Authors: Milly Taiden
Tynder nodded. “The elders have spoken and said that unless the challenge is openly stated in front of them, your death does not mean your family loses the pride leader position. It will just go to the next one of your appointment.”
Stripes returned at that moment. “Yes. They’re saying from now on you’ll have to make a list of backups in case something happens to you and that list will be sealed and guarded. No one can get to it. It would only be opened if something happened to you. If for whatever reason the seal is broken and you’re alive, they’d request a new list from you.”
Gray nodded.
Lyss swallowed hard, feeling cold and shaky all of a sudden. “Do you all mind not talking about Gray dying right now?”
“Sorry,” Tynder and Stripes apologized.
“Let’s get you cleaned up, darling.” He carried her up to the shower while the lower level was scrubbed. Then he took her to bed once they’d showered. There was no need for words. He made love to her like a man starved. A man who needed her. She needed him as well. She’d come to the conclusion she needed him a lot more than she’d realized. She loved him.
ELEVEN
Alyssa rushed to open the door after the third knock. Gray had installed a security system so she could see who was nearby while watching TV. He wasn’t home but she recognized the woman on the screen and rushed to open the door.
“Hi.” She smiled at the young woman. “You’re Katherine from the auto shop, right? Or is it Kat? Got my car fixed?”
Katherine nodded. “Either is fine. I came to bring you your keys.”
Lyss took them from her and opened the door wider. “Thank you. Would you like to come in?”
Katherine glanced at the inside and shook her head. “No. I should go.” She turned on her heel and stopped. Then she glanced at Lyss again. “I admit, I’m surprised.”
“At what?” she asked, feeling out of the loop.
“I was always under the impression human women wanted love out of a relationship. But from what I’ve heard, you’re perfect for Gray because you don’t.”
She frowned. “Excuse me?”
Katherine shrugged. “I guess I had my facts wrong. Good luck with Gray. He’s a great leader.”
Lyss watched Katherine leave with concern. She was still standing by the door when Tynder arrived. He was supposed to go grab some of her belonging from her house. Gray didn’t like the idea of her going back and finding David there again.
“Ready to go?”
“Yes.” She slipped out of the house and into his truck quietly. Her thoughts were a jumbled mess. Why would Katherine say that? She’d never told anyone she didn’t want love. In fact, she’d specifically told Gray that she did.
She waited until they were almost at her house before she finally said something. “Tynder, may I ask you a question?”
He glanced at her quickly before looking back at the road. “Of course, Alyssa. Whatever you need I will help.”
She smiled. He’d become a good friend the past few weeks. “Why did Katherine say that I didn’t want love and was therefore okay for Gray?”
Tynder squeezed the steering wheel and gave her an apologetic smile. “She doesn’t know what she’s talking about.”
She knew he was lying. How? She had no clue, but she knew. “Tell me. Please.”
“Everyone knows Gray doesn’t believe in love. Hell, he didn’t even sign himself up for the PDA, Stripes did.”
“What?” She froze in place. “You mean he didn’t really want to be matched with anyone?”
Tynder sighed. “No, he didn’t. But you both worked it out where he could have what he needed and you don’t have crazy expectations of love.”
She didn’t? So what the hell was the point of everything they’d agreed to? Why was she living with Gray and allowing her cats to fall in love with him as much as she had? There was only one person who could tell her what the hell had been on the request for Gray’s match. Mrs. Wilder.
“Forget going to my house,” she said, her throat closing up on her. “We need to make a quick stop somewhere else.”
* * *
Something was wrong. He didn’t know what, but he had a feeling it was Alyssa.
“What’s up?” Stripes asked from the passenger side.
“I need to go to Alyssa.”
Stripes pulled out his phone. “Where are you?” He’d called Tynder.
A few moments later, he hung up. “They went to Gerri Wilder’s place.”
“Did he say if Alyssa’s okay?” His gut twisted in knots. Something was definitely wrong. He sensed her distress even from this far apart.
“She’s not. She’s very upset and he says he can’t tell us because he’s been threatened to be neutered if he does.”
He floored it, breaking speed limits and not giving a fuck. He had to get to her and find out what was wrong.
