Highlander's Caress: Medieval Romance (The Fae Book 2) (17 page)

Inside the cottage, Ella tended to Ivor, cleaned and stitched his wound then burst into tears when her grandparents walked in the door and looked so stricken. She rushed across to them and Grandma bundled her up in her arms, a warm haven of strength within the storm of her emotions. She sobbed at the loss of life, babbled her distress at having brought such a battle to their doorstep, right here where she’d experienced only wonderful times. “I’m so sorry.”

“Duncan and Ethan met us in the meadow, told us all that had happened.” Grandma held her close.

“Gavin and his men’s deaths were inevitable from what we’ve been told.” Grandpa kissed the top of Ella’s head then nodded at Grandma. “I’ll go and aid Duncan and Ethan with the burials.”

“I’ll come with you.” Ivor rose from the seat where she’d tended him, his gaze on Grandpa. “The MacDonald will never allow his men’s deaths to pass without seeking retribution against those who had a hand in it.”

“Aye, I agree. Duncan also mentioned the same to my wife and I. He’s come up with a plan to deal with it.” Grandpa grasped Ivor’s shoulder. “Come, we’ll join the others now.”

“Stay right here.” Ivor cast her a look and when she nodded, he followed Grandpa out the door.

“Ivor is right. The MacDonald will certainly wish to seek his retribution against us all, and since we cannae change what has happened here this day, then we must prepare for what is to come.” Grandma rubbed her back, her words a soft murmur in her ear.

“I fear that retribution.”

“As do I. Come and sit.” Grandma urged her down into Grandpa’s rocking chair then knelt at the hearth, added another block of peat and once it had caught alight, dusted her hands against her kirtle’s blue skirts and rose. Frowning, Grandma pulled the three-legged stool from the corner closer and squeezed her knee. “A burden shared is a burden halved. Speak to me.”

“So many lives have been lost here this day and all because I chose to come and seek shelter with you.” Knees pulled to her chest, she wrapped her arms around them and rocked. Her heart ached, so bad. “All I ever wished to do was prevent such blood from being shed, no’ to have been the cause of it. I’ve dishonored Papa’s memory this day.”

“You’ve done no such thing, and I willnae have you think otherwise.”

“This is all such a mess.”

“The battle that occurred this day, and the deaths that came from it, were both unfortunate and unnecessary, but Duncan and Ivor did naught more than defend themselves, Ethan too in his need to halt the men seeking to attack you and your mate so underhandedly.” Grandma clasped her chilled hands, such sadness crossing her face. “While outside, Duncan spoke to your grandpa and I. He believes there is only one line of defense now open to us.”

“We cannae tell the MacDonald of Duncan’s involvement in this battle. He’ll come after him.”

“Duncan intends to take full responsibility for all that’s happened, and to ensure the rest of us remain clear of any involvement.” Grandma’s gaze softened. “You must allow him to do so. There’s no other way we can move forward if we all wish to survive the Chief of MacDonald’s coming wrath.”

“Excuse me.” Duncan stood inside the open doorway, water dripping from his hands and face where he’d scrubbed up at the water barrel outside. To her grandma, he said, “May I have a moment to speak to my wife in private? I need to do so afore I leave.”

“Of course, and know that we dinnae blame you for what has happened here this day.” Tears welling in Grandma’s eyes, she hugged Duncan then shuffled outside.

Her chosen one shut the door, the quiet
snick
reverberating like thunder in her ears. From beside the door, he collected his and Ivor’s satchels, although he left her bag sitting there as he made his way to her. “By my actions this day, I’ve endangered your life and that of your loved ones.”

“You did naught more than defend yourself. I’m the one at fault. I led you and Gavin right here.” Hot tears burned behind her eyes and slowly slid down her cheeks.

“Nay, my love, death pervades this place because of me, and once the MacDonald hears of all that’s happened here this day, I’ll have gained an even greater enemy than I already have. Right now, above all things, your safety and that of your kin must come first.” Pain slashed his face. “It has been decided. Ewen and Ethan will both ride to Dunscaith, speak to the MacDonald and inform him of all that’s happened, that I alone am responsible for slaying Gavin and his men. ’Twas simply most unfortunate that it occurred right here on your grandparents’ doorstep. That is the only way to clear them of any involvement.”

