High Stakes (The Kingdom Book 2) (18 page)

He leans forward and tips me off of his shoulder. I hit the bed with a thud, but I’m cushioned by the deep mattress. I claw at the sheets to sit myself up but Denham pins me before I can get myself into a sitting position.

“Before you start ranting at me about wanting to do things yourself, just hear me out. Okay?”

His hips straddle mine, but he doesn’t allow his weight to rest on me. His hands rest on his thighs and if I really wanted to, I could get up. I know he wouldn’t try and stop me. But the pleading tone in his voice tells me to sit tight, and hear him out. “Fine,” I answer agitatedly. I am grumpy with him. But I know it won’t last for long.

“There are many instances in my life where I haven’t acted quickly enough. Lots of heartache could have been prevented if I had just acted on impulse, and thought it through later. I can’t take that chance with your life, Ari. I can’t let someone take you away when I’ve only just found you.”

“I’m n—” I interrupt and he places his index finger gently over my lips, stopping the words from coming out.

“I know you want to be independent. I’m not trying to stop you. In fact, I want you to fulfill your heart’s every wish. But, I can’t let you put yourself in danger. I can’t live with the guilt that I could have prevented it, if something were to happen to you. So please, please don’t be angry at me,” he begs.

I sigh. This man. The man that I think I’m falling in love with. The one who is a fierce protector, is as vulnerable in his heart as a small child. All he wants to do is protect me. He doesn’t want to trap me or stop me from living. He’s already shown me so much about opening up and being myself.

“What hurt you, Denham?” I ask softly. I know there is something he’s not sharing. The pain is evident in his eyes, and I’m not even sure if sharing it with me will make it any better for him but he taught me that a problem shared, is a problem halved. The weight of that burden may never go away but it may just become that little bit lighter and easier to deal with.

He swings his leg over me, and perches on the edge of the bed with his elbows resting on his knees. His hands are pressed together and his fingers are steepled underneath his chin. I climb off the center of the bed and sit myself next to him.

“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to. But I’m listening, if you do.” I rest my hand on his thigh and stroke him with my thumb.

“My father …” He clears his throat before continuing. “He … he was an awesome guy. He would have loved you,” he says, smiling my way. “This place was his pride and joy. When he got it, it was run down. It was on the brink of collapse. He plowed everything he and mom had into it. He worked twenty-hour days for months, and nearly wound up dead from exhaustion. But, once it was running, every second that he sacrificed was worth it. It ran like clockwork. Then I noticed him start to look older, I mean, I know he wasn’t an old man. But it was like his eyes carried the weight of the world. He started to lose weight, and brushed it off that he had just been too busy to eat properly. The truth was, he was being threatened.” He unclasps his hands, and turns his body to me with one knee propped on the bed.

“You see, he didn’t buy The Kingdom, Ari. He was given it.”

I gasp audibly. That wasn’t what I was expecting to hear.

“What do you mean, he was given it?”

“He had a friend. Simon. They were buddies from high school.” He stands up and starts to pace the room. I hate to see him so uncomfortable, but he’s fit to burst from holding it in for far too long. The tension is showing through every pore and it I find it near impossible to just let him talk and not wrap him in my arms, and kiss him until he forgets. Then I realize what’s happening. I feel exactly the same as he does for me. If there’s an opportunity to take away all the hurt and pain that he’s feeling and prevent him from ever feeling it again, then I would do it. In a heartbeat.

“Unbeknown to my father, he had left this place to him in his will. No one knows why exactly. They had been great friends for many years, and Simon had a wife, who should have been the main beneficiary, but they were both killed in an accident. So we were never able to find out why he had left it to my father. ”

“Oh, god. That’s awful.”

He takes a deep breath. “It started off with a few ‘visits’ from a couple of heavies. It was several years after he had taken over, and made it very successful. They roughed him up, tried to make him sell the place. Of course, he didn’t want to give it up. And rightly so, he sacrificed years of his life and missed out on a lot, especially when Tara was a teenager. So, he told them where to stick it.”

I know I didn’t know Denham’s father, but from what he says, they were very much alike and it’s crystal clear how much he loved him. But, the guilt on Denham’s part, I don’t understand why.

“I watched it all happening. It was a little each day. The worry tortured him. But he wouldn’t give in. There was always someone watching him, I saw it with my own eyes, but I relied on him to tell me when he needed me. Once, there was a package delivered to his office. He was out, so I signed for it.” He rakes a hand across his face and draws a long breath through his teeth. “You know, I watched the color drain from his face when he came back and saw that package on his desk. I don’t think it was the first one but it was definitely the last. He threw it into his safe without even opening it. Kind of, ignorance is bliss, you know? Then we thought they had given up.” He stops pacing the room to stare out of the window. His hands on his hips, staring into the sky like it could take him away from the hurt. I don’t speak. He needs this.

