Authors: Rochelle Alers
R
egina crawled into bed with Parris, waking her up. She opened her eyes and peered over at the bedside clock. It was only five-thirty.
“What are you doing awake so early, Regina? You don’t have to go to school today.” Her voice was husky with sleep.
“I was dreaming too much,” Regina replied, snuggling closer to her mother.
“What were you dreaming about?”
“The man who said he was my father.”
Suddenly she was alert. “What did you dream about him?”
“He was calling me, and he couldn’t find me because I was hiding from him.”
You weren’t hiding from him, Regina
, Parris thought.
I was
.
“What did you do?”
“I let him find me.”
“What happened after that?”
“We were laughing. You, me and my father. All of us were laughing.”
Reaching over, Parris pulled Regina’s head to her shoulder. “Is that what you want, angel? Do you want to laugh with your father?”
Regina bit down on her lower lip. “I do, but…but then I’m afraid.”
“There’s no need for you to be afraid of your father, sweetheart. He’s wonderful.”
“If he’s so wonderful why isn’t he with us?”
“Something happened a long time ago before you were born and I couldn’t stay with your father. When I left him I didn’t let him know you were growing inside of my body.”
“Why not?”
“I didn’t have the time. Something important happened and I had to leave Florida right away.”
Regina stared up at her mother’s face. “You’re not going back to Florida, are you?”
Parris met her gaze. “No.”
“Does that mean my father is going to live in New York?”
“I don’t know,” Parris answered honestly. “He says that he’s going to stay in New York until he sees you.”
Regina picked at the lacy eyelet trim on the comforter, her sweeping eyebrows furrowed in a frown. She compressed her lips and twin dimples dotted her cheeks.
“I’ll let you know when he can see me.”
Parris nodded, holding her daughter close to her heart. Martin would have to wait until the child was ready, hoping it would come soon. She wanted it over so that she could get on with her life.
It was another three days of waiting before Martin picked up the telephone and heard Parris’s voice. Regina wanted to meet him.
He panicked! He raced out of the hotel and drove his rental car to the nearest mall and bought the largest stuffed bear they had available, but once he returned to his hotel room he had second thoughts.
He couldn’t buy the child’s affections. All he had to present was himself and either she accepted him or she rejected him.
He vacillated about bringing the bear, but in the end left it in the car once he parked in the visitors parking section at Parris’s housing complex.
The bite of the cold December wind chilled him through layers of wool and cashmere. His blood was too thin to withstand the harsh, bitterly cold northeast winter.
He rang the bell to Parris’s apartment, then pushed his gloved hands into the large pockets of his overcoat. The door swung open and he was momentarily stunned by the woman standing before him.
Her hair was curled and caught up in a ponytail that trailed over her shoulder like a dark ribbon. The familiar fragrance of Chanel No. 5 wafted from her body as she moved aside to let him enter. It had taken ten years for her to grow into the sophisticated scent.
“Come in.”
Her velvet voice beckoned him like a specter in a dream. He moved past her and walked into the living room, the heat from a crackling fire behind a decorative screen thawing his chilled body. It was the first time he noticed the room contained a fireplace.
Parris extended her hand. “I’ll take your coat.”
Removing his gloves, he slipped out of his coat and handed it to her. He examined her slender figure as she hung the coat up in a closet.
She wore what he had considered her favorite attire: bare feet and a pair of well-worn jeans with a white long sleeve T-shirt. Her body was still slim, still perfect.
Parris took her time hanging up Martin’s coat, trying to catch her breath. He was as dramatic as the first time she met him. Again he was dressed all in black: a wool turtleneck, slacks and shoes, and she concluded his short graying hair and moustache complemented his handsome face.
His footsteps were muffled in the deep pile of the cream carpeting as he walked over to the fireplace and extended his hands toward the heat.
A slight smile softened her mouth. “How are you surviving the cold weather?”
He turned and smiled at her. “Just barely. How long did it take you to get used to these temperatures?”
She was slightly taken aback by his sensual smile when the attractive lines fanned out around his large dark eyes. He still had the power to make her insides go soft and mushy.
“Just one winter. But if you make it through February you can consider yourself a veteran.”
“I don’t plan to be here in February,” Martin remarked confidently.
That remark reminded Parris why Martin Cole was standing in her living room. “I’ll go and get Regina for you.”
She turn to leave but Martin moved quickly, capturing her arm. “Parris.” Tilting her chin, she stared up at him. Touching her, inhaling her fragrance conjured up memories of their passionate lovemaking; a lovemaking that transcended the limits of sanity. A coming together he had never experienced before her or since she’d left him.