When he arrived at Gerri Wilder’s apartment, an older woman with a serious frown opened the door. “Let me guess, you’re the kitty?”
Kitty? He’d been called a lot of things in his time but kitty was certainly not one of them. “I’m Grayson Green. Are you Mrs. Wilder?”
“Gerri, please. And yes, I am.” She glanced up and down his body before moving to stare openly at Stripes. “Oh, you’re a fine one.”
“Excuse me, Gerri, but I’m looking for Alyssa.”
She nodded. “I know that. But she’s pissed at you right now.”
He frowned. “Can you tell me why?”
He hadn’t said or done anything for Alyssa to be angry. They’d been getting along great. He’d never wanted to be around anyone like he did her. She was refreshing and fun. She didn’t try to tell him what to do or suggest he change anything about himself. She just let him be.
“Did you or did you not sign up for my services?” Gerri snapped, her eyes glowing gold.
“No, he didn’t.” Stripes grabbed Gerri’s hand and smiled. “I did on his behalf.”
Gerri moved close in front of Stripes and yanked her hand out of his grasp. Stripes turned to Gray and shrugged. Clearly the older woman wasn’t in the mood for Stripes to try and smooth things over.
Gray opened his mouth to say something when suddenly Gerri slapped the side of Stripes’ head. “Do either of you pussies understand what a matchmaking site is for?”
She’d called them pussies. Gray had a hard enough time wrapping his mind around that and the fact she’d smacked Stripes upside his head without adding whatever was going on with Alyssa.
“It” —she breathed out slowly— “is to find love. The right person to be with.”
He nodded, feeling almost as if he didn’t, he’d be in even bigger trouble with the older woman.
“So why, did Alyssa come here and say you were not looking for love?” Gerri folded her arms over her chest and raised a brow high. “Explain that one to me hairball.”
He bit back the urge to tell her to quit calling him names. “I don’t do love. Everyone in my pride knows that.”
Gerri narrowed her eyes. “Well it would have been nice if it was put on your application. Now I have a woman who’s in love with you and is distressed because she thinks you don’t love her back and never will.” Gerri’s gaze traveled back and forth between him and Stripes. “I swear to God, I need to hire an assistant before I lose my mind and bite someone’s head off when shit like this happens.”
“She’s wrong,” he said.
Gerri stopped and stared at him. “Oh?”
“She’s wrong. It’s not what she thinks.” He nodded. “I know it looks bad, but let me talk to her.”
“I don’t know, she’s really angry right now.” She gave him a once-over again. “I’d promised her love, marriage and children.”
He nodded. “Let me talk to her. I can fix it.”
She gazed deep into his eyes and smiled. “Come on in.” She pushed her front door open and let them in. “I’m going to need to keep a bottle of Vodka handy for these kind of visits.”
Gray walked into the large apartment and immediately saw Alyssa standing by a window. She turned to look at him with so much sadness, his heart shattered.
“Why didn’t you tell me you didn’t do love?” she asked. “I told you from the beginning what I wanted.”
He cleared his throat, ignored his two guards and the old woman and marched to Alyssa’s side.
“I wanted you from the moment I saw you,” he admitted.
“Want is not love.” She turned to glance out the window again. “You let me believe we could have something. That in time you might grow to love me.”
“Alyssa.”
“No! I opened myself up to you from the moment you held my hand and walked me around the woods. I nurtured my feelings and let them grow to the point I couldn’t control how much I felt for you.” She turned back to him, eyes filled with tears. “How much I loved you.”
He swallowed hard. The tiger in him hurt seeing her so upset. “I’m sorry.”
She shook her head. “I refuse to be some woman you have sex with. I deserve more. I deserve to be loved.”
“You’re right.”
“I’m glad you feel that way. I’ve decided our agreement will not work. You can just ship my stuff and I’ll send someone to get my car.”
His lungs tightened. A dull throbbing took hold of his chest at the thought of her not being with him anymore. She was his and nothing was going to change that. “I’m sorry. Our agreement can’t be broken.”
She wiped at the tears racing down her cheeks. “Why not?”
He had to do it. He had to tell her or lose her. “Two things. The first is, I can’t live without you.”