“The MacDonald will come after you.”

“Aye, but you’ll be safe, just as safe as you’ve always been, provided you no longer hold my name and that the MacDonald never learns we were wed. Fortunately, all those now aware of our bond lie below the ground, and at least that I can be grateful for.”

“You cannae think to leave me.” She heaved to her feet, her legs trembling. “I’m coming with you.”

“You need to remain here.” He strode to the door, halted and glanced over his shoulder at her, his expression tortured. “We are no longer wed. I repudiate my handfast vow.” Broken words, and each one tore at her heart.

“You cannae do this to us. After all we’ve been through, you truly wish to give up on our bond? No more marriage?”

“Ensuring your safety is imperative, and this is the only way to do so. Deep inside your heart, you know it too. There can be no more bond. I’ll never allow the MacDonald to use you or your kin as pawns in our war.”

“There has to be another way, Duncan.” Anger and frustration crashed fiercely inside her, made her heart cry out with the pain of her loss.

“There is none.”

“Dinnae leave me.” She wanted to scream and hit him, only she remained frozen and still.

“I love you, will always love you.”

“And I hate you,” she slammed back at him. How could he leave her like this? Just utter a few simple words and end their handfast and toss any possible future away.

“Farewell, Ella.” He shut the door and was gone.

She sank to the ground, never more lost and alone, her heart crushed.

* * * *

We are no longer wed. I repudiate my handfast vow.

Duncan’s final words continued to reverberate through Ella’s mind each day over the torturously long month that followed, the pain of his rejection never easing. Her chest burned where her heart had been, every day one in which she struggled to rise, woodenly saw to her chores which Grandma had set while Ethan moped around too. After the battle, Grandpa and Ethan had ridden to Dunscaith Castle and told the MacDonald what Duncan had instructed them to say, that he alone was responsible for his nephew and men’s deaths. The MacDonald chief had been furious, had sent out a band of his men to seek adequate justice and a mighty battle had ensued along the shores of Loch Carron near Ardan House.

Word had reached her in the following days, that even more men had lost their lives, a war that still raged even now.

“I know exactly how you’re feeling, my sweet.” Mama swished across the meadow toward where she lay in the long grass. Grandpa had sailed for the village and returned with Mama within days of Duncan’s leaving. Ever since, Mama had been trying to raise her spirits. Plopping down beside her in her red skirts, such sympathy and love shone in her parent’s eyes. “I hate to see you in such pain, Ella.”

“Each day seems excruciatingly endless.” She fisted the long grass while overhead wispy clouds floated past. “How did you survive without Papa?”

“All I wanted to do was curl up and die, but you and Ethan kept me sane until one day, I suddenly began to remember the good times and no longer focused on the bad. You must no’ forget that your mate still lives, that you have no’ lost him as I lost your papa. Take comfort in that.”

“The last words I threw at him still haunt me.”

“What did you say?”

“That I hated him.” Despair overwhelmed her, made each breath she took come harder.

“Deep in his heart, he knows the truth.” Mama laid a hand on her arm, stroked back and forth. “Your grandma and I have been speaking.”

“There is no child, Mama.” They’d both given her expectant looks this past week after she’d heaved up her morning meal each day. “You must cease saying so, or thinking so.”

“I couldnae eat either when I first conceived you and Ethan. Grandma too was the same when she carried her bairns. You also have no’ had your courses since your handfast.”

“Aye, but that means naught.” She laid a hand over her flat belly.

“Then what does it mean, my obstinate daughter?”

“Mama, I am no’ obstinate.” Huffing, she sat up in her breeches and tunic then swayed with dizziness at having moved so fast. Taking a deep breath, she steadied herself. “He does no’ want me anymore.”

“You love him.”

“He left me. Repudiated his vow and ended our handfast. If I’m to have his child, the poor thing will never hold his name, be known only as a bastard.”

