Hint of Desire (18 page)

Arthur stalked the man like a wolf after a plump goose
. “I’ll let you know if and when I feel her ladyship is ready to speak. If you have no further questions I’ll see that you are escorted out. You don’t have further questions, do you?”

“No.
” The sound popped out from between Sir Drake’s florid lips.

St. Aubin wavered, but stood firm
. “There is still the matter of the child, my brother’s heir.”

“What of him?
” Arthur’s voice was disdainful.

“I would be more comfortable if he resided with me until this matter is settled
. I do worry for him.”

“You worry while he is my care?
” Arthur wished it were possible to actually stab with words.

“
Of course not, your grace, but I am his guardian. I only desire to fulfill my brother’s last wishes.”

“Then you should come and take the boy.
” Arthur watched  Lily as he spoke. She looked ready to faint. He continued anyway. This was the time to take his stand, state his claim. “Yes, that is what you should do. Surely, if you are correct, any one of these good men, officers of the law, would help you  – never mind that he is still the tiniest infant, surely in need of his mother. If you are correct, they would feel honor bound to help you . . . despite knowing how great would be my displeasure, that they might face the wrath of Westlake. Yes, I am sure that knowing you are the legal guardian, they would not waste a moment in insisting I place the boy in your eager hands.”

St. Aubin
paused and then let his head drop. Arthur lifted his quizzing glass to his eye and looked down at the other gentlemen.

“Well, do you request that I call for the child, my wife’s son?
” Lily did not know how the words could be so flat, yet so chilling.

“Oh no, your grace, obviously the child should stay with his mother
. We would never dream of taking him from . . . her.” Sir Drake attempted again to reach the door. This time he was allowed to pass.

“
I was clearly not thinking straight. Of course, the boy should stay with his mother.” St. Aubin looked at Lily in apology. “I am merely still distraught over the manner of my brother’s passing and seek the comfort of his son’s company.”

“I am glad you feel that way
,” Arthur’s voice trailed after him. “I would hate to have to post letters inquiring if anyone wishes to take the child I have brought into my house, to raise the matter at the House of Lords. Although, I am sure they’d take proper action . . . even knowing my feelings on the matter. Don’t you agree?”

Arthur then turned his attention away from the departing visitors, eyeing Lily
. He rested a hand upon her shoulder and rubbed at a tight muscle. “My dear, I can see this visit has taxed you grievously. I suggest you retire for a rest. We will talk later.”

Lily sank all the way back into her chair. She shifted uncomfortably and looked as if she wanted to vanish from the room. She couldn’t believe what was happening about her. She collapsed as Sir Drake and St. Aubin left, for only her tension had kept her upright. If it had not been for Arthur’s hands, wrapped lightly about her shoulders, she might have embarrassed herself by falling from the chair.

Instead, she became even more aware of that soothing touch
. For just a moment she closed her eyes and concentrated on nothing but the delicious feel of his strong fingers kneading her taut muscles. It was a sliver of heaven in an afternoon of hell. She let herself relax into the touch, reveling in the release and the pleasure. The silence that held them, for once, felt comforting rather than forbidding.

“Thank you.
” Lily’s voice wavered with exhaustion. “I don’t know what I would have done if you hadn’t appeared. I can’t think what made you say it, nor again what made Sir Drake believe you, but thank you,” she tittered – what an idiotic sound, betraying her nerves. “Such a ridiculous idea!”

“
Ridiculous?” Arthur lifted and eyebrow. “Why?”

“Why
? Well . . . I’ve known since childhood I wasn’t the kind of wife you would choose. I am sure there are hundreds of debutantes who’d be more than happy to be your wife.”

“You
are talking nonsense, girl.” Lady Smythe-Burke strode to the center of the room. “If Westlake said it, he meant it. About time, too. And if you’d ever seen him with all those silly young chits you wouldn’t be raising such ridiculous points.”

“You are as always correct, Aunt,
” Arthur rejoined, “but do you doubt my ability to speak for myself?”

“Never have before, but it took you long enough
. I didn’t know how to make it any clearer,” Lady Smythe-Burke shot back.

“I wasn’t aware that there was a clock going?”
Arthur returned the volley.

“I
should think six weeks will be sufficient time.” Lady Smythe-Burke moved to the door.

“What?
” Lily was completely lost. They were quoting from a book she’d never seen.

“I was thinking
you could be married in six weeks,” Lady Smythe-Burke explained. “It’s long enough not to be scandalous, but soon enough to keep Sir Drake off his guard. Plenty of time to have the bans read. Now I’ll leave you two alone. Door open, of course. You have plenty to discuss.”

Lily was still a step behind
. “Six weeks?”

“Is there a problem with that, Lily
?” Arthur asked, his voice dangerously soft.

She was
startled to hear him pronounce her given name. She’d told him to use it once before, but this was the first time she’d noticed him doing so. Her mind was shifting so quickly from one thing to another that it was hard to maintain linear thought. But one thing was clear.

“I can’t marry you in six weeks.”

“Do you need longer?”

“Yes
. I mean, no. You don’t want to marry me.”

“I believe I’ve indicated that I do.”

“No, you can’t. I am not the wife you need. I don’t know what you and your aunt are thinking”

Arthur clasped one hand on either side of her face and tilted her head further back until she met his glance fully
. The heat radiating from his hard, lean body covered her.