“I don’t want you to leave us alone. I think Regina would feel a lot more secure if she saw us together.”
Parris felt a warm glow flow through her. Martin had unselfishly considered Regina’s feelings even before meeting her. He didn’t want his daughter to fear him; he wanted the child to feel safe. The same way he once made her feel safe.
“Thank you, Martin.”
He released her arm and she made her way to Regina’s bedroom, recalling the time Martin had saved her life, cared for her while she convalesced from her ex-husband’s attempt on her life and protected her until she was forced to leave Florida. If he had known someone had been stalking her she knew he would have taken measures to keep her safe.
Regina sat on a rocking chair, her legs crossed in a yoga position, reading.
“He’s here, Regina.”
She glanced up from the book and laid it aside. She looked younger than nine with her hair plaited in two thick braids falling over her flat narrow chest. She was tall, even though her young body had not begun to show any indication of the onset of puberty.
Parris held out her hand and Regina rose to take it. Hand-in-hand they walked into the living room where Martin stood with his back to the fireplace.
Parris released Regina’s hand, staring mutely at the drama
unfolding before her eyes. She could hear the sound of her daughter’s and her former lover’s breathing as they stared at each other.
Martin’s gaze widened. Nothing he had ever experienced could have prepared him for the young child. Her hair was almost a blue-black, and curling around her face where it hadn’t been secured in the thick braids falling over her narrow shoulders. She had inherited his eyes, the curve of his eyebrows and his nose. Even the mouth was his. She bit down on her lower lip and her dimples were displayed.
Martin felt his pulses racing. His daughter was a feminine version of himself! She’s beautiful, he thought. It never mattered whether his thoughts were compromised by vanity, but she was truly magnificent.
Clasping his hands behind his back, he smiled at her. “Hello, Regina.”
“Hello.” Regina’s voice was low and soft.
Martin’s startled gaze shifted to Parris. The child had her mother’s voice.
“How are you?” Regina questioned, still not moving.
Martin could hardly contain himself. “Cold.” He couldn’t think of anything else to say. “I’m not used to cold weather,” he explained.
“Don’t you have winter in Florida?”
He smiled again. “We have winter but it’s not like your winters. The temperature rarely goes below freezing, and when it does it doesn’t stay there for a long time.”
“Don’t you have snow?”
“Hardly ever. Florida is known as the “Sunshine State” because the sun shines most of the time. But in the summer it gets very, very hot. That’s when everyone goes swimming two and sometimes three times a day.”
“I don’t know how to swim yet,” Regina admitted.
Martin walked over to the love seat and sat down, not taking his gaze off his daughter. “Maybe one of these days I’ll teach you how to swim.”
Regina, seemingly drawn to the tall man who was her father,
moved over to the love seat and sat down at the opposite end from Martin. Parris took a seat on the sofa.
“Will you teach me in Florida?” Regina continued.
Martin draped one trousered knee over the other, the gesture almost too elegant for a man of his size. He shook his head. “You don’t have to go to Florida to learn how to swim. You can learn anywhere.”
Regina nodded, staring at her folded hands on her lap; she had run out of questions.
Martin glanced at Parris, giving her a smile and nod of approval. She had done a wonderful job with the child. She was an excellent mother.
“What is it you like doing best, Regina?”
Regina’s face brightened with animation. “I like to cook. Mommy and I made monster cookies the other day.”
Lowering his leg, Martin leaned forward. “I also like to cook. I used to cook for your mother.”
“Do you want to taste Mommy’s and my monster cookies?”
Martin affected a frown. “These cookies won’t turn me into a monster, will they?”
Regina placed her hand over her mouth and giggled like a normal nine-year-old. “No. They’re just so big that we call them monsters.”
“If that’s the case I’d love to taste your monster cookies.”
Parris rose quickly to her feet. “I’ll get the cookies and make some hot chocolate.” Regina and Martin seemed comfortable enough with each other for her to leave them alone together.
She made her way to the narrow kitchen and opened the refrigerator to take out a carton of milk. The faces of two missing children stared back at her, and she thought of Regina’s fear that Martin would spirit her away from her mother.
Parris hadn’t known Martin very well yet instinctively she knew he would never try to take Regina away from her. He didn’t want the child without her mother.
She heated the milk carefully, then poured it into three mugs filled with powdered cocoa. The mugs were topped off with a froth
of whipped cream and placed on the dining area table with a plate of monster cookies.
“Everything’s ready,” she called out to Martin and Regina.
Regina escorted Martin to the table, holding his hand tightly. “See, monster cookies.”
“Good gravy!” he gasped, feigning astonishment. “You expect me to eat all of that?”