She gasped. “How can you say that? You know how hard this is right now. Why not let me go?”
He closed the distance between them. “I can’t let you go.” He took a deep breath and finally said the words living inside his heart. “Because I love you.”
“You don’t do love.”
He held her by her arms and turned her to face him. The tears in her eyes were like daggers to his heart. “I may not do love, but it doesn’t mean I control my emotions.” He lifted a hand and cupped her jaw. “From the first time I saw you, I decided to label my feelings as lust and need.” Her bottom lip trembled punching new agony through his body. “The truth was that what I felt was deeper, stronger, better than anything I’d ever felt for anyone in my life.”
He couldn’t take it. He pulled her into his arms and hugged her. “I’m so sorry, my love. I do love you. Please don’t cry, it hurts to see you this way.”
“I’m not crying. I never cry.” She sniffled and sobbed.
“Right, okay. What can I do to help you stop ‘not’ crying?” he asked, the human side and the tiger both beyond agitated. “I was scared to acknowledge my feelings as love.”
She inhaled sharply. A fresh wave of tears dropped down her cheeks. “You don’t want to love me.”
“It’s not that I don’t want to love you. I’m not used to feeling so many things for one person.” He sighed, wishing he had the right words to explain himself. Always the loner and quiet, he’d never had to explain his feelings like he did at that moment.
“You don’t choose who you love,” she murmured.
He pulled back and met her gaze. There was so much pain there. Sadness. “I was afraid to admit how I felt.”
She sniffled and frowned. “Why?”
“I didn’t want to be at the mercy of my feelings. You could hurt me and that wasn’t something I was used to.”
She shook her head and glanced down at his chest. “I’d never hurt you. I love you.”
“I love you too, Alyssa. Please give me a chance to prove it to you. Come home with me. I won’t hold back anymore.”
Alyssa had never been so torn in her life. She could give Gray a chance at proving he really did love her, or she could move on. She had promised herself she wouldn’t let men take her for a fool anymore, but her heart broke at the thought of not being with Gray. He’d been the first man to accept her exactly as she was. Curvy, silly, and obsessed with her cats. Sex with Gray had opened a new door to a passion she’d never experienced before. He truly wanted her as she was.
“Okay,” she blurted before she changed her mind. “I’ll give you another chance on one condition.”
“Anything!”
“Needing your space is fine, but pushing me away is not. Emotional distance creates pain and I won’t tolerate it. If you mean what you’re saying you will open up to me.”
He nodded and enveloped her in a tight hug again. She sighed, no longer as upset as when she’d first walked in.
“So what’s the second thing?” Gerri asked, intruding in the moment. “I gotta say, I’ve been dying to hear the second part to that speech.” She smiled at Alyssa. “I told you I’d find you the right man. Sometimes I need to pull them by the tail, but I found him.”
Alyssa smiled and gazed up at him. “What is the second thing?”
“You’re carrying my cubs.”
She gasped, pushed away from him and felt her belly. “I’m pregnant?”
He nodded, a slight frown marring his brow. “You’re not angry are you?”
She might be a little scared, but—wait. “Did you say cubs? As in plural?”
Gerri laughed. “Congratulations. This will be the most interesting five months of your life.”
Five months? She rubbed a hand on her temple. “This is a little much to take in.”
He helped her sit down and hugged her to his side. “I’ll do whatever you need. I promise.”
“Can you tell me what you meant when you said cubs?” She hoped he didn’t mean there were literal cubs growing in her womb. That would be too weird even for her.
“Babies. Sorry. Not actual tigers.”
She breathed a shaky sigh of relief. “Okay.
That
I can handle. Now how many are we talking about?”
She’d never held more than one baby. Thinking of multiples started to make her lightheaded.
“Three.”
Three! Holy shit that was two more babies than she was sure she could handle at a time. She glanced at Gray and couldn’t hold back the love she felt for him. He looked scared as if she’d be upset because she was carrying multiples.
“I guess we better get to work on that nursery,” she said and threw her arms around his neck.
“God, I love you.”
She grinned, inhaling the scent she now recognized as uniquely him. “I love you too.”