“There was three months where no one came around. No one watched him when he came and went. No one bothered him. We stupidly thought it was all over. We thought they had gotten the message, and knew that they wouldn’t win.” I hear the tone of his voice change and it’s all I can do to keep my ass firmly planted on the bed and let him continue. But, I know he needs this. I know he needs to let it all out and as much as I think it’s hurting him, it’s something he has to do to move forward. My silence allows him to continue.

“It wasn’t over, Ari. Not for us anyway. I came back from a night out to find his office light still on. It wasn’t unusual, as he worked so damn hard. When I walked into his office, my life changed forever.”

The tone on his voice changes on the last word and he chokes it out. I can’t sit here any longer and see him hurting so much. I get to my feet and cross the room in just a few strides. My arms find their way around his waist from behind, and I hold him tight.

“They killed him, Ari. He wouldn’t give them what they wanted so they took his life … they took my dad,” he sobs, it moves up through his chest, and I feel it through my fingertips. He turns in my arms, burying his head in my shoulder. I’m sure these aren’t the first tears he’s shed for his father, but after seeing how he has taken on the role as head of the family, it makes me wonder if he ever felt like he could show his family this side of how he feels. I wonder if he’s truly ever had the chance to let it all out, and feel like he has someone to share all of this with.

“It wasn’t your fault,” I soothe, stroking his hair with one hand and holding him tight with the other. “There wasn’t anything you could have done to stop it.”

“You’re wrong,” he says, clearing his throat and wiping his eyes with the back of his arm. He starts to pace again. “I could have helped him. I knew, Ari. I saw it all unfolding but I was too wrapped up in my own life to take note of all the signs. In that package was a single bullet. It was a warning, and I should have known. I could have gotten us some security. Made sure he was safe at all times. Made sure we were all safe.”

“No, Denham.”

“Yes. Don’t make excuses for my selfishness. I should have seen it before it was too late and I didn’t. So, you see … I can’t make the same mistake with you.” He cups my face with his hands, firmly but not forcefully. “I’m falling in love with you, Ari. And … I don’t want something to happen to you like it did to my father, because I just couldn’t live with it, if it did.”

I open my mouth to speak, and he presses his thumb across my lips. “If you don’t feel the same then you need to tell me.”

I shake my head from side to side to tell him that I couldn’t possibly say something that isn’t true.

“No, you don’t feel the same?” he questions, but when he sees me frown, he grins and removes his thumb.

“I do feel the same,” I whisper.

His body relaxes in relief, and mine does too, to think that there’s so much more out in the open now and at least when he’s trying to make sure I’m okay, then I know what’s driving him to be so protective.

“So, please let me do this for you. For us. There’s something going on, and whether it has to do with your past, or mine. I will never live with myself if something happens to you that I could have prevented.”

Oh god, it might be nothing to do with my past. It could be the same people that killed his father trying to settle a score or unpaid debt. He must see the panic in my eyes as I try to process everything.

“What is it, Ari?”

“Well, did they ever find the man or men who killed your father?”

“No. But, they won’t. Not now. There wasn’t enough evidence. No prints, no camera footage, no witnesses.”

“What if …”

“What? They come back?”

“Yes.”

“I have more security in this place now than I ever have had.” It’s his turn to comfort me now and he does it with such ease and confidence that makes me realize how hard it was to let it be the other way around. “I’ll do everything I can to keep you safe, I promise.”

I sigh. It’s not what I wanted to hear tonight, not only because it actually pains my heart to hear the sorrow and guilt in Denham’s voice. But, because it means that there could be yet another thing we could face in the future, should we have a future together. Another thing to look over my shoulder for.

Could I do without this? Yes, for sure.

Is it worth it?

For Denham King … Without a doubt.

WE STAYED LIKE THAT
for what seemed like hours.

Just holding each other. Silently communicating our acceptance of each other’s situations, and what they might bring.

It was a gamble. I had learned that life was a gamble.

But, you have to chance it, in order to experience the highs and the lows. The good will only come if you have felt the bad and it won’t always come in the order you expect. In fact, I had come to expect the unexpected.

Denham nuzzles my shoulder, and sighs into my hair. My big, strong man. My fierce protector with such a gentle heart. His arms tighten around my waist, and I know if one of us doesn’t move soon, we could stay like this the whole evening.

“Denham,” I say softly

“Mmm hmm.”

“Are you okay?”

He doesn’t answer immediately, and I’m about to ask again when he speaks.

“Yes. You make everything okay.”

This makes me choke out a laugh, which strangely enough, lightens the mood.

“I make things ten times worse!” When I say this, I’m not exaggerating. It’s the truth. The guilt for bringing so much trouble to his door stabs at me, but I’m in too deep to run away.

“Don’t say that, Stunner.” Denham pulls back with a frown. “You’ve made everything so much more exciting.”

“Is that what you call it?” My lightheartedness breaks the marred lines across his forehead, and he smiles a lopsided grin, which shows off his dimple. I cock my head to the side, and smile back. I love it when he gives me that smile.