“That’s not too big, Daddy. I can finish one by myself.”
Martin and Parris registered the
Daddy
at the same time and were stunned at how easily it came from Regina. The title had acknowledged that she thought of him as her father.
They sipped the rich delicious hot chocolate and ate cookies while the sky darkened and Parris turned on an overhead chandelier in the dining area. The soft light highlighted the abundance of gray in Martin’s short hair and the rich dark color of his face.
He truly is beautiful, she mused. She remembered she had called him beautiful once and embarrassed him.
Martin couldn’t take his gaze off his daughter and he wondered if it was possible to love someone on sight. She was beautiful, charming, engaging and bright, and he felt a tugging of love from within his body that made it difficult to control his feelings.
He and Parris had created a perfect child.
He drank his chocolate and ate his monster cookie, declaring both delicious. Glancing at his watch, he rose to his feet. He had stayed for nearly an hour.
“I have to go,” he announced. It was only a half-truth. He wanted to stay forever, but he had to place an international telephone call.
Regina stared up at him. “When are you coming back, Daddy?”
He winked at her. “I’ll call you tomorrow and we’ll make a date.”
“I’m too young to date,” Regina squealed.
“You’re never too young to date your father.”
Parris stood up and tugged at one of Regina’s braids. The initial meeting had gone well.
“I’ll get your coat,” she said to Martin.
The three of them of stood at the door staring at one another.
Hunkering down, Martin pressed a kiss to Regina’s cheek. “I’ll call you tomorrow.” He straightened and leaned down and repeated the action with Parris. “Thank you,” he whispered near her ear.
He opened the door and then he was gone.
Regina wrapped her arms around her mother’s waist, smiling. “He’s nice, Mommy.”
Parris dropped a kiss on the top her head. “That he is, angel.”
What she didn’t say was that she still was in love with Martin. She’d never stopped loving him.
R
egina woke up the following morning, complaining of a headache yet insisted on going to school because she was scheduled to present her project on invertebrates in her science class. Science and English were her favorite subjects.
Parris tied a scarf around her daughter’s neck, pressing her lips to Regina’s forehead. “You feel a little warm. I want to take your temperature.”
“I’m going to be late for the bus, Mommy,” Regina whined.
“Okay, sweetheart. But if your headache doesn’t go away have the nurse call me and I’ll come and pick you up.”
“See you later, Mommy.” She raced out of the apartment to wait for her school bus.
Parris spent the morning changing bed linen and putting up several loads of wash. She had just completed vacuuming all of the rugs when the telephone rang.
“Parris,” came a familiar male voice.
“Martin.” She couldn’t help the breathless quality in her voice.
“I’d like to thank you.”
Her brow furrowed. “For what?”
“For the child. She’s delightful.”
Her frown vanished. “She’s quite a joy.” There came a beeping sound, indicating an incoming call. “Hold on, Martin. I have
another call.” She depressed the hook and picked up the call. It ended quickly and she depressed the hook again. “Martin, the school nurse just called. Regina has a fever and I have to pick her up from school.”
“Wait for me, Parris!” he shouted.
“I can’t, Martin.”
“Wait for me!” he insisted, then hung up.
Parris didn’t know how Martin got to her house within the time it took her to change her clothes and run a comb through her hair, and as she stepped out of the apartment he was already striding up the path to her building.
He took her arm and guided her to his car. He practically shoved her into the car and slammed the door. He slipped behind the wheel and shifted savagely into gear.
“How do I get there?”
Parris gave him the directions and he exceeded all of the speed limits, coming to a screeching halt in front of Regina’s school.
He followed Parris into the school, pacing the floor as they waited for the nurse to bring Regina to the front office.
Regina emerged, walking slowly, her face flushed. “My head still hurts, Mommy.”
Parris gathered her to her chest. “It’s all right, baby.”
Martin went to his knees and pulled Regina from Parris. He picked her up, his dark gaze searching the tiny face so much like his own. “We’re taking you home, cupcake.”
Regina dropped her head to his shoulder. “I don’t feel well, Daddy.”
Parris signed the release form, then followed Martin and Regina out of the school building. She sat in the back of the rented car, holding Regina as he retraced the route back to her apartment.
Parris put Regina to bed, then called the pediatrician. She listened intently to his instructions. She returned to Regina’s room and saw that Martin had pulled the rocking chair next to the bed. He cradled one of her hands in his. The scene was reminiscent of the time he had sat by her bed when her jaw was shattered.
She gestured to Martin and he rose to his feet and followed her out of the bedroom. “The doctor says she probably picked up a virus. He says to give her plenty of fluids and take her temperature every four to six hours. He says she’s going to feel pretty weak until her fever breaks.”