“I admit the thought took me by surprise
. I hadn’t even considered it when I first spoke the words. I was probably as startled as you were. I think only Lady Smythe-Burke in her own mysterious way had considered the option. Yet it took me but an instant to realize what perfect sense it would make. You have everything I need in a wife.”

“I do?
”

Arthur
grinned at her.

“Yes
, you do. You’re the granddaughter of a marquess. I don’t remember the details of your father’s lineage, but I do believe it was respectable. And you’ve proven your fertility.”

Lily flushed, and would have lowered her eyes if he had not held her trapped.

“I am aware that you don’t come with a fortune, but that I have no need of. It does concern me that you’re young. I never understood this fascination with schoolgirls, but you’ve been married and surely matured. I can’t imagine I’ll have to deal with childish antics.”

Lily could only nod
. She didn’t know how to reply to his speech.

“Then
, I find you attractive. Again, I wish you were older, but I can’t imagine that this will be a problem. Having a son, you can be no a stranger to the marital bed. So, I don’t believe that should present any difficulty.”

Lily
swallowed hard at that. Arthur was still little more than a stranger, and he was talking about marital intimacy. She refrained from shuddering as she considered what that entailed. Still, Arthur could only be a relief after the painful couplings with Worthington. But – what was she thinking? She couldn’t marry him. Despite his best efforts at persuasion, it simply made no sense.

“
. . . sense of duty. I must admit I feel a sense of obligation to you.” Lily started at that. Somehow the talk of marital intimacy had thrown her so much that she’d lost the thread.

“Obligation?
” She felt like a parrot continually repeating his words.

“The incident with my father.
” Arthur’s sudden stiffening and withdrawal as he spoke indicated it was not a topic he desired to pursue. He removed the hands that had been caressing her scalp, and straightened. He walked purposefully around her and, pulling a chair close across from her, sat down. He took her hands in his and clasped them tightly.

“It really is the most sensible plan, Lily
. Surely you can see that.”

“
The incident with your father? There’s no need for you to repay me for what I may have done as a child. I only did what anybody would have done. What matters is the situation we’re in now.”

“You’re exactly right
. That’s what I am trying to explain. It all makes perfect sense. I’ll get the wife I need and not have to worry about that gaggle of debutantes you mentioned before. It can all be taken in hand quietly, quickly and sensibly. I won’t need to change things at all. I’ve already seen how you fit into the house. You’re well brought up. It shouldn’t require much for you to learn to be my duchess. I know my aunt is prepared to help.”

“
No. It doesn’t make sense at all.” Lily refused to back down when the issue was of such importance. She might still be feeling the aftershocks of anxiety, but she would make Arthur understand her. She had been one man’s wife and had not desire to repeat that nightmare, being a wife made one property. No matter her circumstances she had no desire to be owned again.

“Your hands
are icy again. Do they ever get warm?”

“Arthur,”
she said softly, testing his given name for the first time. “I have to tell you about my life before the morning you found me. Once you know, you’ll understand why you cannot marry me.”

“Do you hold it against me that I haven’t tracked down your attackers
? I know I should have. I started to send men out, but then I heard Sir Drake had taken an interest in the matter and I made the foolish assumption that it was his responsibility to pursue the matter. I do not understand how he came to such a foolish conclusion. I do know that, given my previous vehemence, you must have expected that I would pursue the search. It is my duty to protect you and this is the simplest way.”

“No, you
must let me explain.” Lily wished more words would flow, but she paused – what could she say, to explain her fear of marriage would lead to the realities of her past marriage and that . . . no, she still could not talk of that.

“
I know you still have not recovered from you birth and the attack. Do you fear that I do not?”

Arthur
did not give her time to finish. “It’s Simon, isn’t it? You’re afraid that once we are wed and I’ve got my heir on you I will be content to send him to his uncle to be raised. You must understand that once you’re mine, he will be, too? And I’ll do anything to protect and care for what’s mine.”

Lily paused
. She withdrew her hands from Arthur’s and wrapped them about herself. It was, indeed, a factor she hadn’t considered. If she married Arthur, she would be putting Simon into his keeping. And everything she’d seen of him in the last few days told her it would be very safe keeping. No matter what happened to her, Simon would be safe.

All she had to do was hold her tongue until the wedding
and pray that no further evidence came to light. For the first time in weeks, she felt a deep sense of calm. She could almost feel the blood flow back into her veins, filling her with warmth. She rubbed her hands together for a second and then, of her own accord, placed them in Arthur’s.

“Yes, Arthur, I will marry you.”

The giggle alerted Lily that Gertrude was on her way
. Lily finished straightening the bed she’d mussed during her nap and turned to meet the maid.

“Oh
, dear, my lady, you oughtn’t be doing that. I don’t know what you can have thought!” Gertrude moved to straighten the already flat quilt. “Particularly not now. Not if it’s true, what they’re whispering in the kitchen.”

Lily turned to Gertrude
, confused. “What?”

“
Oh, my lady, forgive me. I mustn’t pry –“

“No,
no, speak. What are they saying in the kitchen?”

“
Why, that you’re going to be marrying his grace, of course. Are you? Or were they just having me on? I know they like to do that sometimes. Just because I tend to ramble on, and never seem to get what I mean out and said, I get teased. I’d bet you’d never have guessed? You don’t think I talk too much foolishness, do you?” Gertrude winked. “A lady’s maid is supposed to know all about gowns, and hair, and the latest styles. How can they expect me to keep up if I don’t speak about it?”

“I
daresay I don’t know.”

“
Then, you don’t know if you’re marrying his grace? My! How can you not know something like that?”