire turn of events and unsure what to make of it.  "What?" he asked.

"I don't care," I said.  And, with that, I stuck my tongue out at him.

Yes, childish, but I didn't care about that, either.  He was going to tell me, and he was going to call me Elise, no matter what, whether he liked it or not.  I'd make sure of it.

"You do realize I own this establishment?" he said.

"What are you going to do?" I asked, playfully taunting him.  "Have me thrown out?  Ban me from ever coming here again?"

He considered my words, silent.

"Just so you know," I added, "that'd be worse for you than for me.  Who would you go to breakfast with then?  You wouldn't get to split meals with anyone, either, and there'd be no one to tell you to get a mimosa, so you'd forget to do it.  And, you want to know what?  If that happened, you'd be missing out.  You'd be missing out on a lot, Lucent."

I meant it to tease him, but the more I spoke, the more I realized it was partially true.  That didn't mean that I wouldn't be missing out, also, but this was his place, not mine.  Not just because of ownership, but because of something more than that, too.  Because of the same reasons I thought about before as to why others came here for breakfast in the morning; those were Lucent's reasons, too.  Slightly different, possibly more controlled and orderly, but his reasons were similar.