“Has he recommended any medication?”
“I have an aspirin-free medication he wants me to give her every four hours.”
His black eyes, filled with concern, impaled her. “Are you sure she’s going to be all right?”
“She’s been sick before, Martin. She’ll recover.”
He ran a hand over his hair, closing his eyes briefly. “This is all so new for me. I suppose being a father is going to take some getting used to.”
Parris patted his muscular shoulder. “You’ll make it.”
He tried smiling but it looked more like a grimace. “Do you mind if I come back to see her in the morning?”
“She’ll probably be out of it for few days. I’ll call you when she’s feeling better.”
“I still want to come.”
“Martin…”
“Don’t Martin me, Parris. She’s my child and I want to see her.”
Parris felt her temper rise quickly. “This is not about what you want, Martin. It’s about what’s right. You walk in here and declare that you want me for your wife while you expect me to fall in your arms and give you my consent; and now you demand to see a sick child who needs as much rest as she can get without you distracting or upsetting her.”
Martin grasped Parris’s arm, guiding her into the living room. He sat down on the sofa, pulling her down beside him. He held her hand, not permitting her to escape him.
“I wanted to marry you ten years ago, Parris, and I haven’t changed my mind. Do you want to know why?” He didn’t wait for her response. “Materialistically I have it all: money, fancy cars, custom-tailored clothes, a recognizable face, and a family name with enough clout to frighten those who displease me.
But none of it means spit because I don’t have what really matters to me.
“I never knew what it meant to give of myself until you came into my life. Suddenly I wasn’t the only person in my universe because I had someone else to share it with. You were that someone else, Parris.”
Parris shook her head, trying not to hear what he was saying. There was no room her life for Martin. She had changed; she was a different person.
“We can’t pick up the pieces, Martin. What we had is over. I’ve changed and you’ve changed.”
“The only thing that’s changed is ten years and Regina. We now share a child.”
“Wrong!” She inhaled deeply. “Why don’t you want to face reality? I don’t love you,” she lied, feeling a lump rise in her throat as soon as the words were said.
Martin leaned closer, his gaze unwavering. “How can you love Regina without loving me?”
“I can love you without being in love with you,” she argued.
His classically handsome features froze moments before his mouth curved into a smile. “Oh, please. Spare me the psychoanalytic prattle. I think you’ve been watching too many T. V. chat shows.”
A shadow of rage crossed her face and Martin recognized it immediately. He released her hand, rising to his feet. Gathering the coat he had tossed on the love seat, he slipped his arms into it.
“I’ll call you,” was all he said before he opened the door and walked out of her apartment.
Parris sat where she was, replaying Martin’s confession. If her feelings for him hadn’t changed in ten years there was no reason why his should’ve changed.
She had been only twenty-two when she fell in love with Martin, and she had been mature enough to know what they’d shared was a love that had been so strong and profound that it was destined to last a lifetime.
She had tried dating a couple of years ago, but each en
counter ended with her date promising to call her again. They never did. No man wanted to see a woman who wouldn’t let them touch or kiss her.
The doorbell chimed, followed by three rapid knocks. “Parris. It’s me.” Parris opened the door for Stephanie.
A slight frown marred Stephanie’s normally smiling face. “Is Regina all right? Scotty said she didn’t come home on the bus?”
“I picked her up early,” Parris explained. “The doctor says she probably has a virus. I’m going to keep her home for the rest of the week.”
Stephanie took a backwards step. “I’m not going to come in. The last thing I need is not feeling well on top of being humongous. A sick fat pregnant woman is not the nicest person to be around.”
“Just hope Scott doesn’t get it.”
“The only thing Scotty ever gets is a stomachache when he overeats. I don’t know whether to say anything,” Stephanie continued, lowering her voice, “but I saw a tall man coming out of your apartment yesterday and…”
“The man you saw is Regina’s father.”
Stephanie tried to look embarrassed as she glanced away. Her braided hair was swept up in a ponytail, making her look a lot younger than thirty.
“I kind of knew that,” she admitted. “Regina looks just like him. And I hope you don’t mind my saying it, but he’s hot, Parris.”
Parris recalled Stephanie’s assessment of Martin as she lay in bed, her mind blocking out the sound of the newscaster’s voice on the all-news radio station.
She smiled. Martin was hot. And it was not only his looks.
Martin had the power to make her want him every day and at any time. She never seemed to tire of him.
He never made love to her and she never made love to him—they always made love to each other. From the first time they shared a bed they shared whatever they had to give the other. There was no pretense, no guile.