“Aye, but the child will still be loved by us all. Never forget that.” Mama waved to Grandma who stood leaning against the doorway. “She still willnae listen to reason.”

“I’m listening perfectly fine.” She thumped the grass. “There is no child.”

“There is, my dear.” Grandma smiled as she sat with a flourish of her kirtle’s maroon skirts. “’Tis clear to see. We also all agree that we cannae allow Duncan to never hear news of the babe you’re carrying, or of its coming birth. ’Twould be wrong, very wrong.”

“I’m no’ allowed anywhere near Duncan, so that makes telling him impossible.”

“Duncan didnae have a choice but to repudiate your vow and leave.” Grandma plucked a yellow flower from the grass and tucked it behind Ella’s ear. “He had to accept what followed, just as we all did.”

“He took my heart and left me with naught but a gaping hole where it should be.” Gently, reverently, she pressed a hand to her belly, her breath stuttering in and out. She longed to have a part of Duncan to hold onto, a child with his beautiful blue eyes and her feisty temperament. Aye, she’d love naught more.

“We could sail for Ardan House this night, all of us, but only under the cover of darkness.” Grandma cupped her cheek. “We’ll ensure we remain disguised so no one can make us out on the water. Then we’ll return again once you’ve imparted your news. There and back in one night. It can be done.”

Just to see him one more time would likely kill her, but Grandma and Mama were right. She was expecting, her courses already two weeks late. One night. She would hate for Duncan to never know about their child, would never keep the knowledge from him as the knowledge of his true birth mother had been kept from him. He was to be a father, and she needed to tell him. With a nod, she murmured, “I want to go.”

“Then we’ll attire ourselves correctly and leave within the hour.” With one hand raised high, Grandma signaled Ethan and Grandpa as they both practiced with the bow and arrow across the other side of the meadow. “We leave for Ardan.”

Ethan and Grandpa strode across and Ethan extended his hand to her and tugged her to her feet. “We’ll be with you every step of the way.”

“Aye, as you always have been.” She hugged him and trekked inside.

In her chamber which she’d shared with Mama this past month, she changed into her darkest clothing to hide her form as best as she could for their trip out on the water. Black breeches donned, she tucked the hem of her black tunic in then bundled her hair under an equally dark woolen cap. With her black cloak on and Mama and Grandma wearing similar dark attire, she walked outside and joined Grandpa and Ethan as the sun lowered on the horizon.

“Are we all ready?” Ethan slung a satchel over his shoulder.

“Aye, as ready as we’ll ever be.” Mama hooked one arm through both hers and Grandma’s and they walked together along the tree-lined trail toward Kinloch harbor.

As the dark fully descended and the moon rose, only a slight curve of golden yellow in the night sky, they cleared the woods and arrived at the entrance to Kyle Rhea. Breathing deep of the fresh sea air, she hopped on board her grandparents’ skiff secured to its mooring. Ethan raised the sail while Grandpa sat at the stern and gripped the rudder. The wind blew and the pine trees rising high on her left swayed, while across the thin kyle on her right, the mainland rose. Ardan House beckoned.

* * * *

Slouched in the padded armchair in his chamber, Duncan took a long swig of the ale from his tankard, the drink doing naught to dull his endless pain. Legs stretched out and crossed at the ankle before the fire, the night sky beyond his window haunted him. With the passing of each day this past month, he’d joined his men as they sailed alongside the length and breadth of his land in their attempt to halt the MacDonald in his raids and attacks, their last battle a deadly one fought right here on Loch Carron. Now though, with the MacDonald retreating back to Skye, he sorely hoped for a small reprieve from the warring.

“My laird.” A knock rattled his door. “’Tis Ivor. You have a visitor, well actually you have five visitors, but only one wishes to speak with you right this very moment.”

“I’ve no wish to greet new arrivals this night, but by all means ensure they have a pallet to sleep on in the great hall and I’ll talk to them in the morn.” Behind him, his door swung open and he growled under his breath then shoved to his feet. “I said—”