She had given him her innocent body and he treasured the gift, reciprocating with his offer of marriage.
She had turned down his marriage proposal, but what Martin didn’t know was if she hadn’t been forced to leave Florida she would’ve married him after she discovered herself pregnant. She had grown up not remembering her father. She didn’t want the same for her unborn child.
However, that decision had been taken out of her hands the very night her pregnancy was confirmed, and Regina had lived the first nine years of her life not knowing who her father was.
Parris turned off the radio and snuggled under her blanket. She fell asleep immediately, and just as quickly the dreams began. She dreamt of Owen Lawson shouting obscenities. Owen dragging her into the ocean. Owen hitting her and the excruciating pain in her face. She dreamt of Martin holding her, kissing her. She dreamt of floating and responding to the fire of Martin’s powerful lovemaking. The nightmare ended with the raspy voice of the man who threatened to put a bullet in her head, killing her and the child in her womb. She remembered his promise to cut Martin into little pieces before he threw what was left of his body into a lake filled with alligators.
She woke up, her body drenched with moisture and her mouth screaming a silent scream. Then she cried. It had been ten years since she cried, and when the tears no longer flowed she lay on the wet pillow and fell into a deep dreamless sleep.
Parris heard the ringing of the telephone through a thick fog. She picked up the receiver, swallowing to relieve the dryness in her throat.
“Hel-lo.”
“Parris. Are you all right?”
Falling back to the pillow, she closed her eyes. “What time is it, Martin?”
“It’s eight o’clock. How’s Regina?”
The cloudiness in her brain cleared instantly. Regina! She replaced the telephone receiver and jumped from the bed.
Her heart was pumping uncontrollably as she raced into Regina’s bedroom. Holding a hand to her chest, she walked over to the four-poster bed and stared down at the sleeping child.
She pressed a hand to Regina’s forehead. Thankfully it was cooler than the night before. She would let her sleep.
It was only after she’d returned to her bedroom that Parris remembered she had hung up on Martin. She dialed the number to his hotel room, listening as the phone rang and rang. Shrugging her shoulders, she hung up and made her way to her bathroom to shower.
Parris covered her feet with a thick pair of cotton socks before she slipped into a pair of laundered jeans. The jeans had been washed so many times that they were now a pale blue shade. She pulled on a light gray sweatshirt, then brushed her hair, securing it in an elastic band.
She checked on Regina again and found her awake. “How are you feeling this morning?”
“My head still hurts a little bit.” Her voice came out in a croaking sound.
Parris removed a thermometer from its case and inserted it under the child’s tongue. She sat down on the side of the bed. “I’m going to see if you still have a fever, then I’ll run some water for you to take a bath and change your bed. You’re going to have to drink a lot of juice and water.” She watched Regina wrinkle her nose when she mentioned water. The child did not like to drink water.
She removed the thermometer. One hundred point two. It was down from the previous one hundred and two, but Regina still had a fever.
Parris and Regina were startled by the ringing of the doorbell and the pounding on the front door.
“Stephanie,” they said in unison.
Parris raced to the front door, but before she could open it she heard his voice calling her.
She flung the door open, shouting at the same time. “Are you mad?”
A coatless Martin pushed past her. “Where is she?”
She stared at Martin glaring down at her. “What are you talking about?”
“Is Regina all right?”
“Of course she’s…”
“Why did you hang up on me?” Martin asked, cutting her off.
Heat suffused her face in embarrassment. “I’m sorry. Your call woke me up and when you mentioned Regina I remembered she was sick and I guess I kind of hung up on you.”
Martin ran a hand over his hair. “You kind of hung up? When you slammed the phone down in my ear I thought something had happened to her.”
“I tried calling you back,” Parris countered.
“I probably was on my way over here.”
“And without your coat.”
Martin stared down at his running shoes, jeans and sweater as if he’d never seen them before. “I suppose I panicked.” His head came up slowly and he smiled, the dimples in his cheeks deepening as Parris returned his smile.
“Can I see her?” he asked shyly.
“Wait until I give her a bath and change her bed. Then you spend as much time with her as you want.”
Martin spent the entire day with Regina, sitting on the rocker and reading to her as she dozed on her bed. He gave her her medication, coaxed her into drinking water and shared the lunch Parris had prepared for the both of them.
Parris spent most of her time in her bedroom, sitting at her desk and going over a stack of photographs she had taken of the furnishings of an estate she’d catalogued for a client. The large Dutch manor house overlooking the Hudson River had yielded priceless treasures dating back to the early seventeenth-century. Most pieces of furniture had found their way to the New World via the Dutch West India Company.